“…yeon! Taecyeon!”

The sudden call jerked Taecyeon out of his musings. He had been caught doing that often lately, brooding until he was unaware of his surroundings. He shook his head to clear it.

“Ne hyung?”

“Aren’t you getting off? Are you feeling okay?” His manager touched his shoulder, concern evident in his voice.

“Ah, yeah hyung,” he muttered as he hurried out of the elevator, not wanting to have to explain his absentmindedness.

His manager mentioned something as the elevator doors slid shut behind him but he was too preoccupied with his thoughts again to have heard a single word being said. His brothers had arrived. He had seen the tweets of pictures of them at the airport. Soon, he would have to come face to face with one particular ‘brother’. He cringed inwardly. He was absolutely NOT looking forward to the meeting but what choice did he have? The problem between them had manifested into a ball chain shackled around his ankles, exhausting him as he dragged his feet through his schedules, making him careless and clumsy. He could not wait to be rid of it. Already, he almost slipped up during the ‘How do you eat well and eat well’ program recording that morning. When asked of Minjun’s familial role in their team, he inevitably vented his frustrations about Minjun’s oblivion- only focusing on his passion, music, and listening to no one. It was lucky that he recovered enough to turn it into a joke, portraying Minjun as an unreliable first son instead. He could only imagine the magnitude of the mistakes he would make in the future if he did not resolve the issue between them soon.

Taecyeon stopped mid-stride and focused his vision on his surroundings after feeling like he had been walking for far too long. Turning to the nearest door, he realised that he had long before passed his room and was already nearing the end of the hallway. He scoffed at himself and wondered absently if Minjun was suffering as much as he was. Sighing, he turned around and forced himself to pay attention as he back-tracked across the hallway. Upon reaching his door, he took out his key card and swiped it against the lock. He turned the knob as a ‘to-do’ list formed in his mind. First on it was a bath. He really needed one to relax his tensed muscles if he were to brave through the nerve-wrecking talk he would have with Minjun later on. He should also put on some decent clothing. It would not hurt to look nice since it may play to his advantage. Following that train of thought, he scoffed at himself again. Who was he kidding? Looking nice would only work if Minjun felt the same way about him. Talking about Minjun, he would also need to ask Nickhun which room Minjun would be in. He paused midway through pushing the door inwards, his hand still on the knob. Would he be with Junho again? After all, they always room together when they travel. The image of them cuddling in bed, much like the previous morning, invaded his mind. He shook his head to clear the image away. He could not afford to think of that now. It would mess up his head again, as if it was not messed up enough as it is. Forcing his thoughts towards the relaxing bath he was about to have, he pushed the door all the way in and had to double-back in shock, almost dropping the bag of food in his hand. He stood frozen, his body filling the doorway, eyes wide, mouth agape and heart racing.

“Minjun?” he breathed after taking a second to regain his composure.

“Hi,” Minjun greeted in a whisper, his expression sheepish, his cheeks tinged a slight-pink.

When he had finally gathered his courage, Minjun had knocked on the door. Then knocked again, and again, but it still went unanswered. At first, he was confused since Nickhun mentioned that Taecyeon had already finished his recording for the day. Afterwards, not knowing when Taecyeon would be home but not wanting to wait outside the door either, he had no choice but to call on Taecyeon’s manager. His manager then contacted the hotel’s security to inform them of his approval to let Minjun in. Which was how he ended up sitting cross-legged on the floor by the bed. Taecyeon’s bed. It felt wrong for him to be sitting on the bed considering their circumstances and there were no other places for him to sit. He was now seriously considering giving the hotel that feedback he had been thinking about for the past 2 hours, the one about having at least a chair in their rooms. Especially now that he feels a little ridiculous with Taecyeon looming over him. Pulling off his earpiece, he ignored the music that was still playing as he forced himself to look up at the mammoth of a guy still standing by the doorway.

“I- you- “Taecyeon frowned, “what are you doing here?”

“Oh,” realization hit him like a freight train. “Did- did you just finish your recording? You must be tired,” he stammered as he started to push himself off the ground, looking at anywhere except for Taecyeon. His cheeks were definitely burning hot by then. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you. I’ll leave you to rest,” he continued jabbering as he hastily gathered his things.

Taecyeon hurried over to him in a few large strides. “No, no. I don’t mean that,” he reassured as he bent down to pull the bag that Minjun was lifting off the ground. Their hands lingered on the bag as their eyes met. “Stay,” he ordered, letting go of the bag and pushing Minjun by the shoulders back into his sitting position on the ground. “I just wasn’t expecting you here.” Especially not after yesterday.

Minjun hesitantly sat back down and Taecyeon joined him, leaning his back on the wall across from Minjun. He straightened his legs, appearing to relax them when all he wanted was to feel closer to the other. If Minjun had straightened his legs too, their ankles would have touched. However, to Taecyeon’s frustrations, he was sitting cross-legged again, his shoulders hunched and eyes downcast as he watched his fingers playing with the carpet. The air grew awkward as Taecyeon watched Minjun who was looking at his fingers. He had not felt this awkward with Minjun since the first night they roomed together back in their dorm days.

