02

Shocked. Scared. Petrified. Panicked. Jackson is all of that as he passes the bloody petal through his fingers. The tight and gore sensation in his chest is gone, the nausea and cold sweat, too, but he’s  still shaking with fear. 

Why on Earth did he puke a petal? He didn’t eat anything mysterious or fancy like that, only having time for half a cup of ramen. Then how?

Jackson has done nothing out of ordinary, following his routine, schedule after schedule, barely eating, barely sleeping, holding on to the people he loves and his dreams to keep himself sane, even in the intense loneliness that consumes him. His day had been just like any other, so what changed? He had finished his shooting for the new Chinese variety show, had a meeting and signed to become the face of a new brand, went to a shooting and came back to the hotel room near midnight, where he ate a bit before going to bed. His dreams were plagued by confusing and impossible images of unachievable things, like flying, or Mark loving him back. The usual impossible dreams.

When Jackson’s thoughts focus on Mark his chest tightens and it hurts, it’s like the claws are back inside, piercing his flesh. It always hurts to think of Mark, that’s nothing new, but the pain now feels far more real and suffocating.

Trying not to feel any worse, Jackson forces his thoughts away from Mark and his unrequited love, to focus on a more piercing matter. Literally.

Jackson is too