Kahit Pa 3/3 😉

 

 

Dahil kailangan ka, kailangang pakita natin tayo'y iba
At kahit pa hindi papipigil sa mundo
At sa umagang darating, lahat ay aking kakayanin

 

 

Unang gabi ninyo sa bahay nila, simula ng dumating ang mga lalaki ng pamilya hindi ka na nakahinga. Maingat ka sa bawat kilos mo feeling mo isang maling biro mo may matatapakan kang bomba sa ibaba.

 

“Excuse me lang po...”

 

Paalam mo, need mo talaga magcr break para huminga. Ayon sa mga narinig mo by weekend or next week pupunta raw kayo sa bahay ng lola nina Karina at doon kayo magstay for another week kaya huwag nyo na raw alisin sa bagahe ang mga damit ninyo.

 

Nagulat ka when someone suddenly pushed you sa loob magmumura ka na sana when you saw the culprit.

 

“Stop being nervous baby...”

 

She kissed you, probably to help you overcome your anxiety. She really knows what to do, to calm you down.

 

You sighed in relief, as long as she’s here with you, you can do anything.

 

Biglang pumasok sa isip mong lumuhod na kaya at tanungin na sya.

 

Gusto mo na syang yayain magpakasal ngayon din. Kaso nasa bathroom kayo, taena apakaromantic non!

 

Ghad, what did you do to deserve someone like Karina?

 

Grabe, ilang haplos lang sa buhok mo you can feel your breathing starting to go back to normal.

 

“Baby, please don’t be too scared. My family is nice and you’re doing so well. Mom and my sisters liked you so much.”

 

Her dad looks so difficult to impress.

 

“Am I really doing well?”

 

“Yes, parang di mo narinig natatawa sila because of your humor tsaka super sarap daw nung niluto mo kanina.”

 

“Hmmm...”

 

“Ghad, I missed you so much kahit malapit lang tayo sa isa’t isa.”

 

“Baka mahuli tayo, Rina...”

 

“But I still want to kiss you....”

 

Bigla ka namang may naalala.

 

“Oohhh, didn’t we have a bet earlier?”

 

She pushed you away nung marealize nyang tama ka.

 

“Arrghhh, oo nga pala! But it’s your fault gusto ko lang pakalmahin ka, ang daya-daya naman.”

 

“Nah ah, umamin ka na lang you can’t resist me.”

 

She pouted, she’s really damn competitive and you bet it runs in the family.

 

“No, unfair! Dapat not counted ito eh.”

 

“Wag asar-talo, prepare ka na lang because my wish is not that easy to grant.”

 

Kinindatan mo ito, of course hindi yon mahirap wish mo lang naman na pakasalan mo sya. But again, you’ll do it some other time kaya mag-iisip ka pa ng ibang hiling.

 

“Daya talaga!”

 

“Bahala ka na dyan, isipin mo muna paano tayo lalabas ng cr na di mahuhuli.”

 

“Let’s just think about it later busy naman sila manood ng Ang Probinsyano, I doubt mapapansin nilang wala tayong dalawa.”

 

“Hindi ba kabilin-bilinan mo sa akin, na wag ako gaggawa ng kalokohan ito sa bahay nyo. Look who is the naughty one?”

 

“Your fault, ginalingan mo kasi masyado ang pagpapaimpress sa family ko.”

 

“Anong konek non?”

 

She put her arms on your shoulder to pull you closer.

 

“It makes me fall for you a little bit harder ulit. To be honest din, I’m getting jealous na all of your attention ay napupunta sa family ko. How about me?”

 

“Rina...”

 

“I’m your jowa kaya you still need to impress me. I suggest you do that by giving me my goodnight kisses now hanggang mamaya.”

 

How can you say no to that? Si Winter ka lang naman, marupok na marupok kay Karina.

 

—-

 

Nakatambay ka sa may terrace kasi busy na busy ang jowa mo at pamilya nya sa paggreet sa kamag-anakan nila. Nandito na kayo sa mansyon ng lolo’t lola nya. 

