“No, not here,” he said to me smiling as he grabbed the white railing and swung himself over to the tree branch “I can’t tell you here”. He extended his hand to me “Are you coming?”

I stared at his open palm skeptically, mulling over the idea in my head.

I glanced at his soft expression, his eyes unfailingly giving me a feeling of warmth I had never experienced before. Finally, I laid my small hand in his palm.

The dash down from my balcony was a blur. I felt hands underneath me and wind pushing my hair so it was in-front of my face. His feet hit the ground with barely a thud, but it still scared me.

I wasn’t allowed out of that house. Not unless it was school or something my parents dragged me along to, like grandpa’s funeral. I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t even let me out if the building was on fire.

The grip on my hand tightened as he led me to the park, past the gardens and under the big tree we sat under earlier.

I sank down against the trunk, feeling its rough surface braise my back as I hugged my knees to my chest. He sat beside me, like he had at grandpa’s funeral.

We sat in silence for a while.

I felt the cold air grip me through the thin fabric of my shirt. I shivered.

Suddenly I felt a warm embrace around my shoulders, the soft touch and musky odour drawing me into the embrace and away from the harsh grip of the cold.

He gave me his jacket.

I hugged the smooth, hemmed edges and pulled them towards my chest, desperate to keep the warmth in.

“Are you okay?” Joon was facing me, his big eyes full of worry. I looked away.

“What do you know about Seungho op-, Seungho-sshi?” I refused to call him oppa, not after what happened.

He smiled at me. “What do you want to know?” he said teasingly, folding his arms behind his head and leaning on the rough bark.

He meant to say it as a joke, but I put quite a bit of thought into his question.

What was I aiming to accomplish from this? Why did I run to the other side of the park with him, a boy I barely knew? But I really did want to know how he knew Seungho opp- I mean, Seungho-sshi. I told myself that this was purely just curiosity that led me to follow him, Joon.

I didn’t speak for a while. I let the thoughts in my head run around first before I said anything I would regret. He didn’t protest, closing his eyes, waiting at ease until I spoke.

How could he do that? I was away from my- no, neve… that place will never be my home. But I was still safraid. The confused saturated my body as I gazed at his face, only returning to my previous thoughts when he turned to look at me out of the corner of my eye.

Finally, I spoke.

“How do you know him?” I asked, my expression hidden in my hair. He chuckled softly.

“We’re cousins.” He stated simply “and we were close too. I used to go over to his house all the time to hang out with him when we were young-“

“Was he always like this? Was he always mean?” I cut him short, the words flying out of my mouth as my thoughts became sound. I covered my mouth in horror of speaking out.

“Omo! Mianhaeo oppa!! Please forgive me!” I bowed frantically. I did this for Umma and Appa, when they accused me of something, usually something that I didn’t do.

He looked at me seriously and raised his hand. I looked away, afraid of his big strong hand. Why had I gone off with him? He’s going to hurt me, like…he did…

As I scrunched my eyes tighter, I felt warmth on my arm. I flinched.

Slowly opening my eyes, I saw that he was looking at me again, his ever-kind gaze unfailing as it melted all the fear away.

What is this feeling?

“It’s okay Jae Hwa-sshi, really, you don’t need to apologise to me” He said tenderly “I already told you, I won’t hurt you”

I relaxed, leaning against the tree trunk again “Do you know?” I asked again,

He sighed.

“No. He was not bad. He didn’t like the things he was doing, but he had to and once he had gotten the habit, he refused to stop” he turned to look at my face “I know he didn’t mean what he did to you Jae Hwa-sshi”

I looked away.

Of course he didn’t mean to.

Of course he didn’t mean to lure me out and comfort me only to knock me down again.

Of course all those harsh words and all those bruises he inflicted were innocent.

Of course he only did it because he had to and not because of the money.

Of course he didn’t mean to break my heart.

(A/N: Sorry for the lack of updates lately, I’ve been busy with all the going on elsewhere. On the up side MBLAQ is making their comeback soon! ^^ Thank you for your patience!)