“He’s a student at the Seoul Institute for the Performing Arts. The guy I’ve been thinking about day and night is a student at the Seoul Institute for the Performing Arts. Can my life get any more depressing?” Lu Han whines, dropping his head and banging it on the table. He and Lay are eating lunch again, this time with Sehun.

“So Espresso Guy is SIPA scum?” Sehun asks over a mouthful of rice. Pieces of it fly out of his mouth and in Lay’s direction. Lay doesn’t notice.

“His name is Minseok,” Lu Han points out before throwing his arms into the air. “I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve this. I’ve been single for the past four years and the first guy to catch my eye is out of bounds. I must have kicked puppies in my past life. That’s the only explanation.”

“Lu Han, I think you’re being too over-dramatic.”

“You’re being too under-dramatic Zhang Yixing.” Snapping his head up, Lu Han slams his hands on the table and stands up, obtaining the entire room’s attention while he does so. “You’ll never understand how I feel!”

“Untwist your , Lu Han. And stop provoking him, Lay.” Sehun scolds and stands as well just so he can push Lu Han back into his seat.

“I didn’t do anything!”

“Why does the world hate me?!”

Sehun rolls his eyes at being ignored (as always when Lay and Lu Han are together and in full drama mode). He glances around the cafeteria, checking out all of the students engaged in conversation or a book or whatever else.

“And only I’m surrounded by idiots.” He murmurs to himself after scoping the entire room. He doesn’t mean to be heard but Lu Han’s ears pick up on his comment and Sehun barely dodges a swift punch aimed at his throat.

Lu Han shoots up again, gathering his books together. “You know what, if you two are going to be like that, I’m going to go sit with someone else.” He looks around, searching for someone, anyone.

Sehun stares at Lu Han before he bursts out in uncontrollable laughter.

“You don’t have any other friends beside us.” He smirks and Lu Han flips him off, still looking around.

A blur of black with brown hair walks by and Lu Han almost hits himself in the face when he jumps and flails and almost tackles the person.

“Meet my new best friend. Byun Baekhyun.”

Baekhyun’s left eye twitches for the third time in the past minute and a half. He’s been glaring at nothing for the past five. His nerves are fraying, he’s becoming frazzled, and it’s all because of this stupid Chinese vocal music major, Lu Han.

“Are you listening to me, best friend?”

He resists the urge to groan and run his hands over his face. He can’t smudge his eyeliner. Not when he puts it on meticulously and perfectly every morning without fail. His eyeliner completes his mysterious art student look. It keeps his loyal subjects on their toes and always curious of what handsome look he’s going to toss in their direction next.

Legs pulled up and his sketchbook sitting on his knees, Baekhyun continues his sketching, paying no attention to the crazed guy beside him. Lu Han has followed him around for the past couple of days, and, to be frank, it’s damn annoying. Sure Baekhyun likes being noticed and he adores his subjects but he doesn’t like being stalked. And Lu Han is a stalker.

Baekhyun lives in the grit and grime of Seoul, miles away from Lu Han’s uptown apartment but that doesn’t stop the latter from showing up at his front door every morning for the past three days. He even came yesterday when Baekhyun didn’t have a class until late afternoon. Lu Han probably thinks he’s being nice, offering to take the bus with Baekhyun, but he’s more creepy than nice. The way he smiles is odd too. Like he wants to eat Baekhyun’s soul.

“Best friend?” Lu Han places an arm on his shoulder and Baekhyun shakes it off violently.

He glares at Lu Han from the corners of his eyes but the extra happy guy doesn’t seem to notice it. Looking back at his sketchbook, he sighs. Lately he hasn’t had inspiration to work and it’s really getting to him. Baekhyun can’t function properly if he isn’t working on a sculpture. Especially not when he has a deadline in two weeks.

Closing and setting the sketchbook aside, he sighs again.

Out of nowhere, Lu Han tries to bump their elbows together but he does it so forcefully the two come crashing down on the grass outside of one of the freshman dorms. Glaring at him openly, Baekhyun snarls.

“You have two seconds to get off of me or I’m beating you to a pulp.”

Lu Han blinks and doesn’t move. “It seems I have been cursed to try to befriend major s.”

Baekhyun’s arms are curled into his chest and Lu Han is lying on top of him. For a skinny boy, Lu Han is heavy and Baekhyun does not have the energy to move his arms to push him off.

“Get off of me if you think I’m an , then.” He says, trying not to get too overtaken by his anger.

Humming, Lu Han tilts his head to the right. “No. No, I don’t think I will.”

“I’ll murder you.”

“I’ll haunt you.”

And thus was the start of a friendship more dysfunctional than Lu Han’s and Sehun’s.

"Bubble tea~!"

The only person Baekhyun hates more than Lu Han is Oh Sehun because Sehun is a psychotic freak who needs to lay off the sugar.

Lu Han, of course, is ignorant to Baekhyun's distress and he tugs at the art student's wrist just as Sehun is tugging on his his.

(In all actuality, Lu Han notices how Baekhyun doesn't approve of being dragged into their bubble tea ritual ritual thing but he really doesn't care about Baekhyun's wants and dislikes).

"I won't have to go through this alone anymore. You'll learn to get used to Sehun's boba mania." Lu Han squeezes his wrist in what he hopes comes off as comfort. He ignores the way Baekhyun's right eye twitches.

Luna is off work that day at the bubble tea place. Victoria stands at the register instead, bobbing her head along with the pop song playing overhead. The three of them walk over to her. When she notices them, she turns with a smile, still bobbing her head. Lu Han is reminded of one of those bobble-head figures.

“Victoria, Victoria, where is my sweet sweet Victoria?” Sehun calls, his hand cupping around his mouth to amplify the sound.

“Sehunnie baby~” Victoria coos, walking out from behind the counter with her arms wide open. Sehun sidles over to her and into her arms. The two hug and sway to the music inside their heads, on a different tempo than the song playing in the shop.

Lu Han wonders how Sehun has all of the women at this place wrapped around his finger. Clearing his throat, Lu Han crosses his arms over his chest and raises an eyebrow at the two. Sehun sticks out his tongue and tightens his hold around Victoria who laughs and slips out of his grip easily.

She goes over to punch Lu Han in the shoulder. “You can’t be getting jealous now, I heard from Luna that you have the feels for some guy,” she smiles and walks back around the counter.

Sehun tosses an arm around Lu Han and drags him over to the counter. Baekhyun follows soundlessly.

“And the best thing about it is: the guy is a piece of SIPA trash.” The youngest boy smirks, ignoring the glare Lu Han gives him.

Before Victoria has a chance to say anything that would quite possibly annoy Lu Han more than Sehun sharing his business around, Baekhyun gasps.

“You’re dating a student from the Seoul Institute of the Performing Arts?!”

Lu Han sighs, dropping his head in defeat.

“We’re not dating,” he says, “and I don’t even plan on dating him. I don’t know him. I don’t like him like that. Just because I said he has a nice smile and I freaked out over how I knew him, everyone assumes I’m in his pants.”

He slams his hands on the counter, straightens his back and yells: “I’m stil single, alright?!”

Victoria and Baekhyun look at him with wide, surprised eyes. Sehun looks like he’s on the verge of laughter.

“Well that’s nice to know,” comes a familiar voice that doesn’t belong to any of the three people next to him. Turning around, Lu Han feels his heart stop.

Minseok smiles, eyes crinkled in amusement. “You may be in the midst of a mental breakdown, but do you think I can order a strawberry smoothie?”