Title: I’d lie 
Pair: You x One (1Punch)
Summary: He can see through everything but my heart. If you ask me if I love him, I’d lie 

“They say that highschool’s the time where you could really feel the giddy kind of feeling when you’re inlove. From the smallest kinds of moments to just about anything grand. Highschool was the most ideal when it came to having ‘moments’. They’d tell you it’s not love but you would know for sure that even if it wasn’t love the feeling of just being with that someone you like would make you feel contented. It didn’t matter either if that someone had another person in their heart. Even just being friends was enough but until what extent would you believe that what you feel is real?” You paused from typing as you stared down on your computer scratching on your neck while re-reading the whole statement cursing why your class would require you to write down thoughts about love. It’s no longer February so you didn’t see a reason at all for such a topic. 

It felt weird and yet it felt good being able to write down these things. In your small circle of friends, you were the only one who wasn’t exactly as musically inclined as them. So they were all probably going to make a song or even a rap during the presentation of this paper and there you were, you can see it already. Plain, old boring reading. Sometimes it made you wonder why were you even in an art school, you barely had the talent for music or any form of art—from your perspective ofcourse in which people you know would disagree, sometimes you no longer know if they’re only being nice. Startled by the sound of your phone ringing, you bolted up giving a sigh after. 

You got too much into thought that you have forgotten your surroundings. The music continued to play and you could feel yourself getting nervous.

‘Pabo Jaewon’ 

You stared at your screen a few minutes more chewing on your lower lip contemplating whether to answer or not. GDragon’s That XX continued to fill the empty silence of your room. 

You had songs laid out for your friends so you didn’t need to even look at the ID except for this particular person. You didn’t need to look at the name but you seem to always find yourself staring at your handphone each time his name pops up. It’s been a month since you started trying to avoid him, for reasons obviously only he would never pick up easily. 

“Hello?” You finally picked up just as the call was about to end. 

“Finally” Irritation evident on the other line’s voice. He’d been trying to contact you nearly everday for the past weeks, it tore him a little that you started being distant with your small group of friends (him included). Jaewon missed your jokes, your witty comebacks and you in general but it was something he could never admit to himself. You were a friend after all and he cherished each one of you and that was mainly the problem for you. He could see through everything, when one of you and your friends were trying to pretend you’re fine, when you’re really mad or annoyed, he can tell it all, all except what you felt for him. 

There was short silence as you waited for him to talk. This wasn’t like you at all, Jaewon thought. Normally, you two would have been bickering over the phone about him being annoying or interrupting you and your school work. It felt awkward for the both of you, and up until now he never knew why you started acting this way. 

“I… I called to see if you’re still alive” He mumbled, you sat down on your bed watching your feet. He waited for you to say something smart or mean, but there was nothing. Only a few seconds of silence before a small I’m fine escaped your lips. It felt even more awkward for him and no longer knew what to say. “I guess you’re tired… I just called to check up on you. We haven’t talked in a long while I was worried” He added up. Jaewon’s always been a good friend. Everything would have been fine if only you never had these feelings for him. If only you never had these feelings for him then you would have never had a problem with him having a girlfriend. 

“I’m sorry, I just… You know how I need to pull my grades up” You lied again. You found yourself lying quite often since the day he introduced the girl of his dreams to your circle of friends. Now everyone had someone of their own, all except you. They used to tease the two of you to be together instead since you two were the only single ones left, the jokes were nothing and sometimes the two of you would even ride on with the things they say. 

Everything was fun that way, everything used to be fun that way. The only times you could ever be in his arms and acting like a couple, the times you all joked around. Some of your friends just assumed that it probably felt weird for you to be around couples and even if they tried to limit such interactions, at times they just couldn’t. 

“Yes ofcourse…” was all he managed to say and then silence again. This wasn’t like you at all, Jaewon thought again and made up his mind to make you open up to him. You were never really this grade conscious all throughout the years he has known you. You had more alittle above average to good grades more than the fair ones. Never in your life have you ever had anything that failed.

