Napakagat ka ng kuko, unannounced kasing dinaanan ka ni Jeno sa PUP. After ka nyang masundo sinunod naman nya ang iba nyo pang kaibigan.

 

You hang out sa UPTC, along with Giselle, Jaemin and Renjun who are enrolled sa UST and Ateneo. Nagkuwentuhan, kumain, nagbabad sa timezone at nagkaraoke just like what you guys always do nung high school. You can’t deny namimiss mo rin ang friends mo. Madalang na kayo magkita dahil lahat kayo ay on your final year na, graduating students.

 

Binabaybay nyo na yung daan papunta sa bahay mo. Nakapag-usap na rin kayo ni Jeno kanina simula nung naiwan na kayong dalawa since nauna nyang ihatid pauwi ang mga mokong at si Gis.

 

Naalala mong icheck yung phone mo but napakunot lalo ang noo mo when you see there’s no notification na galing sa kanya.

 

“Hey, you seem busy sa phone mo...”

 

“I-I’m sorry..”

 

Nahiya ka naman since he went all the way sa school mo just pick you up and hangout with your other friends. Tinago mo na ulit yung phone mo right after you sent a direct message to someone and closed your instagram app.

 

“It’s fine.. anyway, don’t you miss me?”

 

Kinindatan ka nito. He is still the same guy during high school, thinking he can get anyone because of how good he looks. Although he is annoying, he sure knows how to treat you well and kaya naman you’re still friends with him.

 

“Jeno... keep your eyes on the road, we don’t want to cause any accident.”

 

“Okay, Ms. Serious.. but I am a good driver kaya lagi kaming nagroroad trip ng barkada ko when I was in States. “

 

He suddenly and playfully sped up too much kaya napakapit ka sa seatbelt mo.

 

“Jeno!”

 

“I know, I know haha I’m just kidding Romi!”

 

Umiling ka na lang still not convinced he improved at driving. You quietly watched yung scenery, ang ganda rin talaga paggabi. Di mo mapaliwanag yung nararamdaman mo when Jeno told you to move back a bit at inopen yung windows and roof of his car. Napatingin ka sa kanya at nginitian ka lang nya.

 

Mas malinaw mong nakita ang labas, tumawa ka when the wind hits your face wala ka na pakialam kahit pa gulo-gulo na yung buhok mo. Tinaas mo yung kamay mo para mas dama mo yung hangin nung dahan-dahang binilisan niya kaunti ang pagpapatakbo. Damn, Jeno still knows you and alam nyang gusto mo yung mga ganitong bagay.

 

Yung iba’t ibang liwanag na nanggaling sa bahay, poste ng ilaw at mga sasakyan dito sa syudad, they create a nostalgic feel at night. Kaya naman you can’t help but wish that someday you’ll see these city lights with Winter instead.

 

Maya-maya lang nakarating na kayo sa bahay mo.

 

“Thanks Jeno!”

 

“No, thank you Romi.. namiss kita....”

 

He held your hand and smiled. You suddenly felt an urge na yakapin sya so you did.

 

“Bolero but I miss you too!”

 

—

 

You saw Winter na nakatulog sa library while waiting for you na naman.

 

Sinandal mo rin sa table ang pisngi mo to look at her closely. Hindi ka naman creepy di ba?

 

Watching her sleep? Medyo gusto mo sya pagtripan so pinipindot mo ang ilong nya but she only groans at hindi talaga dumidilat.

 

You can’t help but notice na lalo yata siyang nagiging cute sa paningin mo. It doesn’t really help din na sobra syang enjoy kasama. You feel so you, I mean no pressure kung paano ka kikilos around her.

 

Magaan lang sa pakiramdam.

 

Sa sobrang komportable mo, kahit ikaw naguguluhan, nasa linya pa rin ba ng friendship o hindi na?

 

You watched her snore lightly gusto mong tumawa but you stopped yourself dahil baka mapagalitan kayo ng librarian. Kaya you settled na lang ulit sa panonood sa kanya, hindi mo maatim na gisingin na sya o buskahin ulit while looking so innocent and peaceful.

 

Isa lang ang sigurado ka, you never want her to slip away.

