“Hey, what’s wrong? You suddenly went quiet,” the question was followed by a little shake to his shoulder.

Pulled out of his thoughts, he realized that everyone’s eyes were on him, except for Wooyoung, and Minjun’s hand was on his shoulder. Brows still furrowed, as since the moment the question had entered his mind uninvited, he was about to voice his concern when he was interrupted by the waiting room’s door being unceremoniously opened.

“Sorry to destroy the party, but we have another party to go to! Let’s go guys!”

They all looked at their manager with nervous eyes, except for Wooyoung, again, since he was still fast asleep. Minjun lightly tapped those fluffy cheeks but was met with more grumbles.

“Come on Woodong-ah. Wake up, it’s time”, he continued, ruffling the kid’s hair.

Wooyoung blinked his eyes open, his nose scrunching up so cutely that everyone couldn’t help but smile/chuckle. Before he could rub the grogginess out of his eyes, Nickhun grabbed his wrists, reminding him of his eye make-up. Only after getting a sleepy nod from Wooyoung did he proceed to drag the "fake maknae" by the wrist out the door. Following them with his hands on Wooyoung’s shoulders, was Junho. He was messaging Wooyoung’s shoulders to further wake his hyung-but-not-hyung up.

“Palli Minjun-sshi,” Taecyeon called out, still holding the door open after Chansung and his finally-opened bottle of pringles had walked out. He looked back into the room to see Minjun picking stuff up.

“Jangkanman. Wooyoung and Junho forgot their blazers.”

Taecyeon rolled his eyes, thinking, “Those kids.” However, he proceeded to silently wait for until Minjun had passed the door.

To his surprise, Minjun stopped in the doorway and patted his arm lightly.

“It’ll be alright,” he said softly, giving the arm he just patted a gentle squeeze, before looking up and giving Taecyeon an eye-smile.  

Looking down into those earnest eyes, Taecyeon couldn’t help but smile in return, even though Minjun had misunderstood his concern. True, he was nervous about their performance but that was not the reason behind his furrowed brows. However, he decided to dismiss the disturbing thoughts because he knew he needed to focus his all for their performance. So instead, he replied with a simple, “Yeah. Let’s go.”

Seemingly satisfied, Minjun nodded, a smile still on his lips - lips that Taecyeon could not help noticing as oh-so-delicate - and headed out of the doorway towards the backstage.

“What were you guys doing being so slow?” Junho yelled when the pair came in sight.

Minjun silently handed him his blazer, to which Junho gave a sheepish smile.

Ignoring the exchange, Taecyeon initiated their backstage ritual, “ok, hands together. Let’s go, Chansung-ah”

“DON’T STOP, CAN’T STOP, 2PM GO!!”

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“Woooooohooooooo!”

A very excited Chansung zoomed pass them, fortunately not shirtless this time. The apparently 10-year-old giant was followed by another two apparently 10-year-old kids who were skipping happily while holding hands. The Junbros. Taecyeon laughed at the sight before turning to the friend beside him. He, too, was laughing heartily, all signs of the earlier nervousness gone. Their stage was magnificent and their performance was great. Of course, as always, they would focus more on the small mistakes they had done and worry about how they could have done better. But that’s for later. For now, they are happy. Exuberant, jubilant, and on cloud nine kind of happy while still high and intoxicated from the fanchants, cheers and adrenaline rush.

He clasped Nickhun’s shoulders, their laughter still in the air, when a pair of hands grabbed Nickhun’s arm from the other side to drag him towards the waiting room.

“Come on hyung!”

Nickhun had no choice but to follow the fourth 10-year-old-Wooyoung, dragging along Taecyeon whose arms were still around his shoulders.

The atmosphere in the waiting room was a giddy mess of shouts and grumbles. Junho had his legs wrapped around Minjun’s waist in a hug that was exclusively Junbros, while Minjun was complaining about his old spine breaking but still managing to hug Junho back. Chansung wanted to join in on the hug and decided a bear hug was the way to go, eliciting grumbles from Junho this time, about how he couldn’t breathe. Chansung laughed before letting them go but that did not stop Junho’s complains, unfortunately. So Chansung decided to add an apology amidst his laughter, his hands still around Junho’s shoulders. Minjun, face still scrunched up and a hand on his back in a dramatic exaggeration, went up to a beaming Wooyoung to give him a ruffle on his head and a hug, tightening his hold a little. He then went up to Nickhun and hugged him, patting his back as if to say ‘well done, you did great’. Nickhun Just buried his face in his hyung’s neck.

Then came his turn. He was ready for a hug too. But Minjun just grasped his left hand with his right, knocked the adjoining shoulder to his chest and patted his right arm twice in a bro-greeting. The little question that nudged him before their performance resurfaced.

“Why am I different?”

As the other members pulled him into their celebratory hugs, the question continued hammering his mind, insisting that he took notice.

Even while waiting for their car, he watched as Wooyoung started talking in aegyo and Minjun answering in the same manner, engaging in their usual play. He watched as Chansung teased his hyung and Minjun laughing cutely while caressing the giant's arm in a way only Minjun could pull off without looking weird. He watched the natural way Junho back-hugged Minjun while he was rummaging through his bag for more food for Chansung.

What about him? Minjun never played with him like he played with the young boys.

“Well maybe because both of you are technically the same age”, Taecyeon reasoned. "That's right, he can't talk in aegyo with you like he does with Wooyoung. That'd be weird. And embarrassing... Wouldn't it? And you can't just act all clingy with him like Junho did.... right?"

Then he recalled the silent hugs and handholds between Nickhun and Minjun. He noticed them doing it whenever either of them was feeling down, need some energy-boost or mood-lifting.

“But he rarely hugged me or held my hand like he does with Nickhun. They’re technically the same age too,” he rebutted his own reasonings.

Then again, it's not like Minjun had never held his hands. But those were usually only on stage, when they had to bow together while thanking their fans as well as to signify their performance’s end. And as his habit, when Minjun talks, he naturally touches the person he was talking to or those sitting beside him. Taecyeon himself had been on the receiving end of that if he happened to sit beside the guy. But wait... why would he care about Minjun's touch or attention in the first place?

The internal debate left Taecyeon feeling so conflicted that he couldn’t think straight anymore. He could not put his finger on exactly how he was treated differently. It wasn’t like Minjun was hostile towards him. After being together for more than 8 years, including their trainee years, Minjun and the boys are practically his family. They all know each other’s likes and dislikes, could finish each other’s sentences and practically read each other’s thoughts. And it’s not like Minjun never played or joked around with him. He does. It’s just...not the same. He just felt that Minjun acted differently around him compared to the other members. Except he could not pinpoint how. It confused and frustrated the hell out of him and he’s beginning to hate the feeling

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Sorry if you guys can't understand this chapter cos I myself got confused by taecyeon's confusion 😅🙈

I'm in uni now so I can only write during the weekends AND after I am done with all of my assignments. So apologies in advance if updates come a little late.

A special mention to aaawwoo for being my first subscriber and commentor ^^,

Also, thank you to @tinypoo16 for encouraging me to do this and @missispongo for being the first to read!

Here's where I get my inspirations from: