It was after that encounter that I got sleepless nights and more distractions all day. I know, it isn’t a big deal to anyone but not to me. For me, it’s a big deal. Well, because Tiffany rarely talks to anyone outside her group of friends and it’s odd that she actually talks to me even if single or two worded sentences doesn’t really serves as an actual conversation. But still...

And I know I should be anxious and a little bit depressed because my grades in English Communications and Speech are dropping to a B minus; much worse: C, but I don’t seem to care. I don’t know why. Normally I’d make a fuss about it, but I guess not today. Tiffany’s all over my head that I couldn’t think straight for the past few days. And that led me here. In tutoring classes.

“So...” I tried to start yet a conversation since this was my chance to actually talk to her and hopefully get know her so I go for it. But right when I opened my mouth she sat beside me and started flipping the pages of the book she was holding. I felt my heart race. She was so close to me that our shoulders are almost touching. For the past month, Tiffany had never been this close to me yet. And honestly, I don’t know what to do.

“We don’t need introductions since we go to the same class anyways and I know you and you know me, so it isn’t necessary to go that direction.”

Tiffany spoke so fast I couldn’t quite comprehend what she said but I nodded anyways.

She settled her book down on the table, in front of her, while she handed me a Korean-English dictionary. She looked at me, and I looked at her, and for a second, I think her eyes glowed a golden colour. Or maybe it was just because of the sunrays. Oh I don’t know. She’s still beautiful either way.

“Which part are you struggling with?” She asked me carefully. And I don’t know what came into me when I said “All of it?” And I don’t know if my ears were hearing right but I think I just heard Tiffany giggle. I chuckled lowly to myself. At least I’m making her laugh, right?

Her expression went to their usual blankness when we started the lesson. We didn’t talk much unless I had some questions (to which were actually a whole aching LOT) But anything out of topic? None. It almost feels like that slight giggle from her didn’t even exist. I could compare her with Yuri. They’re both good at making these facades.

“What does ‘compelling’ mean?”

Tiffany looked over my shoulder and I know I shouldn’t panic but I seriously am. Because her vanilla scented shampoo and her rose scented perfume were clogging up my nose and I feel dizzy; intoxicated.

“Evoking interest, attention, or admiration in an irresistible way.”

I almost jumped on my seat when she looked back at me. “O-Okay. Thanks.” I resumed on answering the sheets she gave me as I tried to wave off her intense gaze. Seriously though, she’s had a plentiful habits.

The lesson lasted for about two hours and we finished at exactly six o’clock in the evening. For the first time I’m satisfied with today. Because one: I talked to Tiffany for those full hours. Even if it was just for school, who cares? Two: the many times I hear her lightly laugh or chuckle whenever I say or do something funny enough like when I sang Barney’s theme song out of the blue and Tiffany keeping her poker face in check and trying her best not to laugh. And three: I accidentally held her hand. Her pen almost fell and we both tried to grab it at the same time.

“Your hands are cold.” Is what I told her then. And she just waved me off and retracted her hand.

By the time we leave the room she turns to me and warns me one last time.

“Don’t tell anyone about my number. You’re the only one, aside from my friends, that knows. I don’t usually give people my contacts. But this is about school, so you’re an exemption to that. So if a stranger texts me in the middle of the night, you’re the only one I could blame.”

Her voice wasn’t clipped; not angry either. But it held that certain conviction that makes me keep my promise.

“I won’t tell. I promise.”

She nodded once and headed towards the hallway that lead to the school’s parking lot. I looked down at my phone and named the number that was showing on the screen. I smiled at the name I input.

Tippani~ <3

The following weeks were done just the same. Me and her meeting in a vacated classroom every Wednesday became a routine. And it will continue on until we finish first semester.

I hurriedly closed my locker and secured my backpack on my shoulders.

“I think you’re spending too much time with Tiffany.” Yoona tells me as she and Yuri walks side by side with me. I playfully rolled my eyes at the comment. “I should say the same thing about you and Seohyun.” I retorted. And as what I expected, her face started to redden as she averts her gaze on the floor. I patted maknae’s shoulder the same time Yuri scoffs on my other side. “Yeah right. You adding another hour to the tutoring program is getting frequent. Sure, you’re not spending too much time with Tiffany.”