 

Yayamanin din talaga tong jowaers mo eh.

 

Napakilala ka naman na at syempre di maiiwasang maout of place ka so you decided na magpahangin na lang.

 

Bumuntong-hininga, you will be here for a week, makakakaya mo pa kaya?

 

“Hi!”

 

Napalingon ka sa gilid mo when you felt someone joined you sa pagpapalipas-oras.

 

“Uh hi, Giselle right?”

 

“Woah, matandain ka ha... ikaw, yung friend ni Kar?”

 

“Yes, Winter nga pala!”

 

Inabot mo ang kamay mo na marahan din nitong kinuha.

 

“Nice to meet you. How’s your stay here so far? Sana di ka nanlulula sa dami namin kasi may mga darating pangbisita sa mga susunod na araw.”

 

“Okay naman, I did enjoy spending time with Rina and her family.”

 

“That’s good to hear, akala ko kaya ka nandito sa labas dahil nararamihan ka sa amin.”

 

“It’s true medyo crowded nga but ganoon naman pagfamily celebrations. Ikaw pansin ko lang you don’t mingle with a lot of them? You did greet us earlier pero di na kita ulit nakita after that.”

 

“Oohh... I guess Kar hasn’t told you then.”

 

Nakita mong sumandal to sa railing ng balcony kung saan nakapatong ang iniinom mong juice.

 

“I am biual.”

 

“And?”

 

Sure you are surprised because she doesn’t seem like it. But who are you to judge someone’s uality easily?

 

“Wow... glad you’re not homophobic. Well, you see our family is quite conservative, devout catholic at alam mo na dahil puro mamilitar, strikto. I was actually kicked out by my father. Nakita mo yung nakagreen na kausap ng dad ni Kar, that’s my dad. I only have been talking to my mom secretly ever since nung napalayas ako.”

 

This is too much to take in pero you urged her to continue. Natahimik ka lang sa gilid.

 

“My mom bought me tickets so my kuya taeyong can pick me up sa States and stay with him for awhile.”

 

“Sorry to hear that, I did not know na—“

 

“It’s fine, kababalik ko lang since Lola wanted me back. But y’know the men in the family still can’t accept us. Oo nga pala, kuya taeyong is another cousin of ours, bakla sya and he was disowned by my tito. You don’t know what they did to him especially when he refused na magmilitar gaya ng ibang lalaki sa pamilya. Bale sa apat magkakapatid, tatay lang ni Kar ang may normal na family.”

 

“Hmmm?”

 

“Lahat ng anak nya puro straight.”

 

She sips from her drink bago magsalita ulit.

 

“Ibig kong sabihin, tito Jeric has kuya Taeyong, my father has her biual daughter and tita kate has Jeongyeon and Jeonghan. Ate jeongie is in Japan right now kasama ng girlfriend nyang singer and kuya Jeonghan is with his partner Seungcheol. You see lahat ng kaclose ko wala dito, kaya ayon I’m mostly at my room lang. Hindi naman lahat ng cousin ko homophobic, it’s just that maingat kami since di sila pwede makita nina tito na nakikipag-usap sa amin.”

 

“I didn’t know all that, must have been so tough para sa inyo.”

 

“Well, yeah lalo na kina kuya, ikaw ba naman palibutan ng puro mga sundalo mong tito at lolo. But tita kate loves us too much, kaya ate and kuya jeongie weren’t kicked out nor disowned kagaya namin ni kuya taeyong. But they preferred to stay away from this family in the meantime, kasi kita mo naman they haven’t fully accepted us. Kaya para wala na lang gulo we rarely attend this family event.”

 

“Thank you for telling me about that. I know it’s not easy for you and sa iba mo pang pinsan. No one deserves to be put into that kind of situation.”

