Confessions

The Wolf I've Become: The Unwanted

NOTE: THE GIRLS ARE COMING BACK IN JUNE!!! OMFG!!!

LOL okay, continue with the story xD

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HHG University
Calculus Class

The next morning, Calculus greeted us with a very 'pleasing' task first thing in the morning---pop quiz. Ugh. Right when I’ve just recovered from the high I had last night, here goes the morning routine of nothing but a bunch of numbers and x’s. Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE Math. It’s just that, I wasn’t in the mood.

I rested my chin on my palm right when Yuri flopped her bum on the table next to me, and in front was Yoona.

“So, how did your night go?” My tan-skinned best friend asked while wriggling her eyebrows. And I slapped her across the face right in that moment. “Ow! Is that how you greet your best friend?” She exclaimed dramatically while she held her left cheek. I was about to slap her again but Yoona beat me to it by flicking her forehead this time. We both laughed.

Yuri playfully scoffed. “And I can’t even believe I’m friends with you guys.”

“Don’t worry, the feeling’s mutual.” I retort. And I think everything became a blur at that point. Because Tiffany just came into the room with her usual allure that always sends me right off the edge. Okay. I must admit. I am whipped. I’m whipped by Tiffany Jung’s fascinating charms and of course, beauty. She’s drop-dead gorgeous, I must say.

And I was so lost in my own little world that contains nothing but Tiffany that I barely noticed Yuri’s hand closing my slightly agape mouth. I didn’t even noticed my mouth was actually hung open.

My two best friends were trying to hold in their laughter. Great. They’re going to make fun of me again.

“Your saliva’s flowing down like a raging waterfall.” And that’s when they both lost it. And I lost it. I rounded my arm around Yuri’s neck and engaged her into a headlock. I pinched her nose bridge and let go when she tickled my ribs. I was about to take vengeance when Tiffany came into the scene.

She took her seat on the front row and said, “Good morning, Tae.” With an additional flirty wink.

I smiled dorkily and waved towards her direction instead of just hitting Yuri. “Good morning.” I simply said. I saw Yuri and Yoona inch a little closer to me, and said something that never failed to get on my nerves.

“WHIPPED.”

I managed to grab and pinch their ears with each of my hands before the teacher barged in and started our nine-thirty class.

Right after classes ended, the three of us head down the cafeteria first before we went straight for the music room to kill time. Next class doesn’t start until one in the afternoon, and it’s only twelve.

Yuri lazily ran her fingers over the piano keys as Yoona and I sat on top of the closed top board of the grand piano. Yuri plays a little bit of Bach’s Prelude and Fugue No. 1 before Yoona asks, “Have you done our music homework yet?” While strumming the guitar that she grabbed from the far right corner of the room---where the rest of the other types of guitars were stored.

I shake my head no. And if you may ask what was the homework this deer beside me was talking about, it’s composing or rewriting a song that you can relate to anything that you’ve experienced in your life, or about someone who inspires you at the moment. And I’ve already thought of one person.

“You know, you and Seohyun are like long lost twins.” I say out of the blue, and Yoona and Yuri both stopped playing abruptly upon my muse. Yuri spoke first. “And why the hell do you think that?” She resumed on playing. Now, she was playing Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata.

“Well, obviously because you both have the same talents. She plays the piano, you play the piano; she plays the guitar, you play the guitar; she plays the violin, you play the violin. You look alike most of the time, especially when your backs are turned. The only difference was... you’re tanned, she’s milky-white. And your height. She’s a little bit taller than you.”

Yoona pinches me from the back. When I turned to her, she was glaring at me. “Unnie, eww! It’s like you’re saying I have a crush on Yuri! Yuck! Ugh!”

“Yah yah yah! You choding! Like I’m interested in you anyways! Eww!” Yuri shots back. And I laugh at the two bickering for a moment. It’s almost entertaining.

I stoop down from the grand piano, and let them argue with each other. I closed up on the other instruments in the room. I ran my fingers slowly against the harp, and I think that caught the two’s attentions by then. I picked up a stick and tried out the xylophone afterwards.

“Hey,” Yuri calls out to me. “You haven’t told us yet what happened last night.” She said in a sing-song voice. I chuckled to myself. So, she still haven’t forgot about it. Tss. “I told you, nothing happened last night. And it’s not like that was my intention. I’m a , I admit. But that stays in the worldwide web.”

“Ows?”

“Yes. And besides... Tiffany’s not that kind of girl.”