“Taecyeon-ah…” Minjun finally broke the silence, eyes still downcast, “we need to talk.”

“Yeah… I know,” Taecyeon agreed.

Silence ensued.

“Have you eaten?” Taecyeon this time. “I brought some food back,” he continued as he reached for the bag he had placed between them. Minjun appeared to contemplate for a few seconds before throwing him an accusatory look. He winced. It was obvious what he was doing and Minjun knew it too. He was dodging again. He sighed and leaned back against the wall, the bag all but forgotten. “ Alright. Let’s lay it out then.”

Minjun stared silently at him as if deciding if he really would stay or run away while Taecyeon tried hard not to squirm under the intense gaze. After what felt like forever, he finally asked in a quiet voice,” yesterday, do you really mean it?”

Taecyeon straightened his back and met Minjun’s stare head on, “yes.”

This time it was Minjun who squirmed before finally looking away upon hearing Taecyeon’s answer. He folded in his legs and held them to his chest, resting his chin on his knees.

“Why me? Why now?” he whispered to his toes.

Taecyeon sighed and scooted closer to Minjun, his left leg folded at the knees while his right leg laid straight by Minjun’s side, effectively boxing the other in between him and the bed. He held out his left hand, palm up, and waited patiently. Minjun looked at it and hesitated before placing his own in it. Taecyeon closed his fist, before covering both hands with his other and giving a little squeeze.

“It’s not just now. It has always been you; before, now and I suspect in the future too. I’m not even sure when it really started. At first, what I felt for you was just curiosity. Then, it turned into jealousy and now, an outright obsession. Yesterday, when I saw you in his arms, all I see was red. The rational part of me knows there was nothing between the two of you except for brotherhood. But the possessive part of me couldn’t help lashing out as if it has lost you. Because of that, I have hurt you and for that I am so, so, sorry. Please…” Taecyeon bent his head a fraction to look into Minjun’s eyes with a small, repented smile, “forgive me?”

“I- I’m not angry. Shocked? Yes. Disappointed? Yes. Hurt? Hell, yes. But what I want more – need more - right now is just to understand. Why? How?” Minjun grasped Taecyeon’s hand, willing him to understand the turmoil in his heart.

Taecyeon studied those dark hazel eyes which had gone a little watery before closing his own eyes. He straightened his back and started tracing Minjun’s slender fingers, trying to organize his thoughts.

“Remember when Nickhun first introduced us?” He started, a small smile gracing his lips at the fond memory. Minjun’s chin left his knees as he looked up and nodded, his expression confused. Taecyeon reached out to push the bangs out of Minjun’s eyes, absently thinking he would need a trim. “I said in an interview somewhere before that the first thing I noticed about you was how broad your shoulders were,” They both laughed and Taecyeon felt relieved at seeing a smile on those full lips. “But I also noticed how slender your waist were, how you were drowning in that hoodie you were wearing – was it even yours?” he teased again.

Minjun blushed and laughed, feeling relaxed enough to lower his legs and sit cross-legged again, his knees resting on Teacyeon’s thighs. “Yeah, it was mine.”

Taecyeon smiled and picked up where he left off, “- and how your body was just crying out to be hugged and protected.”

Minjun blushed harder but did not comment.

“Honestly, I didn’t really think much of you then, only a sense of curiosity every time Nickhun mentioned you or tell stories of his little adventures with you. At times, he would portray you as a cool rebel who was fearless and unheeding of the company’s rules. Other times, I would hear of how passionate and determined you were on making your singer/song-writer dream a reality. Yet, every time I see you, I only see this willowy individual who was drowning in yet another piece of sweater or the scarf wrapped around his neck, looking so vulnerable and tired with bags under his eyes. The stark contrast between what I see and what I hear intrigued me as to which one was the real you. So, I asked Nickhun and Jo Kwon, since you were close to him too, to invite you along whenever we hang out together. I needed more time with you to figure out who you really were. Only, every time you came along, you were always quiet and looked so uncomfortable that after a while, I figured you resented me.”