 

“Alam mo yon I really got tired of hiding so after I graduated college umamin na ko. If not for lola baka hindi na ko bumalik gaya ni Kuya Taeyong. Close naman ako actually kay Kar dati plus kina ate but then tito was strict, I bet he warned Rina about hanging out with me.”

 

“Seryoso?”

 

“It’s just a guess but I think yung mga tito ko ay capable na gawin yon. I could not even talk to my younger sister because of what happened.”

 

“I can’t imagine how hard it was for you.”

 

“Hayy enough about me na nga, ikaw what made you decide na sumama rito?”

 

“Busy kasi yung family ko this year. Kaya nung inalok ako ni Rina, instead na mabulok ako mag-isa sa dorm pumayag na ko. Bunso ako sa magkakakpatid kaya I’m well aware na they love me too much. May apat akong ate at isang kuya.”

 

“Ang dami nyo pala!”

 

“Yeah, marami nga kami. Kakakasal lang ng Kuya CJ ko last last year. He was so excited na magpakasal. Glad na yung mga ate ko supported him kasi sorry medyo ang funny lang nung first time na my kuya was interested na magpropose against sina ate eh. But thank ghad naman they realized na malaki na kaming mga bunso nila so they let kuya.”

 

“That’s good to hear, by the way are you single?”

 

Shoot, type ka ba nitong pinsan ni Karina? Hala ka! Oh no...

 

“Uhh ano...”

 

“Well?”

 

Naghihintay talaga sya sa sagot mo. Omaygad, Winter! Si Karina lang mahal mo, huhuhu sorry Gi, patay na patay ka na sa pinsan nya.

 

“Ano kasi single pero I had my eyes on someone... at ano uhmm maganda ka naman kaso—“

 

“Hahahaha.. I get it, I figured you had your eyes on someone nga talaga.”

 

She looked at you na may glint ng pagkapilya sa mga mata, does she know? Fck! Naamoy ka ba nya? Di ka nga umamin na bi ka rin eh!

 

“I am just kidding, Winter. You are such a cutie, alam mo yon?”

 

She pinched your cheeks.

 

“Huh?”

 

“But I warned you already... please be careful.”

 

She hugged you for a bit, dang for what? Alam nya ba? Pero maingat kayo ni Karina, ni hindi mo pa nga nalalapitan ulit ang jowa mo.

 

“Win?”

 

Giselle immediately let go of you. Nagpalipat-lipat ang tingin sa inyong dalawa ni Gi ng bagong dating, probably wondering bakit sobrang lapit nyo sa isa’t isa.

 

“Rina...”

 

Nakita mong tumango lang magpinsan bilang pagbati. Giselle excused herself na babalik na sa kwarto nya.

 

“What was that?”

 

“Ang?”

 

“Why is she hugging you? 

 

“Ano lang...”

 

“Bakit ka niyayakap ng pinsan ko?”

 

You can see she’s getting annoyed dahil hindi ka makasagot.

 

“Kanina pa kita hinahanap, you’re not answering your phone. Masyado ka bang nalibang kay Giselle?”

 

“She kept me company nakakahiya naman na—“

 

“Don’t be too close to her! Stick to me, okay?”

 

Nakasimangot pa rin pero she reached for you hand and intertwined it, sinandal ang sarili nya sayo while the both of you stayed sa balcony nila. 

 

“I miss you, baby...”

 

Bulong nya sa iyo, that goes the same for you ang hirap kayang magtago especially ngayong marami kang nalaman about her family. Kaya pala ganoon sya nung una sayo, always wary and not letting her guards down. 

 

Sa totoo lang, you don’t know what to do anymore ngayong ganito pala ang sitwasyon.

 

“I miss you too, jagi.”

 

—

 

 

Akala mo malalang problema na yung di kayo magkasama sa kwarto dito sa mansyon ng grandparents nya, tatlong araw na simula nung gabing ninakaw siya ng mga pinsan nya mula sa iyo at pinilit na magkakaroom sila and probably until sa end ng celebration you will not have an alone time with her.

 

Buti na lang Giselle was there to pick you as a roommate.