“Yah. It’s not my fault English is so hard.”

It’s true. English IS hard. At least for me. But that didn’t quite explain the extra time we take up for the program, I know. Okay. Maybe they were right. Maybe I am spending too much time with Tiffany. But trust me, it wasn’t all my idea.

The three of us had gone separate ways---I headed the third floor, while Yoona and Yuri went down to the cafeteria, as usual. Several people greeted me as I closed up on the room Tiffany chose, and I greeted them back. I burst open the rear entrance and found the room completely empty. I settled myself by the table in the middle and detached my bag and Yuri’s guitar from my shoulders.

I was plucking the guitar strings in a familiar tune and started singing. I was halfway through the song my mom taught me, when the door opened and Jieun (or she refers to be called ‘IU’ since she said she wanted to become a singer one day) swiftly enters the room. “Hi unnie.” She greeted.

I smiled my normal smile and greeted her the same.

“What brings you here?”

IU went to her table and grabbed a thin looking book. “Just went for this.” She says, raising the material in her hand. I nodded in acknowledgement. She closed up to me while flipping her book. “What about you unnie? I mean, why are you alone here?”

By this time, I stopped strumming the guitar. “I’m waiting for Tiffany.” I said. “Have you seen her around?”

“I think I saw her in the cafeteria with Sunny unnie.” Oh.

“Hey guys!”

I was a bit startled when the door burst open; revealing two familiar figures. And I watched with my mouth hung open as IU runs towards the figures like a kid excited to greet her parents after going to summer camp. And for the first time, I saw Tiffany’s eyes disappear into crescents, and Sunny’s almost doing the same. I saw Tiffany smile before. But it was always a quick and light one; unlike what she was doing now.

“You know each other?”

The three of them turn to my direction all at the same time. Sure, IU goes to the same classes as we do, but she only take up four that’s parallel with ours. I need an explanation why they seemed so close.

Sunny opens to respond to my question. “Yes. Something wrong, Tae?”

I ignored Sunny’s answer and turned to IU. “Why didn’t you tell me?” IU shrugged and chuckled. “You didn’t ask.” She says to me; almost laughing---maybe at my expression or how my question sounded stupid. I didn’t get to say much further because she already bid goodbye and went to her next class.

“I guess I’ll be out too.” I heard Sunny say and that broke me from my almost detachment from the real world.

It’s been so long since the last time I felt envious over someone, and I think it’s making a comeback. Because when Sunny and Tiffany smiled at each other all too sweet, and Sunny caressed Tiffany’s abdomen, my heart ached in some parts. Somehow, I wished I was in Sunny’s position right now.

“Don’t stare at my stomach like that. You look like a ert.” In an instant, Tiffany’s expression fell into a serious one; not so much though.

“Have you done our English homework already?” Came her follow-up question as she pulls the chair from under the table I was sitting at and sat there. She pulled a thick book from her bag. I stared at her for a few good seconds before I leaned Yuri’s guitar gently beside the table. I rummaged through my own bag. “Here.” I handed her two stapled white sheets of paper.

Tiffany accepted the papers in her hands and examined my work carefully.

I shamelessly stared at her again. I only realized today that she has two small moles: the first one’s just above her jawline, and the other was on the side of her chin. Almost similar to mine but on the opposite side. And did I ever mentioned how the mole on her neck makes her look so agonizingly beautiful and y?

Well, she IS beautiful. And I’m not saying this because I’m a , but her curves really are in the right places.

“Tae, you need to work more on your grammar.” I stared at her, frozen. My hand halfway reaching the sheet of paper she was holding out. She was doing the same. We sat there for about two minutes, staring at each other, waiting on who’s going to break the ice first.

Tiffany just called me with my nickname and I am not okay.

She was the first one to look away from that mini-staring contest and stammered, “I’m sorry. T-That was too familiar of me.” I grabbed the paper in my hands and stared at her confusingly. Is she... blushing?

“No... No. It’s okay. Y-You can call me Tae or Taengoo; whatever you desire. I don’t mind. N-Not really. Hehe...” I tried to make the atmosphere around us a little better before my nickname slipped from . I hope it worked.

To my disappointment, we haven’t talked much ever since. All she gave me was a nod or a shake of her head or a single worded answer all throughout. And I don’t know where my courage came from when I stopped her from walking away when we left the room.