Hearing that, Minjun briskly squeezed his hand, his body jerking in his eagerness to deny but Taecyeon stopped him. “I know now it was just your nature around people you are not close with. And I also learned along the way how hard it was to get close to you,” he added with a teasing smirk. Minjun raised to the bait and shoved his shoulder lightly. He chuckled before going back to being serious. “Then I heard you sang. I think that was when it happened. I was so mesmerized by how otherworldly your voice sounded that for days, all I could her was your voice playing over and over in my head. It wasn’t long before I felt inadequate in your presence because of my lack of real talent. I hated feeling that way and as a result, I avoided you at every turn, even backing out of all the hang outs that I knew you would be in.” He suddenly felt fingers caressing his right cheek and looked up to see concern marring Minjun’s face. He wondered what expression he was wearing on his face for Minjun to think that he needed to be comforted. “The more I avoided you though, the more I grew envious of the people who were graced by your friendship. I felt inferior to your friends, especially the ones you called your ‘music friends’. Doo-joon, I know how chained at the hip you were with him. You went absolutely nowhere without him and I saw how devastated you were when he could not debut together with us after Hot Blood. Junho, Daehun, Jo Kwon, Jinwoon and even all those guys outside of JYP. They were all guys with amazing vocals, just like you. I, on the other hand, didn’t have that. Eventually, I grew envious of Nickhun too. Like me, he wasn’t in the same dorm as you and his singing, at the time, was mediocre. Plus, you guys had a language barrier! Whereas I could understand you perfectly fine! So, I figured if I were to snatch him from you or get even closer to him, you’d notice me or eventually follow suit and get close to me too. The plan wasn’t that hard, since Nickhun and I were already friends and I genuinely liked him. As a friend, of course,” Taecyeon felt the need to add even though Minjun would have never misunderstood. “It was an move, I know, and I regretted it as soon as that plan backfired and you guys grew distant. Afterwards, I figured my only option was to prove myself to you, to be ‘cooler’ then you. So, I followed the ‘coolest’ guy around then.”

“Jay-hyung,” they both chorused and laughed light-heartedly. For a moment the tension in the room dropped.

“Yes, Jay-hyung,” Taecyeon repeated after their laughter died down. “Not only did I learn how to dance by training with him, but also how to be ‘cool’ by watching him,” he chuckled,” in addition to being funny and attracting attention as well. After all that, it was maddening when I heard you were going to debut with 2AM instead. I thought all my efforts were moot since we would have even lesser time together. You have no idea how elated I was when Jinyoung-hyung announced he had switched Jo Kwon with you and you’d be debuting with us.”

“I clearly remembered your expressionless face though,” Minjun teased. At the same time, he nudged at Taecyeon’s thighs to signal that he wanted to stretch his legs.

Taecyeon scooted over to Minjun’s side and leaned his back against the bed too, leaving their hands with their fingers intertwined resting between them on the rug-covered floor. “I totally wanted to jump around but it would’ve been ridiculous considering we weren’t that close then. So, I had to control my expression. I swear it was extremely hard,” he argued. “It was even harder when I found out we would room together. I had to refrain myself from hugging you and twirling you around since you looked so awkward.” He chuckled as Minjun looked embarrassed, clearly reminiscing that night too. “I totally expected you to room with Junho since you guys were almost inseparable, or Chansung, since he was your previous roommate and was still clingy to you.”

“I totally thought you were gonna room with Jay-hyung or Khun too, honestly,” Minjun cut in.

Taecyeon nodded in acknowledgement. “Even then, I was still trying to find what I could excel in. I thought I could rap but you had already proven to be a better rapper than me in Hot Blood. You were the best during the trial round without even practicing and was the first few to pass the self-written lyrics round. Personally, I think Jinyoung-hyung didn’t give you any lines when we debuted for fear of you over-shadowing everyone else since you excel in both rapping and singing. You proved him right during all of your solos now, didn’t you,” he asked, proud of Minjun’s achievements. Minjun just slapped abashedly at his shoulder without saying a word. “I thought I could fare better in dancing. Not the best, since Wooyoung and Junho already took care of that. Only, you weren’t a bad dancer yourself. Your freestyling was really good. It’s just choreographed dancing that you have problems with. Even then, you put in so many hours of practice that I knew I couldn’t win you at that too. It felt like I could never catch up to you or be worthy of you. Then suddenly, Jay-hyung had to leave. Though I was sad since he was truly like a brother to me, to all of us, I was more scared of the team falling apart. Thank god we stuck it out.” Minjun beamed and it was such a beautiful sight that Taecyeon could not help smiling himself. “Right around that time, I was given a chance to act and I discovered I was really good at it. I thought that was my chance to prove myself and so I put all my energy in it. Still, I was greedy and wanted to show you I could do even more. So, I started OkCat. I thought it was a ridiculous idea at first, that you’d certainly mock me for it, but when you started buying my products too, I was over the moon. It was short-lived though, because, then you started doing your solos and with every solo it felt like you were slipping from my fingers again. To make it worse, you started producing our albums too. It was like a double-edged sword since I was proud of you but scared that you would leave me in the dust again.” Taecyeon felt a squeeze before Minjun’s thumb started drawing circles on the back of his palm. “I fought hard to produce our current album, even though your song was no doubt better, not to challenge you, but to regain my confidence and feel worthy of being with you again. I know it’s ridiculous since you never looked down on me or flaunt your singing ability from the time we met. You even gave me vocal coaching and singing tips from time to time. It was just my own insecurity. I wanted – needed- to be on the same level as you. It took me so long to realise that in my effort to be worthy of you, I was only pushing you away. I should have just manned up in order to have you. And so, I did. That day I came over with Nickhun? I went up to you and asked you to be mine.”

“Oh. So, that was you asking me to be yours? I would have never guessed,” Minjun sneered.

