Featuring Janhae, the Thai girl who became Taeyeon's co-model in promoting B-ing.

Now who ships JanTae? :D

Don't worry Locksmiths, it's still about TaeNy afterall! :3

Oh yes, it's a pretty long fic. I just don't feel like splitting it into two chapters.. So yeah. 

Enjoy! :3

 

Genre: Romance

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“Oh, you’re ready? I believe you remember to bring your passport, don’t you?”

Taeyeon shrugged as she walked to the living room of the dorm, pulling her suitcase.

“I heard that the weather in Thailand is currently pretty warm, even hot. Don’t forget to take your cap with you. It’ll protect you from the direct sun.”

The kid leader just sat quietly on the couch, listening to the loud, bubbly girl. She smiled a little when the latter occasionally laughed.

She’s not going but she’s the excited one.

“Call me as soon as you arrive there, okay? Take care.”

Taeyeon stood up after reading the message from manager oppa, saying that he was already downstairs. She stared at the smiling Tiffany for a moment, before hesitantly tapping her shoulder.

 

“I’m going, Pani-ah.”

 

Tiffany turned in surprise.

“Wait a minute, oppa,” she said to the man on the line. “Take care, Taeyeon-ah!” she exclaimed as she gave a tight hug to the shorter girl. Taeyeon hugged back and as soon as they let go of each other, Tiffany continued the call.

Taeyeon was walking to the door but she still could hear Tiffany’s voice.

 “I miss you too. You’ll join me soon in Cali, won’t you? Hmm. Great!”

Her hand was already on the door knob.

Tiffany’s voice was so soft. Softer than she had ever known.

“Love you too, Khun Oppa.”

 

BLAM.

 

And that was how finally Taeyeon walked out of the dorm.

 

***

 

Along the trip to Thailand for promoting a brand she advertised, Taeyeon could not stop thinking about many things. About one thing. Or about a certain girl. About Tiffany, to be exact.

What was Tiffany to her? What were they two?

What did Taeyeon herself actually feel? What did she actually want to do?

Why did Taeyeon have to feel like losing a part of her life everytime Tiffany talked or went with Nichkhun?

Who am I, after all?

She sighed and slightly shook her head everytime that thoughts, which frequently stressed her out, occured.

Kim Taeyeon, she never wanted to admit. Or she might be afraid to.

She was feared of the thoughts that she might have really fallen for Tiffany, so she kept denying it. She knew Tiffany was only interested in boys and considered Taeyeon as nothing but a best friend. Admitting her feelings might just destroy everything; her career, her friendship, or even her life.

She also realized that she could not be with Tiffany in every other way, but in a friendship way, and as working partners. They were not just meant to be. Taeyeon had more than once hoped that if she were to be reborn, she wanted to be born as a boy. That way, Tiffany could be hers.

And now that Tiffany had officially dated Nichkhun, which the whole world had figured out, Taeyeon was slowly but surely accepting the fact that they could be nothing more than best friends. Taeyeon wasn’t trying to let go of Tiffany, as she was never hers.

But she was trying really hard to erase her feelings for her, and replacing it with just sisterly love. A pure, sincere sisterly love. So that she could eventually be entirely happy for Tiffany and Nichkhun, or whoever she would date, or even married to.

And that thing, my friend, was damned difficult for Kim Taeyeon to do.

 

***

 

A young girl, around her early 20s, was walking back and forth restlessly.

She grabbed her phone tightly with her sweaty palms. Her heart was thumping and she kept trying hard to steady her breathing.

A Thai girl named Ployshompoo, or often called Janhae, never knew what good deeds she had done throughout her life, which made God allow her to finally meet and even to advertise a brand together with the global star, the million hearts’ idol, Kim Taeyeon of Girls’ Generation.

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, what should I do, how should I act, what should I say, how should I—keep calm, Ploy, keep calm. That’s right, breathe in, breathe out. Yeah you got yourself—

Just then her manager stepped in to the waiting room. “Jan, get ready. Kim Taeyeon’s arrived. Oh my God, you should see her. She’s even more gorgeous in person!”

It felt hard for her to breath as her head felt lighter. In her ears, the sound of her own heart beat was way louder than the fans’ crazy screams.

Just keep calm and be professional, Ploy.

 

THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP

 

Then it happened.

Her heart felt like stopping, the moment a blonde, petite, milky white skinned and babyfaced girl entered the same room as Janhae was in. And they were just, like, three meters apart.

Professional my .

 

“OH MY GOD IT’S KIM TAEYEON!!”