“I’m doing my paper for homeroom… so… I have to finish this up and I have to sleep. You should go sleep too. Good night Jaewon” You spoke softly and carefully. ‘There was definitely something wrong’ Jaewon’s lips pressed into a grim line. You never call him by his name. Never. Eversince you started calling him idiot, it was the only thing you ever called him not even when you were really mad or really down. He didn’t push it and just let it slip for now. 

Bidding his own good night, you ended the call and laid down with the phone in your hands staring up at the ceiling with no things running through your mind. It all felt blank. 

A voice called your name out from nearly a block away as you walked to school. Looking back, it was one of your friends—more like two. The twins were jogging up to you with a smile and a hit on your arm as an early morning greeting. You had to rub each side making a face at them as they linked arms with you right after. 

“Seriously? Why so violent?” You grumbled under your voice giving them both a pout. It wasn’t that you acted cute all the time but ofcourse they were close friends who could see all of your sides but the thing is, not even them knew what you felt for Jaewon. 

Time passed and everything felt normal except for the fact that you kept catching Jaewon’s burning gaze on you in which you only made faces at him that made him relax a little everytime. You were becoming a master at it. Hiding your own feelings. As hours continue to pass, you thought your day would end just the same as it always has. 

Preparing to go home, you had forgotten that today you and Jaewon were scheduled to clean up the classroom. All you had to do was hope he didn’t hear the loud beating of your heart right? But nah, he wouldn’t be able to notice how you felt. He never did anyway. 

You heard your name being called from behind you as stepped up the elevated part from the blackboard to start cleaning up. Whipping your head around you saw Jaewon with a completely serious expression but you pretended to shrug it off. At this point you were sure you could pass being an actor. 

“By any chance….” He started off looking at you straight in the eye, you felt your knees go weak. Jaewon looked extremely serious. . You thought, could he have figured it all out already? “…is the reason for your distance…” He seemed to have a hard time in getting the words out and your heart pounding harder against your chest. You were afraid that he possibly knew the reason already. He called out your name again. Softer this time, more unsure. “do you like me?” Jaewon had finally said the words but he couldn’t meet your gaze. You had to think quick. A playful scoff was your reply as you gave a small forced chuckle. 

“Yah. What are you talking about?” He had his head tilted up again. It was hard for him to ask you that inhopes that what he thought was wrong. You couldn’t possibly have feelings for him… right? He still stared at you as if waiting for your explanation. “I told you already. I’m just busy” You gave him a somewhat assuring smile before turning back to face the board. Heaving a small sigh, if you looked at him any longer you’d probably have your voice cracking and your eyes would start to water. 

“You’re not inlove with me?” Jaewon asked again, you paused then took a deep breath before facing him with a cringing expression. 

Ofcourse I love you, you idiot. 

His eyes continued to stare into yours as he kept walking towards you. Closer and closer. “Do you want me to hit your face with that chair?” You joked like the usual, you joked like it was nothing but infact you wanted to be anywhere but there right now. “You’re such an idiot. Ofcourse not” You laughed it off and continued with your work trying to get the higher part but unable to due your height. You felt his arms around your shoulder and his hand on yours as he tried taking the piece of cloth from you to help you with the chore. 

“Ah. I knew it would be impossible” He finally had a smile on his pretty face. As long as he’s smiling and happy you were… right? “You got me really worried you idiot” He retorted back in which you replied with hitting his stomach. 

“You’re the bigger idiot” You said sticking your tongue out as you just watched him for a while before playfully pushing him off you to run off to the other end of the room wanting to finish up with the assigned cleaning. You felt suffocated around him, you wanted to go. Atleast now he would be less worried. Atleast now you knew that there will never be a chance for you and him. 

And if anyone else notices or asks about your feelings…. You’d lie.