One of the stage crew roughly hands a microphone to Onew, ordering him to apologize as I’m taken of stage.

“We’re sorry for his behavior,” I hear Onew, Taemin, and Minho speak to the fans, “You all will be given tickets for another concert...again we apologize. Perhaps by then, we’ll be whole again,” they bowed and with that the other three members walked offstage, joining me in the back.

            They stood around me, patted my back,

            “It’ll be alright Jonghyun...he’ll be back soon.”

            I’d broken down sobbing on stage when Minho filled in for Key’s part, I thought I could handle it, I was able to during practice this morning, but now I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t lie to myself that things were getting better because they weren’t. Angrily, I shot back,

            “Two months!” hot tears streamed down my face, “No one knows where-” my voice cracked and I held back the hot tears, “-where he is. No letter...no message...why haven’t we gotten any more information? What the hell happened that night? One of you had to be home!” I could feel myself shaking, my hands clenched into tight fists and I drop my head in my hands.

            “That’s just it, none of us were home,” Onew speaks.

            “And why not?” I look up at him sharply, “I was only gone for an hour, getting the groceries you wanted. What happened during that time that made you three have to leave?”

            “Manager-sshi called, that’s what, and he wanted to hold a meeting, Jonghyun, I’ve explained this to you-”

            “And you couldn’t take Kibum with you?!” I demand outraged.

            “Hyung!” Taemin and Minho grabbed me then, ripping me away from Lee Jinki when I’d seized him by his shirt front.

            “No, he was asleep by then, not to mention sick, I didn’t want to make his fever get worse-”

“Tch.” I scoff and his eyes narrow and darken.

“Look, you brat, don’t think his absence only affects you...it hurts us all.”

            “Brat?!” I fight Taemin and Minho’s grip, “Act like you care and do something to help find him! Damn it, Jinki, you’re the leader, this is your entire fault!”

            “My fault?! You can’t blame it on me, and what do you want me to do? We’ve got no leads, no idea who took him, absolutely nothing and the police are already on alert, but with nothing to work with, what do they do, what do we do? As of now, nothing, because there’s nothing we can do but wait for another message,” his voice is still calm, too calm for my liking, and then the cold steel tone comes, “And it’s Jinki-hyung. I’m older, you treat me with respect no matter what the circumstance is, understand, dongsaeng?” he steps towards me and holds a finger at my chest.

            Taemin and Minho stare at Onew, having never seen the leader like this, and I take advantage of their distraction and break free, shoving them back and Onew away before swerving by the other backstage crew, walking down some metal steps and out into the