“Well…” Taecyeon scratched the back of his neck, feeling embarrassed, ” I tried, anyway. I thought you’d understand. So when I saw you with Junho, it felt like my years of effort just went down the drain. I was so frustrated and angry and- and- defeated that I just exploded. I shouldn’t have done that, shouldn’t have forced it on you that way.” He grasped Minjun’s hand between his palms, brought it up to his lips and pressed a kiss to Minjun’s knuckles. “I am truly, deeply, sorry.” He felt Minjun tensed in shock but refused to let go. Instead, he rested his forehead on Minjun’s knuckles. “I really want this, Minjun-ah…” he pleaded, bracing himself for the other’s answer.

Minjun pulled at their hands and Taecyeon let go of one hand while his other still stayed entwined with Minjun’s, his heart cracking with every passing second. Minjun folded his legs again in what Taecyeon now associated as his defensive position whenever he felt threatened or vulnerable. He placed their entwined hands on his knee, with Taecyeon’s hand on top, and rested his chin on them. He had a pointy chin and it was digging into the back of his hand but Taecyeon would sooner severe his hand before asking him to move.

“I want this too,” he whispered to his toes again,” but…”

“I understand,” Taecyeon conceded as he began to untangle his fingers.

“No, you certainly don’t,” Minjun objected, strengthening his hold. “I let you speak until you’re done, didn’t I?”

Taecyeon nodded silently, surprised at his sudden outburst.

“Now let me speak my part, and don’t jump to conclusions before I end,” he warned, his eyes alight with determination, his lips set in a grim line.

“Cuute!” Taecyeon thought but since he still valued his life, he nodded again without saying a word.

Minjun appeared relieved and slowly rested his cheek on Taecyeon’s hand, his head facing his way. “Damn, now he’s acting like a cat,” he mused, refraining the smile that was pulling at his lips, forcing himself to be serious.

“I have this box – this, umm… chest -like a treasure chest- in my head where I store all my bad memories. It’s my way of coping whenever something bad happens. I would compartmentalize them so that I’ll feel only a fraction of the hurt, the pain. It allows me to go on with life instead of staying depressed. Sometimes, some memories get stored for so long that I would totally forget about them. Do you understand?” he asked, lifting his cheek off Taecyeon’s hand a little.

While Minjun was talking, Taecyeon was busy being enthralled by his ethereal beauty. He admired the deep hazel darkness of Minjun’s eyes as Minjun looked back at him, the delicate thinness of his eyelashes, the sharp downward curve of his nose, the fullness of his lips as he worried the bottom lip between his teeth, and the way he adorably cocked his head sideways. He had to mentally shake himself to keep his train of thoughts from straying and to answer Minjun's question. “Yeah, I get what you mean,” he croaked before clearing his throat.

Minjun smiled in satisfaction as he laid his head down again, slightly rubbing into Taecyeon’s hand in his effort to get more comfortable. Taecyeon had to bite down on his cheeks to keep himself from swooning. He half expected Minjun to purr right then and was a tad disappointed when he just continued his story. “Before one of our comeback stages the other day, I had a talk with Nickhun. I was worried about you since you were acting so strange and I thought he would know since he was the closest to you.”

Taecyeon nodded to indicate he remembered.

Minjun went on, “he told me the answer lies in a conversation I had with him when we were trainees. For the life of me, I could not recall this conversation and whenever I tried to search my memories, I almost had a panic attack. I was confused at first but after you left me yesterday, I realized that the memory of that conversation must be locked in with the other bad memories in that chest. However, If I were to open it, I would not only recover one particular memory, I will experience every bad memory from the very first one I stored in it. That was why my mind kept stopping me from opening it. It was also why I kept deluding myself that all you ever wanted was a friendship. I was so scared of re- experiencing all that anguish that I refused to except that we can be – that you wanted - anything more.” Minjun looked apologetic but Taecyeon shook his head with a reassuring smile. “However, after yesterday, I knew the only chance I have of ever understanding what was happening between us was to see that memory. Although by this time I was determined to open the chest, I had buried it so deep in my mind that it took time and all of my focus to search for it in my mind’s labyrinth. I also had to fight with my own instincts to keep the lid of that chest shut. And since I was too caught up in my internal struggle, I was oblivious to what was happening around me in reality.”

“Nickhun told me about that,” Taecyeon commented,” he said you didn’t even move when Chansung picked you off the floor and placed you on the bed.”

“Ahhh… So that was how I ended up on the bed,” Minjun snickered. “Poor them, I must’ve freaked them out.”

“No . They almost lost their mind with worry. Especially after you suddenly had a panic attack not long after,” Taecyeon reasoned, a hint of reprimand in his voice.

“Ohh... That... When I finally found and opened the chest, I let out the most painful memories first. It was of my father’s death.” His voice grew quieter the more he explained and he shuddered as if relieving the memory again.

