Yixing doesn't show up at the movie set for the next couple of days which isn’t exactly something new, seeing as he hasn’t been visiting in the weeks leading up to his confession to Yifan either. However even his best friend Lu Han can’t contact him, the service interrupted wherever the author is. Zitao can’t connect a call either and when he asks Shixun, the student avoids answering the questions concerning Yixing’s whereabouts. Even Yixing’s agent can’t reach him, having been told by the author that he will be away on a little vacation. There is nothing for him to do on set anyway, and he can use the time off to create new stories, Yixing had claimed.

Yifan thinks it's for the best. To him it means that the younger is giving him time to think and go through all the information he was presented with. Of course there is a pinch of doubt in him that Yixing might just be using the reincarnation story as an excuse to get away from him but when Yifan thinks about it deeply, he realizes that the shorter male doesn’t have any motive to do that, especially not when their relationship has just started to blossom. Sure they haven’t been together for long but Yixing never lied with malicious intent before and when he does tell a white lie, Yifan can tell quickly. There’s a reason why Yixing writes and doesn’t act. Concluding that everything the younger told him must be true, the taller male tries his best to focus on his script, constantly itching to reach for his phone to text Yixing but stopping himself every time, not wanting to make the other feel pressured. Instead he waits until the author is willing to talk to him.

The day after his talk with Yixing, YIfan tried to get in touch with people who can give him more insight into what Yixing is going through. One person connected him to another and yet another, Yifan’s script resting unread on his lap until he was able to get an appointment with someone who could actually help him. He worked hard on the set, focusing on his job to help distract him from thoughts of running to Yixing and embracing the smaller man tightly. There were times when he would look at his mobile device longingly, silently hoping that it would buzz with a message from Yixing only to be disappointed when his break ends with no text from the younger.

Right when Lu Han wraps the filming up, Yifan removes his robes and dons his casual outfit. He takes a nap in the car while Minseok maneuvers it and takes them to their destination. It’s in a dingy building located in the outskirts of downtown, nestled in the middle of hutongs and the busy streets of the city. His manager shakes him awake when they arrive and Yifan pulls his cap down and his mask up before stepping out of the vehicle.

Mr. Lin’s office is simple; white walls with a few abstract paintings and some Buddhist symbols scattered here and there in the small space. When he welcomes Yifan and Minseok into his work space, they find out that the man is in his mid-50s with the spirit of a twenty-year old. He sits them down in front of his table, offering them tea before taking his own seat.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Wu. What can I help you with?”

The actor isn’t sure if he can truly trust this person but Minseok said Mr. Lin was referred to him by a reliable source and he doesn’t look like a scam, at least not yet. Yifan clears his throat after sipping on the tea, thankful for the warm fluid that soothes his dry throat.

“Can you tell me about reincarnations? Is it really possible for someone from the past to be reincarnated?”

The man smiles at him and nods, taking a book from the shelf behind him and opening it to a page relevant for Yifan’s inquiry and passing it over to him. Then he starts talking while the actor and his manager browse through the parts related to their query, nodding along to important information and evading questions about the reason for their apparent curiosity about the topic.

Yifan comes out of Mr. Lin’s office enlightened. He is surprised that though there might not be a thousand of them there are still some documented cases of reincarnation, not just in China but all over the world. The reason why this happens is still unclear but some suggest that it may be because of the soul's unfinished business or that the deceased were sent to someone's body on a mission. The tall male giddily jumps into his car, instructing Minseok to take him to Yixing’s place next, wanting to see the younger now that he has a better understanding of reincarnation. When he messages the author about his short notice visit, the response he receives leaves him gaping at his phone, frozen at the words he keeps re-reading.

From: Babe❤️
Yifan I think it's better if we end this now.

The elder receives nothing further even when he wakes from his shock and sends more messages to the author, even calling him, the line remaining busy even after many tries. Yifan still goes to Yixing’s place despite the lack of response, hoping to be able to force the shorter male out of his apartment or ask Shixun to open it for him. But when he arrives only for the door not to be opened, he curses himself then for not asking for the passcode when they had just started dating.

Feeling his sanity fraying at the seams, Yifan turns to Lu Han, calling the other to inquire where Yixing might be, not needing to tell him it is urgent because he is certain his manager has been exchanging messages with the director about their whereabouts and what they’ve learned. Although he can feel the elder’s reluctance, Lu Han gives in and entrusts the author’s home address in Changsha to him with a warning that Yixing might not be there either considering how even the shorter male’s parents are not answering the director’s calls. Yifan just thanks him and leaves Yixing’s apartment building for his own, instructing Minseok to buy him a plane ticket and do an online check-in for him while he packs his bags. He’s lost Yixing once, he’s not letting it happen again.

“Are you sure about this?” Minseok asks, looking at his watch that tells him it’s already past eleven in the evening. He’s pretty certain that even if Yifan were to arrive in Changsha in the next hour it still wouldn’t be appropriate to knock on someone’s door at that time.

“One hundred and ten percent.” Yifan responds, doing a last minute check on his things before picking up his backpack and walking out of his room.

“Yifan, I think you should leave tomorrow instead. It’s already late. I’m sure it won’t hurt to leave in the morning.”

“It’s already morning by the time we get to the airport,” the actor answers flatly while choosing a footwear from his cabinet, “Besides, I’ve wasted enough time, Ge.”

“I understand that but what if he isn’t there?” Minseok stands in front of the entrance, hoping his measly figure will be enough to make the taller male stop from pursuing his plans. “You’re going to ruin his parents’ sleep.”

“I have to try to find out.” The actor gently moves his manager out of the way before unlocking the door and stepping out of his flat.

“You’ve gone crazy,” Minseok answers behind him, securing the safety of his talent’s apartment before taking the spot beside Yifan to wait for the elevator.

“Blame Yixing.” The taller male shoots back, eyes stuck on his phone while he sends yet another message to the author.

“Maybe I should.” Minseok rolls his eyes even though he knows his talent can’t see it. “But I can’t really say it’s a bad thing that he makes you go crazy.”

“I think you’re the only person on earth who’d say that,” Yifan says as he pockets his phone, worry still evident in the lines on his face.

The drive to the airport is shockingly smooth aside from the few traffic jams they encounter – which don’t really take that long for them to get out of – and the layer of snow that Yifan’s van can plow through with no troubles. They arrive just in time for the taller male to go through security and get to his gate, texting Minseok before his plane takes off.

From: Minseok Ge
Come back here with Yixing or else all of this will have been for nothing

Yifan smiles a little when he sees the message, replying with an affirmative before placing the device back in his pocket in hopes of catching some sleep before arriving in Changsha. He has been up and about since three in the morning yet the excitement and nervousness from the possibility of seeing Yixing again make it difficult for him to calm down enough and when they finally land at their destination, his head hurts from the lack of sleep. Still, he goes through immigration and takes his baggage without showing a hint of exhaustion, hailing a cab once he’s out. He’s thankful that at least no one seems to have noticed him, he reckons it might be because of the cap and mask covering his face. And if people did notice, they didn’t believe what they saw – their sleep-muddled minds unable to process that a celebrity just walked past them.

His heart beats loudly in his chest when the taxi driver tells him that they’re nearing their destination, the GPS placed on the dashboard giving Yifan a clue of just how close they already are.

1 kilometer. He thinks to himself as he reads the words.

500 meters. Yifan can feel his palms sweating as he reaches for his wallet, taking out a few hundred yuan bills to cover for his ride.

10 meters. The destination mark is so close that the car icon is practically covering it already.

“We’re here, sir,” the driver tells him and points to the house to their left, its lights still turned off as it is ten minutes to five o’clock. “That should be the house you’re looking for.”

Yifan nods and thanks the driver, handing him the money and even though it is more than what is necessary to cover his fare, he doesn’t wait for the change. Instead he steps out of the vehicle with his backpack and walks up to what he assumes to be the Zhang household. There’s a sign above the mailbox that says 张 and the actor just hopes that there aren’t that many Zhangs around this area before he presses the doorbell. He swallows once he hears the sound ring through the house, debating whether he should hide somewhere and only come out when he sees Yixing opening the door. Before he can decide, however, the porch light turns on and a woman comes out of the front door and spots him, pulling a thick jacket around herself when she walks closer to the gate.

