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Taehyung isn't sure he's Taehyung anymore.

Right now, Taehyung  isn't sure of what he's doing. 

He isn't sure of why he's doing it, or who he's doing it to.

He's never kissed anyone before, but he doesn't seem to process the fact that he's straddling Jungkook on the floor. He just can't grasp that his lips are tasting Jungkook's lips, which have notes of melon and honey from the soju he downed before coming to the store. Tae refuses to believe that he's clutching Jungkook's hood until his knuckles turn white. The younger's arms come to circle around Tae's waist as he sits up, but he's still in denial.

This isn't real.

Sure. Tae decides he'll go with the fact that all this isn't real. It's just an image conjured up by his hormones fighting an incessant war with his sanity and ability to think clearly. Lack of ual activity (or a complete absence thereof) can do that to a teenage boy. Yes, that's all it is.

But Taehyung thinks the smell of Jungkook's sweat is very real. The firm grip on his waist feels very real. The lips moving against his with slight urgency and vigor seem pretty real, too. It isn't until Taehyung lets a moan escape from his throat when Jungkook's tongue suddenly darts out to taste the inside of his mouth, that he realizes this occurrence is deathly real. If Taehyung wasn't so red at the moment all the blood would drain from his face. He's shaking as he pulls away from Jungkook's lips with a horrified look on his face. Jungkook is bright red and dizzy, the alcohol spreading stars across his line of sight. "Jungkook I...I d-don't..I didn't mean..." Taehyung is at a loss for words and he's frozen in place, beaming at Jungkook. Jungkook's grin never falls, but his eyes close in pure drunken bliss. "You taste like sunshine." Taehyung's eyes fall to Jungkook's belt in an effort to hide his blush-ridden cheeks, but staring at the boy's groin is certainly no help.

"Tae, do you know what I want?" Jungkook his lips slowly as he tries to find the words to fit his next sentence. "I really and truly just want.."

Taehyung can't believe that he's leaning in close, eager to hear what Jungkook has to say. "Y-yes..?Say it.."

"I want...I want..." Jungkook is on the brink of spilling his desires when he suddenly jolts forward, presses a hand over his mouth and runs out of the store. Tae scrambles to his feet in confusion and stares out the door as Jungkook throws it open and throws up--right into the freshly-trimmed hedges.

Taehyung frowns, swearing to himself. "Fabulous."

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"Pick your feet up, dummy." Taehyung is growing frustrated, an arm thrown over the back of his neck as he drags an almost-conscious Jungkook up the hill to his house. Jungkook is groaning incoherent things and it's clear he's ready for bed. The moment Taehyung thinks he feels sorry for the wasted dead weight he's carrying, he slaps the boy on the forehead and urges him to wake up. With every slap he reminds himself of how much he hates Jungkook. They're only a couple of steps away when Taehyung slumps him up against the stairs leading to his front yard, snapping in his face. "Wake up, Jungkook. It's 11:30 PM. I have to go home and you're going to get in a lot of trouble." Taehyung gets another groan in response, and Jungkook is motionless and sick. He looks like he's about to puke again and Tae grimaces. Rolling his eyes, he grabs Jungkook by his hood and knocks on the door. After he waits for five minutes, Taehyung gets a little concerned.

With no help from Jungkook, Tae decides to try the door himself. When it clicks open he's much more surprised than scared, and he heaves Jungkook up the stairs. He is met with four different doors and he settles on a blue door that reads "Kook" in large letters. When Tae opens the door, the scent of freshly washed clothes almost slaps him in the face and he's instantly relaxed. Moonlight is creeping through Jungkook's curtains and the room is neat and tidy, with all of his shoes lined up and not a single hair out of place. 

Taehyung isn't that amazed by the sight. He expected Jungkook to be perfect; naturally his room was perfect as well.

I still hate him though.

Jungkook is knocked out at this point, so Tae dumps him on his bed and stretches his joints from the relief. "Great, now I can go." Taehyung quickly makes his way to the bedroom door, but he stops when he hears Jungkook groan again. He's asleep, but he's visibly uncomfortable in the position he's in. His arms are awkwardly bent at a painful angle, and his long legs are dangling off of the bed.

I don't care. Hell, I didn't even have to help him this much. I've done my part!

Taehyung talks to himself in his head as he looks down at Jungkook. He's about to leave when he turns towards the door and spots a picture sitting  atop Jungkook's dresser. Something tells Taehyung to look closer at the child in the picture, and he swears it's..

Me?

He..kept this?

It's a picture of Taehyung as a child with a giant lollipop in his hand. He's sitting on a carousel horse and laughing into the camera, while Jungkook sits backwards on the horse in front of him. As always, Jungkook is smiling from ear to ear in the picture, so hard his little cheeks could've collapsed.

Taehyung shakes it off and starts for the door again. But again he is stopped by another picture on the door: a crying Taehyung with a scrape on his knee, and a smiling Jungkook pasting a band-aid on it.

Taehyung stealing Jungkook's ice-cream cone.

Jungkook showing Tae how to tie his shoes.

Their first sleepover together.

The memories are all over the room and Taehyung can't seem to escape from them. Everywhere he turns there's another happy memory that he's forgotten. Something inside of Taehyung is moving. It's growing, immensely and rapidly and he can't seem to stop it. He can hear it growing but he rejects the feeling until it's unbearable. Until it's all he can feel, hear, taste and see. He turns to Jungkook in the bed and silently undoes his laces on his Timberlands, tears falling from his eyes. He makes a half-assed effort to rub them away but they just continue to pinch through his ducts. He ignores it after a while and his face is a wet, shining mess. 

Strangely, he's okay with it.

He's crying to himself as he pulls off Jungkook's shoes and socks, and then his jeans. Tae leaves his hoodie on and flips his body over, allowing Jungkook to rest on his back. He pulls up the covers and lays them snuggly over Jungkook's body, moving the stray hairs from his forehead. 

As Taehyung leaves the room, he tells himself he doesn't cry, and that he won't remember this moment or any of the memories scattered across Jungkook's walls.

However, Taehyung has been a pathological liar ever since he was a child.

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Quite a short update for now because I'm sure this will be an extra busy week and I wanted to try to get something out for you guys. As soon as I get my time and sanity back you will be treated to a full-length update! Yay~

Thank you for reading my lovelies--until next time! <3