Taecyeon nudged Minjun’s elbow to jerk him out of the memory before pulling their entwined hands from under his cheek and pulling Minjun along with them, until he rested his back against his chest. Taecyeon then untangled their fingers before circling his arm over Minjun’s head and resting it on his waist. With his other hand, he claimed Minjun’s now empty one and entwined their fingers again. Minjun let Taecyeon man-handle him, nuzzling deeper into Taecyeon’s chest and relishing in the comfort he was providing. When he felt comfortable enough and was ready, he continued with his recount. “But I get to relieve some sweet memories too,” he said with a bitter smile. “I remember how you guys stayed up all night to comfort me, even helping out with some of the chores. I also remember you, Wooyoung, Chansung, Changmin, Seulong, and Jo Kwon carrying my father’s coffin as if you guys were my real brothers. Not to mention how your families travelled all the way to Daegu to visit.” He gave a little sniff and Taecyeon tightened his hold further. “I’m alright.” Minjun reassured him as he patted Taecyeon’s chest with his free hand. “But I digress. I should get back to the topic now. From the start, the moment Nickhun introduced us to each other, I knew I could never consider you a friend. We were like mirror opposites. You were like this unreachable person that I could only dream of being. You dwarfed me in so many ways on top of the physical. Wherever you go, you were the center of attraction, the heart of the show, shining with a confidence that was overflowing. I, on the other hand, was always doubting myself, always uncomfortable in front of new people or the camera. You became the epitome of what I tried so hard to be but could not ever be. I never meant to be aloof with you but whenever I was in your presence, I was so afraid of making a wrong move that I would just freeze up. Yet still, I was elated whenever I found out you would hang out with us, with me. That was, until that time when you started avoiding me. I thought you had finally realized how unworthy I was to be by your side.”

Hearing the sadness in his voice, Taecyeon started rubbing the slender waist under his hand. “When Nickhun started hanging out with you more, I thought he agreed with you. I never fought for him because I thought I could never win you. You befriended people so easily and were so likable that he would never leave you for me. Then you became so fixated with Jay-hyung to the point that I suspected you were infatuated. And it hurts. Every time I saw you worshiped him, a part of me just died. I thought I could get my reprieve when I would debut with 2AM, but that hope was dashed when Jinyoung-hyung replaced me. I had to witness you flirting with Jay-hyung at every turn. I-” he faltered when Taecyeon suddenly started drawing designs on his waist. “I was even speculating about leaving the group and everything else; my dreams, my years of hard work, behind. It felt like I could never surpass Jay-hyung in your eyes no matter how much I tried. When I found out we would room together, I was terrified. Terrified that now that we are spending almost every waking and even sleeping hours together, you would discover how much more of an awkward turtle I was. Inevitably, I retreated further into myself. Sometimes I see you trying to reach out but I would retract further because I was so scared that my feelings for you would increase and the fall would be harder, the pain hurting more. To avoid being hurt, I decided to immerse myself in my music, to ignore you and not think about you and him anymore. To make it worse, when we debuted, I had no lines. My self-confidence plummets even further. I felt useless, worthless, like I had no place in the team.”

“I’m sorry.” Taecyeon rested his chin on Minjun’s shoulder and embraced him tightly, rocking him side to side. He hated the vulnerability he could hear in his voice. He hated himself more for not realizing Minjun’s pain earlier.

“When Jay-hyung left, I had no time to grieve because of the immense pressure that I felt. Even though we had agreed to not have a leader, I was still the eldest. I know my dongsaengs, especially the younger three, would look to me for guidance. I have problems taking care of  my one and only younger brother properly, how can I protect another five? Especially with all of my anxiety and low self-confidence. Still, I tried hard. I wanted to fight for us. So I disciplined myself to push all my feelings aside, my sadness at Jay-hyung’s departure and my feelings for you, and just focus on our members. I know I am not the kind to be a strong-headed leader so I left that up to you. But I could be the comforting and nurturing one, the one the dongsaeng’s can turn to when they need to complain or relieve their stress.” Taecyeon nodded in agreement and Minjun felt Taecyeon’s sideburns and 5 o’clock shadow grazing his cheek.

“For a while, it worked out well. We were able to move past the scandal and Jay-hyung could even return to Korea to continue his work. Until one day, my father passed away. I became depressed. The horrible comments and threats circling the net didn’t help either. At one point, my mind decided that it would not take any more pain. That was when the chest was created as a defense mechanism. I shoved everything into that chest and locked it shut. The pain of my father’s passing lessened and I totally forgot my feelings for you. With everything locked away, I was able to stand up again, to gain my confidence and focus on my passion as sure-footed as I was before I met you. However, instincts had me wary of you. It kept me from getting too close to you because it knew you equate to hurt even if doesn’t remember why anymore. Then, just when I finally found myself, when I finally thought my fortress was strong enough, you shook its very foundation; asking, forcing me to spend more time with you. Still, I agreed under the façade that I care for you as a member. But you tore it all down when you kissed me.” Minjun turned to face Taecyeon who had been silent for a while. “I am scared, Taec,” he whispered,” so scared of falling down again because this time, if I fall, I don’t think I could pick myself up again. I am afraid I would self-destruct. Then there would be nothing left of me to salvage. I really, really don’t want that.”