“Good morning,” the woman greets him, friendly and warm, sleep clinging to her voice. “How may I help you?”

The actor can see Yixing’s soft features in her face and for some reason he suddenly feels relieved.

“Ah, umm,” Yifan tests out his voice, not liking how nervous he sounds, “G-good morning, Ma’am. Sorry for disturbing your sleep. But, uhm, does Yixing live here?”

He can see shock in the woman’s eyes, a hand covering when she gasps ever so silently. “How do you know my son?”

Yifan breathes in and decides to pull down his mask then, “I’m Wu Yifan, Ma’am. It’s nice to meet you.”

The Zhang family – just like Yixing – is welcoming. They allow Yifan into their home, the elderlies in the house engaging him in small talk while Yixing’s mother cooks them breakfast and her husband prepares the table. Unfortunately, the person the actor came to see is nowhere in sight.

“Is Yixing here?” Yifan timidly asks Yixing’s grandmother. The elderly woman looks towards her husband who just shrugs. Before she can answer, however, Mrs. Zhang comes out from the kitchen with a tray carrying tea and porcelains.

“I’m afraid Yixing is not here.” She places a cup in front of Yifan before pouring the drink, the actor scrambling to stop her so he can do it instead. Yixing’s mother dismisses him and just asks him to serve Yixing’s grandparents instead which he does with no complains.

“Where is he?” Yifan goes back to questioning again. “And, umm, do you have an idea when he’s coming back?”

The tall male can see hesitation in the eyes of Yixing’s mother when she gazes to her husband, hoping he will give her a helping hand. Yixing’s father then takes the seat to Yifan’s left, thanking the younger when the actor offers him a cup of tea as well.

“He left for Guangzhou yesterday.” Mr. Zhang finally answers, holding his cup with both hands to warm his palms.

“You missed him.” Yixing’s mother adds a little woefully with a sad look, knowing that Yifan and Yixing share a connection based on how her son talked about the actor.

“Did he say why he went there? And where exactly he will be going?”

Yifan can see apprehension in the eyes of Yixing’s father but Mrs. Zhang squeezes her spouse’s shoulders in reassurance before moving to his right so she can stand closer to their visitor. There is still hesitation in her expression despite knowing that the man in front of her is the one her son talked to her about, the one he says he feels a deep connection with.

“It’s okay, Ma’am. If you’re worrying about Yixing’s condition, you can speak freely. He already told me about it.” Yixing’s grandparents and father seem surprised my the revelation but Yixing’s mother remains calm.

“I know he did.” Mrs. Zhang smiles and places a hand on Yifan’s shoulder. “But I’m afraid we can’t tell you where he went or when he’ll return since we don’t know either.” She walks around the actor to sit on the chair to his right, his gaze following her. She inhales deeply before looking up and into Yifan’s eyes, her gaze piercing through his soul.

“Ever since he arrived back here, he’s been having nightmares every night and they’ve been worse than ever before. We all thought that they had become less frequent, at least compared to when he was a kid but,” she halts and clutches at her skirt, rumpling the fabric. Yifan places a large hand over her smaller ones in encouragement and as if to say that he’s there. “He said so himself, that the nightmares have worsened and that’s why he flew home, hoping it will get better when he’s here with us. I had no idea that he didn’t inform you about him coming back here.”

“It’s alright. I thought he was just giving me space and time to think about what he told me.” Yifan’s other hand tightens around the cup, his vice-like grip threatening to break it. “I should have known not to leave him by himself. I’m sorry.”

Yixing’s mother shakes her head, drawing away her hands from beneath the actor’s before taking Yifan’s face in her palms. “There’s nothing for you to be sorry about. This has been happening since long before you two met. There is nothing you could have done to make it go away.”