 

Pero eto pala ang mas mahirap, may dumating na bisitang akala mo santo kung sambahin ng pamilya nina Karina.

 

Not exaggerating, kumbaga sa VIP treatment ganon na ganon! Just who is this guy? Hindi pa nakatulong na nilapitan nito ang jowa mo who enthusiastically talked to him. 

 

Gosh, she’s playfully hitting his arms. Kunsabagay kahawig nung asungot yung clown na kukunin mo sana para sa bday ng pamangkin mo.

 

Wow, lakas ng tawa ng jowa mo. Ano bang knock knock jokes ang pinagsasabi ng lalaking yan?

 

“Ate Winter, you want some ice candy?”

 

“Huh? No, kyungsan... I’m fine, iyo na lang yan.”

 

“But you look angry? You don’t really want ice candy?”

 

“I’m fine, kid... hindi ako galit, ano habulan na ulit?”

 

Para hindi mo na maisip ang malignong kasama ng jowa mo, nakipaglaro ka na lang sa mga bata. At buong araw, since para yatang magnet sa jowa mo yung lalaki di ka makalapit, thank goodness for Giselle, she kept you company again.

 

She was telling you stories nung mga bata pa sila ni Karina. You can’t help but wonder about that guy.

 

“Yang si Lucas, simula pa lang bata kami gusto na nyan si Rina.”

 

“Ano?”

 

“Ay di pa ba nakukwento sayo ni Rina? Guy best friend nya yang si Lucas. Tapos naging childhood sweethearts di kalaunan.”

 

“Aaahh, kaya pala ang lapit nilang dalawa.”

 

“Ay hahaha may sasabihin pa sana ako kaso baka magulat ka pagsinabi ko, dapat si Rina nalang pala tanungin mo.”

 

Nasagot ang mga tanong mo nung nagsikainan na sa hapag for dinner.

 

“Buti at hindi ka busy ngayon Lucas at nakasalo ka.”

 

“Well, I heard po maagang nagpunta rito si Rina so I asked my secretary to cancel my schedule for today.”

 

“Sira ka! Wag ka nga, damay mo pa ko. Tamad ka lang talaga magwork.”

 

Pang-aasar ng jowa mo, sana naman maalala nyang nandito ka pa.

 

“Itigil nyo nga yan para pa rin kayong mga bata kung umasta.”

 

Nagtawanan ang mga nasa hapag, sanaol okay na okay sa pamilee ng iyong beloved jowa. Kahit yung tatay ni Karina, nakikipagkwentuhan at biruan doon sa lalaki.

 

“Iho, kailan mo naman balak tanungin ulit tong bunso ko?”

 

“Dad!”

 

Sita ni Karina at agad hinanap ka, buti naalala nyang may plus one syang bitbit dito.

 

“Tito, si Karina lang naman po ang hinihintay ko. If she gives me another chance, hindi ko po sasayangin.”

 

“Lucas...”

 

“Oh nak, ikaw lang pala eh! Don’t worry iho, wala yata itong mapalit sayo. Kaya yayain mo na ulit ng kasal agad ha?”

 

“Really tito? Rina, I might just do that.”

 

Para kang nawala sa narinig mo, tama ba yung pagkakaintindi mo?

 

“You know I am busy with med school, didn’t I tell you—“

 

Ahh, busy sa med school pala ang dahilan, tangina.

 

“I know kaya you called the wedding off years ago to pursue your passion. I know, Rina. I know better now kaya nga I told you I won’t be that impatient anymore.”

 

Nakita mo sa peripheral vision mo how Rina was trying to look at you pero hindi mo minimeet ang mata nya. The guy even kissed her sa right cheek nya. 

 

Her family squealed in delight. You forced a smile, may cheering squad nga pala silang dalawa.

 

Gaano pa ba karaming bagay ang tinatago nya sa iyo?

 

Ilang kasinungalingan pa ba ang aangat?

 

Kilala mo ba talaga siya?