“Fany-ah...”

Woops.

With a shaking heart about to fall off my chest, I saw Tiffany halt her steps and slowly turned to look at me. She wasn’t angry or anything because I called her the name people close to her calls her with. Rather, she had a calm expression as she waited for me to say something more.

I squeezed the words up my throat.

“Are we---we’re friends... aren’t we?”

I wasn’t hoping too much she’d say yes, but I didn’t want to hear the word ‘no’ either. Because if the girl I like wasn’t even liking me back, then at least I’d wanted to construct friendship between us.

Tiffany nods. “Yes. Yes, we are.”

I bit my lower lip to supress the biggest ty grin I know I would’ve muster as I watch her walk away from me. I literally leaped in joy. It was a good thing most students finally went home or are in their last class of the day, so they wouldn’t see some crazy girl dancing and smiling to herself in the middle of the hallway.

I couldn’t ask for more than be a little bit closer to Tiffany Jung.

It was after our preliminary exams week when Tiffany started loosening up a bit and started trusting me (I think) because lately, she’d been always sitting so close to me that our shoulder blades really touch. She’s been helping me with recitations and pop quizzes too. I don’t really know but maybe it was due to my improving grades. But I doubt it’s just that. And I’m not being delusional either. Because there was one Wednesday when she asked me to have coffee.

We didn’t have classes on that certain Wednesday because it was teacher’s day. They gave us a little day off. It was that day that I sat there on a banquette while waiting for her to arrive.

The coffee shop that she chose was just a couple of blocks from the university and was two streets away from the national library. Tiffany told me she would just pass by the library first before she heads here. So I wait. And I don’t know why but my heart’s racing against my chest. I’ve never met someone outside the campus. Even when my former crush asked to meet, we met on the school’s rooftop garden.

Technically speaking, this was the first time someone asked me out. Though, I know the purpose was pure educational, but still.

I diverted my gaze from the view outside---it was a normal day for most people so they were walking back and forth along the pavement, across the street; people coming in and out of the coffee shop from time to time, and cars pass by and stop due to the traffic light just ahead. It was a beautiful sunny day, and I’m glad it was.

My phone buzzed atop the table, almost sending if off the edge if not for my fast reflexes. I swiped the screen and saw one message.

From: Tippani~ <3

On my way there.

It was just a simple message, but my heart skipped a beat. My thumb hovered over the screen for about a minute; smiling like a lovesick fool, before I managed an appropriate response. I hurriedly typed, “Okay. I’m here at the far back, near the stairs” and looked back outside to spot for her. I almost stood when I did.

The bell nailed on the cafe’s door rang lightly upon opening. Tiffany emerged from my view and greeted the two cashiers with the same eye-smile I rarely even see. At first instance, I didn’t knew why she’d chose KARA cafe when there’s Starbucks on the other side, and Seattle’s Best on the corner of the street. Then later, I figured out why.

She was close with the owners, which explains how she’s laughing now with them.

Sometimes I wonder if I’m not the only one who sees her like this---carefree, joyous, dorky; and not her usual cold and strong aura that she displays inside the campus.

Tiffany caught sight of me and immediately excused herself from her friends. She was still smiling, but not the one she just had where her eyes disappeared and her gums showed. A girl was tailing her from behind.

“Oh, so Fany unnie was the one you were waiting for?” The same girl (whom I’ve learned to be named Hara---as what her name tag says) directed at me just when Tiffany pulled the chair across from mine and sat down. I smiled at Hara and nodded. “Yeah.” Was all I could say. And Hara seems amused. She averts her attention to Tiffany.

“Wow. It’s the first time you brought someone here that is not Sunny unnie.” My ears perked up at the familiar name. Sunny? She and Tiffany often goes here? Then, Sunny knows them too? Okay. I definitely didn’t see that coming.

Tiffany playfully hits Hara lightly on the waist the same time Hara brings out a small notepad. “So, what can I get you two?” “The usual.” Tiffany tells her with an added wink. My mouth quirked up on the sides upon the gesture. “I’ll get a mocha frapp.” I said to Hara. She writes it down, and turns back to me. She smiles and stretches out a lone hand.

“It was nice meeting you...”

I accepted her hand and shook it. “Taeyeon.”

Hara nods. “Taeyeon unnie.” She smiles again and finally walks away.

Tiffany finally looks at me and points her thumb behind her, where Hara was now standing behind the cash register. “I apologize for that kid’s fondness. She’s normally like that.” She tells me, and I couldn’t help but smile.

The date tutoring lesson gone off for about two and a half hours. And it would’ve gone longer than that if she didn’t fought her cute stuttering and accidental swerving of the conversation’s direction. For a moment, I think our tables were suddenly turned. Because everytime we meet out gazes, she was the one who looks away first when it was supposed to be me. And for the past hour, I’ve been noticing her uncomfortably shifting on her seat whenever I unintentionally touch her hand. You know, in normal situations, it REALLY would’ve been me.

“Are you... alright?”

I lightly nudge her arm, and she sends me a quick smile. “Yeah,” She told me. “I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. I’m just a little bit clumsy today.” She explained. But that didn’t keep my mind from thinking about what Yuri had said to me from about a week ago.

‘She likes you.’

It kept going on and on and on...

“You sure?” I asked her. She took a last sip from her coffee and nodded her head. I regretted what I said next as soon as it slipped from my mouth. “Whatever you say, Fany-ah.” I tensed almost immediately, and I feel her stiffened too. Lately, I’ve been getting more and more fond of her nickname like we’re already that close. And it frightens me. What if Tiffany didn’t like other people calling her that?

“I’m sorry. I mean, Tiffany---“

“It’s okay. You can call me Fany, if that makes you comfortable.” At this rate, my mouth fell agape. I’ve never expected her to let me call her that name. She seemed like the type to keep that to her friends, and we weren’t even that close yet.

Tiffany’s husky voice interrupted the train of thoughts in my head again. “What are you thinking?” She asks me. And I don’t exactly know how should I respond to that. I just shrugged my shoulders and sipped all the contents from the plastic cup I was holding. I looked back at her to only catch her looking at me expectantly. I gulped.

“Nothing. It’s just...” I slowly shook my head and continued, “What’s it like to like someone?” Where the bluntness came from, that I don’t know. I just know I had to say it; it needed to be said.

Tiffany blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. Four, five times, before she looked away. It took several awkward fiddling of a pen. The unnecessary flipping of the pages of a book. And a constant blank stare at a pair of hands before the two of us decided it was time to go home. We gathered our things and bid goodbye to Hara and the other four girls whom I hadn’t known yet.

Tiffany still haven’t answered my question. Not that I actually demand one but... I just wanted to know what her thoughts are.

We were crossing the street to get to the parking lot on the other side of the road and the park, when I decided the time I’ve given her had expired. “You haven’t answered my question.” I carefully tell her. She was halfway through opening the driver’s side door of her Volvo when she turned back to me and my phone rang in my jeans pocket.

I cursed in the air.

“Please unnie~” Yoona whined on the other line. I huffed and rolled my eyes. If Yoona wasn’t my dongsaeng, she would’ve been dead by now. “Fine fine!” I exclaimed and ended the call, couldn’t take her relentless aegyo any longer.

“Is everything okay?” Tiffany asks; right hand still gripping on the car door handle. I in a huge amount of air and said something I wouldn’t have thought I’d say in this situation.

“Wanna go grab some ice cream?”

After that question, the last thing I remember I heard from Tiffany was a soft giggle. It almost sounded like sleigh bells ringing in my ears. We walked all the way from the park to a gelato shop four blocks away since she insisted. The cold crisp air blew on our skins as we walked side by side. I offered my denim jacket. Tiffany genuinely waved me off with a slight smile on her lips. I hesitantly put back on my jacket.

Morelli’s Gelato shop was jam-packed by the time we arrived. We immediately slipped ourselves into the line as we eyed the menu above head. “What would you like?” “Huh?” Tiffany turned to me, confused. “I thought you were going to buy for Yoona and Yuri?” I flashed a toothy grin. “Yeah but... it would be my pleasure to buy you one too.” Tiffany looked away with a smile on her face. Who knew this day would actually come?

“Suit yourself.”

For Yuri, I bought her all-time favourite---Caramel Nut Sundae, to which she never gets tired of. Yoona asked for a Hot Chocolate Fudge Sundae, which was apparently her current favourite. She dropped the Berry Pavlova for a while. And as for Tiffany, I bought her a Strawberry Sundae, to which didn’t surprised me. I know how much she likes the colour pink so...

We were walking back to the parking lot and it was already six in the evening. The night sky faded into dark blue, and the streetlights and the cars' headlights were already glowing bright---lighting up the whole city. I tried to engage another conversation. “So you like pink?” I asked the obvious. Tiffany shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t like it. I love it.” And that light laugh follows again.

I chuckled.

“I figured.”

“How?”

We both stopped in front of her white Volvo C30. We faced each other, and Tiffany’s face seemed to glow, her hair being blown by the air. For a second, I lost myself and stared at her in awe. I’ve never really encountered anyone that’s as beautiful as her.

“Well... your pencil case is pink. Your IPhone case is pink. You have a headband that is pink. Your portfolio folder is pink. You just bought a gelato that’s colour pink. I can go on and on with your pink coloured possessions, but this could take a whole day.” I joked, and her reaction almost stunned me. She just slapped my arm. And let out a hearty laugh I’ve never witnessed (until now) ever since we’ve met. “I’m surprised your car isn’t pink.” I unleashed my ahjumma laugh, which was a rare case since the only ones who ever hears that were Yuri and Yoona.

“The pink one was unavailable that time.”

“Seriously??” I laughed again.

Tiffany slapped my arm for the second time. “Stop it. You’re killing me.” She placed a lone hand on to prevent herself from laughing more.

“Okay okay. I’m stopping.” I raised my hands, as if to surrender. My laughter slowly subsided when I notice that Tiffany was looking at me, almost dreamily.

“Thank you.” She says to me.

“I told you, it’s nothing.” With that said, she giggles one more time. “Not for the gelato.” I sure my face had shown both confusion and surprise because Tiffany lets out her infamous eye-smile. How many times have I said she was beautiful again?

“For being my friend.” Oh. That. “Aside from my pink obsessions, I’m sure you’ve noticed also that I don’t laugh nor smile very often with someone that is not my sisters or Sunny. It’s almost like I’m close to being the Addam’s Family’s very close relative.” I squeaked a tiny laugh from within my throat. “You’re the first person who’ve ever made me smile like I did today. So... thank you. It means a lot to me more than you think.”

I rubbed the nape of my neck.

Tiffany just thanked me for being her friend and for making her smile. Could this day get any better? What do I do now? I feel so shy again.

I debated with my complicated brain about what to do next until I felt Tiffany’s cold fingers wrap around my thin wrist. The next thing she did shocked me more than I ever had and if she wasn’t holding me, I would’ve fainted. My eyes almost automatically fluttered close the moment those soft pair of lips landed against my left cheek. It lingered for a little longer there (or so I assumed it did) before Tiffany pulled away. I opened my eyes and saw her pinkish cheeks. I felt my own get warm.

I was about to say something when she beat me to it; completely cutting me off.

“I’ll... see you tomorrow.”

I remained frozen on my spot, mouth left open even when she entered her car and ignited the engine. That’s when I moved away and only managed a waving hand. Her car sped off, and when I was sure she was out of view, I burst into a wide smile that almost wrapped around my neck. I couldn’t decipher what just happened and why. But I know, I wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight.

“Tae? Where the heck are you? Does buying an ice cream take a century?”

My smile didn’t waver even when Yuri was throwing me senseless nagging on the other line. I decided to call her first before I head home. I put the plastic bag of (melted) gelato on the passenger seat and started the engine. I plugged the bluetooth on my ear and drove off.

“Yul... you won’t believe what just happened.”

---

NOTE: Teka lang. Kinikilig ako okay?!? (Give me a minute. I feel giddy okay?!?)

So... how was it? Is it good? No? Yes? Tell me so I know :)

Okay anyways, additional note(s): That time when Taeyeon asked "What's it like to like someone" to Tiff, was the very same day Tiffany asked Jessica a similar question (ref. to The Unwanted Chapter 31: Time Machine)

So since I'll be busy this week, I decided to update. I'll try to add another chappie maybe on Saturday? Sunday? Whichever, as long as I'm free hehehe

Thank you guys for the unending support~! I'll see you guys soon ^^