“Still…” Yifan looks down on the ground, forehead creasing, taking the blame after his reaction from Yixing’s revelation, “hearing from you how hard it has been for him since he came here…I…”

“It’s okay.” It’s Mr. Zhang who interrupts this time, the middle-aged man placing a hand on the actor’s shoulder. “Yixing is strong and whatever reason he has for going to Guangzhou, we just have to trust him that he knows what he’s doing.”

“I do trust Yixing but,” Yifan lets out a shaky breath, “I can’t help worrying for him.” He looks up and turns his head to meet the elder’s eyes, “You can’t contact him either? He didn’t say anything else before he left?”

Yixing’s father swallows and shakes his head, answering carefully, “The only thing he told us is that he must go to Guangzhou and find closure there. e don't know how he'll do that but he demanded that we stay behind.”

“Yixing…” Yifan gives in and places his face in his hands, voice sounding small with a silent cry of the author’s name, frustration seeping through his whisper. He’s mad at himself for not voicing out his acceptance of the shorter man’s confession and for not showing empathy when he knew he had to.

“All we can do is wait.” He feels Yixing’s father squeeze his shoulder. “Going there without knowing where he is will be like searching for a needle in a haystack.”

“I must try,” the actor answers with determination, shaking his head when he leans back once more, pulling away from the misery he has immersed himself in. “No matter how difficult it might be, I have to find him. He shouldn’t be alone right now.”

Yixing’s parents share a look before Mrs. Zhang cups the actor’s cheeks once again, looking at him as if he is her own child.

“If you’ve decided on it, then have a meal first and get some sleep before you leave.”

“You seem very important to him.” Yifan is broken from his reverie, hand tightening around the picture frame in his hand after the voice startles him. It’s Yixing’s mother, leaning against the doorframe of the author’s room. The actor was given the chance to enter the younger’s room, sleep in the bed Yixing used and take a look around once he has gotten the rest he needs.

Mrs. Zhang comes in and looks at the picture in Yifan’s hand, one taken during the author’s high school graduation. Her voice turns sad and the actor passes her the frame. “After the way his first boyfriend reacted, he never revealed the truth to anyone besides Lu Han.” Yixing’s mother looks up at him, a silent wish falling from her lips, “We hope you won’t betray his trust.”

Yifan feels both pressure and gratitude at the woman’s request, his lips quivering when they stretch into a smile, “I won’t.”

The smile he receives from Yixing’s mother alleviates the pressure slightly, her eyes widening a little before forming crescents. And Yifan can’t stop himself from thinking that her smile is very similar to the author’s, the want to see Yixing only becoming stronger the longer he stays in the younger’s childhood home.

“We really can’t do anything to make you stay and just wait for Yixing? You are welcome to stay at our house for as long as you want,” Mr. Zhang says as they enter the airport together with Yifan, the taller male trying his best to hide behind his cap and mask. He didn’t have a lot of trouble flying from Beijing to Changsha since it was late at night but now that it is the middle of the day, his height and distinct figure are making heads turn and people around him do double takes. However, he doesn’t want to lose any more time in finding Yixing and pushing back his flight for a later one would do exactly just that; waste more precious time.

“I’m sorry, I know I wouldn’t be able to sit still but thank you for your offer.” The actor’s smile is hidden behind the mask and he can only hope that the author’s parents can read it in his eyes.

“Okay,” Yixing’s father answers resignedly, stopping at the check-in counter to allow Yifan to go through the procedure. Once the actor is done, they walk with him until they reach the entrance to immigration.

“If you find Yixing, please tell him to call us.” Mrs. Zhang asks for a favour. “We’re growing more worried by the day.”

Yifan, out of pure instinct, leans down and embraces the woman and promises her that he will call them once he is with Yixing already. He also gives the author’s father a hug before taking his leave, turning to wave them another farewell before completely disappearing into the other side of the airport.

Once seated comfortably in the lounge, the actor tries to reach Yixing again, shutting his eyes tightly when he hears the automated response telling him the dialed number cannot be reached. He types another message to the author even when the hundreds of texts he has sent to the other have not been replied to. The tall male looks out to the tarmac, wishing he could already board the plane and fly to where the shorter male is, hoping that being in the same city will help calm him down.