 

 

—-

 

“You did not tell me that he was your ex, childhood sweetheart pa pala kayo.”

 

“That’s the point kaya hindi ko sinabi sayo, because we’re exes!”

 

“Exes na muntik nang ikasal! Rina, big deal sa akin yon to know that Lucas guy was actually your ex-fiance who happens to be really close hanggang ngayon sa family mo.”

 

“It doesn’t matter kasi look, magbest friends ang mga lolo at tatay namin so of course he is still close with us. Ganon na talaga yon, ever since.”

 

“Us, so pati ikaw? You even let him kiss you on your cheeks right in front of me. Ano naman palang lugar ko dito? Bakit dinala mo pa ko? Ah wait, oo nga pala, as your roommate and friend.”

 

“Winter, ano bang sinasabi mo? Lucas and I are just friends, okay? We’ve been friends mula pagkabata, stop being ridiculous! Tapos na kami matagal na and that engagement wala na lang sa amin yung tungkol doon. Plus, I was surprised sa ginawa niya hindi ako nakailag and I can't make a scene over that."

 

“Hmm maybe sa iyo wala na, but sa family mo and para sa Lucas na yon mayroon pa. Yeah, I should stop. Kaibigan mo lang naman ako.”

 

“Winter! 

 

Ano nga namang laban mo doon? Simula pa pala sa kalololohan nila ang bonding ng pamilya nya at ni Lucas. 

 

Hindi ka bulag para hindi mo makitang they have been pairing up Rina and Lucas buong celebration kanina. Maka #teampast pala ang pamilee nya, paano ka namang mag-isang bumabandera sa #teamforever?

 

This is suffocating, kailangan mong lumabas.

 

“Oh roomie, saan ka pupunta?”

 

Nakasalubong mo si Giselle habang pabalik ka sa kwarto ninyo para kunin ang wallet at phone mo.

 

“May alam ka bang malapit na bar dito?”

 

“Op op op teka lang, anong bar? Bakit?”

 

“Gi, sagutin mo na lang yung tanong ko.”

 

“Bakit nga?”

 

“I need a drink...”

 

Pero hindi ka nya pinapalabas ng pinto, sa laki nyang yan hindi ka talaga makaraan.

 

“Kung hindi ka magsasabi looks like I am going to find one on my own.”

 

“Huyyy Winter! Hindi pwede, tingin mo makakalabas ka? Bakit mo naman kailangang uminom?”

 

“Do you really want to know?”

 

“Oo, makikinig ako. Kaibigan ka ng pinsan ko kaya hindi kita pwede mapabayaan, malilintikan ako. Tsaka friends na tayo dinaldal ko na lahat ng sikreto ng pamilya namin eh.”

 

Lumapit ka rito to at bumulong.

 

“I’m just like you.”

 

“Eh?”

 

“Biual din ako...”

 

“Nani?”

 

“Gi, I feel suffocated sa lahat ng nalaman ko. Si Karin—“

 

“Omg kaya pala may lukso ng kabaklaan! Tama nga ang hula ko! My gaydar really works, so does that mean kaya ka nandito because you like my cousin?”

 

“Uh yes but—“

 

“Teka kaya ba kayo nagsisigawan kasi umamin ka na tapos eh rejected ka, kaya need mo uminom? Binalaan na kita, that cousin of mine is fcking straight!”

 

“Uhmm...”

 

Agad-agad ka nitong inakbayan, guess this is much safer kaysa malaman nyang kayo talaga ni Karina knowing na hindi komportable ang jowa mo na sabihin ito kahit pa sa pamilya nya, dinala sa bandang bintana ng kwarto nyo.

 

“Naiintindihan ko na... ganito this is the only way to escape, hintayin kita sa baba. Di naman gaano kataas ito kaya talunin mo lang.”

 

Kinindatan ka nito.

 

“I know a bar na medyo malapit dito, punta tayo sa tindahan ni Aling Nena dahil doon ko pinapark yung extra scooter ko.”

