10/11/15

“Do you really have to go, Ri?” Jiyong asked in a small voice, almost like a whisper. He has been asking Seungri the same question for the last 3 hours, and Seungri was getting slightly irritated. Nevertheless, he endured and reminded himself to keep calm, so he answered softly, “yes, Ji. I have to work, you know. It won’t be gone for long”. He continued packing up his stuff into his luggage, it was almost done anyway. His flight is in 2 hours, and he decided to spend his last few minutes with Jiyong in a happy mood, but the older seemed to be upset since he woke up this morning. “But I want you to celebrate your birthday with me”, Jiyong mumbled again, his voice broke a little as he looked down. Tears were pooling at his eyes, threatening to fell down any moment.

Seungri panicked upon seeing Jiyong on the verge of crying. He had always been defeated by Jiyong’s tears, he never want the almighty G-dragon to cry, especially if it’s because of him. He glanced at his watch and figured that he must deal with this fast, he has to leave soon. Seungri stepped towards Jiyong, who was standing at the younger’s doorframe, sobbing soundlessly. He tugged on Jiyong’s white and long arms, holding it tenderly with both of his chubby hands.

“Jiyong…” Seungri called out carefully, not wanting to upset the older more. Jiyong kept his head down, refusing to answer or look at Seungri. Seungri sighed quietly, and tilted Jiyong’s head upward slightly, so that they were both face-to-face. “Jiyong, please look at me. Look at me, hyung” he tried again, cupping Jiyong’s face gently. Jiyong looked up and locked eyes with the younger, his eyes expressing his innermost thought and feeling. He knew he was being immature and selfish for not understanding his lover, but can’t he just be a little selfish for this time? The truth is, he’s tired, and he’s tired of having to hide his relationship with his beloved Seungri. He wanted to be alone with his lover, they had been working hard for the MADE tour and the awards they had to attend. He was looking forward to spend his time with Seungri for the younger’s birthday, only to find out that the latter had to leave Korea for a few events. He couldn’t hide his disappointment and sadness upon seeing his maknae leaving in less than 2 hours, which made him shed his tears in front of Seungri. Jiyong rarely cried in front of others, he didn’t want to appear weak, but all his pride crumbled when he’s with Seungri. It’s like, he was bared and transparent in front of the younger, he didn’t need to hide anything and just let out all his raw emotions to Seungri.

“Ji, you know I can’t cancel this, right? This event is very important for me. It’s not like I want to to be apart from you. If possible, I also want to be with you on my birthday, celebrating and cuddling with you all day long. But that was just not possible at this time, Ji. Please understand me, neh? Don’t make me feel guilty to leave you in Korea. And, it’s only for a couple of days. Just hang out with some friends, and I’ll be here again soon, okay? I will come back to you” Seungri persuaded, trying to calm his lover and making him stop crying. “Now, stop crying or you’re not getting any goodbye kiss from me” Seungri threatened a bit, wiping away the fallen tears on the Jiyong’s cheeks. Jiyong hiccupped a bit, trying to muffle his sobs and stop his tears. Seungri continued caressing Jiyong’s cheek until he felt the latter relaxed and leaned into his palm. He felt relieved as Jiyong calmed down fully, his mind eased a bit before he leaned to kiss his Jiyong goodbye.

Seungri leaned closer to Jiyong’s face slowly, prolonging the moment and intensifying their desire. Their lips touched lightly at first, small pecks as if giving and returning silent words of promises and love. Eventually, the kiss became more intense, increasing the pressure on each other’s lips and savouring the sweet taste of their kiss. Jiyong lifted an arm over Seungri’s neck, pulling the latter closer and deeper into the kiss. Seungri moaned a bit when he felt Jiyong’s warm tongue grazing over in between of his lips, asking for more. He parted his lips slightly, in which Jiyong quickly shoved his tongue into the wet cavern of his lover. Their tongue intertwined aggressively, fighting for dominance. The younger gave up almost immediately, letting Jiyong and tasted every corner of his mouth, savouring and remembering the taste of it until they met again. After some time, the kiss became slower and eventually they let go of the other’s lips, panting heavily after the intense kiss.

“Wait for me, Ji. I’ll come back to you. I love you so much” Seungri breathed out, embracing Jiyong’s body for the last time at the front door.  “I will, Ri. Don’t ever forget me. I love you too” Jiyong tightened his arms around the younger, breathing in the scent that he will surely miss. They stayed like that for a few seconds, before letting go of each other. The time must have flown fast when they’re together. Seungri stepped back and carried his luggage, before giving one last wave to his lover and walked out through the door with heavy steps.

Jiyong leaned his back against the front door, sliding down his back until he was sitting on the floor. He felt empty, like a huge part of him was lost and he couldn’t feel anything. He felt lifeless and numb. It’s just been a few minutes but he’s already missing his maknae. Tears started to formed again, blurring his eyes and eventually fell on his delicate cheeks. I feel like I’m dying, why is this so painful?  He put down his head on his knees and continued crying for a long time, until he fell asleep, his heart longing and calling out for his lover.

12/12/15

Jiyong scrolled down his phone, he had been spending about an hour to read any news or pictures about Seungri. He need to keep track of his maknae, and made sure that Seungri didn’t do anything harmful or bad for their reputation. He could have just called or texted Seungri, but his pride won’t allow it. He was still in his silent treatment mode for Seungri, he felt jealous that the latter wanted to spend time with his friends rather than him. Since Seungri left for Taiwan 2 days ago, he hasn’t contacted the latter at all, though Seungri did sent him a few text messages and called him, but he just ignored all that. He needs his Seungri, not the younger’s text messages or calls.

After some time, he decided to log out of his SNS and scrolled Seungri’s videos that he had diligently taken during their concerts, backstage or even at home. He has countless pictures and videos of Seungri, securely saved in his phone. And he treated his phone as one of his most treasured possession; it’s the only thing that could only relieve his longing for Seungri when the latter is not by his side. That one video caught his attention; the one he took when the fans and members celebrated Seungri’s birthday during one of their MADE tour in Japan. He didn’t initially planned to record the moment, but Seungri looked so adorable when blushing and grinning like small kid, so he decided to capture the moment forever in his phone. He circled around Seungri while holding out his phone; he wanted to make the latter feel like