 

Pinatong mo yung kaliwang kamay mo filing the spaces between her fingers sa right hand nya nasa taas din ng mesa.

 

Sana, pagnalaman mo na yung sagot, nandyan pa rin ang kamay nya para kapag sigurado ka na hahawakan mo na lang ito ng mahigpit at hindi na papakawalan.

 

—

 

 

You can’t tolerate this anymore, magalmost 3 weeks na kayong hindi nagkikita ni Winter. She hasn’t seen a single direct message that you sent her sa instagram.

 

Ang lalim na ng eyebags mo kakahintay na magreply sya sayo. Sinira na ni Winter ang schedule ng beauty rest mo.

 

My god, pinagmukha ka pa nyang tanga kakahintay o kakahanap sa kanya after your dance competition. She did not even watch you, kahit pa nagsasayaw ka alam mong makikta’t makikita mo sya sa crowd but then wala talaga. You need her that day, you badly need to see her. You were anxious, too anxious that you almost slip during one of your dance routines if not for your team captain Yeji reminding you to focus at mag-ingat, magiging sanhi ka pa yata ng pagkatalo nyo.

 

You wanted no one else aside from Winter to celebrate this win. This is your last dance competition sa college dahil gagraduate ka na and gusto mo syang makasama kasi she’s been there with you all these years. She was so patient, always supporting you sa practices mo and watching your contests. Kahit hindi nya sabihin or magdahilan lang syang coincidence lang na napapadaan sya sa practice room nyo, you knew it was not really the case, she isn’t as slick as she thought she is.

 

She’s the type of person na suot-suot ang puso nya sa manggas ng damit nya. Kaya nga maingat ka, you can’t afford to break someone as fragile as her and you never really intended to do so.

 

Kaya nga you decided na this is also the right time to answer her.

 

To give your answer sa napakatagal na nya ng tanong, sasabihin mo na sana but she decided na indiyanin ka!

 

You’re going to tell her your truth pero paano naman kung hindi mo sya mahagilap.

 

Monday, her class ends earlier than yours kaya eto ka taking long strides pababa sa first floor. Nagdadasal na sana maabutan sya, ayaw mo na kasing ipagpabukas pa. Kasi sobrang suspucious, naiintindihan mo naman yung absences nya when she was sick but sabi ni Ningning nagmamadali raw laging umuwi si Winter akala nila kagaya ng dati hinihintay ka nitong matapos sa dance practices mo.

 

You finally get your answer when you saw her sa may dome sa 1st floor, assisting a girl na mukha yatang mas bata sa kanya, sa mga dala-dala nitong gamit.

 

“Winter!”

 

Nataranta ka dahil nakita mong paalis na silang dalawa. Nagulat pang lumingon sayo ang tinawag mo na para bang she’s not expecting to see you.

 

“Te Winter, sunod ka na lang ha.”

 

Natuod ka when you saw the girl tugged Winter’s sleeves pababa at inilapit ang mukha nito sa kanya.

 

What? Are they together?

 

Nakapunta na pala sa pwesto mo si Winter at ikaw hindi pa rin naintindihan ang mga nangyayari.

 

“Ate Rina?”

 

You suddenly don’t know where to start, napalunok ka. Bakit? Paano?

 

“Sino yon?”

 

Sa dami ng gusto mong itanong isa lang ang nabitawan mo. Ang focus mo diba is to know where she’d een for the past weeks aside don sa nagkasakit sya.

 

Is she with that girl during those times? Damn, sobrang bilis naman if... if they were together.

 

“No uhh never mind that.. Gusto lang sana kitang makausap kahit saglit, I did not know na you’re super busy pala...”

 

“Hindi ba nag-uusap na tayo? You can tell me na rito.”

 

“Can we talk somewhere private?”

 

“But I promised Lami kasi na sasa—“

 

“I won’t take much of your time, I promise.”

 

Nakita naman nyang pursigido ka so she gave in but not without looking back sa direksyon kung saan tumungo yung babae nyang kasama kanina.

 

Nakahanap din kayo ng vacant na classroom to talk to. Nakatayo ka while she sits sa isa mga armchair ng room.

 

“Ano bang gusto mong pag-usapan?”

