It's not as easy to hate
It hurtsMir giggled while GO was frowning and pouting all the way. Seungho entered the waiting room and cocked his one brow at the sight. "Now, even I'm starting to question who's the maknae here." He made a remark, making Mir laughed out loud and GO's pout became longer. "Okay, Cheolyongie. What did you do to the maknae?" Seungho teased and patted pouting GO's head.
Mir just shrugged with wide smile on his lips. "I didn't do anything. Right, maknae?" Mir joined Seungho in teasing GO.
GO rolled his eyes. "I'll kill you." He croaked out and Mir once again fall into laughing fit. Seungho was shocked at first before he, too, burst into hearty laughter just a second later.
"Oh my god. You sounded like dying frog." Seungho joked though he was actually saying the truth. GO did sound like a dying frog. Well, not that he know how dying frog actually sounded like. But, he bet there wouldn't be much difference anyway.
"You can't laugh at me. I'm a patient!" His voice dissappeared as he exclaimed his last sentence. His voice sounded airy and he coughed a bit.
"But you did a great job lypsynching just now." Mir praised with wide grin.They just finished their stage turn in the studio and now was resting for a bit in waiting room before their manager came to fetch them and bring them to another schedule probably in like another hour...
GO clicked his tongue. "You know I hate lypsynching." He sighed.
"Can't be helped. Who told you to be such a drama queen, running in the rain~" Seungho danced absentmindedly as if he was performing musical in the room, almost knocking himself into Mir who was sitting on the chair.
"That's it!" GO snapped with his barely audible voice.
GO jumped to his feet and started to chase after Seungho around the room. Mir cackled at his childish hyungs. Those two were almost thirty for kimchi's sake but acted like three years old brats.
"And I'm the maknae." Mir shook his head. He stood up and evaded his running hyung until he was at the door. "I'm going to buy some drinks." He announced and left even before he got any reply from any of his hyungs. He doubted they even heard him, being too busy playing around.
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Mir played with the coins in his palm all the way to the vender machine. He bought a soda and two youghurt drink for his hyungs. Sipping on his soda, he made a loud satisfied sound as he walked through the hallway, bowing politely as he crossed his way with some senior artists and gave friendly smile when the rookies idols greeted him.
Mir almost passed through hallway 1, eyes on the three drinks in his hands, trying to balance when he heard a familiar voice calling his name. His first reaction was halting in his steps. He didn't look up. He didn't dare to. But, when that voice called his name once again, he slowly lifted his head up. His eyes widened at the sight of Sanghyun standing a few steps away from him, looking just as surprised. Mir blinked a few times before his eyes flickered past Sanghyun's shoulder.
Seungho and Byunghee were coming their way. The duo were too busy messing around with each other to realise Sanghyun was just a few meters away from them. Still not too late. Without even a second delay, Mir dumped all the drinks in his hands and leapt towards Sanghyun, grabbing the taller man by his collar and yanked Sanghyun through a door nearest to them. Sanghyun was too shocked by Mir's sudden movement that he just let himself being dragged away and literally being tossed into an empty meeting room.
Mir closed the door and went to the glass wall next to the door. He watched as his two hyungs walked past the room, GO was still looking pissed while Seungho had this wide smile on his lips. Too close.
"Cheolyongie." Sanghyun called and put his hand gently over the distracted maknae's shoulder only to get another big surprise in his life when Mir slapped away his hand harshly.
"What the hell are you doing here?" The maknae seethed, taking a step back from the older.
Sanghyun frowned at the hostility Mir was showing him. Mir never treated him like this or anyone as far as he knew. "I'm visiting my noona. She has show here." He answered, still a bit surprised.
Mir exhaled. He peeked again through the glass wall, making sure his two hyungs had left and the area was clear. "Just make sure you don't cross path with Seungho hyung or Byunghee hyung." Mir said monotonously and was about to walk away when two strong hands gripped on his arms almost painfully and his back met the wall with loud 'Thud'.
Sanghyun was towering over Mir. His face showed nothing but displeased and disappointment. "So... The song is really for us, huh?" He was saying about MBLAQ comeback song. He did listen to them. And his consciences were nagging in the back of his head the first time he listened to that song. If they really meant each lyrics, that just made him felt...
He didn't know what to feel actually. He did feel guilty. He felt sad. He felt longing. He felt... Empty. But at the same time, he felt angry. And right now, the anger was overriding all of his other feelings especially with the way Mir was treating him. Mir's treatment on him just made him certain that the song was really meant for him. And Joon.
Mir gritted his teeth and he tried to push Sanghyun away, but it was in vain. Sanghyun had grown much stronger in those times they hadn't met. "Then? What if it is?" Mir provoked even when he knew it wasn't true. All the rumors about them dissing the former members were reporter's way of twisting their words. Since Sanghyun was also a celebrity, he thought the older would know the games in the entertainment field. But based on the way the older was acting, obviously, he believed in the rumor and Mir in all honestly, didn't feel like explaining things out. He winced when Sanghyun's grip on his arms tightened that he felt nails digging into his flesh.
"Is that how you feel about me? Is that really so? Think I'm a lier? A faker when I talk to other people about how I support you guys? So I'm the bad guy here for leaving MBLAQ? That's it?!" He shouted while shaking Mir's frame harshly with each sentences.
"Let me go, Sanghyun-shi!" Mir shouted back, his face flushed in anger.
Sanghyun froze before he slowly let his hands fall from Mir to his sides. He took a step back and chuckled bitterly. "Sanghyun-shi?" He repeated ironically in a whisper. "So, I'm just a stranger now?"
Mir didn't answer. He didn't know how to answer. That just slipped out of his mouth just now. He didn't know Sanghyun would be affected that much.However, he harshly chase away the guilt that was just starting to creep itsway into his being.
Mir watched the older's without blinking and only then he noticed the vague dark circles under the rings of Sanghyun's eyes. He noticed how the bright light in Sanghyun's eyes that he used to love watching was looking a bit dimmer now. His hand twitched a bit in response. He wanted to reach out for Sanghyun who seemed painfully similar to GO and Seungho. Who seemed very hurt. But he restrained himself with all he had that he jad to clenched his hands into a fist, feeling his own nails digging into his palm.
It must be his own imagination. Just because he wanted to believe Sanghyun too was tortured by the distance between them... Mir shook his head. No. Not a chance. Sanghyun chose to leave. He chose it. Why would he be affected? He must be happy. He got to live to his choice. He didn't have the scar like Mir or Seungho or GO had. He couldn't because he was the one leaving that painful scar on them. He was the one turning his back on the left three. He broke them...
"All those times... Never once you contact me. Nor Joon hyung. And you never even pick up the phone when I call you. You didn't reply my text." Sanghyun's voice was now low and weak.
"I changed my number." Mir coldly replied. "And I don't think there's a need to keep in contact with you or Lee Joon-shi." Mir said, seeing the hurt flashed across Sanghyun's face.
"I really care for you guys." He whispered.
Mir took a moment to answer. His eyes softened for a second before those orbs turned cold again as their eyes locked before Mir muttered monotonously. "If you really care, then never ever appear again in front of my hyungs."
"Y-your hyungs... What about me? You don't consider my feeling too? Am I that insignificant to you?" Mir didn't answer, instead, he just left the room quietly. Letting the question hung in the air. But, the answer was too obvious already. He didn't need to put it into words.
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