#9: What’s the use of saying sorry, if it’s just gonna hurt again?

“Ready?” Jackson whispered, staring at the clearly nervous older who nodded slowly while the cheering in the background never stops, asking a kiss from the pair.

With one last deep breath, he took a step forward before placing his lips on to those pinky ones earning cheers and claps from everyone, it was important to convince everyone on their special day especially the reporters and media.

Jackson smile proudly upon seeing those pink cheeks on the usually cool Mark after he pulled away, the older look so cute that he almost squash him in a tight hug but refrained himself.

After that heart pounding moment, it was only the celebration left with their families and guests which they genuinely enjoyed, acting like a pair without them even realizing.

“Are you thirsty?” Jackson asked after noticing how Mark look a bit tired after entertaining their acquaintances and clients who obviously well wished their marriage.

Mark nodded, indeed his throat was dry because he didn’t had a sip of anything from earlier due to the nervousness.

“I will go and get some, why don’t you rest for a bit?” Jackson said worriedly after dragging the older to their table, settling him down before disappearing to retrieve some drinks.

“Mark shii.” Bambam greeted smiling which Mark welcomed, finding it weird that he didn’t spot the other from earlier unlike his best friends who right now clearly having fun mixing with the crowds.

“Bambam, just call me, Mark hyung. Did you just arrived?” Mark said, smiling as he patted the empty seat beside him.

“Yes, I’m sorry that I arrived late.” Bambam said, feeling guilty but he had a situation to handle before arriving here and he needs to talk to Jackson about it too.

“No problem, you alone?” Mark asked, noticing that someone was missing but he guess maybe it’s difficult for Park Jinyoung to attend their wedding especially with the relationship he share with Jackson.

“Bam, you are here.” Jackson’s voice was heard as he appeared with two glasses of drink and a slice of their wedding cake.

“Congratulation, hyung.” Bambam greeted, hugging his best friend who clearly glowing and looking very happy today, it makes him hesitate to share the situation.

“Thanks, Bam. Did you eat yet?” Jackson asked, taking a seat at his spot before passing a glass to Mark who gladly accepted.

“No, not yet.” Bambam answered before smiling at how Jackson just force feed a spoonful of cake into Mark’s mouth.

“I don’t want you to faint again, eat.” Jackson nagged, preparing the second scoop for Mark who just sighed at the nagging younger.

“It was just that once and to be fair, I was having a bad fever.” Mark defended himself causing Jackson to laugh at the cute older.

“Well, it doesn’t matter. I can’t have my Yi En fainting again, it makes me worry.” Jackson cooed, pinching those squishy cheeks which makes Mark blushed again for the second time, today.

“Ew, cheesy…” Bambam teased causing Jackson to burst out laughing while Mark just feel like hiding in a hole from the embarrassment.

“You are just jealous.” Jackson rebutted, sticking his tongue out at the younger childishly before they burst out in laughter again causing the duo that’s heading to the table to become curious.

“What’s all the fun without us? It’s not fair.” Youngjae complained as he plopped down beside Jackson while Yugyeom just smile, taking a seating in between his best friend and Bambam.

“Hey Bambam..” Yugyeom greeted, surprising everyone except Youngjae who clearly the only one who knows about the two.

“Hey…” Bambam greeted back awkwardly, not expecting the other to acknowledge him in front of the others but at least it would be less awkward between them now.

“You guys know each other?” Mark asked lost as he shared a look with Jackson who was just as lost about this piece of information as him.

“We used to be high schoolmates.” Bambam confessed while Yugyeom nodded along, feeling a bit disappointed that the other didn’t share their past relationship with everyone.

“What? You didn't even said anything to me, Bam.” Jackson complained, finding it amazing at how he didn’t thought of it especially after noticing the expression change in his best friend when Yugyeom arrived in Jeju last time.

“Sorry, hyung. Seeing how you guys relationship are before, I didn’t thought it was a bright idea to share it with you so I just keep quiet.” Bambam apologized while Jackson instantly feel sorry because of his stupid hatred, his best friend can’t even share things with him.

“Don’t be, Bam. I’m the one that supposed to apologize to everyone including Yi En, it must be hard for you all to deal with the childish and short tempered me but I hope everyone will forgive me.” Jackson apologized sincerely as he entangled his hand with Mark’s under the table.

“It’s fine, hyung. We understand but you better don’t hurt my Markie hyung from now on.” Yugyeom exclaimed, jokingly warning Jackson which surprised everyone but the older nodded, nevertheless.

“Don’t worry, I will try my best.” Jackson said before staring at Mark lovingly causing the trio to ‘ew’ at once before bursting out in laughter at the now embarrassed him.