The two howled in unison like a wolf. But what Yuri said next totally caught me off guard. “Aww Tae... you’re finally in love with her~”

Me? In love? I love her? I love Tiffany? But it’s only been two months. Is it even possible to fall in love with someone as perfect as Tiffany within that said amount of time? I don’t think---

“You are in love, Tae. Admit it.” Yuri reminds me for the second time even when the bell rang and we were heading towards our next class.

“How do you even know when you’re in love?”

Okay. I don’t care if these two would make fun of me for even asking even though I sort of knew the answer already. But I had to make sure. What if this was just some kind of puppy love, like what the elders say? But I doubt that. We weren’t in high school anymore. We’re past that age. This has to be more than that level.

Yuri was the last one who entered the room after Yoona. There were already a few students inside the room so we sat at the far end of the room for now to avoid eavesdroppers. “So?” Yuri rests her elbow atop the desk; and her head rested atop her closed fist as she looks at me.

“So, when you’re in love... you’ll feel this weird feelings blossoming inside your chest whenever you see her or whenever you’re together. You always want to see her. You always want to hear her voice. You’re happy when she’s around. And you feel down when she’s not. But most importantly, you see yourself in her. Like she’s your reflection; like a mirror. Like what Justin Timberlake’s song says.”

Yoona and I both chuckled at that swift interjection of JT into the conversation.

“What? It’s true!” Yuri insisted. And I just nodded my head to get this over with.

Then, I think back on what she said. She’s right. I am in love with Tiffany. I mean, I do feel these weird feelings inside my chest like I never felt with my past crushes. I always wanted to see her and hear her voice even though we see each other everyday. I’m more than happy when she’s around me. And I hate to admit it but, that mirror thing is right. I do see my own reflection in her. Like we were meant to be all along.

‘And it’s like fireworks exploded all around us when we accidentally kissed the other day.’

“Wait. What?!”

Oh my god. I think I just said that out loud. “Uhh... what what?” My two friends looked at me, frozen like they’ve just been splattered with a bucket of water and ice. “Did you just say---“ And I thank the school bell and the other students and professor Seo for cutting Yuri in mid-sentence. Fortunately, Yuri didn’t go for it since the class had reports going on and I guess she didn’t have time.

But of course, when classes ended, she started bombarding me with questions again. “Yah! Don’t you dare walk away from me, Kim Taeyeon. You’ve got some major major explaining to do, you dork!” I ignored Yuri’s ministrations behind me as  I brisk walked through the hallways and into the elevators. Yuri and Yoona entered the machine after a while. And Yuri was panting hard.

“Which floor ma’am.” The elevator boy asks. “5th please.” I say.

The three of us (and some other students who were busy texting) remained silent only until we’ve reached our destination. We thank mister elevator boy and headed out.

“Taeyeon unnie, you can’t walk away from us forever, you know?” Yoona says; walking beside me on my right while munching an apple she bought from earlier. Yuri was on my left, and had her arm locked securely around my shoulders. I sighed. “Okay. What do you want to know?” “What was it with you kissing Tiffany the other day??” I reflexively covered Yuri’s loud mouth with my two hands, and I kept it that way until we reached the science lab that’s third to the last on the left.

The three of us huddled on a table on the far left corner and kept the tone of our voices minimal. “Yah! Couldn’t you say it any more louder??” Yuri scoffed. “Then tell me.” I rolled my eyes. I looked to and fro at the two chodings on the either sides of me before saying, “IaccidentallykissedTiffanyonthelipstheotherday.” As fast as I could so they wouldn’t be able to catch. But... oh who am I kidding.

Yuri pinched the skin under my arm. “Why didn’t you tell us?” I shrugged my shoulders despite her continuous pinching. “What’s the deal? It was an accident. Stop pinching me!” I softly swat her hand away and massaged my arm.

“Unnie, it’s big of a deal. I mean, you like Tiffany unnie. And it’s obvious she likes you too. And you already kissed! May it be accidental or not, but still!” This time, Yoona exclaimed while still munching the apple she was holding. “That’s gotta say something.” She added.

“Like what?”

Yoona paused to think. “Did she kissed you back?”

“Well---we didn’t kissed like that, okay?! I told you, it was an accident. Why would she kiss me back?” I retorted.

“But she didn’t pull away, right?” Yuri asks me, more calm this time. I slowly shook my head as a response. I raised an eyebrow at the smirk splayed all over their lips all of a sudden. I sighed for the second time. “Of course she didn’t pull away immediately. She was shocked! We both were. But... it did took a while before she did...” I finally said, biting my nails right after. It was a gesture that somehow indicated how nervous I was.

