"This is just in. The rumors that Kai from EXO and Sulli from f(x) are dating was confirmed by their agency. It looks like they've been a couple for quite a time. Pictures from their recent date will come after this. The speculations-"

 

Taemin shut the television off, completely frustrated with what he just saw. The daily gossip show was reporting on Sulli's newly revealed relationship with Kai. It frustrates him a lot that the truth could never be revealed to the public. He is already tired with all the hidden conversations, the secret glances and all the secret meetings.

This is not right.

It is not Kai who is dating Sulli but him. He wishes to be able to go with Sulli in public like some of his other idol friends. If it wasn't for the company's orders, he would have all that he wanted by now. Strolling by the Han river. Walking hand-in-hand in public with no one to bother them. Wearing their couple rings freely without any feeling of anxiety.

He sighed.

Why did Lee Soo Man decide that Kai of all people would be the perfect person to have a scandal with her?

 Of all people, why must it be his best friend? 

Just because their career is now soaring through the roof, he couldn't be with Sulli?

Just because his boss doesn't want the same thing that happened to Jonghyun and Sekyung to happen again to the two of them?

Why?

Why?

Why?

 

He knew from the start that it would never be easy to date a celebrity and one in his own company at that. But he went through and it wasn't something he regretted doing. Even though both of them are very busy with their group activities, they would always find time to be with each other. There was even a time they almost decided to break up because there was no time to meet each other. Fortunately, they realized that time spent with each other, no matter how short, was better than being apart with each other.

He never did care about what people would say about them. His group, her group, and the rest of S.M artists knew about their relationship and they didn't seem to care about them. But apparently, the rest of the world does. It seems they rather their idols stay single for the rest of their life rather than build a family and live happily just so they can satisfy the fan's sick mind games.

Lee Soo Man was right.

He had no choice but to do this. To agree for a fake public relationship of Kai and Sulli just so they could still be together. He would just have to do this for the sake of them and the company.

 

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

The first time Taemin met Sulli was the first time he entered the company. It was during introduction day for the new trainees when he first laid his eyes on her. He felt nothing at the time and he doubted she did too. Sulli was the one who greeted him first and their friendship just build on from that.

 

Without anyone knowing, I love you

Without anyone knowing, I think of you

 

All day, I remember you

All day, I love you

 

Slowly, their relationship grows into something more. Before they both knew it, their relationship became more than just platonic. Love grew slowly in the hearts of these two idols, planting itself without warning and sowing it when they least expected it. He found that he was always thinking of her welfares. Her face keeps visiting him at the time he least expected it.

 It came to a point where he couldn't take it anymore and he risked it all to confess his love to Sulli. His confession was simple and was done secretly. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary but something both of them will remember for a lifetime. Euphoria would be the only word to describe his feeling when Sulli accepted him. And so the two began their relationship full of obstruction.

 

In case anyone recognizes us, we can't walk comfortably in the streets of Kangnam

Only the neon signs and streetlights in the dark night

Are blessing our relationship, making my heart ache

In front of many people, I can't express my greetings or a single word to you, making me anxious

We're trapped in a box called reason, rather than a box called emotion

 

 

Their first outing as a couple was enjoyable though done in secret. With the help from Jonghyun who has somewhat an expert in ids dating in secret -perhaps because he has done this himself a long time ago- they went on the date along the street of a secluded neighborhood in the dead of the night. 

The street was dead silent with everyone already tucked in their beds but not for these two idols. Hand in hand, they strolled, talking about things they would do if ever they were never idols dating each other. He kept his cool facade when their skin touched when inside his heart was feeling like it would burst.

 

This feeling like I'm walking on ice

This feeling like I'm flying in the sky

Whether this is electrifying or just pathetic

I can't tell which one is right

 

 

It was the most wonderful feeling he had ever felt in all his 18 years in this world. He is now 22 and the feeling is still there whenever he looks into her eyes or just seeing her face. It felt like all the fatigue accumulated from that day would just go away only by the sight of her beautiful smile. She was truly special in his heart. 

 

 

 

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

 

Oppa, I miss you so much! Are you upset about the news? You know it's not true right? I still only have you.

 

~Sulli~

 

Taemin smiled seeing the text sent by Sulli. It has only been a few minutes since the news was broadcasted when he received the message. Right now, f(x) is in Japan, promoting their new single to the public. His heart flutters learning that Sulli would take the time off of her busy schedule to comfort him. 

