With a shaky clenched fist, out of nervous, and with a determine inhale, I knock on the wooden door.

Why does this house doesn’t have a doorbell by the way?

What if he didn’t hear my knock?

Should I knock again?

No wait, should I call him instead?

 

Deep in thought, I didn’t even realized Yeongjin had open the door and gasp in surprise

Not until he actually call me out of my thought, “O, ya, you’re here!”

 

I snapped up and smile nervously, clutching onto my handbag for me to remain calm, “Annyeong… Yeongjin-a.”

 

“Annyeong, come in, come in.” he step aside to let me step in. “I thought you wouldn’t come.”
 

‘And I thought you were just kidding yesterday before you text me for confirmation last night.’ I thought to myself. “Well, I decided to come.”

 

He closed the door and led me upstairs, which I think might be where his room located, his hand on my back. I didn’t even realize I was looking around searching for another breathing creature until Yeongjin actually mentioned it. “My family wasn’t home at the moment.”

 

Wait what?

 

So it’s just the two of us?

Right now?

And why does he sound okay with it?

I mean, a boy and a girl, alone in a house, there should be unspoken rules to that!

Oh my god, is he actually just kidding?

That must be it.

There’s no way he wouldn’t find this situation awkward right now, right?

 

He must have finally realized my worries that he suddenly stopped on his track, in the middle of the stairs. He looked at me horrified but quickly masked it with a smile. “I mean, they’re just out for a short amount of time, they’ll be back before we even realized it. They actually bring me along but I thought maybe you would come so I stay. It’s okay.”

 

I must have sighed loudly when we continue walking, he smiles to me reassuringly. I have to smile back.

 

I like Yeongjin’s smile. Because he didn’t just smile with his lips, he also smiles with his eyes. And his smile wasn’t just a smile; it’s like more than just a smile, like it’s really meaningful.

 

And to tell you the truth, I actually have a crush on him. I’m actually kind of an introvert and everyone pretty much figured it all up and started to leave me out but Yeongjin didn’t. He talks to me gently, like he actually cares about me and he tried to fit me in with his friends. Thanks to him I actually fit in the class again and don’t feel pressure anymore.

 

I think Yeongjin is quite amazing. In my eyes, he is like a hero.

 

When we arrived in front of his room, Yeongjin smiled shyly to me, “sorry, my room was kind of messy. Hope you don’t mind.”

 

And before we actually enter his room, he warned me not to speak my thought loud. I have to laugh at that. He’s cute when he fluster.

 

When I get in, I was actually quite amazed. I mean after what he had told me, I was actually expecting a messy room but what greets me is actually the opposite of what I thought.

 

What the hell?

What does he mean by ‘kind of messy’?

His room was neat. At least, better than my room!

 

Yeongjin was already sitting in front of his table while I was still in a dazed. I snap out of it and look at him. On the table, the books scatter everywhere, even on the edge of the table! He must have studied a lot.

 

I slowly walk toward him and carefully sit in front of the table.

 

“What are you doing?” Yeongjin asked in baffled.

 

I looked at him questioningly, my eyes wide, “hmm?”
 

“I mean…” Yeongjin blink, “you have to sit beside me, it’s quite intimidating if you sit in front of me.”

 

I open my mouth in realization but at the same time, my heart race.

 

Sit beside him? In this small table? Why does his table have to be small too by the way?

 

Clumsily, I stand up and walk toward his side before settling down again.

 

‘Too close.’ I thought nervously and scooted a few inch away from him.

 

But he scooted closer to me.

 

I have to bit my lip from cursing out loud. Okay, I need to calm down. Being like this won’t solve the situation. I mean, we need to discuss our homework’s answer together anyway.

 

But do we really have to be this close?

Can I just sit at the front again?

 

He clear his throat and placed his work in front of me, with his body bend more toward me, he said, “so I was a little unsure with my answer on this question, how do you solve this one?”

 

When he turns to look at me, our proximity was so close, I almost felt his breathe on my face. I blinked a few times.

“I’m sorry, what?” I asked, nervously.

 

He didn’t answer my question, instead, he continue to stare at me, or maybe with my wild imagination, sometimes on my lips.

 

“This won’t do it.” He whispered.

 

I frowned.

 

He look into my eyes, “can I kiss you?”

 

I open and close my mouth a few times in absurd, “wh-what?” I asked breathlessly.

 

Is he playing with me?

But why do I feel like he’s getting closer now?

He’s so close I think he might able to feel how fast my heart is beating.

 

“Can I kiss you?” he repeated.

 

“I heard that.” I quickly answered. “But, why?”

 

I’m quite surprised how calm my voice sounds like when actually, I feel like jumping out of the window now.

 

He continues to stare at me and smile, “because I like you.”

 

I must have look so dumbfound, he finally scoot away, still smiling.

 

Wait, so no kissing?

And why do I sound so disappointed?

I shouldn’t be though.

I mean, stop it, this is confusing, I don’t even know what I want.

 

Yeongjin was still watching my reaction, his elbow was propped on the table and he rest his head on his hand.

 

“I like you. I like your eyes. I like your lips. I like your hair. Oh, and I like the smell of your hair too. I always like to stand beside or behind you so I can smell your hair. What kind of shampoo do you use? I like your perfume too by the way. I like the way you actually try to be with people and how you want to give them attention when they need it.” He stops. “Should I stop? Do I sound creepy?”

 

I shake my head, slowly yet shakily, I reach for his free hand, he look confuse by my action.

 

“I like you too.” I voice my courage. “Thank you for standing up to me when everyone else ignore.”

 

And he smile. Like his biggest smile of the year. He suddenly recompose himself and lift his head up, “this won’t do, let’s just continue with what we’re supposed to do before.” He said, turning to his book, his smile plaster on his face brightly.

“But…” I whisper and he turns to me wonderingly.

 

I quickly give him a peck on his cheek and scooted toward the table to see his work. He was surprise for a few seconds before he grins boyishly to me. “Ohooo, you’re getting naughty, who taught you that?”

 

“Shut up.” I said, not looking at him.

 

There was a few seconds of silent before I felt his lips on my cheek. It stayed there for a minute before he finally move away and finally look at his work too, his body leaning toward me.

 

My cheeks feel so warm, I think I’m actually blushing so hard that I have to place my cold hand on top of it.

 

Then we continue to study with Yeongjin constant skinships (he told me it was an accident and it was out of habit but I don't think so) and Yeongjin actually lied to me, his family was gone for 2 hours.

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Haven't proof read.