“You’re where?” Minseok shouts from the other end of the line. His voice is so loud that Yifan has to put a distance between his ear and the phone.

“I’m in Guangzhou.” He repeats, as if the elder didn’t hear him the first time. The manager groans and Yifan can only imagine how scrunched up his face must be, frustrated that he can’t strangle his talent at the moment.

“Yifan,” the Korean says between gritted teeth, irritation bleeding through his words, “you are aware that you only have one week for your break and then we’re flying to Hong Kong for another movie.”

“I know. I know,” Yifan answers while he steps out of the airport.

“What if you don’t find him within that time?”

“What if I do?” The younger retorts, knowing his manager will support him as soon as the initial shock of being informed of Yifan’s plan wears off. “I have to at least try, Ge.”

“Fine.” He hears the elder let out a breath as if he is convincing himself that it will be alright. “Just get your back here by next week. And maybe Yixing’s too.”

“Thanks, Ge. I’ll call you when I get news of Yixing.”

After ending his call with Minseok, the actor once again gives Yixing’s number a ring, only to be answered by the voice-recorded response. Not knowing where he should start searching for the author, Yifan decides to get some rest first and strategize, hailing a cab to take him home.

Without giving his mother a call, Yifan heads straight to their old house and notices a man pacing outside the gated house. He leans on the window as the taxi inches closer to its destination, the male’s familiar figure making his eyes bulge out. It's Yixing.

The actor asks the taxi driver to stop the car even before they actually reach the house, giving another excessive payment and jumping out of the car as soon as it halts. The closer he gets to the man, the more distinguishable the other’s features are becoming even in the fading sunlight.

“Yixing.” Yifan reaches for the man’s elbow, effectively getting a reaction from the other when he turns to face the taller male. The actor’s assumptions are proven correct when he sees Yixing, in the flesh, looking up at him. “What are you doing here?”

“I…” Yixing’s eyes are unfocused even when he is staring at Yifan. The taller one’s heart breaks when he sees the lost expression on the other’s face, seeing a hint of fear in his eyes which he can only assume to be due to his presence.

“You know where I live?” The elder asks in confusion, looking the smaller male up and down to inspect whether he’s hurt, palming the author’s shoulders and arms.

“No...I don’t…” Yixing answers, fingers fiddling with his shirt while he looks everywhere except at Yifan. 

The brunet looks so lost and the taller one has to fight the urge to just kiss Yixing and envelope him in his embrace and whisper words of reassurance into his ears.

“M-My feet led me here,” the younger eventually answers honestly, closing his eyes and letting the memories flash by before opening them to look at the house again. “Jia Shuai led me here.” 

When Yifan looks down, he sees how battered and dirty the smaller male’s shoes are, telling him how far the other must have walked.

“This is our ancestral home,” the actor says, hoping to catch the younger’s attention but to no avail. “It’s been in our family since a long time ago.” True enough, the house has an old foundation dating back in the 1800s but there are additions to the estate that are very modern, including the new house a few meters away from the old one.

“Yixing,” Yifan can’t help himself, cupping the younger’s cheeks to make the other face him, “let's go inside and talk.”

“No...no…” Yixing shakes his head, pulling away from the elder, lost in his own thoughts. “I need to do this on my own…”

“What do you have to do?” The elder takes the smaller one’s face in his hands again. “Tell me so I don't have to worry.”

Yixing doesn’t break away from the other’s hold but he still looks at the house longingly when he answers, “I have to find someone.”

The taller male swallows, nervous of the answer but he still inquires, “Who?”

“The one who Jia Shuai fell in love with. He gave me a name a few days after I arrived in Changsha.” The younger looks down at the ground, eyes unseeing as if he is reminiscing, “I…dreamt of him. I didn’t see his face,” his eyebrows furrow in frustration at this tiny detail, “but I heard myself calling his name.”

“Then tell me who it is and I'll help you.” Yifan once more tries to make the smaller man look at him, leaning down to gaze at the other’s eyes in hopes of making eye contact and taking his attention.

“Li Jiaheng.”