 

It's okay Ssul~! I'm fine, really. Of course I know the news is not true. I miss you too. So much.

 

~Taemin~

 

 

It's hard to talk on the phone with you so every day

We secretly talk through texting as I cautiously look around me

Instead of saying I love you, saying I miss you

Is more familiar in our conversation so my heart aches

 

 

There was no one in the room so he didn't bother checking for people. However, if he was anywhere else than the S.M building and his dorm, this would be a routine for him. Communicating through devices were never to his liking. He rather see his beloved in person, even if she was having a really bad hair day, than talking through a medium where you can only hear the voice rather than the whole package.

His heart longs for her right now. But she was so far away. He longs for her tender words, her loving caresses and her soothing smile. He wants her to tell him that everything will be okay.  That no matter what happens, they will still be together. 

When the company first found out that they were in a relationship, they were already 3 months into it. But the company decided to ignore it since there were never any outrageous rumor outbreak. The first two years, they played it smart. Keeping with the secret late night dates, talking to each other only through messaging and texting. It was tiring really, to have a love so big to another but having to keep it secret from the entire world.

 

Every day, I am love sick over you

Everywhere I look, I see you - so do you know how much more I miss you?

Even if you're next to me, because of your pushed down hat

I can't even look at your eyes - who will know this feeling?

 

But then frustration slowly crept up to him when he realized that he can't even look into her eyes when they're not alone. Even when she sat next to him, they would have to pretend that the other wasn't there. It came to a point that he wants to risk it all and just come out with the relationship. Luckily, there was Jonghyun who stopped him before he does something stupid.

"Are you crazy? Do you really want to risk everything? I know you're tired, but please just go on with the secret. You're happy with her, I know. I see that every time she is in your presence. But i don't want the same thing that happened to me and Sekyung happens to you two. Think about her.. You're not the one who will be bashed by the fans. It is her! It will always be the girl. Later, there will be more pressure and then you two will have to end it all. I'm sorry, Taem. I know you're tired but confirming your relationship with her to the public will not help anybody. Time spent together with her is much more precious than not seeing her at all."

Such was Jonghyun's words that held him back from doing it.

And then came the news that S.M will debut a new boy group. Everybody was in quite a buzz. Teasers came out and the feedback was tremendously positive. He was happy because one of his best friend in the company would finally make his debut. He helped with all that he could to make sure his friend achieved his dreams like he did with his.

But when the actual music video came out, the response went plummeting down to the ground. The group was amazing but the competition at the time was strong with all the big name companies debuting new groups. The group's popularity began to sunk further into the sea of idols. Getting tired of the continuous failure, Lee Soo Man decided to pull of the 'dating card'.

You see, before they even debuted, there was already a rumor that Kai has been dating Sulli, though that is not true because at the time, he was just covering for Taemin during their date. Their relationship was well in the third year when Lee Soo Man decided for Sulli to be the 'lucky' girl who will be paired up with Kai.

The reason being that the f(x) girls career are now soaring through the roof after their Japan debut and is now preparing for a Korean comeback. So with a story like that, there would be no way for the public to bash Sulli. He was very reluctant when he heard the news. He loves Sulli too much to agree. But after a lot of talks from his friends and seeing for himself of his best friend's group situation, he finally agreed but with a condition that it will only be announced next year.

He sighed.

He got himself into this mess and he found no way out of it.

 

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

14th February.

 

Today is Valentine's Day. A holiday in Korea in which the girl has to give the chocolate to the guy she likes.

 

The sound of loud music blasts through his ears. He felt like disappearing from the place just to protect his eardrums. Taemin was in the backstage of the show Inkigayo. It is a Valentine's Day special and his group was invited to perform a special stage. Now, there is good things and bad things of his presence there.

The good thing being Sulli is here.

The bad thing being f(x) and EXO will have a special stage today.

The worst thing thing being Sulli will give Kai a box of chocolates while he would kneel down on one knee and gives her a rose.

He lets out a low grunt.

 

Wherever we go, we always sit in the farthest corner

Whatever we do, we can't even take a single picture

 

Her waiting room is just next to his and he was going crazy with the urge to just go and visit her. Surely it wouldn't be a suspicious thing for a senior to visit his junior, right? But the problem here is, they were given strict orders to stay out of the girls' waiting room, unless the girls came to their waiting room. Only the group EXO was allowed to go to their room. He was hoping so bad that Sulli would come to their waiting room and visit him. They haven't seen each other for a few weeks and he wants to see her beautiful face in person so bad. 

