Two weeks after finals, our trip to Paris was beginning.  My parents and I left our house at 6AM to pick Handong up from her host family.  She greeted my family warmly, but otherwise stayed incredibly quiet for the duration of our car ride to the airport.  I could tell she was especially nervous; she looked down at her clammy hands and whispered certain Korean words to herself.  It was already daunting to study in a country where you had limited knowledge of the native language.  Now we would both be travelling to a land neither of us understood, and it was obvious that she placed unrelenting pressure on herself to communicate well with whoever she could.

            “It’s okay,” I finally muttered in Chinese.  My pronunciation was less than perfect, but I think it entertained her as a small smirk graced her lips.  She finally looked at me with helpless eyes and tried to swallow her fear with a big gulp.

            “Try not to worry, Dongie,” my mom called from the passenger seat.  “In Paris, you’ll all be foreigners.  No one will have any advantage.  You’ll all be working together to communicate and get around.”

            “Ah, but not surprisingly, Yoohyeon has been attempting to master the French language these past two weeks,” I chuckled.  “I’m sure she’ll guide us through the whole country.  Let’s just rely on her, Dongie.”

            She smiled nervously and nodded.  “Okay.”

            Maybe it was because of her limited Korean, but Handong always sounded like a small child to me.  She really felt like a much younger sister or cousin, and I was always tempted to treat her like one.  But I tried to resist as much as possible so she could gain her confidence on her own.  My talk with Sua last month really opened my eyes and made me worry for what will happen to Handong after I graduate.  I could feel my spirit dropping as I thought about it, so I quickly smiled at Handong and pushed it out of my mind.

            The airport was actually quite busy when we arrived.  My parents wanted to see us off well, so they parked in the parking structure and helped us wheel our bags to the terminal.  As I held my ticket in my hand, I could feel my heart start to beat a little faster.  I had been so caught up in school and my feelings about our friendships that I hadn’t truly realized we would be in France by the end of the day.  I took Handong’s shaky hand and led us to our baggage check.

            “Dongie, if you run out of spending money, just tell Jiu and she’ll take care of you,” my father told Handong as we walked to the terminal.  “I’m sure it would be too difficult to have your parents transfer money from China.”

            “My friend Miyeon gave me some extra spending money last week before she graduated too,” I informed excitedly.  “We’ll have to do some shopping.  We’re not going home without some beautiful souvenirs.”

            When we reached the gate, we noticed Siyeon, Yoohyeon, Dami, and Gahyeon sitting by three of the male professors from our school who were leading the trip.  A small group of exhausted boys sat across from them, basically leaning on one another to try to fall asleep again.  I laughed quietly as I realized Yoohyeon was doing the same to Dami.

            “Yoohyeon,” I called gently as she sprawled herself out over Dami who was attempting to read a book.  “Are you wearing your uniform?”

            The bright red and blue colors could be seen under her oversized black jacket.  Without opening her eyes, she stretched her body and let out an angry whine.  “I thought we had to wear it today.”

            “Only on days we have class,” I chuckled, petting her messy hair.

            “Hey.”  Gahyeon pulled Handong into the seat next to her as she looked at the boys nearby.  “There are eight boys going on this trip.  That means one for each of us, plus a dramatic breakup and sudden rebound.  I volunteer for that storyline-”

            “Shh, Gahyeon, they’ll hear you,” Siyeon growled, grabbing Gahyeon’s arm.  “Anyway, you’re my baby.  You’re not supposed to be such a minx.”

            “Will we be living with them for the whole trip?” Dami asked anxiously.  Yoohyeon’s tired eyes shot open and she looked just as worried as Dami.

            “Didn’t any of you guys read the details of the trip?” I sighed, hoping my cheeks weren’t too red by now.  “We’ll be in our own houses.  That’s why the trip was so expensive.”