Yifan stands frozen in front of Yixing, the familiar name causing him to release a shuddering breath. A wave of panic overtakes him and for once he is grateful of the other’s loss of focus because it helps him hide his own growing anxiety.

“What…what will you do when you find him?” He asks the younger, stumbling over his words but the other doesn’t seem to notice.

“I don't really know, Yifan. I'm so,” Yixing falters, forehead creasing, “so confused. I don't know what to do. I don't know how I got here and what I’ll do when I find this person. I…” Yixing’s knees give in and Yifan, even with the bile rising up his throat, manages to keep the younger steady in his arms. 

With his focus redirected to the younger’s well-being, the actor momentarily forgets what Yixing came here for and urges the other to enter the house, successfully maneuvering his way to the new building without meeting any of his family members. They head for a room that's always reserved for Yifan, the second-floor room overlooking the older house.

“Stay here. I'll get you food.” Yixing looks sickly thin and fragile in Yifan's eyes. “Have you even been eating?” The shorter male shyly confesses that he can’t remember the last time he had a meal.

No wonder he almost collapsed, Yifan thinks as he sits the author down on the bed, clicking his tongue in annoyance at the other’s lack of responsibility over his health.

“Yifan, please,” Yixing latches onto the actor, not wanting him to leave, “I need to find this person.”

“I need you to eat first, Yixing.” The taller male implores, unable to stop himself from leaning down and kissing the other’s forehead even though he isn’t sure if he is still allowed to do so. “Please.”

Thankfully, the brunet sits back the next time Yifan tries to leave, head facing the window where he can see the old house. The elder reluctantly leaves him behind to look for food and try his best to evade his mother’s questions.

Li Jiaheng. Yifan ponders on the name while he takes the hallway to the dining area, surprising his family members with his sudden visit. Fortunately, they let him off with the excuse that he needs to rest. With enough food to have him and Yixing survive for two days, he scampers off to hide back in his room.

How do I tell him? What will happen when he finds out? What does meeting Li Jiaheng have to do with Jia Shuai’s unfinished business, if that is why he got reincarnated?

The tall male almost trips on the staircase on his way up with his thoughts running wild in his head, taking his attention away from what’s in front of him. He shakes his head and tries to distance himself from those thoughts, deciding that he can sort himself out later as soon as he has Yixing sleeping on his bed.

Even though he seemed reluctant at first, Yixing follows Yifan’s instructions and eats the food served to him, only finishing a small portion of it however before pushing it towards the elder. Upon observing the brunet, Yifan finds that the other doesn’t look as if he wants to break up with him, contrary to the message he sent to the actor before. However, he also doesn’t seem to be clinging to the elder either. The taller male assumes that it is because Yixing is too focused on achieving what he came here for first before figuring out where his and Yifan’s relationship is going to head. It makes the actor feel anxious, afraid that once all of this is over, Yixing will remember his words and push the elder away once more.

“Yixing, let's rest first after eating, okay?” Yifan the younger’s hollow cheek with the back of his hand. “You look like you really need a little downtime.”

The author looks up and meets his eyes, a little livelier now that he has some nutrients in his body. But then his voice comes out tinged with despair and a demanding undertone, “I have to see him now, Yifan."

Swallowing at the younger’s reaction, Yifan balls his hands into fists, “Why? Can’t you do that tomorrow?”

“No.” Yixing returns to his unfocused self, shaking his head as he turns away from the taller male again. 

“My nightmares have become worse and more frequent to the point that I haven't been able to sleep. At all.” The author’s hands clutch the bed sheet and the elder can hear the pressure of stress heavy in his voice when he looks up and adds, “Please Yifan.” 

For the first time since they saw each other again, the elder is able to look at the smaller’s face properly with the help of the light on the nightstand. He finds dark circles under Yixing's eyes that weren't there when he last saw him, proof that his nightmares have been keeping him up lately. Yifan looks away and inhales sharply, trying to think of how best to resolve the younger’s problems, finding himself left with only one solution. He doesn't want Yixing to be in distress anymore. A little more resolute, he turns and captures the other’s attention.

“I,” Yifan starts, looking at an expectant Yixing, “I am Li Jiaheng.” 