 

Ghad, she is asking you to jump from the 2nd floor. Kaya mo ba? But you’re fcking desperate. You badly need to drown yourself in alcohol so you could stop the ugly feelings.

 

“Talon ka na, ako na magsasara ng bintana. Kita tayo sa tindahan, ako na bahala sa sarili ko umeskapo basta alam mo naman na saan banda yung sari-sari store.”

 

Ano ba itong pinaggagawa mo?

 

—-

 

You’re holding an ice pack sa gilid ng bibig mo. Sinundo kayo ni Giselle, nina Karina at Dad nya mula sa presinto.
Nasaktuhan mo yung asungot na ex ng jowa na nasa bar din kung saan kayo nagpapalipas oras ni Gi.

 

You saw that Lucas guy inappropriately touched the girl, who obviously kept on resisting. Kaya sinugod mo buti nalang Giselle found you right after masapak ka rin, nakilala sya nito at hindi na ulit gumanti ang lalaki. But of course you tried pleading your case sa police station. 

 

That Lucas guy ually harassed someone at hindi ka magbubulag-bulagan.

 

“Hindi ko po magagawa ang sinasabi ninyo, alam ko po ang nakita ko kagabi.”

 

“Iha, mismong ang sinasabi mong biktima ang hindi sumang-ayon sa paratang mo. Buti na lang at mabait si Lucas, hindi ka na dinemanda pa. Bisita ka namin, kargo kita naiintindihan mo ba?”

 

Kung may pagkakapareho kayo ng magiging father in law mo, pareho kayong may paninindigan sa mga paniniwala ninyo.

 

“At etong ginawa mo sa anak ng gobernador at kumpadre ko, isa itong kahihiyan! Kaya sasama ka sa amin para humingi ng dispensa sa pamilya nila Lucas bukas ng umaga.”

 

Ginagalang mo man ang mga nakatatanda, mas malaki pa rin ang hinahawakan monh moralidad.

 

“Wala ho kong ginawang mali. Hindi ninyo kailangan humingi ng tawad.”

 

“Iha, minsan hindi masamang babaan yang pride mo.”

 

“Sir, with all due respect, I don’t need to apologize to anyone dahil wala naman ho akong nagawang mali.”

 

He can see na you’re not going to back down.

 

“Karina! Pagsabihan mo itong kaibigan mo. I expect tomorrow morning nakahanda kayong dalawa para sa lunch kina Lucas at Ninong Erwin mo.”

 

—

 

Dire-diretso ka sa pinakadulong kwarto malayo sa buong pamilya nya, yung sa inyo ni Giselle. Kasi alam mong kaunti na lang para kang bombang sasabog.

 

Napakaunfair eh!

 

“Winter!”

 

“Winter! Ano ba?!”

 

“Winter!”

 

Once na nakapasok na kayo sa kwarto ay huminto ka na and finally hinarap na rin ang kasintahan mo. 

 

“Just what the hell did you do? Pwede namang pumayag ka na lang sa gusto ni Dad!”

 

Sa span ng dalawang linggo, pwede ba talagang magbago ng ganoon kabilis ang isang tao? Nakikilala mo pa rin ba itong nasa harap mo?

 

Of all people na tanging nakakakilala sayo sa loob ng pamamahay na ito, pati sya hindi ka kayang paniwalaan?

 

Of all people, pakiramdam mo wala ka na ngang kakampi, pati ba naman sya? The world can turn its back against you kakayanin mo pero kung sya, hindi mo kaya.

 

Yung taong mahal na mahal mo at inakala mong mahal ka rin, bakit ganito sya kung makatingin sayo ngayon?

 

“Tsaka bakit mo naman ginawa kay Lucas yon? My god, Win! What’s with you? hindi kayang gawin ng kababata ko yung sinasabi mo, baka naman na misunderstood mo lang yung nangyayari. Uminom ka ba?”