            “I’m sure your parents read the details,” my father interrupted with a laugh.  “Honey, your mother and I had better leave to make it to work on time.  Text us when you get there, okay?  The house you’re staying in won’t have wifi, but the airport should.  And send us a letter as soon as you can.”

            “We love you, honey.”  My mom wrapped her arms around me and squeezed me tight.  “I know you’ll spend most of your time taking care of your friends, but try to take some time for yourself as well.”

            “We’ll try not to wear her out, Mrs. Kim,” Yoohyeon chuckled sleepily, laying her head on Dami’s lap.

            “I feel like that’s impossible for you, Ms. Yoohyeon, but I’ll take your word for it,” my mother snapped back playfully.  “Dongie, you too, sweetie.  Have fun and don’t stress too much.”

            “Thank you so much,” Handong replied politely as my mother pulled her into a hug.

            “Bye, sweetie.”  My dad kissed my forehead, and my parents reluctantly began to walk away, waving as they went.  I wouldn’t see them for a whole two months.  It was a long time, and suddenly it sounded like it was too long to bear.  But a drowsy Yoohyeon reached out and began tickling my fingers, and I remembered why I had come.

            “Where is Sua?” Yoohyeon asked, her eyes barely open.

            “She told me last night that she had to take a separate flight due to some scheduling conflict,” I told, taking Yoohyeon’s hand and swinging it back and forth gently.  “She should arrive later in the day.”

            “Ah, I don’t want to fly without my mom,” she whined in a childish tone.

            A couple of our male classmates nearby shyly laughed at her, and she immediately blushed.  Turning over, she hid her face in Dami’s tummy and covered her head with her hand.

            “Are you two sitting together?” I asked Dami as she patted Yoohyeon’s head.

           “Yeah.”  Dami continued to tap Yoohyeon’s head until Yoohyeon gave another whine and grabbed her hand.  A satisfied giggle escaped Dami’s lips, and she watched in amusement as Yoohyeon attempted to bite her hand.

            “And I get to sit with my little troublemaker,” Siyeon said, taking Gahyeon’s face in her hands.  “Someone has to keep her away from the boys.”

            I noticed from the corner of my eye Handong looking down anxiously, as if somehow she would be sent away to sit with anyone else but me.  I quickly sat next to her and placed my chin on her shoulder.  “I guess I have my Dongdongie all to myself then.”

            “Ah…yeah,” she said as her round cheeks turned pink.

            The orange sunrise poured into the waiting room, creating a dreamy and mysterious atmosphere.  As I looked out the window into the glowing sky, my eyes felt heavier and heavier.  It all reminded me of that night on the beach when Handong cried.  I took her hand and intertwined my fingers with hers as I resisted the urge to fall asleep on her shoulder.           

            “Are you falling asleep?” I asked her, though my own eyes were barely open.

            “No.  Are you?  You should try to stay awake now so you can sleep on the plane better.”

            “Ah, okay,” I responded like an indignant child.

            I could feel her shoulder tighten and her body stiffen next to me.  Ever since that night on the beach, she had acted colder and more distant towards all of us, but especially me.  It was as if she was anticipating our separation that would take place a whole year later.  Even with her rigid body language, she squeezed my hand so tightly as if she never wanted to let go.  It broke my heart, and I gave a shaky sigh as a flight attendant announced our boarding time over the loud speaker.

            “Okay, everyone,” Professor Oh called, rising from his seat and looking out at all his students.  “I think…Yes, all fourteen students are here.  Let’s get ready to board.  Stick together with your seating partner so it can all go smoothly.”

            We boarded the plane without any difficulties.  As I predicted, Handong fell asleep on my shoulder a few moments after the plane took off.  But as sleepy as I felt, I couldn’t bring my self to fall asleep.  I stared at the sky as it turned blue, wondering if this trip would be all that I hoped it would be.  It had to help us trust one another and make our last school year together something memorable and strengthening.  After a few minutes, I put on a movie to try to quiet my restless thoughts.

