“Dae, Mommy’s here,” I said trying too soothe her cries. I groaned as I opened my eyes as the crying wouldn’t cease. “Sh, Sh, Sh,” I said with rhythm, as I hastily got out of bed to tend to her. Because I got out so quickly from my slumber, I got dizzy.

“Whoa…” I said as I tried to find the bed in the moving room. That’s pretty unsafe, especially holding a baby. I heard a crumpling sound as I sat on the bed, and found a little note under my .

Left for morning jog. Take care of Dae for awhile. Sorry babe.

-DD

Ps. You should start jogging with me… you know, step 2 ;)

I scoffed and rolled my eyes at his note. Stupid.

As I got re-accustomed to my surroundings, I stood up again, trying to relax Dae from her crying.

I started singing Dongwoon’s and Dujun’s song from when I first met them.

~

“Hyung!” Youngwon yelled running to David, who just came through the door, sweaty and still perspiring.

“Bwoh?” David huffed. Youngwon stood behind David as Daniel came running into the room with a spatula.

“What’s wrong LEE DONGRIM?” Daniel said menacingly, with an evil looking smile, carefully holding the spatula.

“IT’S YOUNGWON,” Youngwon said strongly from behind David but then Daniel made a threatening shove of the spatula towards Youngwon and David, but youngwon gasped. “J-just because I’m just a y-year older doesn’t mean you shouldn’t call me h-hyung!” He tried to keep his voice strong, but it ended up faltering.

David squinted at the spatula, unnerved from his dongsaengs usual behavior. David looked behind him at a scared youngwon with his eyebrow cocked up. “You’re scared of Ladybugs?”

Comfortably perched on the spatula was a tiny red lady bug. It fluttered its wings but didn’t fly away, causing Youngwon to shriek.

“Sh, you might wake up the baby,” Daniel said chuckling.

“Aye, Aye, Daniel, respect your hyung, Youngwon, grow some balls,” David said nonchalantly leaving the two to settle their own problems. As David went up the stairs he heard a few more shrieks from Youngwon and Daniel muttering, “See not bad, they’re like real ladies, once their all over you, can’t get them off,”

David walked passed his semi-opened room to the bathroom, but took a few steps back.

He peeked through the tiny crack and saw her holding their child.

She was singing. The song sounded familiar, but he couldn’t just name it yet. He spent a few seconds infront of the door, listening to her comforting voice as the baby lessened her crying to cooing.

Then she got to the chorus.

“I muni dachimyeon…”

David frowned retreating to the bathroom, locking the door and turning on the shower.

And he watched the door close. Symbolically and literally. He knew he had to let her go. He was even helping her get with Dongwoon. He never felt so weak as he stepped into the shower, the water hitting his warmed up muscles. He never felt so weak… he never felt a song personify itself in his life so much before. Questioning himself on how such an ironic situation could present itself in his life, he knew that it still was all his mistake. If he never spent that careless night with her all those months ago, she wouldn’t have their baby-he would never feel such a huge loss.

Even so, he smiled apathetically. “I just lost what could’ve been my wife and kid.”

~

I never paid so much attention to the song as I did now. I looked at Dae’s endearing round eyes.

Her face was red from crying but now lessening as I gave her a toy.

I sat on the bed feeling like something ripped at my chest.

When this door closes, when the image of you disappears, I’ll probably spend the day in tears. Because of the memories with you, I’m left alone, I wish that you’ll be happier. When I let go of your hand now, I’ll no longer have any reason to smile, but when I see you smiling, in another’s embrace, I’ll try to smile for you.

Yoojoo and Dongwoon. I need to let go and have him be happier with her. This hurts a lot. I’m singing a song that mocking my life right now.

I realized this as I continued singing to Dae. “Maeumi Yakhaejyeoseo, Dasi neol Japgi jeone Nunmul heullil, nal boji anke, Doraboji malgoga,” I paused at the highest part or of the song.

My heart has become weak, Before I can be with you again. So you don’t see my tears that come out, please, don’t look back… just go.

I saw a drop on Dae’s face as she looked at me curiously. She cooed and rubbed her face. I touched my own face, before another tear dropped on Dae. She smiled though, cooing more. Her smile rejuvenated me in my time of resignation-resignation because I did feel weak. Dongwoon has Yoojoo now. He should be happier, that’s why we broke up. And I did cry, I cried a lot.  But he doesn’t and won’t know about that. All he’ll see is a strong girl with a baby. If I’m independent and strong to others, I can be independent and strong to myself.

I took a long pause hearing the shower in the bathroom next door while pondering if I’m fighting an unjust war. In other words, If I’m doing the right thing, lying and putting much effort into my love for this boy who’s already with another girl. I sighed, quickly wiping my tears away as the shower ended and then the door-probably the bathroom door-open.

