When I'm feelin' tired and afraid

How do you know just what to say

To make everything alright?

When I'm 'bout to lose control
How do you patiently hold my hand
And gently calm me down?

Naalimpungatan ka, alas dos ng madaling-araw at hindi pa nagtatapos ang dilim.

Nawawala ka ba?

Nawawala ka yata.

Nawawala ka.

Mawawala ka na sana ng tuluyan kung hindi lang dahil sa kanya.

“Rina? You’re awake?”

Naramdaman mo ang yakap nya sayo mula sa likod, you were busy looking at the view in front of you from your penthouse na nalimutan mong you’re still here.

Ilang linggo ka nang nababalisa, nagigising sa gitna ng himbing na para ka lang umiidlip at sa sobrang babaw ng tulog mo ni hindi ka na rin dinadalaw ng antok pabalik.

Gaya ngayon, the moon and stars easily hypnotized you and you almost lost it. Tanaw na tanaw mula sa kama nyong dalawa ang mga nakabibighaning kinang.

Masyado ng malalim ang iniisip mo, these days comments were harsher and hit you a lot harder than the first time.

“Anong nasa isip mo?”

She asked you with that gentle tone of hers while leaving soft kisses on your shoulder. It makes you want to sigh, she really keeps you sane.

“Win, I think nawawala na ko.”

You decided to be honest because you feel too much. Your held her hand na nakahawak sa bewang and fill the spaces between her fingers.

Sukat na sukat. Iyong-iyo para punan.

You can’t help but thank all the stars for bringing her to you.

“Why would you think that?”

“I feel like nagbago ako, hindi na ko yung dating ako. I just don’t feel like myself anymore..”

You cried to her, mabigat kasi, you kept this to yourself for so long dahil ayaw mong mag-aalala sya or any of your loved ones.

“Paano nga kung tama sila, Win? That there’s something wrong with me na I deserved to really be hated?”

You were the biggest star, lahat yata ng kasulok-sulokan sa Pilipinas ay may mukha mo and lagi kang nasa tv.

For all the things you gained, may binayaran at binabayaran ka pa ring presyo.

You lose your privacy, most of the time. Lots of people have high expectations of you. Your company almost controls you. You spend little time with your friends. You can only go on vacations with your family for 2-3 months a year.

You kept your relationship hidden to the public, to the people with you behind the cameras, Winter is just a non-celebrity close friend. You have to sneak in and out to have your dates with her. Act like she doesn’t mean everything to you when you’re outside. The two of you are always mindful. No one, except your close friends and family knew about the two of you being together.

Better safe than sorry, kaya mo if hate would only be thrown towards you pero kung damay sya, you can’t. You’re protecting her from the harsh reality ng bagay na matagal mo nang pinangarap.

You value her so much, kantiin na nila lahat huwag lang ang pamilya mo at sya.

She’s with you right from the start, a familiar face in the crowd. Ever since the first time she watched your play back under the dim lights of UPFI Film Center, this frustrated Philosophy student who’d rather take music or film if not for her family has not leave you since then.

Not even those times when you only get a second of appearance and act with a few sentences to say can stop her from being enchanted by you.

Those are her words when you accused her of being a stalker.

She was enchanted by you.

“Tulad ng ano? Paano mo naman nasabi that you changed? Why are you even reading those comments again?”

Iniharap ka nya sa kanya.

“I couldn’t help it, I’m sorry.”

“Hmmm, patingin nga.”

She looked at your eyes, no, you think she’s looking straight to your soul. Reached out her hand to place the strands of your hair at the back of your ears, wiped those small tears on your face and softly patted your left cheek.

“Maganda ka pa rin naman.”

Sinuntok mo nga yung balikat nya. Her goofy still makes you swoon, accckk okay admit it, you love her like this

“Awww, maliit pa rin ang kamay mo.”

“Winter!”

Binalik sa iyong mukha ang kamay nyang kanina lang sa palad mo nakahawak.

Gusto mong matunaw sa ilalim ng tingin nya, alam mong kung ano pa man ang susunod nyang sasabihin hihigitin nito ang iyong paghinga.

Even those pretty/handsome faces you act with on screen can never make you feel like this.

Only her can.

Si Winter lang

“Mahal na mahal pa rin kita at hinding-hindi ko magagawang tumigil.”

Nakakainis, di ba dapat papatahanin ka niya?

Bakit lalo kang umiiyak sa mga sinabi niya? Kung paano ang haplos nito umabot pati sa puso’t kaluluwa mo.

God, do you really deserve her?

“Rina, you’re still the person I’m in love with and even if you did change, I’m sure it’s for the better.”

“Winter, don’t fool me. Did I never hurt you with all these things na nagbago?”

“No one should blame anyone for changing, it’s a natural reaction after an experience. Kaya nga if you did, I’ll just have to love those changes. Ikaw pa rin yon. You’re still the one I love and nothing’s going to change that.”

“Winter, hindi pwedeng ikaw lagi ang nagaadjust! I’m sure there are times na hinihiling mo sanang hindi ganito.”

Sana hindi na lang ako artista or sana hindi ako yung minahal mo

“As long as you’re having fun, it’s fine. That’s all that matters with me, I love seeing you achieved everything you worked hard for. You know yourself better than them kaya stop dwelling sa sinasabi nila. Do you want to file a case? Our firm will handle it for you.”

Overwhelmed with the amount of love she gives, you can’t help but to break down in front of her again.

Hugs her tight and bury yourself in her tiny frame.

“I’m seriously happy when you’re happy, jagi. We got this, okay? Pumipikit naman ako kapag kissing scenes eh.”

“Sira, I know you still feel jealous. Please don’t, I love you too much.”

You really wonder how does she do it. Kung ikaw yung nasa posisyon nya, will you be able to handle it?

Winter kissing someone else?

NO

NO

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NO, YOU’LL PUNCH THE TV SCREEN OR BURN THE MAN DAMN THEATRE!!!!

“How do you do it?”

“Ang alin?

“Love me like this?”

“Just because I love you, Rina. What more reason do I need?”

You sighed, you felt lighter. Wala na yung mga batong nasa balikat mo.

“Okay, I’ll stop arguing with you Ms. Lawyer. Please come to my photoshoot this weekend. Sina Gi and Ning naman ang maghahandle.”

“Hmmm, I will let you know if I don’t need to work extra. Do you feel better?”

Tumango ka, a whole lot better thanks to her.

“Tulog na tayo ulit?”

“Yes but can you sing for me?”

“Rina...”

Sinamaan mo ng tingin, minsan ka lang magrequest eh.

“Fine.”

Winter has never changed. She always feels like home.

You hold me like I'm the one who's precious

I hate to break it to you but it's just the other way around

You can thank your stars all you want but,

I'll always be the lucky one

Thank God, she did not pursue music or else marami kang makakaagaw.
 

You kissed her on the lips right after she sings. 

Oh, you hate to disagree with her but you’re the luckiest to be in her universe

===

I at writing happy endings 😭😭😭 this shot might seem unrealistic (I do think so🤣) but I hope you do find someone who will give you the love you deserve.