SUMMARY:

Minho is tired of kids letting their dogs poop on his lawn and he plans to get revenge.

*Covers face. I can't believe I wrote this. Enjoy? *Grins awkwardly.

31 Days Of Halloween (Stray Kids):  October 2023

Story Six:

Oh, Poop

-

  "Oh, no he didn't," Minho seethed.  Only his eyes were visible through blinds.  Some kids had let his dog crap on his law three- not one- three times this week and he just stood there and let it happen.  "That... is... it."  He went to his kitchen, pulled out his cauldron and began mixing ingredients.

-

  Changbin was the pumpkin man, as a little girl once called him (not because he did anything with them, but because the magical world where they came from had made it possible for certain types of magical vegetation to evolve into sentient beings).  He had arrived a few minutes earlier and delivered the Radtford Root that Minho needed for his potion.  "Can't you just... tell him to stop?  Or give him a poop bag.  Tell him to buy poop bags.  Threaten to tell his parents?  Anything but this?"
  "No."
  "You'll have to decorate your yard for Halloween to draw the kids in and buy candy to give it out."
  He flapped his hands.  "I'm... ma-king candy.  Only the ones who live around here will be drawn to my yard and once they eat the candy my sentient plants will track them and crap all over their lawn for a year.  All... over... it.  They'll be so sick of poop that they'll hate to even have a bodily function."
  Changbin slowly blew out a breath.  "Wow.  You seriously need to calm down.  Don't you think that's going a little too far?"
  "No.  If you don't like it you can such a-."

-

  Anyways," Chan said.  "Changbin tells me you're planning to bombard a bunch of kids' yards with a naughty spell?"
  "Naught?  What are we five," Minho said.  "I do what I want.  It wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't stepped in it.  I hate dogs, I hate kids and I hate the combination on my lawn.  The disrespect."  He opened the door wider.  "Tea?"
  "Sure."  Coming in he said, "Isn't there any way I can talk you out of it?"
  "Absolutely not.  An entire year.  My plants will live in their yard and they'll never figure it out."
  Jeongin, in his fox form, sniffed the plants by Minho's front door.  They smelled like plums.  He looked way up as the door opened.
  "What brings you here, Innie?"  Minho had a purple robe on and was that a single mark and smoke on the left elbow?"
  "Don't say anything.  Creating these tracking candies was harder than I thought."
  He tipped.
  "What?  I forgot something.  What is it?"
  He shifted to human and stood up.  "You were supposed to take me on a flying lesson today.  Did you really forget?"
  "I was supposed to do that, wasn't I?"  He huffed so hard his cheeks puffed out.  He scratched his scalp and ruffled his bangs.  "C-Come in.  Come in."  He opened the door completely.
  Jeongin went in and coughed a little.  "Why aren't you venting the house?"  He opened a window and used a dishtowel to stir the cauldron smoke out."
  "Innie, no."

-

  "I'm really sorry," Jeongin said.
  Minho's plants had crapped all over his yard and since it was his fault, guess who had to clean it up.
  "I don't care how sorry you are.  My house absorbs my magic like a buffer.  That includes the smoke too.  So it doesn't make things like this happen and allows the true intention of it to be realized when the time is right.
  He used a shovel to scoop more up and put it in the trash bag.  At least it was small.  "I know.  I know."
  "And after this, you'll never do it again.  After twenty minutes take a break and come inside for some water and food."  He left him on his own.
  So... no flying lessons for the day.  Great.

-

  Perfect replicas of basic candies laying cooling before him.  Minho grinned, then cackled like the witch he was.  If it were a movie lightning would've struck the haunted tree out back.

-

  Seungmin landed his broom and ascended the three steps to Minho's porch.  When the door opened he said, "I want in."
  They both grinned.

-

  "Candy, get your candy," Minho called.
  He'd decorated his house with illusions - a dragon, smoke in the windows, fog on the ground, shadows moving on the ground and behind trees.  And random screams and ghoulish laughs.
  "I only came to make sure everyone is safe," Changbin said.  He handed candy from the pile he'd bought at the store to a little pirate princess with bright yellow braided pigtails (obviously part of the costume).
  "And I came to keep you company," Felix said.  He was latched onto his arm, paranoid of the moving shadows.
  "You know they're not real, right?"
  "I know."  He gulped.
  Chan sighed and said, "And I came to make sure no one dies or lights anyone on fire.  He'd hidden the bucket of charmed candy but he didn't think it'd stay hidden.  Or that Minho hadn't made more and snuck it into the save candies.
  Hyunjin ran by and a smoking whoosh started.  Then a pop and a whistle, the fireworks were drawing more people in.
  Minho grinned and rubbed his hands together.  He nodded to Seungmin and walked to Chan.  "Why'd you take my candy away?  I know it was you.  They were right here."  He pointed to the table.
  Seungmin grinned and purple stars blinked around his hands as he materialized a hidden bucket.  He whispered, "Double Double Toil and Trouble.  Tresspasses begets the bet.  Equalize the disrespect.  An eye for an eye.  Now send out Minho Hyung's intention net.  So mote it be."  A silver net only he could see spread forth, split in three directions, and shot off.  All of the kids who'd allow their pets to do their business on Minho Hyung's lawn would be drawn to this yard.  They'd get this candy and they'd eat it.  The plants would follow them home, imbed themselves into their lawn, and let the poo-punishment begin.

-

  Minho had set up a hammock and he used binoculars to observe the chaos he'd created.  He laughed and said, "One week of crap and they're done scratching their heads.  Now, Dad from yard one is jumping up and down.  Mom's from houses two and three, the ones having an affair with each other have slipped in it."  He cackled.
  Felix was standing on the porch, hugging of of the beams and looking uncomfortable.
  "I'm embarrassed to know you," Changbin said.
  "So sue me."
  Seugmin came back on his broom and hovered near him.  "Did I miss anything interesting?  Here."  He handed him a bag of fresh herbs.  "Who are you punishing this time?  The cheating Moms?"
  What- no.  I don't care about them... so long as they stay off my lawn.  I need to create a nutrient for my sentient plants.  If they stay away from my yard to long they'll die."
  "So you have to put that in the other people's yards," Changbin asked.
  "Wait," Felix said.  "Want that make the plants in their yard sentient?"  He looked at Minho, then Seugnmin.  "Uh, oh.  I'm telling Channie Hyung."
  Minho struggled to get out of the hammock.  "Get him, Seugmin."
  Felix had already dialed Chan's number.  He yelled and ran.

ENDING NOTES:

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 ~ Demitria_Teague (Author)

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