I was right as David entered the room with a towel around his waist.

I gulped down, focusing on his FACE and not body. But since I was in a vulnerable state, it wasn’t that hard.

He went straight into the closet after nodding his head in recognition of us.

I bounced Dae as I rubbed her belly and made her coo and smile, which always makes me smile.

He came out, rubbing the towel on his hair like he did last time he took a shower. I laughed noticing this.

“Are your eyes always this red when you wake up?” He said facing me in fresh clothing.

I gave him a confused look as I took my phone and looked at the reflection.

“Oh, haha…” I said nervously. I nodded as Dae looked grumbley.

“I’m going to feed Dae,” I said standing up.

“Wait for me,” David said sprinting to the bathroom to hang his towel, probably, and came back gesturing to hold Dae.

I gave her to him as we walked down the stairs together.

“It’s 10am, and they’re still not awake.” I said plopping next to sleeping Junnie and sleeping Jisu. Dari on the floor was also sleeping. They all snored in unison.

“Wow, even in sleep, they are like their singing,” Youngwon said walking to the couch, leaning against the arm of the couch, with his right arm out, munching on something.

“You know we’re just that good.” Daniel said as he followed Youngwon and imitated Youngwon by munching also,.

I looked to David who was looking through the drawers with one hand, carrying Dae with the other. “Where’s hyung?” He said probably about Intae.

“Grocery shopping, he needs his fresh kimchi you know.” Youngwon answered. I groaned, I was more of a fermented Kimchi person. Fresh tasted odd to me.

“I’ll cook breakfast then,” David announced.

“Don’t use the spatula!” Youngwon and Daniel warned.

“Why?” David and I said, I was examining Youngwon and why he keeps touching his arm. “And what’s wrong with your arm?”

He gestured for me to come over as Daniel rolled his eyes, switching places with me.

“Youngwon has a lady friend.” He said.

I looked at his arm, and he was keeping a lady bug safe there.

“Isn’t she beautiful,” Youngwon said more like a statement.

I laughed at him, as David came looking at the lady bug and I held my hands out to hold Dae.

“I’ll hold her!” Daniel said, arms out.

“Okay,” I said leaning back as Dae’s wide eyes went from David to me to Daniel then to me again.

“hi baby,” Daniel said as the baby sat on his knee and he bounced her up and down.

“Oh, good job overcoming your fear Youngwon,” David muttered as he started the stove.

“Thanks hyung!” He said happily, ‘petting’ the tiny thing on his arm.

“How is it I hear Dae’s cooing over the snoring of these three? Is this even possible,” Intae said as the garage door slammed and he carried one pastic bag.

“Hyung!” Youngwon said standing up and showing him the insect on his arm.

“It’s because Daniel succeeded in making Dae laugh.” I answered, smiling and poking my baby, making her coo-laugh easier.

“Huh, baby, uncle Dan is Daebak, huh?” Daniel said holding her and blowing a raspberry on her stomach causing her to coo loudly or laugh.

I giggled watching her laugh and tickled her belly more.

“So let’s go shopping later for a high seat,” David announced.

“I think I have one back at the house-“ I said to him as he turned off the stove.

“Yeah,” I heard a groggy voice answer, “Halmoni gave you a set,” Junnie said yawning and finally sitting up. “Dae can be a great alarm clock, I like waking up to a baby’s laugh,” He smiled and I threw a pillow at his sarcastic sounding voice. “I meant it!” he said hands in the air.

“Hyung, do you get bad hangovers?” Youngwon asked as Junnie stared at the ladybug.

He shook his head, and youngwon continued, “Oh that leaves only Dari hyung with bad hangovers, just a heads up warning.” He said standing up.

“Breakfast is ready!” David announced.

“Well it’s brunch now,” Intae commented.

“Whatever, food’s ready,” David replied.

We all found ourselves in the kitchen as Daniel handed me over Dae, staring at the food.

“Didn’t you guys just eat?” David said, arms crossed staring at the two young ones-youngwon and Daniel, grabbing at the foods.

They nodded, “Hyung,” Daniel said staring at Youngwon and emphasizing the word, “after seeing the ladybug, he stopped cooking mid way, so we had a half-cooked meal, which was not very appetizing. “ He frowned rubbing his stomach.

They started arguing as I thought outloud, “A high chair would be nice,” I said smelling the food and swaying side to side carrying Dae and giving her kisses.

“Dude,” Daniel started hitting Youngwon’s arm.

I didn't know the right place to stop the story -_- I wanted a longer chapter this time so anyways, hope you enjoy!!! Make sure to look up the lyrics to Maknae and leadah's -"when the doors close" and watch out for an update! This part was long over due -_-