Yixing’s mouth opens when the actor finishes his sentence, eyebrows knitting at what the elder told him.

“But you're Wu Yifan,” Yixing says slowly and matter-of-factly, looking at the taller male as if he has gone mad.

“Wait, are you…” The author trails off, placing a hand over his mouth before leaning as far back as he can, away from the elder. Yifan isn’t sure of what Yixing wanted to say but he isn’t exactly fond of the way the younger reacted to his confession. Afraid that the other is taking it as him joking around in order to get him to submit and stop, Yifan explains further.

“I changed my name when I moved back from Canada. It was my great great great great great grandfather's name.”

Yixing opens his mouth wider, raising his other hand to have both cover it.

“No…” His eyes are wide and his voice makes it obvious that he is in denial, “no...no...this...no....this isn't happening...tell me...tell me you're lying…” Yixing bursts into uncontrollable sobs as a well of emotions lodges itself in his chest. He’s not prepared for this. He didn’t even imagine that this will happen even if he came here aimlessly and with just one goal in mind.

“Yixing,” Yifan tries to pull the younger closer to him even as the author tries his best to be as far away from the other as possible, “please tell me what's going on. Please, so I can help–” The actor stops in his tracks when he sees the smaller’s eyes roll to the back of his skull, eyelids fluttering shut, body turning limp in the elder’s hold.

“Yixing!”

Yifan expected to see Yixing with his eyes open minutes after he collapsed but when he doesn't wake up right away the actor decides to bring the shorter male to the nearest hospital with the help of his relatives. They are shocked by the presence of the stranger but help Yifan without questioning nonetheless when they see his agitated state.

Once at the hospital, they rush the unconscious man into the emergency room, Yifan in hysterics as the hospital staff comes to check on the brunet. Immediately after the doctor has examined the author, Yifan is at the physician’s tail asking about Yixing’s state.

“It’s fatigue,” the doctor manages to answer after blinking one too many times when he sees the Wu Yifan in front of him. “It might be because of too much stress, by the looks of it he doesn’t seem to be he’s in the best of health – his eyes are sunken, his cheeks are hollow and his lips are pallid. But we’ve already put a line on him so he can regain all the important electrolytes and nutrients he lost. We’ll have to admit him though so we can keep him under observation.”

Yifan doesn’t think he has ever nodded or thanked someone so much before as he nods to and thanks the doctor who is attending to Yixing, following the physician’s suggestion to put the author in a private room. When his relatives ask about the stranger, the tall male just tells them he’s a close friend, not exposing the kind of relationship they have even to his closest kin. Once he is left with his mother, however, he is unable to hide the truth.

“I’ve never seen you panic like this over somebody.” Yifan’s mother pats and caresses down his back while her eyes scan Yixing’s features as the author lies on the bed, asleep. “You can be honest with me, Rourou.”

“Ma.” Yifan tries to sound irritated at being called the nickname from when he was a child, but that tone never really registers to his mother either way. “He’s important to me.”

“I can see that.” Yifan’s mother gives him a knowing look before she moves her gaze towards Yixing again. “More important than just a friend, am I correct?”

The actor swallows and slowly looks up at his mother, “You’re not going to judge me, right?”

“I’m your mother, of course I’m going to judge you,” Yifan bites the inside of his cheek, unsure of how to read his mother’s tone, whether he should see it as sarcastic or serious, “but your happiness has always been the most important thing to me, Yifan.” The tall male breathes a sigh of relief, thankful that their life in Canada has taught his mother to be a little more liberated than her own parents and respect him and his choices. “If you’re happy with him then that’s all I need.” The actor can’t stop himself from embracing his mother tightly, whispering words of gratitude to her and her acceptance of who he is despite the revelation being quite abrupt.

Yifan’s mother takes her son’s face into her palms and gives him a once over before announcing her leave, “I will come back tomorrow with food. Hopefully, he’s awake then so I can meet him properly.”

“Ma.” The tall male hesitates, biting his lower lip. When his mother nods to encourage him to continue, he decides to let the question out before it takes too long for him to bring up the topic. “Do you know anything about your great great great great grandfather Li Jiaheng? You know, the one you named me after?”

“Why are you suddenly asking about him?”

The actor shrugs, pretending the question doesn’t weigh too much, “Just curious.”

His mother shakes her head but answers either way, “Aside from him being a good scholar and an officer in his time, there were rumors going around back then that he had an affair with another man.” Yifan gulps, the hand he has over Yixing’s limp one tightening.

“Do you…do you know what happened to the man?”

“As far as I know,” his mother’s eyebrows knit as she tries to remember more about the story passed down over generations, “they were separated by force and there were stories going around that the man was sent off to an island.”

“And grandfather didn’t do anything?” Yifan says with a distasteful tone.

“He couldn’t do anything.” The middle aged woman shakes her head, sad for the couple whose love was never accepted despite the concept of homoual relationships having been more accepted back then. “His father threatened to kill his lover if he tried to find him and if he did they would both be dead.”

“I know it’s sad,” his mother gives his shoulder another squeeze, “but if you think about it, if they had been together then there’s a possibility that you wouldn’t be here and you wouldn’t have had the chance to meet Yixing.” Yifan nods in response, knowing full well that all those events led them to where they are now. His mother is right, if it weren’t for the sacrifice their forefathers made, he and Yixing would not have met in this lifetime and Yifan doesn’t think he could live with that.

It’s the morning after and even with a comfortable bed for him to lie down on, Yifan was unable to get a good sleep, tossing and turning and standing up to check on the younger one every now and then. At six o’clock he decides to drop all efforts to find proper sleep and just sits beside the author’s bed.

The actor reaches up and the brunet’s awry hair, pushing back the fringe that’s falling over his closed eyes. Like this, Yifan thinks, Yixing looks peaceful, a stark contrast to when he learned about the taller male being the Li Jiaheng he was looking for, frantic eyes looking at the actor in horror.

“Yixing,” the pleading tone in Yifan’s voice falls on deaf ears, “please wake up.” It’s worrying Yifan that the younger is still asleep even after having closed his eyes a good fourteen hours ago. He’s afraid that the other’s unconsciousness has something to do with being Jia Shuai’s reincarnation, that there is some sort of string that connects the two even now that Yixing has found him, his Jiaheng.

“Whoever you are,” Yifan speaks to no one in particular, uncaring of how he must appear like a lunatic talking to thin air. He is at a loss on how to approach this, all knowledge he has recently gained about reincarnation thrown out the window as nothing but worry fills him. Yifan knows it probably won’t work but he can’t think of how else he would communicate when the author is still deep in slumber. The actor looks around only to find the morning sunlight filtering in through the half-opened blinds before he continues, desperate, “I don't know if you can hear me but please,” the tall male swallows, a sob threatening to escape his mouth, “please don't make Yixing’s life any more miserable. Please. He’s suffered enough already.” He grips Yixing's hand in both of his, kissing the younger’s soft knuckles and brushing away the hair that covers Yixing's beautiful features.

Yifan thinks that Yixing had irrationally assumed that their relationship is bound to follow the same path as Jiaheng’s and Jia Shuai’s, which is why the author started panicking at the actor’s revelation the night before. Uncertain but determined, the elder whispers to the shorter male.

“Yixing, I don’t know if you can hear me but I promise you we will be different from them. I will fight for you, Yixing. I will stay with you.” His warm breath ghosts over the back of the younger’s hand, his words seemingly unable to stir the other to wake. “Please come back to me, Xing.” Tears spill from his eyes unconsciously, droplets falling on the spaces between the sleeping figure’s fingers. Yifan closes his eyes and kisses the back of Yixing’s hand, lips moving against soft skin when he confesses, “I love you.”

A gasp interrupts the silence and when the taller one blinks his tears away to look up at the author, he finds Yixing slowly opening his eyes, lips moving to speak. Only when Yifan has jumped up and enveloped the smaller male in his arms does he hear what the other is trying to say clearly:

“Love you too.”

A/N: Merry Christmas everyone ^~^ Epilogue will be posted later :3