Mark smiled in pure happiness as he watch everyone chatting away even Jackson with Yugyeom, he couldn’t ask for anything more than this.

While chatting away, Bambam suddenly remember about the situation that he almost forget to share with Jackson.

“Hyung, can we talk?” Bambam called out, earning a nod from Jackson before they moved away from the table without realizing Mark was watching them, curiously.

“What’s it, Bam?” Jackson urged on after seeing how the younger seems to hesitant to share with him.

“Jinyoung hyung, he has been missing since morning. I can’t seem to find him anywhere just now, that’s why I was late.” Bambam shared causing Jackson to sighed, he really thought the reason Jinyoung wasn’t here was because he might feel uncomfortable attending that’s why he didn’t questioned Bambam anything from earlier.

“Did you check his apartment?” Jackson asked, getting worried since it’s a bad idea to leave a depressed Jinyoung alone, he might do something silly again.

“Yes, twice but no signs of him.” Bambam said, getting frustrated himself as he spend almost half of the day searching for his best friend.
 
 “Well, I need to go. We can’t just stay still about this, we can’t risk him doing anything stupid again.” Jackson said while Bambam is in a dilemma because it’s obvious the older can’t just leave like this during the wedding.

“Are you sure? What about Mark hyung?” Bambam asked, knowing it’s not the best idea to leave your wedding ceremony just to find for a missing friend.

“He will be fine, Jinyoungie needs me now.” Jackson said assured before quickly zooming out of the wedding hall, not even waiting for Bambam’s reply nor realizing Mark overheard that last bit between them when he planned to approach and ask what’s wrong.

“Mark hyung.” Bambam exclaimed when he noticed the older standing not to far from him with an unreadable expression.

“Isn’t it funny how he promised one thing but he did the complete opposite? I guess a person like me would always be fine, right?” Mark said, smiling bitterly before walking off, leaving Bambam too sighed at the messy situation.

At this moment, angry would be an understatement because he was furious, at the fact that Jackson could do this to him and their parents because of Park Jinyoung.

“Yi En, where’s Ka Yee? Our relatives are looking for you guys.” Mrs Tuan called out but instantly noticed the expression on her son’s face.

“What’s wrong, dear?” Mrs Tuan asked while Mark just force a smile back on his face, knowing that his mother already detected something.

“Nothing, Ma. He just left earlier because of some errands.” Mark lied, didn’t want to cause more worrying to his mother.

“What? How can he? Is he crazy?” Mr Wang’s voice was heard as he appeared with Mrs Wang and Mr Tuan which cause Mark to sighed.

“Our relatives are waiting, let’s talk about this later.” Mrs Wang said, trying to calm down her husband which luckily succeeded as they bring Yi En to greet the elders from respective family.

By the time everything ended, Mark was exhausted and he wasn’t in the mood to discuss with their parents over the missing Jackson.

“I will talk to him, don’t worry Daddy. Go ahead home and have some rest.” Mark assured as his sent his parent in law to their car outside the hotel.

With a sigh Mr Wang nodded, feeling bad for his son in law who had to deal with all the questions earlier but he was proud of the boy, he handle it with such calmness.

Once he was done sending both set of parents off, he said goodbye to Youngjae and Yugyeom before driving off to their condo.

At this point, all he wanted was to dive into that soft bed and sleep away all the emotions he is going through but of course, he wasn’t so lucky so he ended up on the couch, flipping through channels as he still unable to sleep.

While watching some drama that was playing, his phone suddenly beeped and when he checked, it was from a unknown number which cause him to hesitate to open, wondering if it’s something that’s gonna break his heart again.

With all the curiosity left in him, he pressed open and regret it almost instantly as he stares at the picture of Jackson and Jinyoung kissing by the beach.

You might be the person he married but you are not the person he loves. You are the third wheel in this relationship.

Mark’s eyes reread those words over and over again until he throws his phone across the room in anger, it makes him realize that’s it useless giving chances to someone over and over again just to have him trampling on it, each time.

Meanwhile Jackson could only watch in silence as Jinyoung stare into the night sky, that sudden kiss still playing in his mind.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” Jinyoung croaked out while Jackson sighed, he is going nuts at this point because after spending hours locating his best friend, he finally found him just to be surprise with a kiss out of nowhere.

“Jinyoungie, I heard from Bam about you…” Jackson trailed off, knowing that he needs to talk this out with Jinyoung at some point.

“I guessed so, you were acting different the last few days.” Jinyoung pointed out, still staring at the sky while Jackson inwardly glup, didn’t expected that his actions are that obvious.