 

May aircon ba yang baga nya? Ang lamig ng pagkakatanong nya sa iyo.

 

“I.. I’m just wondering where have you been in the past three weeks?”

 

You saw her na napatawa ng mahina at napailing na para bang ang ridiculous ng question mo.

 

“Yun lang ba? I was busy, I had to review and sinasamahan ko rin kasi si Lami sa acting classes nya.”

 

So, talagang kasama pala nya yong babaeng yon buong linggo! Ang bilis ka naman nyang palitan. You internally scoffed, what the hell?!

 

“Kaya pala you weren’t able na pumunta sa dance practice room.”

 

“Kailangan pa ba?”

 

“Ha?”

 

What is she saying?! Of course yes, kasi hinihintay mo syang puntahan ka at sabayan ka umuwi tulad ng lagi nyong gawi.

 

You need her beside you.

 

“Kailangan pa ba? Sabi ng dance team, may sumundo na raw sayo.”

 

“Ah yes... uhm si Jeno yon, high school friend ko.”

 

Technically, tama ka naman. She doesn’t need to know naman na magex kayo ni Jeno pero hindi ka pa rin makatingin ng diretso sa mata nya. Tsaka that was one time, hindi ka naman na nya sinundo pa ulit.

 

“Ate Rina, isn’t he your ex?”

 

!

 

“Saan mo nalaman yan?”

 

“Doesn’t matter, so nagkabalikan na kayong dalawa?”

 

Hindi ka agad nakasagot. Si Winter ba talaga itong kausap mo?

 

“Wha—“

 

“Congrats!”

 

Hindi mo gusto yung tono nya, bakit ba hindi ka nya pinapatapos sa sasabihin mo.

 

“Nagkabalikan? Hindi ah, just where did you hear those things?”

 

“Talaga? Well, the two of you should... bagay kayo, highschool sweethearts... visual couple..”

 

Nagpantig yung tenga mo, bakit ka ba nya pinagtutulukan?

Siguro, siguro sila na talaga nung Bambi na yon!

 

“Ahh para kayo nung Bambini na kasama mo kanina. Bagay din kayong dalawa.”

 

“Bambi? Si Lami?”

 

“Sya nga basta! Winter naman, be very honest with me, seryoso ka ba talaga sa akin? Three weeks kang hindi nagparamdam, hindi mo alam how worried I was tapos yon pala sa tatlong linggong yon pinalitan mo na ako agad!”

 

“Pinalitan? Wala naman akong ginagawa.”

 

“Don’t deny it! Hahalikan ka ba nya sa pisngi kung wala lang?!”

 

Nakita mong kunot na kunot ang noo nito pero may pilyang ngiti na sumilay sa labi nya. Hindi ito magpapatalo.

 

“Eh kaysa naman sa iyo na walang ibang ginawa kundi paglaruan ako for 2 years!”

 

Ano raw?

 

“Rina, hindi na ko bata just tell me right to my face na hindi mo ko kahit kailan magugustuhan.”

 

“What are you saying? Winter saan nangga—“

 

“Rina, I prefer na diretsahin mo ko! Bakit hindi mo na lang sabihin you haven’t moved on sa napakaperpekto mong ex kaya ayaw mo kong sagutin?!”

 

This is the first time na tinaasan ka niya ng boses, you flinched.

 

“Sabihin mo na lang sa akin, kung gaano mo ko hindi kagusto para hindi naman ako nagmumukhang tangang pinaghihintay mo. Kasi nga tanga nga ko eh, maghihintay ako kahit hindi mo pa sabihin!”

 

“Winter! Hindi kita pinagmumukhang tanga! Ikaw nga itong bigla na lang nawawala tapos may nilalandi na palang iba.”

 

Nagulat ka nung tumayo na rin ito at nanlilisik ang mga matang tinitigan ka.

 

“Bawiin mo yang sinabi mo.”

 

“That Lami girl, kayo na ba?”

 

Nung hindi sya makasagot, sinampal mo sya.

 

“ you! See? And for your information paano ko naman sasabihin na hindi kita gusto, when I ing like you too much! I like you, Winter!”

 

Dinuro-duro mo sya sa dibdib when she was about to say something kasi hindi ka pa tapos.

