"Soobin can you come out for a second?" He hears his grandma's voice.

He sighs before getting up from his comfortable position on his window sill to open the door. He is once met by his grandma's concerned face. "Yes grandma?"

"Oh dear, are you sure you're okay? You've been in your room for days, I'm really worried about you." His grandma asks, concern laced in her voice.

Soobin tries to smile at her before answering, "Don't worry grandma, I'm completely fine. Just not in the mood to come outside that's all."

His grandma slightly narrows her eyes at him, probably contemplating whether he is telling the truth or lying.

Soobin slightly gulps, not really wanting to be caught lying because he doesn't really know what to tell her if she ever finds out. He's already used to dealing with his feelings on his own anyways.

"Alright dear. Just tell me if you need anything okay?" She sighs, knowing that she can't force the truth out of her grandson.

"Okay grandma, thank you." Soobin replies and hugs his grandma, actually feeling guilty about lying to her because he really can't help it.

His grandma is the first one to break the hug, "I'll be at the garden okay?".

Soobin nods at her and she throws him a smile before making her way downstairs.

He lets out a sigh before closing the door and he's once again met by silence, just him and his room.

He throws himself on his bed, dangling his head at the edge of the bed until he feels all his blood rushing to his head.

It's been a week since he arrived at the village and five days since the gathering that he was invited to and he slowly feels himself getting back to his old habits of doing nothing. He literally just lies on his bed the whole day, talking to Beomgyu and sometimes, trying to read a book on his bookshelf that he's not interested in.

He finds himself scrolling through his social media accounts, seeing the people who he used to go to school with living the best time of their lives --- enjoying the summer break, partying and spending time with their group of friends.

Soobin only had Beomgyu so he can't say that he's envious of them because he never experienced it and besides, he'd pick playing video games with Beomgyu over partying because socializing is not his thing like at all. He sometimes wonders if Beomgyu doesn't get tired of spending his time with him because Beomgyu's a sweetheart and can be friends with whoever he wants yet he still chose Soobin. His heart warms at the thought.

God, he misses his best friend terribly.

He hears a light ding coming from his phone and sees a message from Yeonjun asking him if he wants to hangout again tomorrow but he's already too tired just by thinking about it so he just left him on read.

Pushing good people away is really one of his specialty, note the sarcasm. Yeonjun's not that bad and Soobin's actually looking forward to meeting him and the boys again but he can't find the strength to reply back to him.

Ever since that night, Soobin just finds himself not being able to fall asleep like at all. He was pretty tired from carrying Yeoreum home and taking care of her but why on earth couldn't he fall asleep?

He had to lie to Beomgyu about his messed up sleeping pattern again and that he may or may not open the bottle of sleeping pills again to help him fall asleep.

His dark circles and tired eyes are an extreme giveaway but thankfully, he manages to lie smoothly to Beomgyu, something he had never done before. Phew.

He actually wanted to tell Beom