“No, it’s just..” Jackson tried to resoned but where cut by Jinyoung who finally turned to look at the clearly distressed Jackson.

“It’s fine, I know that you don’t see me as anything more..” Jinyoung said, forcing a bitter smile on his face before turning to look away at the waves crashing.

“I treasure you and..” Jackson trailed off, trying to say those words without hurting Jinyoung but it seems that the other had no plans to carry on listening to him.

“Don’t say those words, Jackie. Go ahead, return back to Mark. He is waiting.” Jinyoung exclaimed without looking at the other, eyes just focusing on the waves.

“Jinyoungie, you are important to me and..” Jackson tried again, trying to explain but paused when he saw Jinyoung covering his ears with both of his hands.

“Just leave me alone, Jackie. I will be fine.” Jinyoung hissed out, closing his eyes which just worries the other even more.

“Jinyoung…” Jackson called out again, trying to make the other face him this time round.

“Go!!! Just go!!!!” Jinyoung shouted, pushing Jackson away with tears in his eyes, stunning the other who instead of listening, pulled him to a tight hug.

“I’m sorry.” Jackson whispered over and over again, rubbing the sobbing other’s back without realizing the smile on Jinyoung’s hidden face on his chest.

In the end, Jinyoung is in his embrace until he fall asleep before he carefully carried the other to his car and drive off to send his best friend home before heading home himself.

By the time he reached their condo, it was almost dawn due to the hours spent driving back from the beach located out of Seoul.

“Mark, why aren’t you in bed?” Jackson asked in shocked when he finally noticed the older who's just sitting on the couch, watching him.

“What should I feel about you spending our wedding night outside?” Mark asked, ignoring the other’s question as he stares at the younger with an unreadable expression.

“I can explain..” Jackson tried to explain but paused when he heard the dry laugh coming from Mark who slowly got up from the couch and approached him.

“Can you?” Mark mocked with a smirk on his face which clearly caught Jackson off guard, it’s a side that he never seen before from the older.

“Why are you being so sarcastic? I just went off for a few hours, it’s not a big deal.” Jackson hissed, not liking at where this conversation is heading, not when Mark Tuan is acting like that.

“So greeting our elders from each family it’s not a big deal?” Mark snicked in disbelief which got the other to look down in guilt almost instantly.

“I’m sorry.” Jackson apologized, knowing it’s his fault for running off like that even before greeting the elders, he was sure their parents are upset too.

“Like I said before, sorry don’t solve everything.” Mark pointed out, tired of those words when it’s obvious that it didn’t help nor change anything.

“Can you not be like this? I’m tired enough.” Jackson exclaimed, almost begging because he knows it was his fault but there wasn’t need to be acting like this especially after a long day and night.

“You are tired and I’m not?” Mark asked, almost amused at the younger’s words which cause Jackson to sighed as he stares at the clearly offended older.

“You know what? While we are it, let’s make everything clear. This marriage is purely just an act, we will act accordingly in public but in private, let’s live our own lives. I would like it if we stay out of each other business.” Mark added, deciding that it’s best if he just say those harsh words now because he might be unable to say it the next time facing Jackson.

“Mark..we didn’t agree on this..we were suppose to fix everything.” Jackson pointed out, shocked by those words since they did promised to work things out together.

“What is there to fix when there’s nothing to start with, Jackson Wang?” Mark said, laughing bitterly as he avoided staring into those hurt eyes in front of him.

“Yi En, please don’t do this.” Jackson said, trying to grab hold of the older’s wrist but Mark avoided it before turning, his back now facing the other.

“Before I forget, I already cancel our honeymoon. I don’t think we need one.” Mark announced before walking away causing Jackson to chase after him in distress upon hearing the news.

“Are you crazy? Why are you acting like this?” Jackson shouted as he caught on to the older’s wrist, turning Mark to face him.

“Yes, infact I am crazy therefore I don’t plan on sharing a room with you either.” Mark answered, pulling his hand harshly out of the younger’s hold before walking off to his room and slamming the door close.

“Mark..” Jackson sighed, messing up his hair in distress at trying to understand at what just happened to his Yi En who had always been patience and calm all these years.

Neither of them could really sleep after that, Mark could only twist and turn in bed while Jackson just plopped himself on the couch, mind still clouded by millions of things.

By the time Mark actually exited his room, it’s almost noon because he had only really fall asleep about an hour ago and he was surprised to see a dazed Jackson on the couch.

He had expected the younger to be in his room, sleeping but here he was seated, looking half dead which Mark purposely ignored, quickly walking passed him and straight into the kitchen.