 

Janhae spontaneously exclaimed with an undescribable facial expression, which startled the shorter girl. Her face instantly turned bright red as soon as she realized what an embarassing action she had done. She was also extremely afraid that the superstar would despise her and feel disgusted with her, or the worst that she would not want to work with her.

Now who wants to be hated by their idol? No one.

But then, unexpectedly,  Kim Taeyeon bursted out into laughter, which left Janhae dumbfoundedly and embarassed, yet a bit relieved.

“I-I am so sorry, I’m sorry—“ Janhae bowed as she apologized in English.

Surprisingly, Taeyeon’s English wasn’t that bad. “Nah, it’s perfectly fine, umm..”

“I am P-Ployshompoo,” Janhae extended her hand.

“Sha- Shampoo what?” the idol knitted her eyebrows in confusion.

Janhae felt like screaming out loud when Taeyeon shook her hand; it was just so small, soft, and just—like how everyone knew, Taeyeon was really cute.

“Hello? Earth to Miss Shampoo?” Taeyeon laughed as she waved her hand in front of Janhae’s amazed face.

Janhae was slowly getting control of herself. “P-please just call me Janhae, Miss T-Taeyeon.”

“Okay, Miss Janhae. Now would you please quit the stuttering?” Taeyeon smiled, so friendly and innocent that Janhae felt like she had known her for years. “Please take good care of me!”

 

***

 

Everything was going surprisingly well for Janhae. Kim Taeyeon was a really good working partner. She was really professional, yet supportive and friendly, and not to mention funny and cute, which made Janhae comfortable and confident to be her co-model. She was beyond proud when Taeyeon said that she had done a good job.

During some breaks of the photoshoot, they talked about stuff, they even joked and got along well.

“You know you’re fun to be with, Miss Janhae,” Taeyeon said as she took a sip of drink, after laughing at the latter’s story.

“Please just call me Janhae or Jan, Miss Taeyeon.”

“Okay. Then just call me Taeyeon.”

“No, no. I shall stick to calling you Miss, since I’m younger than you.”

“Oh really? How old are you then?”

“I was born in 1995,” she shyly replied.

“Oh my gosh,” Taeyeon’s eyes popped open. “We’re six years apart.”

“Umm.. Apparently yeah. Is that a problem?”

“Nah, of course not,” Taeyeon shook her head. “But since you are much younger than me..”

 

“Miss Taeyeon and Miss Janhae! The break is only one minute left, please get prepared!” said the crew.

 

“What is it?” Janhae asked curiously as she stood up to get ready for the next photoshoot.

Taeyeon shrugged as she grinned.

“It just means that I have to take care of you better,” she winked before heading to the crews, leaving her co-model behind. Janhae was blushing like crazy. And Taeyeon, being the charming figure she was, knew Janhae would.

Taeyeon found that this Janhae girl was pretty interesting. Her reactions to Taeyeon’s teasing were also silly and funny to watch. And not to mention, she was cute enough to stare at. She could make Taeyeon forget about her problems for a while, although that eyesmiles of hers did remind her of.. No, she did not really want to mention the name which would bring the hundred thoughts and feelings back.

She sighed.

“Are you ready, Miss Taeyeon?” Janhae suddenly tapped her shoulders, smilingly. There was still a tint of pink in her cheeks.

Taeyeon smiled back as she nodded. “Let’s do our best, Jan.”

And as she had predicted, the girl blushed again as she lowered her face, full of wide smiles.

She’s cute. Maybe I can have a little fun with her while I’m here.

 

***

 

The photoshoots and some interviews were finally done.

“Good job, everyone! Thanks for today. We’ll meet again tomorrow at 9AM sharp. For tonight, please have a good rest! Good job!” the head of the crews exclaimed, followed by the other crews applause and cheers.

 

Taeyeon was really exhausted of having to smile every now and then, pretending that she was perfectly fine even though deep inside she could not help but think about Tiffany.

Sure, Janhae made her forget about Tiffany for a while, but everytime they had to focus on their job, the thoughts of her automatically came back. Having to be professional even though she was breaking inside, was really hard for Taeyeon.

Just as in cue, her phone vibrated and there was a call from Tiffany.

A part of Taeyeon was excited to hear her voice, while another part refused to, for the fear of missing Tiffany even more.

As the result, Taeyeon just miserably stared at Tiffany’s name on her phone screen. After the unanswered call disconnected and her phone screen dimmed out, Taeyeon still stared at it.

