"Shin, can I talk to you?" Min hyung's voice entered my ear as he sat beside me. I couldn't sleep so I decided to go downstairs and sit on the swing at the front lawn. It held a lot of childhood memories, both the good and the bad, for me. Everything was hitting me all at once. The break up, hyung's marriage, his daughter, my family's easy acceptance of the situation, Go Minam and everything else in between. Maybe going home was not a really good idea after all.

I started to reminisce the childhood that I had spent here in Busan. Those were the good memories - my friends, the school I have been in, the little adventures, MiKa... No. Why her? "Shin, look. About Mika..." Hyung started, effectively stopping me from recalling the happy moments I have spent here. I took a deep breath as I tried my best to calmly talk to him.

"Hyung, do you remember the times when we would ride our bikes and go to the beach?" I looked up at the dark blue sky, trying to count as many stars as I could just to avoid looking at him. I didn't even intend to talk to him tonight but he is still the annoyingly stubborn brother I have so I don't have much of a choice even if right now, he's an eyesore to me. "Do you remember how we shouted at the ocean to release our anger then go swimming afterwards?" I smiled at the memory. He was a good brother then. "Do you remember how we met Mika? How we saw her crying by the shore?" I felt tears welling up behind my eyes. The unwelcome memories flooding through my head uncontrollably. "She was depressed at that time, wasn't she? That was the time when her mother passed away." My voice cracked. No. I am not crying in front of him. I shouldn't let him see how weak and devastated again. The last time I did that, he had taken advantage of it and slept with my girlfriend. "That was the time when she ran away from home and got lost, right? Then out of kindness, we helped her and let her stay in our house for a month."

"Shin..." Hyung trailed off. I can feel that he was also near to crying though I don't know if it is due to the sadness of the memories I have brought up or the guilt of him taking away my first love... if he was even guilty at all.

"And that spring, she had transferred to our school. She became my classmate and it was then when I started liking her. And not soon, we started going out..." memories of Mika and me are flashing in front of me. Her smile, her laugh, everything about her before she left me felt like it just happened yesterday.

"Yah. Shin. Let's go out!" MiKa called as she ran towards me. I did not reply and just sat on the bench in the school garden. I took my guitar out of its case and started strumming. "I'll continue to love her, even if if it hurts me. I'll continue to stay beside her, even if it crushes me. I am going to love her. Because I'm a fool." I sang, letting all my emotions run through the soul of the song.

As I played the last note, I felt her sit beside me. "What was that about?" She smiled, her eyes mirroring pure innocence and curiosity.

"Well, it's a song I like. It reminds me of my feelings for a girl who can't like me back." I sighed, hoping she gets my hint.

"Yah. Who couldn't like you? You're a gentleman and you're too handsome to be unnoticed!" She smacked my shoulder playfully.

"Apparently, it's the girl I like who couldn't" I forced a smile. So, she didn't get it.

Mika smiled then put an arm around my shoulders. "Well, if she's that blind, it's not your loss. She's now losing one of the most handsome and kind men in the world to me, Jung Mika."

"What are you talking about?" I gave her a quizzical look.

"Ah, Shin..." She blushed. why was she blushing in front of me? "Let's grab some ice cream, shall we?" She stood up then started to walk away. I had to smile to myself. Mika likes me too and, she just confessed to me! "Yah. Are you coming or not?" She looked back, her once blushed cheeks have now returned to their normal color.

Suppressing a laugh, I stood up and followed her to our favorite ice cream parlor with my heart filled with hidden glee.

But those were the happy moments when we were still together. I had to snap out of my thoughts. Mika has a daughter now and worse, she had become my brother's wife. "She's still as lovely as before, isn't she?" I faked a chuckle. "Her beauty didn't fade - even if she already gave birth to your daughter." I couldn't hide my bitterness now. Hey, I should be called a saint by now for not beheading my brother five minutes ago.

"Shin. It's not what you think..." My brother started.

"What else is there to misunderstand? I could see that you are already married with a three-year-old daughter!" I didn't mean to reaise my voice but I guess the feelings that have welled up inside me had affected my moral thinking.

"Listen to me." His voice was stern.

"Do I still have to know something else? Yah. Do you know how much it hurt me when she left? Do you even have the slightest idea how much it killed the happy Shinwoo in me?" I didn't even bother to use formalities anymore. It has been long since I had my last outburst. I couldn't even remember when that happened. "Have you even loved someone to the extent of being angered by it? No. You haven't. You're the one who was always getting the attention that you wanted. " I started to sob. This isn't really like me to be crying like this. I tried to stop the tears but they have just flowed out of y eyes more. "Don't even think of comforting me. You'll just worsen my situation." I stood up and started to leave.

"I know it was wrong to take her away from you. " I stopped walking. Hyung's voice was cold and harsh. "Yes, she was pregnant when she left you. She did not want to abort Kara. I kept our child. I tried telling you before but I did not want to ruin your career." He had already stood up from where he was sitting. His fists were clenched on either side of his body.

"Did you know that I was even scared of kissing her on the cheek? I was that careful of her. But what did you do? You took her to bed when she was still dating me! What kind of brother are you?" With that, I stormed off to my room, not caring if the other members of my family woke up with the heated conversation the two of us had.