Y'ELLO READERS, enjoy this chap. .

“Junnie! I’m a , I’m a ,” I whined, tugging on his sleeve.

He patted my head, “No, well, sometimes, but overall you’re not, trust me,”

“Dongwoon-ah is driving me crazy,” I said halting from our mini-walk, crossing my arms.

Junnie turned around with a stern look. “He doesn’t mean harm, It’s better than an abusive relationship.”

“I’m being abused!” I whined, “emotionally,” I said cracking a sideways smile.

“Do you really feel this way?” he said still being serious, making me feel just plain dumb. It does mean a lot that Junnie actually likes the guy I’m in a relationship with, because usually he does not like them… for some reason.

“I don’t know, I can’t think straight, I’m furious, I’m mad, I’m confused, but worst, maybe not worst, maybe the best of all, I’m PREGNANT.” I said harshly, but not entirely serious, it seems I’m over using my ‘I’m pregnant’ fact, but it’s true, so who cares. I started walking again, and suddenly we stopped, as we nonchalantly joined a group which consisted of Dujun, Junhyung, Hyunseung, Dongwoon, Hyuna, Jiyoon, Gayoon, Min, and I didn’t pay attention to the other few unknown people.

I stayed behind Junnie, pondering in my thoughts… again.

I heard my name being called and looked up, “Why are you over there?” Hyuna asked, and suddenly all attention is on me. I hate this even more, when attention is on me, I DO NOT think straight.

I awkwardly giggled, and walked to where Hyuna was gesturing me to come.

She gently put her hand on my belly, “How’s baby?” She smiled making conversation with me as side conversations continued.

“Good,” I smiled politely back.

“I always wanted a baby!” She said giggling, leaning forward. That’s when I smelled the slight tinge of alcohol in her breath.

I suddenly felt a hand on my waist, and I automatically shivered, not on purpose.

“What’s wrong?” Dongwoon said, his look obviously confused.

“N-nothing,” I said looking away from his appealing, and worried eyes. I looked around me, self-consciously, around the huge complex, through the arch to the dance floors, from Junnie, who was currently talking; I didn’t pay attention to whom, then looked to the rest of the Cube artists, finally to the girls who I saw peeking at our group.

“I’m not feeling well,” I said excusing myself. I had to get away from there. My instincts just gave me warning to get away, as far as possible from these people. I did not like my feelings, I did not like when those girls stared, and I did not like attention. But whose the elephant in the room? Certainly not the skinny, perfect, single, un-pregnant girls who came to party, but the pregnant, huge, self-conscious girl who is currently taken by a national-if not worldwide- heartthrob.

I briskly walked wherever my legs took me, which was about 3 steps before I felt someone grab my arm, and of coarse, it would be Dongwoon.

”Let’s go home then?”

I shook my head, “Uh, I’ll have Junnie take me,”

“I’m holding the keys for hyung, he can just take us, I’ll help you out,” He tried to smile.

”Dongwoon-ah, it’s okay, I just want to go home,”

“Dujun! Hyung!” Dongwoon called over to his hyung.

“Dongwoon, I said it’s fine!” I said my voice suddenly loud, with an edge.

He looked at me with furrowed brows. “Let’s go,” he said trying to be calm and not start a scene, but at this point, I thoroughly lost it.

As he clutched my arm, I yanked it away. “No, Leave me alone!” I yelled.

“Why are you being like this?!” Dongwoon said, suddenly angry, which caught me off guard.

“Because,” I said defiantly, but at a loss of words, so what do I do when this happens? My brain just malfunctioned and I did the obvious relationship-breaker, to get me as far away from the person I wanted to be far away from, but at the same time, always with-how confusing.

“Whatsup,” Dujun said in an easygoing voice.

I turned straight up to him, grabbed his head and kissed him long and hard.

He swiftly pulled back, arms in the air, “I didn’t kiss her!” he said out loud turning to the growing audience.

“Arasseo?” I said concretely, avoiding Dongwoon’s eyes.

