The ending notes of Getting Closer faded away as 13 young men fell to the ground in synchronized exhaustion. It was 11 pm and they had done exactly 22 run-throughs of the song. Seokmin struggled to catch his breath, resting his head on Jeonghan’s thigh. The only sounds in the room were loud panting and the dance teacher’s clapping.

“Well done, boys! We’ll stop here. Go home, eat and rest.” The boys cheered and dragged themselves to their feet, energized by the sound of food and sleep. They thanked their teacher, gathered their bags, and tumbled out of the practice room. 

Seokmin rushed ahead, latching onto Seungcheol’s arm. He was still a little uncomfortable around Wonwoo, and he felt a bit uneasy around Soonyoung. He told himself that it was because he couldn’t sort himself out. He couldn’t accept that it was because of guilt from lying to the older.

He had promised to confide in Soonyoung, but he had no intention on keeping his promise.

And he hated himself for that.

Seungcheol smiled down at Seokmin, patting his head before continuing his debate with Joshua. The younger sighed and rested his head on his leader’s shoulder, letting his eyes close.

***

When Seokmin opened his eyes next, Chan was poking his cheek and they were outside their apartment building. Seokmin shook his head, muttering “I’m up, I’m up” as he unbuckled his seatbelt and dragged his tired body out of the van. As he stumbled to the elevator, a presence next to him made him look up. His heart sank when he realized it was Soonyoung.

A sad-looking Soonyoung.

(A look that stung more than Seokmin would like to admit.)

The ravenette walked next to him, but unlike normal, he kept his hands to himself. “Seokmin, you’re avoiding me. Why?”

Seokmin waved his hands and shook his head. “No, no, hyung! I’m not avoiding you, I promise.”

A hurt look swept across Soonyoung’s round face and Seokmin sighed internally. He knows I’m lying to him.

“Every time I walk in a room, you walk out. Whenever I sit near you, you move away. You never cuddle or play with me anymore.” Soonyoung’s eyes were sorrowful as he continued in a small voice. “Did I do something wrong?”

Seokmin’s eyes widened. No, not at all. It’s all my fault. He shook his head again. “No way, hyung. I’m sorry for making you feel that way.”

“Can you tell me why, then?”

Seokmin took a deep breath. He can't know. “I-I can’t.” A shadow passed over Soonyoung’s sweet eyes. Conceal, don’t feel. The boy, his best friend, suddenly was unreadable.

Soonyoung pressed his lips together, eyes already shining with tears. Seokmin reached out to cup his face, but the older leaned away.

With a sniffle, Soonyoung turned and hurried after Jun, small hands desperate for his comfort. As Joshua and Jeonghan walked past him, they sent him sympathetic, but disappointed looks.

Seokmin was left standing in the lobby, guilt heavy in his chest as his heart lay in shattered pieces.