 

Sana nga lasing ka na lang para hindi mo maintidihan ang mga sinasabi nya at di ka masaktan ng ganito.

 

“Look at what you did to yourself buti hindi gumanti yung tao ng husto at isang suntok lang ang inabot mo! Bakit ba gusto mo kong laging nag-aalala sayo?”

 

Unti-unting gumuguho ang mundo mo sa bawat salitang sinasabi nya.

 

“Karina, kilala mo rin naman ako. Bakit ako magsisinungaling? At sa lahat ng bagay na pwede kong palagpasin, hindi ko hahayaang pati moralidad ko lulunukin ko!”

 

“Win, makinig ka, the girl said he did not harass her! This is not the time and Lucas is not the right person para pagpraktisan mo ng mga tinuturo sa inyo sa law school, okay?”

 

Anong sinabi nya? 

 

“Plus, I don’t like the way na sinasagot-sagot mo si Dad kanina, he is just doing you a favor! Anong mangyayari if Lucas files a case against you?! Naisip mo ba yung epekto non sa future mo? Hindi ka makakapagtake ng bar exam!”

 

“Wow! Of course ako na naman yung mali.”

 

“Yes, dahil you are being unreasonable! Winter, if this is just because I did not tell you that he was an ex fiance, I swear you have nothing to be jealous about Lucas. Sinabi ko naman sayo eh, so please stop this non-sense. Sasama ka sa amin ng family ko, we’ll have lunch sa bahay nina Lucas to apologize.”

 

“Hindi, hindi ako sasama bukas.”

 

“Winter, please listen to me! Sama ka kasi ng sama kay Gi, bakit ka lumabas ng di nagpapaalam at sa bar pa talaga?”

 

That’s enough, Giselle had been nothing but good to you tapos si Karina dinadamay pa ang tanging tao sa household nila na nakakaappreciate sa iyo aside sa Mom at mga kapatid nya.

 

Absurd, kaya naman tumungo ka sa gilid at kinuha ang bag mo.

 

“What the hell are you doing?!”

 

Sinuksok yung mga damit at gamit mong nilagay mo sa closet. Buti na lang talaga dito kayo sa shared room nyo ni Giselle nag-away.

 

“Winter, ano bang ginagawa mo?”

 

Bumaba na yung tono ng boses nya, I guess she’s finally realizing kung saan ito papunta.

 

“Walang sasama sa inyo bukas because I’m going back to Manila. If you want that lunch with Lucas and your soon to be in law family again so bad then, go!”

 

You did not expect it, di mo sinasadyang sabayan at taasan sya ng boses but it just happened, nasigawan mo na at namumula na yang pisngi mo sa lakas ng sampal nya.

 

After a few seconds, narealize ni Karina ang ginawa nito.

 

“W-win, I’m sorry. Di ko sinasadya. Ikaw kasi kung anu-anong sinasabi mo.”

 

She tried na lapitan at hawakan ka.

 

“No, wag kang lumapit. I think we should be honest tutal ganito naman na, why don’t we just end this? End our secret relationship!”

 

“What? No! Winter, baby no, what are you saying?”

 

“You... you never really considered na ipakilala ako sa family mo. Kung alam ko lang then I would not have pursued you. I can’t make you choose between me and your family dahil hindi ako ganoong tao, Rina.”

 

“Win...that’s not true... I just need more time!”

 

“I’m not saying na masama yung ginagawa natin heck no! Of course not! It’s just that alam mong I won’t do something na sobrang makakasira sa iba. I can see why you’re not telling them, naiintindihan ko. I think this is... this is for the better. Let’s not see each other anymore.”

 

“Baby... babe no, bakit ka naman makikipagbreak sa akin?”

 

Pinagpatuloy mong iligpit ang mga gamit mo. 

 

“Stop! Winter, there’s no need for us to break up. I’m sorry, okay? Please stop being impulsive. You don’t really mean it, diba?”

 

Hinawakan ka nito sa braso para tumigil ka.