            The movie went by quickly, and my eyes grew tired even quicker.  I closed the window as more sunlight started pouring in.  Though I had tried to be sneaky, I was alarmed to feel Handong sitting up next to me and slowly opening her eyes.

            “Jiu…you’re still awake?” she asked with her soft voice.

            “I can’t fall asleep,” I shrugged, attempting to get comfortable in my seat.  “I’m sorry for waking you, Dongie.  Go back to sleep.”

            “Not until you fall asleep,” she grinned, looking at me with her sleepy eyes.  “I had a dream about Sua.”

            “Oh yeah?  I guess she didn’t want to miss our flight after all,” I chuckled.

            “We were sitting in a park in Paris,” Handong explained with a smile.  “It’s funny you say that…She apologized to me for having to take a separate flight.  It was so…what’s the word…colorful?  Bright?  It felt so real.  We talked for a while.  She told me…”

            I watched Handong carefully as she looked down at her hands.  She twiddled her thumbs and gave a sigh.  “Dongie…what did she tell you?”

            “She…told me not to be afraid,” she whispered.  “Not to worry about next year.  She wanted me to enjoy this trip and not think about what’s coming next.  And she told me…to trust you.”

            “Ah…”  I heard her give a small hiccup as she tried to hold in her tears, and I quickly took her hand.  “Handong…you know I won’t leave you alone, right?”

            “But next year…”

            “Next year won’t change anything,” I assured, the words spilling out of me.  There was a desperation in the pit of my stomach to somehow convince her not to worry.  My heart beat faster as if it couldn’t stand another minute of Handong’s worrying.  “Even when next year comes, I’ll be here for you.  Even if that means over the phone or visiting you whenever I can.  Dongie, do you ever think of when you graduate and have to go back to China?”

            “I…”  She pondered the question for a while and shook her head.  “I don’t really think about it.”

            “Well, when you go back to China, you’ll be leaving all of us here in Korea.”  I could feel how tense she was, and I quickly regretted how severe my words were.  I opened the window again and pointed outside.  “I mean…we’re in an airplane, so we’re not in Korea.  So you’ll be leaving us there, somewhere in that direction.”

            A small laugh slipped out of , and I squeezed her hand.  “You don’t think about it because I know you don’t intend to abandon us.  Plus, we’re all too busy enjoying our time together now to think so far ahead.  Dongie…please trust me.”

            Handong looked up at me with a weak smile, and I could see tears in her eyes.  She quickly whimpered and looked down at her hands again, hiding her face with her hair.  “Jiu…I’m sorry.”

            “No no, Dongie, don’t be sorry,” I laughed, wrapping my arms around her and placing my head on her shoulder again.  “Dongie, look at me.”

            She finally looked back at me and I gave her my brightest smile.  I wiped the tears from her eyes as she eventually laughed and blushed.  Something about her red eyes assured me that she finally understood, and I was overjoyed.

            “Dongie, I’ll make sure to always protect you.  You’re precious to me, and I love you.  So stay where you are and don’t go anywhere.  Let’s just enjoy this trip together and not think too far ahead, okay?”

            “Okay.”  She reached over and closed the window again.  “Jiu, you should go to sleep now.  We still have a while until we land.”

            “I feel like I can finally fall asleep,” I grinned happily.  I cuddled up to her and she rested her head on top of mine without any stiffness or restraint. 

“Dongie, I have a surprise for you.”

            “A surprise?  What is it?”

            “Yoohyeon is helping me with it,” I smirked, finally closing my eyes.  “Hopefully it’ll be finished sometime while we’re in Paris.  Be sure to anticipate it.”

            “Hmm…okay…”

            My heart beat slow and hard like it usually did when I was on the very edge of falling asleep.  Suddenly I felt like there was hope for this trip to be everything I wanted it to be.  All my worries were swirling together and dissipating in my foggy mind.  Maybe none of them would even mean anything for the entire trip.  I could only hope so.