25: Run

   “Kyungsoo?” said Jeongri. 

   “Yeah?”

   “What do you think about when you’re alone?”

   Kyungsoo looked a little surprised at her sudden question, “Why do you ask?”

   “I was just wondering…”

   There was a palpable tension in the air tonight. Kyungsoo and Jeongri had finished at the clinic early, and the sun was setting, leaving a warm glow across the district of Hallowmire. Multicoloured leaves lined the pavement in a beautiful arrangement of vivid colours. All around them, couples walked by, hand in hand in their own little worlds. Jeongri wrapped her fingers a little tighter between Kyungsoo’s, feeling comforted by his familiar touch. She was unable to stop the smile that kept creeping into her expression.

   Even though she pretended she didn’t like them, Jeongri always adored love stories, especially the parts where the two main characters fall in love with each other without realising their feelings. Kyungsoo had been nothing but the perfect gentleman, in what was turning out to be a perfect day. With his neat hair, serene expression and long manly winter’s coat; if she had to write one of those stories, Kyungsoo would be her male lead.

   He tilted his head and let his gaze settle in the distance, “I think about the past.”

   “What about the past?” Jeongri asked.

   “Things like working with my grandfather, and living in Merehua, hanging out with friends or going to my favourite places.”

   “Where did you use to go?”

    In the entire time Jeongri had been living with Kyungsoo, she’d never seen him go anywhere besides work, the market or home. He just didn’t seem like the type of person who enjoyed going out. A rare nostalgic expression formed on his face, a look of bittersweet happiness that she hadn’t seen before.

   “There was a bar I use to frequent,” he said, “They had open mic nights on Tuesdays and Thursdays.”

   Jeongri’s felt drop open, “Did you sing?”

   A mixture of nostalgia and curiosity stirred in her mind as past memories fleeted briefly across her thoughts. She also liked to sing once, but that was a long time ago.

   “Sometimes,” Kyungsoo laughed nervously, the top of his ears tinged pink with embarrassment, “But I’m not very good.”

   “Lies. I’ll be the judge of that,” Jeongri said, looking at him expectantly.

   Startled, Kyungsoo shook his head, “No, I can’t. I haven’t sung in a while.”

   “Oh, come on,” she exclaimed, a glint of excitement in her eyes, “Just a little bit for me.”

  Even though he was grinning, he looked so reluctant, but she didn’t care. The monotone image of Kyungsoo she had in her mind was suddenly splashed with a melody of colours. His voice was one of the first things she liked about him, so all she wanted was to hear him sing.

   Kyungsoo stopped and placed his hand on the side of her hair, brushing it softly over her shoulder.

   “Not today,” he said, “Let me prepare something, can you wait? I want to do it right.”

   “Okay,” she replied quietly, biting her lip before following him once more.

   Inside, Jeongri’s feelings squirmed around, causing butterflies in her stomach. They had promised each other that they wouldn’t start something as complicated as a relationship, but it was moments like this that screwed with her mind. Jeongri wasn’t one to break promises, but almost every moment with Kyungsoo made her feel like she was one of those characters in the love stories she pretended she hated.

   “What else do you think about?” she asked, curious to find out more.

   Kyungsoo thought for a moment, “You.”

   “Me?” Jeongri said, surprised by the boldness of his answer, “Why me?”

   “Why not you?” he asked with a shy smirk, “You’re my assistant now. I couldn’t work at the clinic without you.”

   A small sense of disappointment bloomed from his answer. Jeongri could feel herself pouting a little.

   “I see.”

   “Why?” Kyungsoo asked, stopping again.

   He pulled on her hands so that she latched onto his shoulders, fearing she would fall into him. Jeongri blinked a few times. She was so close to him now, their chests touching, his lips were so close to hers.

   “Were you expecting another answer?” Kyungsoo mused, eyebrows raised expectantly.

   Flustered, Jeongri shook her head, refusing to meet his gaze as her cheeks warmed up.

   “No, don’t be silly.”

   Kyungsoo looked at her with a knowing smile, and he wrapped his hands around her waist, resting them in the small of her back.

   “Jeongri,” he said, his deep voice sounding so soft in the autumn air.

   She couldn’t look at him, she was sure he could feel her heart beating at a hundred miles per hour.

   “Yeah?” she mumbled.

   “I think about you when I’m alone because it feels strange to be without you now,” he said softly before leaning in.

   Jeongri took a sharp intake of breath before he kissed her, his lips so soft on her. This was the first time they had kissed somewhere other than under the sheets in the moonlight. All of a sudden she was aware how in public they were but she couldn’t pull away. After what seemed like an eternity, he pulled away first. It hadn’t been a passionate kiss, it had been one filled with adoration, he never forced her to do what she didn’t want to.

   “Kyungsoo, what are we doing?” Jeongri asked quietly, “It’s not meant to be like this.”

   But Kyungsoo only smiled at her, the way he always did that confused her so.

   “I’m not doing anything.”

   “But then why does this feel like it should be something more?”

   “Should it?” he asked poignantly.

   Despite the yearning in her heart, Jeongri found herself pulling away from him unable to give him the answer he wanted. There was a fear in her heart that had been growing steadily ever since she met Kyungsoo. With her past, it was only inevitable that it would catch up with her, and the more time she spent with him, the more she found herself worrying for his safety, pushing him away against her heart’s desires.

   “I don’t know,” she whispered.

   There was a resignation in Kyungsoo’s eyes, but the spark behind them never faded.

   “I know we promised to never complicate things with a relationship,” he began, “But I want you to know, if you ever change your mind then....” his voice trailed off, but Jeongri didn’t need him to finish. She knew what he wanted to say.

   Again, he leaned in and placed another soft kiss on her lips. Jeongri felt herself melting into Kyungsoo’s touch. She could feel herself dancing on the fine line between falling in love, and not wanting to hurt someone who had become so important to her. With each pirouette, she teetered along, scared to fall on either side, instead choosing to stay on the fine line because she wanted to live in the present.

   “Okay,” she said, finally looking at him.

   “Un