 

But without her knowing, there was a pair of worried eyes who had been watching her actions and examining her heartbreaking facial expressions.

The owner of the eyes later decided to cheer her working partner up.

“Miss Taeyeon!” she called.

Taeyeon put her phone in her bag, ready to go. “Yes, Janhae?”

“Do you still have any schedule after this?”

“I don’t think so. Why?”

“Since it’s still early..” Janhae took a look at her watch and it showed 10 PM. “Do you.. Do you want to take a stroll with me?” she asked hesitantly.

Taeyeon was pretty surprised with the blunt invitation. She did not know that the younger girl would have the nerve to say such things.

“If you mind then it’s okay –I mean, I’m sorry, I just want to show around -- a little bit of Thailand, it’s not like a date or something, no, I mean--” Janhae stuttered in panic. She started blaming herself for doing such a thing. Who was her to ask the global star out?

“It’s okay if you don’t want to, I- I just—“

Then she was silenced by a pat on her head. She looked up and almost fainted at the view; a smirking Taeyeon, close-up.

“Where are we going, Jan?”

Janhae exploded in red, red blush. was hanging open as she was speechless. She was so whipped and Taeyeon knew it.

 

***

 

Janhae really did a good job on being a tour guide. She took Taeyeon to some of Thailand’s famous tourist objects nearby. Fortunately for them, it was not really crowded since it was already late. They ate some Thailand street snacks too. They even took a selca in front of one the landmarks, which looked beautiful with the colourful lights on.

Taeyeon learned that Janhae was so bright, bubbly, and innocent. And yes, she was fun to be with.

All thanks to her, Taeyeon could have fun and completely forget about her troubles.   

“Wow, it comes out really good! I’ll surely treasure it for the rest of my life.” Janhae smiled happily as she looked at the photo. “Thank you so much, Miss Taeyeon.”

“Just call me unnie, Janhae-yah. That’s how we do in Korea. It’s been weird for me to be called Miss, actually.”

“O-Oh okay. Thank you very much, Taeyeon.. unnie!” she hesitantly yet cheerfully called.

“No, thank you, Janhae-yah.” Taeyeon said sincerely as she held the girl’s hands, which startled her. Janhae’s heart started thumping crazily when her eyes met Taeyeon’s beautiful onyx orbs. “Thanks for today. It’s been a while since I have real fun. I really need this, you know.”

“D-don’t mention it, unnie.” Janhae could not help but stare at the floor, since Taeyeon’s flawless face was just too much to handle. But her effort was useless when Taeyeon gently lifted her chin with her fingers.

“What can I do for you in return?” she smiled.

“Can you kiss me?” Janhae blurted out, literally speaking out her mind. And the second after she realized what she had said, she felt like killing herself. “NO, I MEAN---“

“Okay,” Taeyeon nodded nonchalantly.

“—WHAT?” Janhae’s eyes almost popped out of her eyes.

“I said it was okay.” Taeyeon smirked. “Now close your eyes.”

Janhae swallowed down , shutting her eyes tight.

She waited for the kiss.

 

But it never came.

 

“I’m sorry, Janhae-yah.”

 She opened her eyes and she could see Taeyeon’s heartbreaking face –exactly like what she had witnessed before.

She was disappointed for not getting the kiss, exactly, but she was more heartbroken to see Taeyeon’s sad smile. The idol’s lips might curve into a smile, but her eyes seemed like they were ready to cry anytime.

“.. Why are you sorry, Taeyeon unnie?”

“I’m sorry for doing this to you, after all of the things you have done for me.”

“Doing what? You did nothing wrong, unnie.”

“I did. I knew your feelings for me, and I gave you hopes although I know I can’t return yours,” Taeyeon said hoarsely, her face lowered. “The moment I saw your innocent face earlier made me realize of my mistake. I thought I could have fun by playing with your feelings –eventually I was wrong. I am sorry.”

Janhae was speechless. “I..”

“It’s alright if you want to hate me.”

“No, unnie, I can’t hate you, and I won’t.” Janhae smiled.

“But..”

“I did these things just because I wanted you to cheer up. I disliked seeing you so unhappy, unnie. And yes, I like you. I really like you. Either as a fan or as a girl, I really like you, Taeyeon unnie.” Janhae bluntly said, which made herself wonder where the hell she got the courage to do it. “But I don’t expect anything in return. I know who I am, and I know who you are; we live in different worlds, I am just no one, and we will never be together, nor will you return my feelings.”

“If you know that I can’t return your feelings.. Then why?”

Janhae shrugged. “It’s just.. Since I really like you, I sincerely want you to be happy. And if in this way you can forget about your problems and be cheerful –even if it’s just for a blink of eyes.. Then yes, I would do anything.”

This time, Taeyeon was the one who got silenced.

Janhae turned as she walked to a nearby fountain, leaving Taeyeon behind. “You know unnie, sometimes love isn’t really about possession. It’s about appreciation of one’s happiness. If I can make someone I love happy without having them, so be it. If they can be happy without me, then I’ll pray for them to always be.”

The younger girl’s words hit Taeyeon.

Janhae was just like her; she had an unrequited love. But unlike Taeyeon, she could still wish happiness for the one she loves. All Taeyeon thought about these whole time was her own happiness and her own feelings. She kept pitying herself to the point where she did not think anymore about Tiffany’s happiness, but only hers, herself and her.

She realized how stupid she had been and how she made the people around her worrying about her.  

And that moment, she felt like the grey clouds on her mind disappear. The tons of burden were lifted up from her chest, although there was still a tiny part that stung.

“Why are you so quiet, unnie? Did I say something wrong—“ Janhae was surprised when suddenly she felt warm embrace from behind; Taeyeon back hugged her. “U-unnie?”

And all she could hear was a soft voice, almost like a whisper; a really sincere one.

“Thank you very much, Janhae-yah. You’ve done so much more than you know.”

 

***

 

“So this is it?”

Taeyeon’s question woke Janhae up from her deep thinking. She stared at Taeyeon for a moment, before opening to speak, but then hesitantly closed it again.

“What is it, Jan? For a Janhae, you’ve been too quiet along the road.” Taeyeon knitted her eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”

“Umm.. Nothing.” Janhae replied.

Taeyeon sighed. “Okay, then. I’ll be going back to Korea now.. Thank you for everything, and I hope to see you again soon. Be a good girl here, okay?” she said as she ruffled the younger girl’s silky hair.

Taeyeon’s hand was already on the van knob when suddenly she felt Janhae grabbed her arm.

“Taeyeon unnie!” she called desperately.

“I know there’s something.. So tell me now.” Taeyeon smirked mischievously.

“I.. I don’t know how to say this but..” Janhae blushed hardly.

“Hmm?”

“I.. I..”

“You what?” Taeyeon’s face got closer, which only made the latter blushed even harder.

“No, I really can’t say this.. I can’t.”

“Say it or I’ll leave now.” Taeyeon insisted, as she was becoming curious.

“Can I.. Can I see you again, in the near future?”

Taeyeon shrugged, as she was not really certain about her schedule; it was manager oppa’s job.

“I don’t know, Jan.”

 “Oh, okay then..” Janhae sighed, disappointed.

“Is that all? I’m going now then, bye.”

“Bye unnie.. Take care..” Janhae weakly smiled, she was so sad at the thought of never meeting Taeyeon again.

Just when she thought Taeyeon would exit the van and never meet her again, the idol turned back to her with the question that had always been a dream to her;

“Can I have your number, Jan? I’ll call you later.”

***

 

Taeyeon was back to Girls’ Generation dorm.

Once again, all thanks to the Thai girl, she felt different than how she had felt when she had been about to go to Thailand. That time, she could answer all the questions that she had asked herself before.

She loved Tiffany. Yes, oh how she really did.

Since she loved her, she would like her to be happy. And loving her did not mean that they had to be lovers. As long as she could be by her side was enough for her. She had accepted the fact that they were only best friends, and that was all they could ever be.

Thus, Taeyeon decided to be the best of Tiffany’s best friends. She would try her best to make Tiffany happy, and she would always be there.

What had really changed from her mindset was; she did not wish Tiffany to return any of her love or feelings. As long as she was happy, Taeyeon would be satisfied.

And now she knew, what Tiffany was for her. She knew what the relationship between them really meant to her.

“I’m back, girls,” she said as she entered the dorm living room.

The girls greeted her and hugged her, and the most excited one was none other than her bright, cheerful best friend; Tiffany.

The relationship between Taeyeon and Tiffany was a home; where they could always come back to, where they felt comfortable with, where they could always share stories and warmth, and which would last eternally.

 

“Welcome home, Tae!” she exclaimed as she tightly embraced Taeyeon.

 

Taeyeon closed her eyes, smiling as she cherished the moment. “Yes, I’m home.”

 

 

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It's been a while since I last updated, right? Teehee. :]

Any of you miss me? :3

This is a classic excuse but, yeah, school really drives me crazy. It keeps me busy. No kidding.

 

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