"F(x) and EXO, get ready! You're up next!" 

 

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

The show ended with all groups performing splendidly. The crowds were cheering so loud when Kai hugged Sulli after their little stint. All of the artists were gathering at the front stage as the emcees announced this week's winner. Sulli was sandwiched between Taemin and Kai and Kai's hand wrapped itself around her shoulders, all of them waving to the crowd present at the time. 

 

Even if we lock eyes for a moment, we get surprised

We get nervous and scared in case someone figures out our secret

 

Taemin tried his best to resist the urge to throw Kai's hands off of Sulli's shoulders badly. He glanced at Sulli, just wanting to take a look at the girl's expression but he met with Sulli's eyes instead. Instantly, like a person who just touched something hot, they took their eyes off of each other. Inside, he hoped nobody noticed his little act with Sulli. But still his heart flutters when he knew Sulli was stealing glances of him too.

 

"And the winner is… B.A.P!" 

The crowd roared with applause and cheers as all other artists left the stage, leaving behind the victorious singers to bask in their glory.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

 

 

The street was dead silent as night slowly approaches. The two lovers stroll down the street they always go to with their friends protecting them in case anybody sees them. He misses this. He almost forgot how soft Sulli's skin feels against his. How beautiful her smile was tonight. His heart flutters every time Sulli smiled at him.

 

"Oppa, I have missed you so much." Sulli wraps her arms around his and puts her head on his shoulders.

"I miss you too, Ssul."

 

They continue to stroll down the streets, avoiding people whenever they see one. It was silent yet peaceful. An atmosphere that was truly appreciated by the both of them. They haven't seen each other for such a long time and surely there would be a lot of things to tell. But somehow, looking into each other's eyes, they already know of what the other had gone through. However, Taemin was still curious about one thing.

 

"So, how are things with Kai?" The question earned him a chuckle from his girlfriend.

"What, oppa? Are you jealous now?"

"Well, of course one would be jealous if he sees his girl being hugged by another. Even though I know it's fake." The last part was barely inaudible but Sulli heard it all the same.

"Oppa, you don't have to worry, ok? Your name has been tattooed forever in my heart and it is going nowhere."

"You're always one with words, huh?" Taemin smiled sweetly and pecked her forehead.

"Then what's bothering you?" Sulli voiced out her concern. She knew the matter was not yet solved. He sighed.

"It's just… I wanted to be the one to receive the chocolate from you. Not him. I mean, I know he's my friend and all but.." He let his words trail. 

"I knew you feel that way. That's why I brought this with me." Sulli delved into her bag as the curious Taemin watches her actions.

Out of it, she holds a box of chocolate and handed it to Taemin with a dazzling smile on her face. Taemin smiled from ear to ear when he took it from her hands. Fortunately, they were passing by an empty park full of wild flowers. He picked one and gave it to Sulli and kissed her squarely on the lips. Sulli giggled.

"Well, that was one thing Kai didn't gave me."

 

What's so important about that? You are next to me

And our time together is more precious

 

This is the reason he has the strength to continue being an idol. Sulli. Without her, he would have quit years ago. Their relationship has gone through so much. But he didn't care. As long as they're together, it didn't matter to him. He would never sacrifice this relationship for anything.

For now, it may still be in the shadows. But one day, he is determined to let the world know that Sulli is his. One day, he would propose to her in front of the whole world. When they are joined together with an official bond, nobody can do anything anymore to Sulli. When that time comes, they won't be separated from each other. They won't have to keep their relationship in secret anymore. They could finally be together with ease, with no obstruction and build a happy family that would last a lifetime.

 

Still, I only love you

Still, I only think of you

It will never change forever, the love of you and I

I love you more than myself

I think of you more than myself

No one needs to know, if only I have you, I can live

 

He smiled to himself at the thought of that. Yes, he would love this girl for as long as they both shall live.

 

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

 

"Taemin! What's gotten into you?"