 

“Yung sinasabi mong perpekto kong ex, I chose you over him! I chose you (taray pokemon charot) ikaw yung pinili ko! Aaminin ko na sayo eh but tsaka mo naisipang mawala na parang bula. Kahit sa messages ko sayo sa insta hindi mo man lang binabasa o nirereplyan.”

 

Huminga ka ng malalim, ang dami mo kasing kinimkim nung tatlong linggo na yon, yung pagkamiss, pag-aalala at pagiging needy mo sa kanya.

 

“Kasi nga busy ka pala dyan sa pinalit mo, grabe ka it only took you three weeks para lang... para lang palitan ako?”

 

Pinakawalan mo na yung kanina mo pang pinipigilan na pag-iyak. How dare she do this to you?

 

Nung hahawakan ka nito sa kamay, agad kang dumistansya kinuha yung nakita mo blackboard eraser at binato sya.

 

“Tangina mo, Winter!”

 

Sapul sa pisngi, mabuti nga yon kasi gusto mo talaga burahin yang pagmumukha nya! Magsama sila ng bagong kalandian nya.

 

—

 

Karina’s direct messages to Winter 🙈🙊

 

Hey, Win I guess di ako makakasabay today :((

There’s an old friend who dropped by and invited me for dinner. Please text me kapag pauwi and nakauwi ka na, okay? Ingat ka!

 

Winter?

 

Katatapos ko lang maghang out kasama yung mga hs friends ko. Nakauwi ka na ba? Don’t tell me naglaro ka na naman instead of going home early?!

 

Winter, saan ka?

 

Win, maaga natapos practice namin! Puntahan kita, saan ka?

 

Di ka ba sasabay pauwi? Kain tayo ng fishball, namiss ko magkwek kwek at kikiam!

 

It’s been a week. Are you okay?

 

I went to your department, maaga ka raw umuwi at mukhang nagmamadali. Is there a problem? Okay ka lang ba?

 

You’re still not replying? You haven’t read any of my messages pa rin.. please reply once nabasa mo na ang mga ito ha...

 

May sakit ka raw? Pagaling ka and tell me if you need anything.

 

Magaling ka na ba? Do you perhaps need someone to take care of you?

Ah no, nevermind that.. please take a rest ng maayos para gumaling ka agad...

 

Dumaan ako sa room nyo but looks like maaga kayo nagdismiss, ibang class na yung nandoon. Okay ka na ba?

 

Not to be annoying pero why haven’t you been dropping by sa practice room? Are you still not okay? If yes, take your time sa pagpapahinga.

 

Ohh, I’ve heard exams nyo na raw. Sorry but since exam week nyo na pala, good luck! Naniniwala ako sa pilosopo skills mo hahaha aespaiting!

 

I think busy ka mag-aral kasi you haven’t seen my messages to you since last last week. Aral well and please take care of yourself hmm?

 

Ilang days na lang dance compe na namin! Sorry di kita namessage dito sa instagram nung mga nakaraang araw, sobrang higpit kasi sa praktis at nakakapagod kaya kahit pag-uwi di na rin ako makaonline.

 

Hi! Sobrang busy nyo rin siguro kaya di ka makaraan sa dance club. Hmm okay lang naman pero hindi ka ba makakasilip kahit sandali? :((

 

Hayyy... I reallly.... uhmm basta keep safe okay?

 

I miss you, Winter.

 

I really miss you.

 

Last practice namin today, kwek-kwek tayo? 🥺

 

After ng competition, if you aren’t busy can we eat out sa labas? This time libre ko, Win! Di ka tumatanggi sa libre diba? Asahan ko yan. Cheer mo ko, I mean kami ng dance team ha? And oh, please see me before magstart ang contest, I just really need to see you kahit saglit lang. Please? 🥺🥺

 

==

 

Note: I was supposed to do something different kaso di ko natapos so I settled na lang na magud hahahahhuhuhuhu thank you sa 100 subs and pangcheer na rin para mamaya bcs im not sure kung mgging active aq 😭😭😭😭 payting!! 
 

sa mga nagsabing angst to henlo 🤡🤡 bket ba wla kau tiwala kay Karina 😔😔😔