R a s p B e r r y ބ02

When regrets comes a little bit too late

I took a deep breath after I felt him pulled himself out of me. It never occurred to me that our relationship will turned out like this. I felt the bed tilted again as he stood up and made his way towards the washroom, maybe to get himself clean up. I on the other hand just hugged my self into a ball feeling rather used by what had happened.

I waited… but as expected he never said a single word, I know, I could never make him say anything to me. I felt my tears b into my eyes as I rolled around trying to get free from the bundles of blankets that were hugging me.

I searched for my top and found it on the floor among the rest of our clothes. I painfully dressed up as I tried hard not to make a sound. It hurt me so much to be treated like a trash by the man I love. Yet I could never blame him for treating me as such ~ or could I?

I could hear him humming while taking his shower, it made me even feel worse. Am I really this unimportant that a single thank you would be so hard to say? Am I really a trash that after being use will be thrown around with out even giving me a second look.

I felt my tears finally left my eyes as it trailed down on my cheeks. I took my sneaker shoes and hurriedly slip my feet in it upon realizing that he was about to get done.

I was right, in a split second he was out of the washroom, a thin white towel loosely tied around his hips while his hands were busy drying his hair.. If it was just an ordinary night I would have already drool seeing his well built body. I wonder how many girls he already have slept with.

Another tear rolled down my cheeks and I hurriedly wipe it off

He stared at me really confused of what was I doing.

“Where are you going?” He asked but I didn’t looked back. Instead I continued trying to tie my stupid shoelaces together. Through my blurry eyes that were filled with tears I grunted after having a hard time doing such simple thing. I felt like I was about to have a nervous breakdown or is it just because my hands were trembling so much?

I was sniffing though I was trying hard not to let him know. I know he could hear my soft sobbing as I felt him walking towards me and sat right next to where I was sitting on the bed we just used to have .

Yes … it wasn’t even done with love. Maybe I did it knowing that I love him. But To Yunho??? it was never more than just .

I pretended I didn’t saw him. I pretended I was OK, I pretended that I wasn’t hoping for anything….

“Yunmi..” I heard him call my name

“I’m going” I simply said in a cracked voice.

“Where?”

“Somewhere”

“Yunmi… it’s late and I am tired can we just stay for a bit longer and rest?” he asked me lovingly as he tried hugging me from the back. But I would never allow him to touch me again like that.

I stood up as I flinched after feeling his cold arm snaking into my waist. He looked at me, shocked of how I reacted to his touch.

I stared at him for a while, still with tears muddling my face up. How I wish I could just stare at his handsome face forever. How I wish I could hold him like he is mine. But I know it could never be like that. Jung Yunho won’t ever be mine.. no matter how much I try.

Without another word I grabbed my jacket and walked off swiftly towards the door, trying to rush out before he could even ask for more. But before I could go he manage to grab my arm and yanked me back to face him.

“What’s wrong with you?” I see him gritted his teeth shaking me on the process. All I could do was to take a long deep breath and harshly pulled my arm out of his grip.

I painfully turned around and turn the knob of the door, finally opening it fully. But before I could even go out he yanked me again, forcing me to face him

“Lee Yunmi! What the hell is going on?” He asked, his voice was firm and stern that I could feel him burning up with anger.

“I need to go home” I said in a very low tone but enough for him to hear me clearly

“Fine, i’ll drive you home. Aish! You could just tell me that you want to….” he was on the process of getting dress as he pulled his boxer up while telling me that he will bring me home, but I cut him.

“No, i’m going home alone! This has to stop, I don’t want this anymore” I said to him while looking at his eyes. I can see confusion in there. But I really don’t care anymore. All I want is to let go and move on. Though it will hurt me I know eventually I can.

“What are you talking about? Yunmi stop the fu^cking game now! I don’t need all these drama!” Yunho hissed while he continue getting dress

“Drama?” I smiled bitterly as tears kept pouring out of me

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