Taecyeon turned his head to look into Minjun’s eyes, causing their noses to touch. He saw the fear in them and had to really consider his next few words. “I cannot predict or control what will happen in the future. So I don’t want to give you empty promises. But hear this, as long as I am able, I swear to you, I would not let you fall. I would not let a single tear leave these eyes.” He caressed the skin under Minjun’s eyes, feeling Minjun shudder a little at his touch. “Please… give me a chance.”

“I can’t – I don’t- I don’t know…” Minjun murmured, feeling Taecyeon’s hot breath ghosting on his lips.

“Just let me,” Taecyeon drawled.

He could feel Taecyeon’s intense gaze on his lips, understanding the double meaning behind the other’s words. “We…can’t.” He gulped.

“Why not?” Taecyeon traced Minjun’s bottom lip with his thumb and Minjun inhaled sharply. The air around them charged as the temperature rose.“Because of the kids?” He then proceeded to rub their noses together, his eyes closed.

“Mm-hmm,” Minjun answered with a gasp.

“Let me worry about them,” Taecyeon whispered low as he let his fingers wonder to Minjun’s neck, feeling the staccato beat of his pulse. He opened his eyes to see that Minjun’s had darken to an almost black. His lips were parted and his breath came in short pants, blowing hot breath against Taecyeon’s cheek. Taecyeon’s brain short-circuited at the tempting sight.

“But-” Minjun tried to speak but his throat and lips were too dry. Taecyeon saw Minjun’s Adam’s apple bobbing as he gulped. He had expected him to his lips next, but as he followed the appendage with a hungry gaze, he did not expect it to brush against his own lips. The reigns holding his control in check almost slipped as he growled. “,” he thought, “I’m scaring him away again.”

Minjun was taken aback when Taecyeon suddenly growled and his eyes hardened, much like the day before. Only this time, he was not afraid. He saw Taecyeon’s face changed as if he expected him to flee but instead, Minjun surprised him by leaning in and slowly closing his eyes, his gaze never leaving Taecyeon’s until his lids fluttered shut. Then he pouted his lips a little, leaving a hair’s breadth between their lips and waiting for Taecyeon to make a decision.

Taecyeon almost pounced onto what was so readily offered to him, so tempted to mark and claim as greedily as he did before. “Minjun…” he warned, pulling hard on his reigns, wanting Minjun to be absolutely sure. Minjun opened his eyes and silently turned his upper body so that they were face to face. Taecyeon let him go, putting his hands on the other’s waist when he settled down again. He waited for Minjun to speak, to refuse him, but felt robbed of his breath as Minjun slid his hands up his chest to his nape, before circling his arms around his neck and pulling his head down. He then presented his lips again just as he did before. Caressing Minjun’s jaw, Taecyeon closed the distance between them. He felt Minjun tensed and ordered himself to wait, just pressing his lips lightly onto the other. He was determined to make this kiss better than their first, maybe even make Minjun remember this as their first instead of the previous one. So, he pulled harder on his restraints, forcing himself to be gentle when all he wanted was to ravage. Only when he felt Minjun relaxing against his chest did he move, peppering little kisses on Minjun’s lips.

Minjun felt the soft, gentle kisses against his lips and felt a maelstrom of feelings warring in his heart. He expected the hard, forceful kiss like the previous day, not this gentle coaxing. It made him want to pull Taecyeon closer and relish the kiss when his instincts told him to push away and save himself. It made him feel stupid for ever holding back, for refusing to let them have this beautiful thing. Yet, he was still afraid that he was making a mistake. After a few more kisses though, he felt himself letting go, a tear escaping his closed lid.

Taecyeon was surprised when he felt a lone tear trailing down Minjun’s cheeks and his body trembled. He continued peppering kisses on the other’s lips as he slid the hand on Minjun’s waist up to the small of his back, caressing it as he tried to soothe the other. Soon, the tears stopped and he had Minjun melting into him. He deepened the kiss ever so slightly, on his upper lip before doing the same to the lower. He bit Minjun’s lower lip softly and pulled it into his mouth before on it again, causing the other to moan. The sound was like music to his ears. It made his blood raging hot as it flowed down south. Letting the lip go, he the seam between Minjun’s lips, asking for permission. Minjun tensed again as he hesitated. Alternating between more kisses, bites and on his lips, Taecyeon tried to soothe as well as seduce. Eventually, Minjun relaxed again and slowly parted his lips. Taecyeon wanted so much to just swoop in and thoroughly claim that sweet, sweet mouth. However, he continued his seduction, Minjun’s lips and giving them small bites that he soothed with a . It wasn’t long before Minjun grew impatient. He tightened his arms around Taecyeon’s neck while a hand fisted into Taecyeon’s hair, pulling him closer. He felt Taecyeon’s smirk against his lips before Taecyeon plunged in and deepened the kiss.

“Nnnhhh,” Minjun moaned as Taecyeon on his tongue.

“!” Taecyeon suddenly pulled apart, pushing Minjun to an arms distance.