The 25 year-old watches as the maknae walks staggeringly to his room. He smells strongly of liquor and it wonders him on how he got home. Jonghyun was watching the late night shows on TV when the front door bursts open only to reveal a drunk Taemin with his phone on one hand and a bottle of vodka on the other. He barely made it to the couch when he passed out. Being the responsible hyung, Jonghyun quickly rushes to help .

"Hyung... I.. can't take this anymore.." Taemin pushes the words out through his mouth, barely conscious of his actions nor words anymore.

"What are you talking about, Taem?" Taemin said nothing but smiled, pointing to his phone. Just like that, he passed out for the second time. Now, for good.

Jonghyun sighed.

He gathered his strength and bring the 22 year-old to his room. He was still as light as always so there was no trouble in bringing him to his room. He did what he could for the maknae and set him down on his bed, putting away the liquor, hanging his jacket and setting his phone on the nightstand. He shook his head watching Taemin who is already sound asleep. 

Taemin never really likes to drink. This is a fact well-known to Jonghyun as well as the rest of the world. He only drinks if there's a problem so big that he couldn't  handle all by himself. And he guessed that this problem would be related to Sulli. By now, the rest of the world would already know that Kai and Sulli is the hottest topic being spoken by people all around the world so there's no doubt that Taemin already knew about the news.

Poor Taemin.

It wasn't enough that he has to date in secret. It's even worse that his girl is now taken by his best friend. He couldn't understand why did Lee Soo Man went as far as to use the dating card just to increase EXO's popularity while sacrificing Taemin's own health along the way. He probably wouldn't understand how important Sulli is to Taemin, not that anyone even bothered to tell him of their current situation. Taemin has been complaining thousands of times to him on how much he wanted to bring this out in public and his response would always be the same. To think about her. To think about the hardship they'll go through if they decided to announce it and it worked so far.

As far as he knows, Taemin went out with Sulli about 2 hours ago at their usual place. It was Onew's turn to watch them since he had less things on his plate compared to the other members. The date must have ended around an hour ago since Onew has his own curfew -being a 26 year-old man means fatigue catches up to him easily. So Taemin must have wandered off on his own because Onew came home approximately an hour ago. During that time to now, Jonghyun assumed that he spent his time drinking at some bar maybe, or maybe some stalls alpng the streets. Taemin is very unpredictable of what he can do when it comes to heartbreaks.

The phone!

Jonghyun distinctly remembers that Taemin pointed to his phone and smiled before passing out a while ago. He hurriedly went to the nightstand and grabbed Taemin's phone. 

The password is Sulli's birthday.

0329.

The sound of the phone unlocking was quite loud but it didn't wake anybody up. As soon as it was unlocked, it revealed the last application the user opened before the phone locked itself.

Twitter.

A famous site known by almost everyone in the modern world. Everyone has a Twitter account nowadays, even the SHINee members, though he was the first of them to venture into the tweeting business, followed by Key and the others. Taemin had just created his account in the last few weeks but his folowers are closing to the amount of his followers. Jonghyun scrolled to Taemin's profile, wanting to check of his last tweet. What he saw surprised him to no end.

 

I can't take this anymore. It has never been him! It's me! ME! Choi Sulli, will you marry me?

 

Jonghyun gasped, trying to make sense of the world he's currently in. 

Oh, Taemin. What have you gotten yourself into?

 

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Author's Notes:

If any of you haven't figure it out yet, this fic is inspired by the new group B.A.P's song Secret Love ft. Jieun of Secret. The words in Italic is the song.The song was so sweet yet so sad that I had to write a story about it. I wanted to make it kind of adult-ey and whatnot but I figured the lyrics are much suited for idol life so I made this! I also want to use this song for my fic Our Fairytale and it also has the same cast but of course a different yet not that different storyline from this.

Oh, and I am in no way hate EXO. I just made them a bit of failure here because I want to make the story. I'm sure they will be amazing after they debuted^^

This one-shot is also a gift to rockerchickz for being the first 100th subscriber for my fic The Librarian's Story. Hope you and all the others enjoy!! And pleasepleaseplease tell your friends about this collection because I'm dying for more subscribers!!

 

##-**I realized, I forgot one final piece for this story. This will leave you wondering what will happen next to the two idols. And I edited a couple of my mistakes since I was typing this in a hurry back then. Hope you enjoyed^^ Oh, and I just send this one-shot to a wonderful review shop and I am currently waiting for their review, so next chapter would probably be the review for this... unless I get another idea for a one-shot...