Seeing how he didn’t had much appetite either, Mark just make a sandwich for himself before enjoying it quietly at the counter, not noticing the pair of eyes watching him from far.

Jackson slowly make his way closer, not sure on how to approach the older who by now had noticed but just ignored him.

“Can I have a bite?” Jackson asked carefully, sliding in the seat beside Mark who instantly stopped eating before getting up from his seat, ready to walk away.

“Yi En, please. Why are acting like this? “ Jackson begged as he quickly grabbed hold of that wrist before Mark had a chance to avoid it.

“It hurts, isn’t it to be treated this way?” Mark asked, turning to look at the face who's desperately asking him to stop.

“Sadly, it’s nothing compare to what you put me through for your fun and games.” Mark added, smiling sadly at the younger before shaking the hold off him.

“In case you didn’t know, a person like me isn’t always fine. I’m a human too, not a robot.” Mark said before walking away, not sparing even a single look at the younger who by now had realized that the older obviously had overheard the conversation between him and Bambam.

He messed up, big time that’s for sure.

####

Mark stared out of the window, watching the raindrop slide down the glass as it started to drizzle outside which signalled a upcoming downpour.

Sighing, he finally looked away before grabbing his phone that has cracks across its screen as a result of his anger earlier, the screen cracked just like how his heart did.

It’s obvious that whoever had been sending these pictures are clearly out to ruin him and the younger and he shouldn’t let it affect him, like always but Mark is human too, there are times when things get too much for him.

He knows that being the older one, he should be wise and rational but he can’t, not when he got lied to over and over again, he has his limit and Jackson just crossed it.

While deep in his thoughts, he heard knocks on his door before the younger called out to him a few times which he ignored at first but slowly got annoyed when Jackson didn’t stop.

“What do you want?” Mark asked when he swinged open his door, rolling his eyes at the grinning younger in front of him.

“Let’s go.” Jackson said, excitedly as he reached out to grabbed the older’s wrist but Mark immediately pulled out, clearly not in the mood to go anywhere.

"No, I’m not going anywhere with you." Mark said, making it clear before trying to close the door on the other but Jackson who had expected that, quickly use his body to prevent the close before scooping up the older in his arms, making Mark squeaked in surprise.
"Put me down." Mark scolded, trying to wiggled himself out of the hold but Jackson just smirked, his gonna make sure his plan work.

"No, you are going with me." Jackson stated before continue his way to the front door with the complaining Mark in his arms, bridal style.

Once he had make sure to locked up their condo after exiting with much difficulties due to the complaining older, Jackson heads to the lift area where they are greeted with a few other neighbours waiting for the lift.

Mark turns red when he noticed that he was the centre of attention especially with a elderly couple smiling at them fondly.

“Put me down, people are watching." Mark hissed softly, hiding his face away from the others while staring at the amused Jackson who clearly enjoying every bit.

"Sure but promise me, you need to follow me." Jackson offered, there was no way he would let the older free that easily.

"No, I’m not going." Mark rebutted back, he's not gonna just give in to the younger so easily like always, he can be stubborn too if he wants.

"Fine,  just let them watch." Jackson whispered into his ear, turning him more red than he already was while their neighbours just laughed at the pair.

“Just put me down already, I will follow you." Mark sighed in defeat, he can't handle those staring anymore or he might just explode.

“Thank you, Dimsum." Jackson cooed after he put down the older, kissing him on the cheek that obviously caught the older by surprise.

Before Mark could react, he was dragged into the newly arrived lift by the grinning Jackson and that’s how the whole awkward lift ride begin.

By the time they reached the carpark level, they are only accompanied by the elderly pair and the words that they said once out of the lift caused Mark to blushed hard.

“You guys are so sweet, love each other for a long long time.” The elder lady said, patting Mark’s shoulder while her husband nodded, smiling at the pair before they walked away hand in hand, leaving the pair to admire them.

“I wish we can be like them.” Jackson muttered in admiration which Mark clearly caught on but ignore it, he was still furious at Jackson Wang.

“Your hand?” Jackson exclaimed, asking for the older’s hand which cause the other to be lost as he hides his hand away from the younger.

“What for?” Mark asked, staring at the younger in suspicion which caused Jackson to shake his head in amusement before looking for that hand and entangled with his.

“It feels just right.” Jackson exclaimed, looking at the wedding rings causing Mark to looked away while trying to calmed his thumping heart.

It’s gonna be difficult, very difficult to stay angry.

A/N: Hello! I'm glad everyone enjoyed last chapter fully, hope you will enjoy this chapter too. 

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InfinitelyCassie <3