I think this is the longest chapter I have ever written, and this is angst.

This is angst.

You.have.been.warned.

 

Genre: Romance, Angst

---

 

 

Alone in this slightly wide room unlike always

It’s over

Guess it’s over

The story that we made went in vain

We fell apart this easily

 

 

Tiffany took a deep breath.

The familiar, sweet fragrance of her all white room was all she could smell.

The brunette sighed heavily as she slumped herself on her made-up queen sized bed, staring at the ceiling.

She closed her eyes and memories started playing on her mind.

It was another Friday morning for Tiffany.

Another Friday without her.

 

 

 5 years ago

 

“Social Education.. Not here.. Not there..” Tiffany mumbled to herself as she searched through the wooden bookshelves in the public library nearby her house.

Yes, a library.

As much as she didn’t like reading books nor studying because she dedicated her life for music, she had to; in order to pass the upcoming final exam and to be able to enter the university of her dream. 

She carefully ran her fingers through some books while furrowing her eyebrows.

“It’s not here either,” she muttered disappointedly.

She walked to another side of the bookshelves and was going to look for a certain educational book when she spotted a petite girl tiptoed and reached her hand up to take a book.

She stood still there for a while, observing the shorter girl gritting her teeth and tiptoeing as high as she could, reaching her hand up. Somehow after seeing the latter’s milky white skin and short blonde hair, she felt familiar.

It wasn’t really Tiffany’s thing to help stranger, but weirdly she felt the urge to give a hand to the girl -whom she found kinda cute- in front of her.

She silently stepped beside the girl and reached her hand out. With one swift move, she held the green covered book; which she assumed was the one the latter tried to take.

The short girl stopped tiptoeing and slowly turned her head to Tiffany, her eyes were filled with disappointment. Her face was dropped as she bit her lower lip, staring at Tiffany with her round puppy eyes.

Sensing the girl was misunderstanding that she would snatch away the book she wanted, Tiffany quickly handed the book.

“Here you go,” she smiled, flashing her eyesmile.

Knowing Tiffany had a good intention, the shorter girl in jeans and white hoodie smiled brightly.

“Thank you,” she beamed as she accepted the book from Tiffany. “Tippani-ssi.”

Tiffany –strangely- felt a bit fluttered when the stranger mentioned her name, she couldn’t help but furrow her eyebrows before staring at the latter suspiciously. She checked her own shirt; there was no name tag on it, or anything that would  show her identity.

“How do you know my name?”

The latter looked stunned for a second before chuckling.

“Who wouldn’t know the name of the famous queenka at school?” she said with a hint of sarcastic.

“So you’re my schoolmate?”

“Yes.” she answered shortly with an unreadable expression.

Feeling the girl was offended by her blunt question, Tiffany immediately apologised.

“I’m sorry, it’s just.. There are many students at the school,” she smiled sheepishly.

She sighed in relief when the latter smiled understandingly as she shook her head lightly. “It’s okay, Tippani-ssi. I understand.” The girl once again beamed her warm smile that melted Tiffany’s heart.

Tiffany couldn’t help but become curious about her ‘newly-found’ schoolmate. “So what’s your name?” she asked.

“Taeyeon,” the girl grinned, showing her perfect white teeth as she reached her hand out. “Kim Taeyeon.”

Tiffany happily shook her hand. “Nice to know you, Taeyeon-ssi.”

“Nice to know you too. And just drop the formality, please call me Taeyeon, Tippani-ssi.”

“Okay, I will. So you have to do the same, Taeyeon-ah.” she said as she reluctantly let go of Taeyeon’s smooth hand. “Just call me Tiffany.”

“Alright, Tippani.” Taeyeon nodded like a little kid. “Sorry, it’s hard to pronounce your name.”

Tiffany just giggled at her silly excuse. Deep inside she liked the way Taeyeon said her name.

“It’s fine, Taeyeon-ah,” she said as she patted her shoulder.

Just then the two heard a cough from behind. They turned and saw the librarian ahjumma was standing in front of them, fixing her glasses’ position. “Please stay quiet, missy. This is a library, not a soccer stadium.”

“Sorry.” They said in unison before the grumpy ahjumma went back to her desk nearby the glass door.

“I never like her,” Tiffany whispered.

“Me neither,” Taeyeon chuckled as she whispered too. “Now shall we read our books?”

“Oh yes, I totally forget about the books. Let’s go.”

Then they sat facing each other on the chairs nearby and put their books on the table.

There was a silent for some moments.

Both were lost in their own book before Tiffany –who wasn’t very fond of reading- took a peek of Taeyeon. She observed how Taeyeon would raise an eyebrow when she found something she didn’t understand, how she would puff her cheeks when she tried to solve the problems, and how she would grin ear to ear when she finally found a way to solve out them.

Tiffany was caught off-guarded when suddenly Taeyeon looked up and met her eyes.

As much as she knew that it would make the latter suspicious, Tiffany just couldn’t stop staring at Taeyeon’s captivating onyx orbs.

“Is there something on my face?” Taeyeon asked confusedly.

“Oh no,” Tiffany waved her hands. “it’s just.. Your change of expression is so interesting, Taeyeon-ah.” she giggled.

 “Ah, I was too engrossed I think,” she rubbed the back of her neck shyly. “I can’t help it, biology is just too fun.”

“Fun? It’s freakin’ hard,” Tiffany said in disagreement. “Well, basically most of the subjects are hard for me,” she mumbled. “I’m stupid.”

“Hey, don’t say that,” Taeyeon smiled. “You’re really talented in music. I love hearing you sing on music class.”

“Really?” Tiffany’s frown slowly turned into a wide smile as her eyes twinkling.

“Really. Especially when you sing ballad songs. It feels like you sing it from the bottom of your heart.” Taeyeon complimented sincerely. “I really love it.”

That only made Tiffany’s face brighter.

“Thank you.” she said as she flashed her eyesmile, the latter smiled back.

“Don’t mention it. By the way which subject is hard for you?” Taeyeon asked as she flipped the page of her book.

“Huh? Why?” Tiffany tilted her head to the side.

“Well..” Taeyeon  played with her fingers nervously. “Maybe I can help you?” she anxiously asked the queenka.

“Ah,” Tiffany felt Taeyeon really made her day. “I’d love to. Thanks before, Taeyeon-ah.”

Taeyeon on the other side, was grinning happily like she had just hit the jackpot. “Great!” she exclaimed excitedly.

“I SAID PLEASE STAY QUIET, LADIES!” the ahjumma shouted in anger tone, obviously.

“Sorry.” Again, the two girls said in unison.They faced each other and giggled.

“Let’s be good friends,Taeyeon-ah.”

 

 

Tiffany smiled, remembering Taeyeon’s sweet smile when she asked her to be her friend.

But soon her smile turned into a hurt one.

She once again sighed as she stared at the wallpaper of her cell phone.

It was herself with Taeyeon, smiling brightly with Taeyeon’s arm around her shoulder and they made a heart shape with their hand.

 She could feel tears stung her eyes and she already got choked.

She slowly ran her index finger, touching the picture of Taeyeon.

 

One mistake, got a one regret

“No one’s perfect”

Even if I tried saying that,

whatever I do,

the wounds can’t heal

 

“Taeyeon-ah..” she faintly whispered in shaky voice.  “I miss you..”

 

 

 

 

3 years ago

 

 

Taeyeon and Tiffany had been inseparable best friends since they first met at the library 2 years ago.

Tiffany always had this funny feelings in her stomach everytime Taeyeon complimented her and smiled to her. She always wondered why she felt tingles everytime they touched.

And lately she had just realized that she fell for her. For Taeyeon.

She never said it. Or never had the courage to say it, to be exact. She was scared that her feelings would break their friendship. And the worst that Taeyeon would end up leaving her.

Little did she know, Taeyeon felt the same. The difference was, Taeyeon had already fallen for her ever since she heard Tiffany sang. Love at the first sight, or love at the first heard you could say.

That day, the two were having a little refreshing at the beach. They took strolls as the sun slowly set. The sky was bright orange and the wave danced calmly. There were only Taeyeon and Tiffany there.

Feeling that it was the right moment to confess her feelings, Taeyeon decided to do it.

“Pani-ah,” she called softly to the girl beside her who was splashing the water with the tip of her feet.

“Hmm?” Tiffany responded  as she smilingly turned to the latter.

“I..” Taeyeon paused. She was contemplating whether she better confess or not, considering the possibility of Tiffany’s reaction. She wanted, really wanted to be with Tiffany, but on the other hand she was afraid that Tiffany would reject her and leave her.

“You what, Tae?” Tiffany stared directly at her eyes, which weakened her heart. She couldn’t imagine what would she do if she didn’t have Tiffany by her side. It was too risky, she thought.

“I..” she sighed. “Never mind.”

“Yah, come on tell me. You know I am a curious person.” Tiffany pouted.

“Just forget it..” Taeyeon mumbled as she avoided Tiffany’s gaze and irresistable cute  pout.

“Alright, whatever you say.” Tiffany ran to the sea and started playing with the wave.

“Hajima, Pani-ah. It’s getting dark now. Come back here,” Taeyeon shouted worriedly from the sand.

“I don’t want to!” she stuck her tongue out from the water. “Tell me first.”

“Aish..” Taeyeon ruffled her blonde hair frustratedly.

“Tell me or I will just go to the middle, TaeTae-ah!” Tiffany threatened.

“No, no, don’t do it! It’s dangerous!” Taeyeon waved her hands defensively.

“Oh yeah I will.” Tiffany took some steps back, going further to the sea when the waves started to grow bigger as the sun almost perfectly set.

“Yah, come back here, Pani-ah! Okay, I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you. I LIKE YOU TIPPANI! WOULD YOU BE MY GIRLFRIEND?!” she shouted at the top of her lungs.

Tiffany froze at the moment. Her brain was still trying to completely understand the words she had just heard. Never in her dream she thought Taeyeon would feel the same as her.

“Taeyeon-ah..”

“Watch out, Tippani!”

Just then a big wave came and hit Tiffany from behind.

She was really shocked and could do nothing, being drifted by the wave. She could taste the salty water mixed with sand entered , her eyes and nose were extremely hurt. She could feel her lungs were started to be filled by the ocean water. She reached her hands out, desperately looking for a help.

With no second thought Taeyeon jumped to the water and swam as fast as she could, fighting over the waves. She quickly pulled Tiffany’s hand and grabbed her waist, securing her in her arms before immediately headed back to the sand. She carefully laid the latter on the sand.

“Tippani! “ she called, “Wake up, Tippani!” she tapped her cheeks several times, but the latter remained still with closed eyes. She called her repeatedly and shook her body but still got no response.

Tiffany didn’t breathe.

Taeyeon started to panic, the image of the worst thing that could happen played on her mind. Her heart was beating rapidly as she started crying. The only thing that was on her mind was, how to save Tiffany. With that she bent down, her face was now just inches away from Tiffany’s.

She stopped for awhile as she stared at the goddess-like girl face. Her heart raced even faster. Her eyes were slowly trailed down to the latter’s kissable lips.

“Okay, even though I’ve been hardly stopping myself from kissing her, I’m not taking advantage of her. I’m just trying to save her. ” she thought. “Assa! Kim Taeyeon, you can do this.”

With one last deep breath she put her lips on hers and did the CPR. At that moment she never knew that a CPR could be so sweet and full with electrifying tingles.

She pulled away and Tiffany started coughing, releasing some water inside her lungs. But she still didn’t breathe steadily.

“Please wake up, Tippani!”

Taeyeon bent down and once again their lips met. She was surprised when her lips got a response. She could see Tiffany was smilingly kissing her back, with her eyes remained shut and her arms wrapped Taeyeon’s neck.

Tiffany broke the kiss, leaving Taeyeon dumbfoundedly.

“I like you too, TaeTae,” she smiled lovingly. “I’d really love to be your girlfriend.”

Taeyeon instantly broke into a wide grin. “Saranghae, Tippani.” she whispered sincerely as she leaned forward, targetting for nothing but Tiffany’s pink lips.

Soon as their lips met they could feel fireworks ignited and the butterflies went wild; an indescribable feelings that they never knew it was existed in the world until that time.Their eyes were shut as their lips moved in synch, savoring the bliss moment as the sun finally set.

“Na do saranghae, Taeyeon-ah.”

 

 

 

The time I’m passing by alone is too slow

This mistake’s punishment is too heavy

The words you last left

Up to now is replaying continuously

My heart still hurts

 

 

The sweet, soothing voice of Taeyeon was still fresh on Tiffany’s mind.

Her scent. Her warm embrace. Her smile. Her love.

Tiffany couldn’t get enough of them. Through every up and down Taeyeon would always be by her side. She was the reason why Tiffany felt like she was the luckiest girl in the world. She loved everything about Taeyeon.

But if she were to say her favorite thing of her, she would say that she always loved it everytime Taeyeon pulled her into an embrace and her hair softly when she cried.

It just felt so safe and right. She felt like she could do anything with Taeyeon. To face the cruel world.

Taeyeon always successfully calmed her down with just a few words, and she always ended it with one tender kiss on her forehead, softly saying “It’s okay, I’m with you.”

That was all Tiffany needed.

 

But now shewasn’t there anymore to hug her.

 

Tiffany weakly got on her feet, dragged herself to her cupboard and took out her pastel pink hoodie.

She closed the cupboard and headed out of her bedroom.

She stopped her step when she was passing the cozy living room, there was an LCD TV along with home theatre set, and a big pink totoro doll was sitting innocently on the soft white couch in front of the TV.

For the certain times of the day, she sighed heavily.

She hugged the totoro doll and finally let her tears poured freely as she buried her face on it.

“.. It would never be the same without you..”

 

 

Just one mistake,

Just one regret

It’s selfish but it’s because I love you

 

 

 

1 year ago

 

 

 Tiffany was sitting on her couch lazily with her phone on her palm.

She stood up and walked back and forth before finally slumping back to the couch.

Her face wasn’t really delighted.

“Why doesn’t she call?” she mumbled.

She sighed as she unlocked her phone and stared at it. No calls. No texts. Well maybe some, but not from the certain danshin she’d been waiting.

“Does she forget?” she asked to no one in particular. She just couldn’t stop wondering.

Then suddenly her apartment door bell rang. She unwillingly left the comfortable couch and ran some fingers through her messy brunette hair before walking to the door.

She tiptoed to peek through the small glass of the door, revealing her guest.

Once she recognised her visitor, her face immediately lit up and she excitedly opened the door.

“Taeyeon-ah! Come in!” she exclaimed cheerfully as she let Taeyeon stepped in before closing the door behind them.

“Pani-ah,” Taeyeon smiled brightly. “Happy second anniversary.” she said before pecking her cheek.    

“I thought you forgot,” Tiffany said while pouting.

“Well I’m sorry for not calling nor texting you. My phone’s on service.” she chuckled as she pulled out the fluffy thing that she had been hiding behind her back. “Now say hi to Totoro.”

“Kyaah! Pink Totoro!!” Tiffany squealed happily as she hugged the doll tightly.

“I’m glad that you like it,” Taeyeon said as she sat on the couch. “But Taetoro want a hug from Tippani too.” she pouted as she spread her arms childishly.

“Aigoo, come here my TaeTae,” Tiffany giggled as she put down the doll and joined Taeyeon to sit before wrapping her arms around her. The latter gladly hugged back. ”Thank you.” she said.

“Anything for my Pani.” Taeyeon smiled sincerely as they slowly broke the hug, but still didn’t let go of each other as Taeyeon held Tiffany’s hand.

“Will you have a sleepover here tonight?”

“I didn’t plan to..”

 “Come on, I got this bunch of new DVDs. Let’s have a movie marathon like usual.” Tiffany whined.

“Well..” Taeyeon hesitated for a while.

“Pweeease?” Tiffany beamed her puppy eyes and pout as she brought Taeyeon’s hands up and kissed them several times.

“Now how am I supposed to resist that?” Taeyeon chuckled as she shook her head, watching her adorable girlfriend’s cute action.

“You know I’m irresistable,” Tiffany flashed her eyesmile proudly, “Sleepover it is then!”

“Alright, alright.” Taeyeon playfully ruffled Tiffany’s hair. “Just don’t attack me while I sleep.”

“Excuse me?” Tiffany raised an eyebrow at the latter’s sentence. “The last time I checked you were the one who touched my .” she stuck her tongue out.

“You know you like it.” Taeyeon laughed her ahjumma laugh. “Who told you to have such a y —Mmfff” Taeyeon’s face was buried on a pillow that Tiffany pushed to her face.

“ert.”

Taeyeon pried the pillow off her face, giving Tiffany her naughty grin. “I love you.” she caressed her cheeks and brought her face closer to hers.

Their nose already touched and Tiffany could feel Taeyeon’s warm breath. “Still a ert.” she mumbled before slowly shutting her eyes.

“And I still love you.” With that she gave her one sweet kiss.

 

 

If I can jump through time and space

And be able to meet you

Say, even if we come to the same conclusion

There wouldn’t be any regrets for sure

 

 

Tiffany loosened her hug on the doll when her tears were close to dry.

Her eyes and nose were now completely red.

She wiped her tears with the back of her hand before taking a deep breath and heading to the door.

She turned the lights off and exited her apartment room, locking the door.

She went down by lift.

Tiffany was now walking on the street, wearing her pastel pink hoodie and skinny jeans. She stopped when she passed a flower shop.

“Excuse me ahjumma, I would like to buy these.” she said to the florist as she pointed some white flowers.

 After paying them, she smelled the scent of the flowers.

“I hope she will like it.”

 

 

 

 

3 days ago

 

 

The city lights of Seoul were sparkling.

Cars passing every here and there as usual.

There were no stars could be seen as the rain started to pour little by little.

“I can’t believe you’re cheating on me, Kim Taeyeon.”

“For God’s sake, Tippani. I’m not cheating on you!” Taeyeon frustratedly said to the crossing arms Tiffany.

“Then why did you kiss that girl?” Tiffany raised her voice.

“I didn’t kiss her!” she held Tiffany’s hand but Tiffany quickly pried her hands. “Come on Pani-ah, let me explain it. This is supposed to be a romantic dinner, not a silly quarrel.”

“Explain what?” she yelled as she started crying. “You’ve been ignoring my texts and calls for weeks, Kim Taeyeon! Everytime I came to your house it was always empty. Where were you? Where were you, Taeyeon-ah!?” 

Taeyeon took a step back, a little startled by Tiffany’s outburst.

“I..” Taeyeon bit her lip nervously. “I was..”

“See? And just now I saw right in front of my eyes you kissed that Sunmi girl!” Tiffany scoffed with tears rolled down her eyes.

“I didn’t kiss her! She kissed me first, and it was only a friendly kiss on cheek, Pani-ah.”

“That didn’t change the fact that you are with another girl, Kim Taeyeon.”

“Tippani--”

“You know what, Tae? I’m tired. You’ve been avoiding me and now when I thought you’d make it up for me, what did I find? I found you with another girl.” Taeyeon opened and was about to speak when Tiffany put her hands in front of her, blocking her face.

“Don’t give me excuses. You’re too much, I don’t want to be hurt anymore.”

“Listen to me—“

“Thanks for everything.” with that Tiffany immediately ran, leaving Taeyeon behind.

 She bumped to people as she ran, Taeyeon behind kept calling her name repeatedly, trying her best to catch up with Tiffany with her not-so-good running ability, totally ignoring the stare of passing people on that crowded street of Seoul.

Tiffany could feel her gaze was hardly blur as she cried harder. Her hand covering . Without looking at her surroundings, she stepped to cross the busy road.

“Tippani!”

Tiffany quickened her step, shoving the waiting people in lines.

Just when she thought she was about to reach the other end of the road, she heard a loud honk.  She surprisedly turned her head and saw the bright light flashed on her, just a second before something hit her really hard and everything went dark as her body felt numb and hurt.

 

“What was that..” she winced in pain as she slowly opened her eyes. She realized she was laying on the edge of the road, with bleeding elbow and knee.

She could hear the noise of people murmured and some screamed.

 

“Oh my God!”

“What’s happening?”

“Call the ambulance!”

 

 

Tiffany painedly got up from the ground.

She turned her head to the source of the noise. People were surrounding  a certain spot, staring down with pity.

 

“She’s bleeding really bad!”

 

She hardly dragged herself to the crowd with one wounded leg,ignoring her bleeding wounds got pierced by the hard rain. Her right hand holding her left bleeding elbow.

Her heart started beating faster and tightened in every step she took. She knew what had just happened; but denied it.

“No..” she mumbled.

“Somebody call the ambulance now, this girl was hit by a car!”

“No..”

 

As Tiffany tried to pass the noisy crowd, she could see a figure was laying on the ground, but she didn’t get to see the figure’s face.

Somehow deep inside, after she saw the figure’s milky white skin, she knew.

 She knew who it was.

 

Tiffany finally got through the people, and was now standing right in front of the pale, badly wounded petite girl, laying on the ground, as the rain showered her mercilessly.

“No..” she sobbed. “Taeyeon-ah..”

Her knee gave away as she stared at the bleeding Taeyeon.

“Please wake up..” she held Taeyeon’s hand, brought it to her face and kissed it.

“Tip.. Pani?” Taeyeon slowly opened her eyes.

“Taeyeon-ah!” Tiffany cried.

Taeyeon weakly smiled. “I’m.. Sorry, Pani-ah.”

 “No, I’m sorry, Taeyeon-ah.”

“Sorry if I was avoiding you these past weeks..”

Tiffany shook her head. “Save your sorry for later, we have to get you to the hospital first.”

“Maybe there’s no later..” she bitterly smiled.

“Don’t say that..” Tiffany sniffed.

“Please take something from my right pocket, Tiffany. If it hasn’t been crushed like my bones.”

Tiffany did as she told and she found a little box on Taeyeon’s pocket.

“Open it.”

She opened it and found a beautiful shiny ring inside; although it was a little broken from the crush.

“I was working to get that these past weeks..”

 

 “Don’t cry, Pani-ah..” she smiled softly as she weakly raised her hand to caress Tiffany’s cheek.

 

Tiffany felt heart tightened even more as uneasy feelings appeared. Her tears couldn’t stop flowing.

“I’m sorry, Taeyeon-ah..”

Taeyeon smiled before holding her hand and gave a weak kiss on it.

“Tippani..”

 

“I’m sorry..”

 

“.. I love you.”

 

Taeyeon’s hand released the hold as she shut her eyes, smiling.

 

Tiffany felt her heart stopped beating as the ring on her palm fell.

She could hear nothing but the rain, and the clink sound of the ring, hitting the ground.

 

 

“Taeyeon-ah..”

 

 

 

 

Tiffany opened her umbrella, letting it got hit by the rain that suddenly poured, as she stood in front of a ground with fresh flowers on it.

She was alone in that quiet place. Where soul couldn’t speak anymore and smile never accompanied anyone who entered it.

“Taeyeon-ah,”

 

 

 I’m going to embark on a time machine

If I would be able to go meet you again

I wouldn’t ask for more

 

She put down the flowers as she let her tears to pour freely, crying her heart out.

“I’m sorry..”

 

"I'd wish I can go back and say it once more.."

   

Before it becomes a distant fleeting memory,

Before our memories are forgotten,

 

“.. That I love you.”

 

Gimme a time machine.

 

 

 

 

 

---

AAAH!

I couldn't believe I've just written an angst. 0.0

It's my first time, so sorry if it's kinda lame. :)

BUT their Time Machine PV is just giving me bunch of inspirations.. So yeah. :3

Btw I'll update my second ongoing fic "Master of Heart" as soon as I can.

You know that AFF was error a while ago right? I lost it, so I have to re write it again.

 

Anyway, please leave comment and subscribe~ I really love it. ^^

Spread the love~~ <3