The only eyes I saw were of Junnie’s and Min’s before I ran… well walked as fast as I could out of the complex. Junine’s eyes were calm, but showed strong concern…even anger, while Min’s looked glassy, and worried.

I tried to block away the murmurs and voices as I looked down at my moving feet, taking myself to the cold, snowy scene outside. The only thing I heard before I opened the doors to the cold, was glass breaking.

I clutched myself, rubbing at my arms, trying to create heat. Yeah, I know I’m stupid for doing everything I just did, but I can’t help it. You try being pregnant, it’s a roller coaster ride that never ends. The only thing lit up where the street lamps, other than that, I walked on the cleared pavement, where there wasn’t any insane amounts of snow. I breathed out, and watched my breathe evaporate. I Focused on the simplicities of life, like the snow and how it melted, the way squeaky shoes sounded, and nature sounds. Like the soft pitter-patter of… shoes?

I sighed, my heart dropping, my anger rising again.

“Unnie,” I heard a soft voice say. I was surprised.

“Unnie,” Min said again, smiling at me. I didn’t know how exactly to respond, so I didn’t.

“It’s cold,” She said after awhile, “You might get sick!” She said stating the obvious. Of coarse I am. In this weather, I’m crazy. Now not only am I the pregnant elephant, dating a beast member, but a crazy, about to be sick pregnant elephant.

I’m sick of people worrying about me.

“Let’s go back inside, Ne?” She said sweetly. I let her take my arm as we slowly went back to the doors.

“It’s funny how insects make sounds isn’t it?” She said trying to lighten the mood. She tried imitating the cricket sounds and giggled, trying to make me smile.

“Ah, I stained my shirt,” She said looking down at a red stain. “Must be from the drinks. The drinks tasted good, don’t you agree Unnie?” She said then corrected herself, “Oh, well you must’ve not drank them, because your pregnant, duh,” She said hitting her forehead. “I think it would be nice to be pregnant, and have a little baby growing inside of your belly-“ She smiled.

“No,” I said simply and backed away from her, and the look she gave me made my guts upset. “How can you say that? You act as if pregnancy is the most simple thing in the world. It’s not, honey. It’s terrible, you have crazy mood swings, and you want to fight ever single flat belly you see. I wanted to, so badly, kill myself when I found out I’m pregnant, when I didn’t even plan to be, with someone I don’t remember, and probably don’t know. Wow, that’s my lovely fairy tale. But guess what, prince charming doesn’t exist, he NEVER exists, every guy just thinks about getting in every girl’s pants, they don’t care if their actions will take effect on anyone else. I don’t know why I even bothered with Dongwoon, he’s probably like the rest of every guy. Once this baby’s out of me, he’ll probably use my body and create another life in my stomach, that I’ll have to take care off, myself. Right?” I said furiously. Min’s eye watered again. My stomach felt like it dropped, and it’s as if the switch to my nerves were and I realized how cold it was inside.

“He’s not like that,” She sniffled. “He really cares for you and that baby,” She said simply.

“Of coarse you’d say that, Miss my-life-is-perfect, your always optimistic, it’s annoying!” I huffed, “Wake up! That’s not how life is, it’s crap out here, you can’t always think everything’s good. What do you really think guys want? Obviously one guy is a jerk enough to not care about whoever he has with and if he gets pregnant. How different can one guy be, compared to the rest of them? Do you know how naïve you are right now? I’m sick of it! I’m sick of you! I’m sick of Dongwoon! I’m sick of partying and seeing girl’s stare at me weird, and the snow, and my aching body. I’m sick of this life, and this baby!” I yelled turning and walking away.

It wasn’t even a minute yet when someone honked at me.

I stopped and looked up at the black sky. “What now?!” I yelled, and screamed in frustration.

I turned and looked at the familiar car.

“Get in.” Junnie said simply.

I stood there for awhile, and then got in. I didn’t care anymore. I’ve said everything and I want to rest my body, and hope to now wake up the next day.

“I want to go home.” I said simply, after I got in, buckled myself in and closed the door.

And I got what I want this time. Home was where we were heading.