Expectations are continuously upon me like weights on my shoulders. I am constantly in one place then another with schedules, constantly battered with makeup on my face, gilded with fine clothing, and eating exquisite food from various parts of the world with my infamous identity, G-Dragon. Although this may seem glamorous to people, when will there be time for me? I am just a boy. I, too, want to one day live a normal life, whether it be freely dating, eating fast food, or merely sitting down. 

Being a public figure is not easy either. People praise and reward me for my renowned song lyrics and music, but don't people understand? I have poured my emotions and hard work, and blood into those 3 minute songs that is simply used for enjoyment. My music describes my whole life. I was that xx, just trying to be one of a kind, but am I that different from everyone else? I may seem to be the Korean dream, but I feel as if  I, Kwon Jiyong, am far from that. The color of my heart is black, but should that stop me from living my life?

Is there an ending to suffering? Can I be free like a butterfly? When will I breathe from my drowning world? Can I runaway?

I feel as if I am crooked in this mess of a world.

I slowly looked over my balcony to see the beautiful city lights of the night that hypnotized me in awe. My throat suddenly felt warm as a gust of wind blew towards me. It felt as if a lump was stuck in my throat as my heart beat quickened. My shoulders shook as a warm, wet streak slid down my face. 

Even though my life seems grand, why do I still feel sad?

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