Yuri pats me slowly on the back. “You’re so ing lucky, Kim Taeyeon.” She pulls out sheets of paper from her backpack and spread it in front of us---on the table. “I mean, no matter how close me and Sica are already. We still haven’t done that.” A chuckle at the end.

I rolled my eyes for the second time as well. Why do I have erted best friends again?

“Well, at least the two of you are in good terms with your tutors.” Yoona almost whispers. I furrowed my eyebrows, and I know Yuri did the same. “Why? You and Seohyun aren’t in good terms?” I ask her. And she only fiddled with the ends of the papers and sighed heavily. “Not exactly. I mean, we still aren’t in that level of friendship.”

“Aww Yoong... just give her some time. Maybe she’s still in the phase of getting to know you better.” Yuri says, not looking up from the stack of papers she was writing on. If you may ask, it was our Chem report that’s most probably due tomorrow.

Yuri reaches out from the corner of the table on her left and grabs a volumetric flask that contains a blue liquid substance and hands it to me. “You’re the only one who hasn’t written an observation and a conclusion.” Oh. “Oh.” I said. Then, I started working on the task at hand.

The three of us decided to go home at exactly five in the afternoon.

During dinner, we had baked salmon, mashed potatoes, beet salad, and mixed fruits. We settled down on the sofa in the living room after finishing that 1.5 litre of rocky road ice cream that had been laying there, inside the freezer---untouched, for quite some time now.

I was laying straight on the couch, Yuri sat by my foot---her back slid down low enough that her almost went off the edge. Yoona was sitting on the carpeted floor---the remote in her hands. She was flipping the channels for a long while until it settled in FOX. The third season of ‘The Walking Dead’ was playing on the screen.

“ing governor.” Both Yoona and Yuri muttered at the same time. And within that split second where Ricky and the gang seemingly crashed the governor’s community, my phone vibrated violently atop the coffee table, and Yoona grabbed it mindlessly and handed it to me without tearing her eyes off the screen. I grabbed my phone in my possession and stared at the screen for a while.

Incoming Call
Tippani~ <3

Without having second thoughts, I abruptly stood (and almost jumped) on the sofa, which made Yoona and Yuri look back at me weirdly. I just gave them an innocent smile and jumped over to the other side. I swiped the green button and headed upstairs.

“Hey~” I greeted her as soon as I closed the glass door behind me, and leaned against the railings of the balcony. It was a good thing I’m wearing my cotton sweatshirt tonight or else, I would’ve been chilling by now due to the cold raging wind. I heard a soft click from Tiffany’s side, and then, I finally heard her sweet voice. “Hi~ I didn’t wake you up, did I?” Her soft giggle (that sounded almost like door chimes) came after. I shook my head, as if she could see me.

“No. Not at all. I was still watching tv downstairs with Yuri and Yoona when you called.” I stated honestly, and I can’t prevent my idiotic grin from going any wider with each second. “That’s good. I guess? I mean, I was bored. The girls are watching some movie in the living room too, and I must say, I’m not a fan of the movie.” She giggled to herself again.

At this rate, I decided to sit down and stare up at the stars, because I’m sure, this is gonna be a long talk so...

“What are they watching?” I asked. I hear a soft shuffle of what I’m guessing as her bed linens before she answers my question. “G.I. Joe Retaliation.” “You don’t like action?” She chuckles this time. “Not really. I mean, I watch some action movies. But Channing dies at the beginning of this second installment, and I’m a fan of Channing Tatum.”

Seriously though, she has distinct taste in people. AND she’s such a fangirl. All these times, I’ve never met a fangirl that could get anymore worse than Yoona. It’s pretty... amusing. “Oh so Channing is on your list of heartthrobs and celebrity crushes too?” I almost laughed to myself. And after a while, she copies me. Aside from her singing voice (and just her voice, in general) her laughter sounds like melodic music to me as well. I could listen to it all day if I’m given the chance.

“Yes. Yes, he is. But he’s like in the fourth place or something. Because the top three spots belongs to Ian, Taylor, and Lee Minho.”

A few days back, before we’ve gotten this close, I wouldn’t have even thought she has this cute, sweet side of her where she screams and swoons over tv personalities. But that added to the reasons why I like her.

“Poor Lee Minho. He’s the only Korean national on your list.”

Tiffany laughs again. And I could totally picture her winning eye-smile that had probably won over my heart. “No, he isn’t. There’s Rain, Kwon Sang Woo, Lee Dong Wook, and some other guys. Haha!”

I swear I was this close to regretting what I was going to say, but my heart and mind is so stubborn I can’t even think straight. “Can I be on your list?”

As I expected, Tiffany's laughter slowly died down, and awkward silence filled our atmosphere next. Now, my cheeks started to get warm despite the cold weather.

My heart stopped beating when Tiffany finally spoke and said, “You’re not a celebrity.” In a low, almost whisper tone of voice so she sounded like a shy girl at school talking to her crush. “No. I’m not. But didn’t you say I’m like a heartthrob? Because I make your heart race?” I bit my lower lip; hard enough, so the stupid grin plastered on my face won’t be able to reach my nape.

It took a few seconds before Tiffany came up with an ‘excuse’.

“I hate you! I didn’t meant it like that!” She said in an almost whiny voice.

“In what way did you meant it then?”

Tiffany sighed from the other line. “I only said that because lately I noticed that a lot of people in the campus actually turns their heads the moment you walk pass them. It’s like, you’re a celeb or something. And I’ve been hearing some things about you from other people too.”

“Things? Like what?”

“Like... how you’re so perfect. Like, how you’re so beautiful from head to toe; how your smile lights up the world. Like how your chin dimple is so cute and like how you look so hot answering math problems. Oh I don’t know! Stuffs like that! And some other inappropriate... things!” She exclaimed. And this is where my evident teasing returns.

“Why do you sound like you’re irritated? Are you jealous?”

“YAH! I’M NOT! SHUT UP TAENG!”

By this point of the conversation, my grin is replaced with a mischievous smirk. “Then, why are you being defensive?” I hear her cuss in the air. I’m sure she was probably ruffling her long beautiful locks because of annoyance or embarrassment by now. But I’d go for embarrassment.

“Goddammit, Taeyeon! I’m not being defensive!” She yelled once again. And this is like the many times I have fun teasing her. “You’re jealous.”

“NO!”

“Yes.”

“No!”

“Yes.”

“ it I said I’m not!”

I let out my infamous ahjumma laugh.

“You’re blushing madly right now, aren’t you?”

“Yes---no! I’m not! Stop making fun of me!” I laughed again. But of course, I didn’t failed to notice that tiny word-slip from . “Then, why are you jealous?”

Tiffany groaned from the other side, and I can totally imagine her thrashing around her bed while she continues to ruffle her hair in a mess. “I told you, I’m not jealous!” Denial. “I just... I don’t like hearing things about you from other people, and the way the guys stare at you like some kind of dirty old erts wanting to get inside your pants.”

I felt my heart pound against my chest again the moment Tiffany said what she just said. For a moment I debated with myself if I should just go end the conversation like nothing happened (like what I’m always good at) and just ignore these bottled up feelings inside of me wanting to come out, or if I should stay here and wait for Tiffany to say the things I wanted to hear from her.

“Why don’t you like them?”

My heart sunk with Tiffany’s respsonse.

“Because you’re my friend.”

Why did I ever get my hopes up?

I smiled bitterly even though she couldn’t really see it.

The two of us went into a complete silence after that. I didn’t know what to say, and I bet she was experiencing the same thing because she wasn’t hanging up. On the next few seconds, I think she wanted to say something, but quickly retracted and stayed silent again. At times like this it’s always hard to put the jumbled letters and words in order.

“Tiffany,” I say in my unusual collected tone of voice. I couldn’t comprehend why I suddenly found my voice and why am I going to do what I was going to do. Tiffany hums in response and waits for the continuation of the sentence I started with her name. “I want to tell you something...” I trailed off as I wait for her permission to go on.

“What is it?” She says carefully---almost like she was walking above coals and flames.

“Promise me first you won’t get mad at me.”

I needed the reassurance, okay?

Tiffany softly sighs, and I can picture her nodding her head. “Sure. I won’t get mad at you. Whatever it is, I won’t. I promise you.”

I stood from my place; as if sitting down with my legs crossed suddenly became so tiring. I pace the balcony back and forth with slow, steady steps as I take a deep breath---the night’s breeze and a neighbor’s citrus tree’s fragrance getting clogged up on my nostrils. I halted my steps right in the middle.

This is it, I thought. It was now or never.

“Tiffany, I...” I in the last of air I could ever take in. “Ever since I met you, I’m... I admit, I was awestricken. I-I didn’t even know what to do when I found out you were in the same class with me. I-I don’t know what happened to me, but I know that at that moment, I was already experiencing something that encompasses admiration. I know. It’s weird. We just met, but I’m already having these... feelings for you.”

I paused to take a breath.

“The very first time you talked to me, I almost fainted.” I chuckled to myself for a moment. And in that same second, I hear Tiffany let out a soft chuckle too.

‘Come on, Taeyeon. You’re halfway there.’

“And everytime you look at me; stare at me even, I don’t know... I just... I seem like a vanilla ice cream on a cone that melts the longer you keep those tantalizing eyes on me. And when I asked you if we were friends, and you said yes, I was beyond happy at that time. Because I know if you didn’t feel the same way, at least I’d have our friendship to hold on to.”

“Tae...”

“I know two months and a half isn’t enough to develop feelings for someone, but it’s like I was cupid’s target all along and he finally hit me with that tiny arrow that has a heart at the tip. And you were like Miley Cyrus... you came in like a wrecking ball and hit me hard.”

Tiffany squeaked a laugh after that speech, and I was confused for a moment. Was she finding this laughable or is she only finding an excuse not to get flushed ‘cause she was feeling the same way? Oh I don’t know what to think anymore.

“Tae... let’s talk about this tomorrow, okay?” Her soft voice rang inside my ear.

I sighed sadly. I knew it. I was just assuming things. Who was I for Tiffany to have feelings for anyways? There are a lot of people out there who actually has a chance with her. People like Sunny.

I forced a smile. “You know... you can tell me. I won’t be hurt. I promise. Just tell me if you feel the same way about me or not. Because I’ll go crazy.”

Tiffany’s side went silent. Did she hung up on me? No. She wouldn’t do that to me.

 

 

 

“Did I say I didn’t feel the same way? I just said let’s talk about this tomorrow. It’s not really comfortable for me to say everything in just a phone call.” I almost dropped my iPhone to the ground. Did I hear right?

“Goodnight, Taetae~”

Totally dumbfounded and completely having no choice, I nodded my head as I let out a sigh in the process. “Okay. Goodnight.” She hummed at my response and muttered a simple “See you tomorrow” before completely hanging up. The dial tone soon filled my ears. I kept the phone by my ear as if expecting for her to call back. But no, I’m just too shocked.

What exactly does she mean by that? Does she actually feel the same way? I mean, she didn’t seem like she rejected me and all... so maybe that means...

“Tae, Tiffany ain’t gonna call back no matter how long you stare at your phone.” I almost convulsed at Yuri’s voice from behind me. Then I realized, I was indeed staring at my phone mindlessly. Really, Tiffany’s effect on me is no joke.

“Yah... how long have you been standing there?”

Yul crossed her arms by her chest and leaned sideways against the wall. She let out a smug smirk. “Long enough.” She says. And it’s only when I noticed that she was already in her Mickey Mouse pyjamas and was ready to go to bed. Yoona, on the other hand, was already in bed, dreaming about Edward Cullen or Seohyun for all I know. How long have I been on the phone with Tiffany?

Before I even got the chance to open my mouth and say something, Yuri turned her torso and started walking away, but without forgetting to say, “Sleep, Taeng. You’ll see her tomorrow.” And without having second thoughts, I went back inside the house and dashed towards her after closing the door. She stumbled forward right when I launched myself onto her back.

We were both laughing our butts out even when we reached our rooms.

I'm bracing myself for tomorrow.

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NOTE: I hope this chappie's alright :)

Thank you always for all of your support, guys---the subs, comments, and upvotes, thank you! :D

So, untill my next update yeah? xD I'll see you guys soon~

PS. Better brace yourselves for the next chap coz something wicked that way comes...

Ciao~

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Comments

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SamKairi
#1
Chapter 11: Dude, i know you live them 'boys' (u know who i mean :P) but seriously? Hahaha gotta respect XD

looks like you did finish this before 22 hahaha, good luck for classes!!

*More Support from a Reader XD
Taeganger_29
#2
Chapter 11: uh, 1D? that was unexpected. hahaa. waiting for the sequel. ^^
Swaggy_yeon15
#3
Chapter 11: omaigawd! more more! i'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo crazy for taeny mahahahaha *squealing like mad*
Damasco
#4
Chapter 11: Yay sequel! Not really a fan of 1D but hey, SNSD!! XD
hamcheese #5
Chapter 10: I didn't catch up this chapter, and I didn't see when tiffany gave Tae her last word ..or may be im poor at Eng
tipco09 #6
Chapter 10: TaeNy should be the ending chapter.
Taeganger_29
#7
Chapter 10: um, was kind of lost & confused with all these fast time skip story(?) lol. need taeny moment in final chapter. :)
Julie_luniie
#8
Chapter 9: Damn! Even if the story relates to Twilight a bit , it was still so good!!!! <3

Upfate!! ;)
Jmylimerence #9
Chapter 1: SOOO GOOOD OMG. THIS IS GOOD.