Loud booming beats busted the windows of the SMent building dance studio one gloomy afternoon. Inside it was one gloomy boy busting away his emotions through passion-filled movements. Lee Taemin resorted to dancing, his first love; in order to comfort himself from the loss of his other first love. He didn’t want to sink deeper into depression. Keeping himself busy with something he loved doing the most was the only prevention he could think of as of that moment. He hit every beat hardly, as hard as his raging emotions. Taemin swiftly slid through the dance floor as if he was trying to slip away from all the self-hate that was trying to eat him. He spun his signature spin, hoping this would shake off all his insecurities. Taemin continued dancing for hours and hours, without any breaks. Though his graceful and powerful dancing was full off emotions, his face ceased to show any. He was tired emotionally. He was too tired on the inside that he didn’t notice that he was wearing himself out. He didn’t even seem to worry about his decreasing energy nor did he realize that the studio’s music player ran out of battery. Though the studio grew silent, he continued to dance to the sorrowful singing of his heart. All of a sudden, while he was in the middle of a mid-air spin he grew weak on his knees, causing him to land horribly. His body hurled across the floor and landed on his back with a loud thud causing his vision to grow hazy. Taemin groaned as his back started to ache. His body then started to feel cold and hot at the same time. His muscles throbbed out of severe exhaustion. As he lay flat on his back, sweat from all over his body flowed and formed a puddle around him. Tears then slowly streamed down from his eyes while he tried to catch his breath. Now that he stopped moving, his thoughts and emotions resumed their war. For some people, staying still kept them at peace but not for Taemin. He found peace in expressing himself through dancing. Now that he was brought to a stop, peace has left him once more.                 

Out of nowhere, Taemin heard a voice in his head saying, “Promise me you’ll take care of yourself”. Taemin once again remembered Naeun’s last words from the fateful night.

“LIAR!” screamed Taemin furiously, knowing that he broke this promise the way she broke her own promises. Taemin felt an unusual rage in his heart. He didn’t know whether he was mad at himself for failing to keep Naeun, or at Naeun for leaving him without explanation and for breaking her own promises. It was common for him to be angry with himself for his failures but he was never ever angry with Naeun. He couldn’t bear get angry at her even at times when she hurt him back when they were together. He would defend her till the end, even from himself. Especially during their last conversations. Though Naeun threw discouraging words at him, Taemin refused to grow hatred towards her. He loved her that much; resulting into him hurting this much.

“If she outgrew you, maybe it’s time for you to outgrow her” said another voice.

Remembering those words that he heard earlier that day, Taemin’s tears stopped from falling. He pondered even more on this thought, setting aside all the pain even just for a while. He was reminded of the very reason why he went to the dance studio. It wasn’t to focus on the different pains that were haunting him but to distract himself from them. To lie down and focus on how much it hurts would just show that he contradicts his own convictions and decisions. He felt inconsistent all of a sudden.

             “Ya, do you really want to give all of them a good reason to call you immature? To call you weak? To tell you to grow up? Are you not sick of hearing all those?” Taemin thought to himself, remembering the childish image he was labeled with by countless people. Taemin embraced his youth, but sometimes he didn’t know the difference of being childlike and childish. He wasn’t childish because he was ignorant like those other delinquents. He was just really…..innocent. He was playful, joyful and he loved himself the way he was. But as the years gone by, he grew sick of being so, maybe because of all the pressure that was pushed against him. He wanted to be a real man.  He wanted to “grow up”. This insecurity of his was one of the top factors that causes him to blame himself for losing Naeun. Ever since Naeun's became his, he had that burden and desire to be "manlier". Now that he thought that maybe if he was “man enough” he wouldn’t have lost her. He kept thinking that he should’ve done better than best. But as he lay there pondering on these, a certain thought took over. He thought that maybe God brought this trial onto him so he could finally take the first step to manhood. Maybe Naeun left so that he could have enough time and space to grow as an individual. Maybe this is what Jonghyun told him this morning. It was all starting to connect. The thought of this sparked motivation inside Taemin. His desire to grow up took over his heartbreak. He finally distracted himself from his broken love. For now. The “first step” he could think of during that situation was to pick himself up from the floor and so he did. He struggled to lift himself up from the floor. During his first attempt, his left hand slipped from the sweat puddles, leaving his left arm slightly sprained. He grunted as he held his aching arm. “Get up, Lee Taemin, She gave up on you, but you shouldn’t give up on yourself..” he thought to himself as he tried get on his feet which he eventually did after several tries. Although he was finally able to rise up from staying dead on the floor, he wasn’t exactly steady on his feet. His knees were trembling. He hasn’t fully regenerated. He dragged himself once more and limped towards the door. Slowly but surely. As he neared the door he clenched onto the doorknob right away then he pulled himself upwards to support his tired legs.

*tchick tchick – tchick tchick*
As Taemin grabbed on to the doorknob, it suddenly twisted by itself. There was someone twisting it from the other side.
“Annyeong hasseyo?” said a muffled voice coming from the outside. Taemin limped sidewards in order to pull the door open. Standing outside the door was a blond-haired, slim young man wearing a mismatched funky-looking outfit. In his hands were a towel, a water bottle and a coat. Though his clothes seemed off, this person managed to still look fashionable. Taemin’s vision was hazy and it took him awhile to recognize this person’s face. It was Key, and he looked dead-worried.  Key immediately rushed towards the worn-out boy to help him up and wrap him with the towel. He opened the water bottle and gave him a drink to rehydrate him. Though Key was worried, he wasn’t in shock of what he saw. Sure, they went under the same artist-training program in which they have dance training and get tired together but there was something more to that. Being far away from their families, he took care of Taemin like his own child and he knew exactly what this was. Seeing Taemin drenched up in cold sweat, pale, panting and exhausted was nothing new to him. But what caught his attention was how Taemin held on to his other arm. He was used to seeing Taemin burn himself out with dance training but an injury was new to him.
“Taemin-ah, your arm. What happened to it?” Key asked as he frantically wiped the sweat off Taemin with a towel.
“My arm slipped…*puff*…wet floor...” replied Taemin wearily.
“Aigoo.....how many times do I have to tell you to take care of youself. You’re soaked up again, if this building weren’t heated you would’ve froze to death. Do you know how much illness you could develop from this cold weather?”  lectured Key as wrapped Taemin up with the towel and coat.
“H-hy-hyung…” said Taemin, starting to shiver.
“Shhh…enough talk. Let’s get you home” comforted Key as he carried Taemin home. Key felt that Taemin was about to collapse soon and the most practical thing to do was to get home immediately.

            Key was pretty calm all this time not only because he was used to what he saw, but also because he already knew what Taemin was going through. Jonghyun told him everything before he headed to fetch Taemin. He knew what bothered him and he knew exactly why he went out to dance. He knew that Taemin wouldn’t stop dancing until he forgot about his problems, and seeing that Taemin was already trying to head out, he knew that Taemin had solved at least one thing. Key may have warned Taemin about the risk of young love but he chose not to scold Taemin at that Taemin because he knew how it felt. This was a learning experiencing for him. Key hushed him when he tried to speak because he didn’t want Taemin to explain his situation to him. He didn’t want the boy to recall his pains. Just like Jonghyun and the two others who lived with them, Key knew Taemin very well. They took care of him and inspired him. Though Taemin could get clumsy and immature at times, they knew what he is capable of. They knew that he will grow up to be a great man and they made sure to help him reach his highest potential.