Minjun’s head whirled at the sudden loss of contact, needing a minute to regain his equilibrium. “What- what’s wrong?” he panted, still breathless from the kiss, but already fearing the worst. Is Taecyeon regretting it now that they’ve kissed? Did he do it wrong? Was he bad at it?

Taecyeon ran a hand through his hair, frustration written all over his face, his breath still rapid from the kiss too. “Those sounds you make, I can’t control myself when you do that.”

Minjun slumped in relief. “Okay,” he said with a smile, thinking that Taecyeon was simply too adorable. He reached out to caress Taecyeon’s cheek but the other caught his hand.

“Not now,” Taecyeon warned, his voice low. The emotion in his eyes were so raw and intense that Minjun gulped. “It’d be bad if you touch me now.”

Minjun agreed and he must have shown fear on his face for Taecyeon kissed the hand in his grip, as if to comfort him. When he looked back up, his eyes had soften slightly.

“We have to tell the rest.” Minjun offered as a form of distraction, though he started worrying his bottom lip with his teeth since it was a real problem.

Taecyeon watched Minjun’s red and swollen lips distractedly. He did that. He made those lips red and swollen. “What do you want to tell them?”

“Ummm…” Minjun his lips.

“Stop that,” Taecyeon rebuked.

“Ah, sorry,” Minjun blushed, sheepish.

Taecyeon ran a hand down his face. “No, I’m sorry. I should stop thinking about it.”

Minjun had the cheek to laugh but it was merry and full of happiness that Taecyeon found himself following suit. “I’ll tell them. You don’t have to worry about it,” he said as their laughter receded.

“Ummm…” Minjun started pulling at the carpet.

Taecyeon put a finger under his chin and lifted his face to meet his eyes. “What is it? From now on, I want to know everything. I don’t want any more misunderstandings. And I promise I won’t get angry.”

Minjun contemplated for a while, pulling at the carpet strands, then absently righting Taecyeon’s collar, before finally speaking up. “I can’t- I don’t- I’m afraid of this hurting you,” he gave Taecyeon and apologetic look as he squeezed Taecyeon’s hand, “but I don’t want to put a name to this first.” He indicated the space between them. “This is all so new to me. Can we just take our time and go with the flow then see where this goes?”

Taecyeon had to admit that he was disappointed and it must have shown since Minjun grasped his hand tighter. However, he understood that Minjun had a deep-seated fear of being hurt again and that fear could not be so easily rid by a mere kiss, no matter how amazing and hot the kiss was. So he sighed and surrendered. He had to pick his battles and this one, it was better for Minjun to win. “Alright, we’ll see where this goes. Does that mean you don’t want to tell them anything?”

“No, I don’t like keeping anything from them. Besides, they will take one look at us and figured something is going on. We can never fool them. And they need reassurance for our concert tomorrow. Maybe we could just tell them that we’ve had a long talk to resolve our differences and now we’ve made up,” Minjun suggested.

“That was one hell of a make up,” Taecyeon smirked, earning him a shove from Minjun.

He laughed heartily as he trapped Minjun’s waist in his arms. “So, are you staying here tonight?”

“Yeah,” Minjun blushed, looking at his hand on Taecyeon’s shoulder. “I didn’t book a room.”

Taecyeon froze as realization hit. ! So Minjun was so determined for them to reconcile that he did not even book a room as a back-up plan. He would have kissed him again if not for his raging libido. Instead he hugged him to his chest, trying to relay his gratitude with the gesture. Minjun understood and patted his back until Taecyeon felt calm again.

That night, Minjun lay cuddled in Taecyeon’s arms - regretfully clothed since they did not want any accident that night and Minjun was too tired from the flight anyway- his head resting on his chest. Taecyeon listened to his soft snores just like he used to do when they shared a room. As he drifted to sleep, accompanied by the beat of Minjun’s heart against his abdomen, he could not help feeling content, as if his world has finally righted itself and he was where he was meant to be.

Epilogue

“So, it was just a day?” Nickhun asked, incredulous. He stole another chip from Chansung, who was sprawled on the bed beside him, and popping it in his mouth

“I don’t believe it.” Junho, ever the sceptic, from where he was lying on Chansung’s back. The hotel really needed some chairs in their rooms. The bed was too small for the six of them to pile on. Although that fact never deterred them from doing so.

“You guys fight worse than children.” That was Wooyoung, huddled against Nickhun’s other side.

“I told you, we weren’t fighting. It was just an argument about something that had happened long ago which I couldn’t recall. And Taecyeon was pissed because I had forgotten all about it. But we talked and now we’re fine.” Minjun skirted the truth since his dongsaengs could sniff out an obvious lie. Plus, he was not a good liar.

“I call bull.” Chansung managed to smirk around a mouth full of chips.

“Well, we fought but then realized it’s actually because we love each other. So, we kissed and made up. We’re a couple now,” Taecyeon declared with a hint of sarcasm.

Minjun felt faint as a pin-drop silence fell upon the room. Seconds ticked by before his dongsaengs burst out laughing. “ you, Taecyeon! I almost died!” he thought as he gave Taecyeon a murderous glare.

Taecyeon smiled his Cheshire cat smile and shrugged nonchalantly before reaching forward to steal a chip from Chansung too.

“What the hell, Taecyeon! If anyone were to be with Minjun, it’d be Junho. Can’t you see the Junbros tag trending online?” Nickhun argued.

“Hey!” Chansung exclaimed, feeling offended even though it had nothing to do with him.

Wooyoung suddenly sat up, pushing Nickhun away. “No way! Jun-hyung is mine!” He declared fiercely to everyone’s surprise.

“Wooyoun-ah…” Minjun started.

“I won’t let any one of you have him!” He continued, pushing himself between Taecyeon and Minjun.

Only Taecyeon realized the pained expression on Nickhun’s face before he quickly wiped it away. The others were too busy clinging to Minjun, laughing, teasing Wooyoung or feeling embarrassed. Taecyeon made a mental note to check in with his other members now that his mind had cleared. There were more issues to settle between them.

~THE END~

Phew! That was a long one, wasn't it? Sorry if you got bored by the lengthy dialogues. I tried to compress 8 yrs of history from 2 diff perspectives into one chapter. blegh!

I hope the ending doesn't feel rushed and that you guys like it. I didn't want them to rush into a relationship since it would be unrealistic. They both thought they were straight their whole life, and this is their first time being with a guy, so they need some time to get used to it before giving it an official name.

So here it is!! Your belated christmas/advanced new year present!!

I had actually wanted to upload this on christmas but I didnt expect how bz I would be and how hard it was to write this chapter with all the history. Plus, I had NEVER written a kissing scene before. So I have major problems thinking of words to describe them. You are welcome to give me feedback and pointers. hehehehe! Feel free to ask me questions if there is anything you dont understand from this chapter or the others.

As you can see, this is the last chap. I am considering doing a sequel. Should I? or maybe just do one-shots? Idk... Anyway, writing this was a real rollercoaster ride and I thank you all for being on it with me! Much love, hugs and kisses! 😍😍

Now, I may accidentally miss out some info since there are so many, but here goes.

I mentioned Hot Blood a lot so you should get the idea to watch them. You'd know from there that the boys are from different levels at the dorm, levels 4 and 6. basically, Taec and Minjun are from diff floors. taec with Khun, Woo and Junho. Minjun with Jay and chan. Also, you'd see that Minjun was always with Doo-joon and after the elimination, he hugged Doo-joon the longest, even went back to hugging him after everyone else was done. From this vid, you can see at the end that Minjun immidiately went to Doo-joon after the interview was done. So they were clearly still close even after Doo-joon left JYP [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qR1GbgQa2Y] Also, 2PM is known to be close with Beast from all the vids on yt. Just search them.

Watch Hot Blood, Wild Bunny, and Idol Army Show to see Taec swooning over Jay. TaecKhunJay was the popular trio then and a lot of ppl ship the TaecJay couple. I am neutral about Jay leaving since I stan 2PM after he left anyway. So dont kill me.

This is the post from Minjun's uncle about 2PM and JYPN helping out during Minjun's dad's funeral. Here's a link to the full report http://omonatheydidnt.livejournal.com/8363081.html

and this is the disgusting posts from netizens. Kudos to JYP En for defending their idols tho. Here's the full link https://www.soompi.com/2015/06/03/netizen-makes-insults-suggesting-death-of-jun-ks-parents-jyp-entertainment-takes-legal-action/

Taec's first impression of Minjun. Full link: http://2pmalways.tumblr.com/post/151625730690/trans-2pm-frau-oct-2016-interview

Taec mentioned on his Take Care of My Fridge and Minjun mentioned in Yoo Hee Yeol's Sketchbook that Minjun had written a song for their most recent comeback. But Taecyeon's Promise/I'll be was chosen. Not being bias but I would think it was because Minjun relented. He had produced 2 albums , No.5 and Go Crazy, after all.

I think that's all of my sources. Hit me up if you think I missed something.

Ok! Comments time!!

LastWaltz Thanks, Hun!! 😘😘 I try hard to make the story seem as real as possible. Glad that you love it!! 😄😄

peuleya Ahhh.. I see.. I couldn't make Nickhun be protective since I know he and taec are buddies. So It makes more sense that nickhun would side with taec. Chansung had been roommates with Minjun before their debut and the one Minjun hang out with the most amongst the members off camera. Also, he looks like the brooding type, if he wasnt acting maknae-ish. If you watch 2pm show, he alwasy clings to Minjun too and pamper him. He's also the strongest. So I thought he's a good bodyguard for Minjun  😅😅 As for junho, well, he's just a drama king. so he's there to exaggerate the situation 😂😂 Wooyoung has been pretty quiet lately, so that's how I potray him. Hope you love the Taeckay moments!!

EunM15 This is in exchange for your christmas present!! Hope you like it!! 😘😘 Thank you for being the most loyal reader and commentor!

last but not least, welcome to new subscribers!!

deCasindazoNe

Kimtatiq

hwootestjang

lilaciyma2689