Heartbeats and blushes

A few days later, Trost had gotten better. The dog had returned to being his playful and mischievous self, which made Yixing relieved to see again. Meanwhile, Junmyeon had started thinking that perhaps being blind didn’t mean he was entirely useless. Helping Trost had proven him that, and maybe it was because of Yixing’s words of encouragement that he had managed to realize it. Junmyeon was glad, but also sad. He knew that Yixing was going to leave soon, he always knew it, and at first, he wanted it to happen fast. Now, however, Junmyeon wished time wasn’t running out that quickly.

Today, Junmyeon and Yixing were sitting on the dock, gazing into the distance, listening to music together, the midafternoon sun warming them. Trost laid between the pair, sound asleep, and both were petting the dog’s fur. Sometimes their hand’s clashed but neither withdrew them or said anything, just let the contact happen until one of them moved their hand to caress another part of the dog.

“Yixing, we should do something today,” Junmyeon uttered after the song came to an end.

Yixing looked at the other dumbfoundedly. “What? You mean like… Go to the town?” he said with hidden excitement in his voice.

“Yeah… Let’s go wander around, or actually let’s go shopping. I need to renew my closet. This outfit is getting kinda outdated,” Junmyeon said. It was true, he had used the same type of clothes since he had arrived to live with his parents.

“Thank god you realized that,” Yixing said and chuckled. Junmyeon lightly pushed him but ended up laughing as well.

Trost was left behind because they didn’t want to tire him much, he still needed to rest. Yixing couldn’t help smiling as they got up and made their way to put on their shoes. He was beyond thrilled to have heard Junmyeon say that because it confirmed his earlier thoughts. That day at the vet clinic after his original shock, Yixing realized what Junmyeon had done. Junmyeon had gotten out on his own, well, kind of. And as they had waited for the dog to wake up, as they had gone for lunch together, Junmyeon had seemed normal. This gave Yixing hope that once he left, Junmyeon would not fall back into old patterns, and today’s suggestion supported that thought. He felt at ease to know that, yet his heart was uneasy because he would return. This was probably the first time he wished time would slow down. Surely, he and Junmyeon had started off on the wrong foot, but the more they got to know each other, the more Yixing felt reluctant to leave. Nevertheless, he kept smiling as they made their way to the car.

Yixing parked the car near the town’s plaza, where there were shops and buildings of all kind. They got off the vehicle and walked into the first clothing store Yixing saw. The pair strode around. Junmyeon could have taken with him the color detector and thoroughly touch the garments to get an idea of the clothes, but he let Yixing explain the things they were grabbing. As weird as it sounds he didn’t mind listening to Yixing talk, not anymore.

“Should I trust your fashion sense?” Junmyeon asked from the dressing room as Yixing waited outside. They had gathered at least a two dozen of clothes, a mixture of pants, jeans, shirts, t-shirts and more. Yixing was the one who had organized them into possible outfit combinations.

“For your information, I was named the most fashionable guy in high-school.”

“Really?”

“No… But I am friends with him! For the past years, Tao has passed his knowledge to me.”

Junmyeon chuckled. “Well, you can’t be worse than my parents,” he said and then got out the changing room. “How do I look?”

The clothes itself were just a plain gray t-shirt and black jeans, yet somehow Junmyeon made them look beyond their simplicity. Even the dark shades complemented it nicely. “Fantastic,” was the only word Yixing could say.

Junmyeon smiled as his cheeks turned a tad pink and his heart skipped a beat. “You’re just too nice to say otherwise,” he said.

“Not really… For example, I’m glad you decided to come shopping today because you were starting to look awful on those khaki pants and that white t-shirt,” Yixing said and giggled warm-heartedly

That made Junmyeon laugh again. “Then, it’s a good thing were getting rid of those when we get home.”

They spent the rest of the time with Junmyeon trying on clothes, and in the end, they left the store with some bags. Yixing went to leave the bags in the car while Junmyeon waited for him. He needed to buy some shoes now. When Yixing returned they continued their walk through the plaza.

“Do you want an ice-cream?” Yixing asked as they approached an ice-cream stand. “They have waffle cones and cups.”

“Sure, I’ll take a cone.”

Once they stood in front of the ice-cream stand, Yixing ordered a vanilla ice-cream for him while Junmyeon wanted a chocolate one. Yixing guided them to a seat on one of the benches in the plaza. It was probably around late afternoon now. Some children were running around and playing with the water fountain. People were immersed in conversations on the seats nearby. Yixing and Junmyeon were talking about which store to go next.

Then, Junmyeon heard a sound of something smashing the ground. “What was that?” he asked.

“Eh, I kinda dropped my ice-cream.”

Junmyeon laughed. “I’m the blind one, yet you’re the one dropping his ice-cream?”

“It’s not my fault! I got distracted by something beautiful.”

“What?”

“You.”

Junmyeon lightly pushed Yixing, yet he was blushing again. “I’m not giving you mine so, you better stop lying.”

Yixing chuckled.

Later they got up and continued with their trip. After they had found the best five pair of shoes, Yixing and Junmyeon made their way back to the car. It was the night-time now, and as they approached the outskirts of town Yixing saw something. He hadn’t paid much attention to the surroundings this afternoon, but now that it was functioning he saw the carnival from afar. He stopped the car.

“Oh, I didn’t know there was a carnival here,” Yixing said.

“It’s a traveling carnival that always visits this town in the summer,” Junmyeon replied.

“Would you… Like to go?” Yixing asked nervously. This was probably a tougher task to carry out for Junmyeon. In the stores and while walking today, there hadn’t been a lot of people, and Junmyeon had seemed comfortable. But now that place was probably going to be full of them. So, if Junmyeon said no, today had still been a big step forward.

Junmyeon thought about it. After a while, he answered, “Sure, it sounds fun.”

Yixing couldn’t help grin broadly. “It will be!” he said elatedly, all previous nervousness gone.

Yixing drove them there. Looking around, he had been right because it was as if all town had gathered tonight. Maybe because he read in the posters that it was the opening night.

Noises, laughs and music Junmyeon could hear all that, but it didn’t stress him. No, he just held on to Yixing tighter as they strode around, and no signs of regret could be seen on Junmyeon’s face.

The first attraction they got on was the bumper cars. The pair shared one car and Yixing let Junmyeon be the driver. There was no risk, besides the meaning of the game was to bump other vehicles. Yixing only told Junmyeon about the other cars and where to go. They made a good team, and Junmyeon was laughing to his heart’s content along with Yixing. Junmyeon’s smile and laughter didn’t falter when they rode the orbiter, the music express, and even the carousel, which he had said was childish but accompanied Yixing anyways. Next, they competed in the mini basketball machines. Yixing closed his eyes to be on the same level as Junmyeon, and Junmyeon believed in his words. Again, Yixing could hear Junmyeon laugh and shout happily when he scored, his competitive nature coming to life. In the end, Junmyeon had won with one point difference. It seemed Junmyeon was really lucky tonight because when they played the ring toss game, he managed to aim one bottle, earning a small stuffed rabbit as a price. Yixing however, despite seeing, wasn’t as fortunate. Soon, their bellies growled, and the pair went to look after something to eat. After hearing the different options, Junmyeon opted for a hamburger and Yixing too.

“Careful not to drop it,” Junmyeon teased once they were sitting on the grass, somewhere people wouldn’t step on them. Yixing just laughed.

The night continued that way with Yixing and Junmyeon riding the different attractions, playing the games Junmyeon could, and laughing and having fun together. Until there was only one last ride to try, the Ferris wheel.

Yixing wasn’t fond of heights, even if it wasn’t that high, but to have Junmyeon by his side could make it all bearable. They got into the cab, and their proximity was the closest the pair had sat next to each other. Their hands were touching as both grabbed the handle. Yixing described the scenery to Junmyeon as the cab ascended slowly. Today, the moon was shining in the dark sky, and there were dazzling multicolored illuminations down there. Junmyeon, unnoticed, started to lean on Yixing’s shoulder as he listened. And when Yixing realized Junmyeon’s position, he couldn’t help blushing at their contact. Nonetheless, he tilted his head towards Junmyeon’s.

They were silent as the wheel motioned them downwards. A crisp summer breeze caressed their faces, but it didn’t cool off the burning sensation in their cheeks. Yixing felt his heart would jump out any minute now, that was how much Junmyeon’s proximity affected him. And he wondered why butterflies were flying wild in his stomach because as far as he remembered it, he didn’t feel them before. But somehow, he welcomed the sudden outburst of feelings.

Junmyeon’s heartbeats were also faster than usual, and he didn’t mind. Sitting with Yixing like that wasn’t strange, or weird, no, again it felt right like two puzzle bits had fallen into place. It made him smile. He wondered when the last time he had felt like that was, or better yet, when did he start feeling this way for Yixing?

In the myriad of thoughts going through their minds, they had one in common that resonated loudly. The words that had surfaced in their heads ever since they became aware of the countdown to Yixing’s return. However, neither of them said the thought, fearful it would cross a line that wasn’t bound to be traversed.

The wheel moved them upwards again.

But aren’t human beings contradictory? They can’t utter simple words of affection, yet fall weak to their inner desires because when Junmyeon raised his head from Yixing’s shoulder and turned to face him, and when Yixing redirected his gaze to meet the dark lenses, both started to lean in. It was only a short distance that separated them. Every noise they heard was shut down, it was only the two of them and their breathing in that small cab. Yixing couldn’t see it, but Junmyeon closed his eyes. Yixing looked at Junmyeon’s lips, wondering if this was really going to happen and something told him it shouldn’t, yet he continued to get closer. Then, he closed his eyes too.

Closing that gap was an interminable moment. Junmyeon felt his heart anxiously expected for the moment his lips caressed Yixing’s, while Yixing’s heart continued being an agitated mess, yearning the same as Junmyeon. They were only a little finger distance away when… It stopped. The Ferris wheel stopped and lightly pushed them back and forth.

Startled, Yixing and Junmyeon opened their eyes. Like that the moment was over and neither of them moved closer. People shouting and laughing, machine rackets, the music, it all came back to them. Aware of their surroundings and their intimate position, a blushing Yixing retrieved from Junmyeon's personal space, and Junmyeon moved his head to face away from Yixing. A kiss would have happened, but neither uttered a word. They weren’t dating, they weren’t lovers, they had just become friends. So, maybe they had been saved by the bell, and it was better to leave things unsaid.

Junmyeon and Yixing got off the Ferris wheel and decided to go back home. It wasn’t late, but both felt already tired. Their earlier awkwardness had gradually dissipated until they were back to being their old selves. On their way to the parking lot, they talked about today’s adventure and how entertaining it had been. The pair was about to get in the car when they heard a bang followed by crackling sounds.

“Fireworks,” Yixing said.

Junmyeon didn’t get on the vehicle. He moved to sit on the hood and told Yixing to sit next to him as they watched, or heard in his case, the fireworks. Yixing happily tried to describe rapidly what was going on, what shapes the explosions were, what colors he saw. Junmyeon listened attentively, smiling at Yixing’s enthusiasm.

“Yixing, I’m gonna miss this…” Junmyeon uttered although he had wanted to say ‘you’ instead. “Us hanging out,” he added and moved his head to face the other.

Yixing stopped looking at the colorful show above them to see Junmyeon. He gasped. Junmyeon had removed his dark shades. Although Junmyeon’s gaze was elsewhere, Yixing looked at those eyes and saw how the shining sparkles from the sky reflected on them. Junmyeon’s eyes were so beautiful, he thought once again. Yixing smiled, sadly. “Me too, Junmyeon… I’m gonna miss this too.”