 

“Let’s save each other from the heart aches if we choose to prolong this when it’s clear we won’t be endgame.”

 

“What?”

 

“Rina, we both know na ayaw mong suwayin ang parents mo, ayokong magkagulo kayo. Plus, you have Lucas, botong boto naman sa kanya ang Dad mo and sabi mo nga you know him well kababata at ex mo sya. Umoo ka na sa kanya noon at muntik pa kayong makasal sa altar. You won’t have much problem if it’s him, isn’t it perfect?”

 

“But ikaw ang mahal ko!”

 

“Really? What a way to show it then!”

 

Natahimik ito sa sinabi mo, may point ka naman kasi puro sya Lucas, Lucas kanina kahit ikaw ang nasa harapan nya.

 

“See? Tapusin na lang natin ito.”

 

“No! Hindi ka aalis, hindi tayo maghihiwalay!”

 

Nakarating ka na sa pinto when she harshly pull you back and kiss you. Nalalasahan mo na pati yung mga luha nya. Ikaw, you did not cry, hindi ka iiyak sa harap nya. 

 

You have to be firm sa decision mo or else, magiging repetitive lang ang lahat.

 

“Please don’t leave me. Winter, baby please, ayusin natin ito okay?”

 

“Bitawan mo ko. Ako naman ang pakinggan mo, Rina. Let me go.”

 

Niyakap ka nya ng mahigpit, binabaon ang sarili sa leeg at balikat mo and her cries are getting louder.

 

“Rina, maririnig ka ng family mo. Stop crying so hard. Please, let me go.”

 

“No, hindi tayo maghihiwalay. Hindi ka aalis dito, hindi ka aalis sa akin!”

 

“Tama na.. pinapahirapan mo lang tayo pareho eh... just go back to him and everything would be normal. You can have kids na gustong-gusto mo. Rina, that’s one wish I can never grant you.”

 

“Winter...”

 

She looked at you with her tear stained-face confused.

 

“I know you you want to have a child of your own diba? You like kids, kaya nga you’re gonna choose pedia. You told me that nung magkaibigan palang tayo. Isn’t that your wish, a complete family? Ikaw, your children at asawa mo.”

 

You finally revealed why you were so damn afraid and insecure, it’s not just about her possibly leaving you for guy but because you’ll never be that person who can give her what she desires the most. 

 

A guy who can give her a normal life she could never have with you.

 

—

 

Saan ba patungo ang sinasabi nya? Lahat ba ng ito naiisip na mula noon ni Winter, how come you have never felt na may bumabagabag sa kanya?

 

Had she been thinking this way all this time? Was it your fault for withholding that information?

 

Yung tungkol sa engagement mong nacancel due to your selfish dreams of becoming a doctor despite your father, your ex and ex’s family protests.

 

“I know you want to have a child of your own diba? You like kids, kaya nga you’re gonna choose pedia. You told me that nung magkaibigan palang tayo. Isn’t that your wish, a complete family? Ikaw, your children at asawa mo.”

 

You remember telling her all that and somehow pinagsisihan mo na but the fact remains na she’s right that is how you view a complete family.

 

“Hindi kita mabibigyan ng anak, Rina kahit pa I also love kids. Wala akong kakayanan to give you even one. Sigurado rin naman ako, it’s what your family wants din para sa iyo.”

 

“No! You’re not going anywhere.”

 

“Rina, you lost sa bet remember? This is my wish, please let me go.”

 

She tried na kumawala ulit sa yakap mo, this time she was successful. Nanghihina ka, you couldn’t take it anymore because she’s right. Iniwan ka niyang umiiyak sa likod ng pinto. Once she sets her foot outside of this room and this house, alam mong pinangako nya nang hindi na sya babalik at lilingon pa ulit.

 

She just walked out of your life permanently.

 

How are you going to live without her from now on?

 

At kahit pa ikaw lang at... ako

 

===

 

Mga behhh sagot ko pa man din sana ang lumpia sa reception ng kasal nyo 😆😆😆