AU // “The best thing about tonight’s that we’re not fighting.” -- What happens when love simply begins to die down? What will it take for it to be rekindled?

----

Ten years of marriage, ten years made up of countless arguments, heated kisses, meaningless "I hate you's", and infinite moments of love-making -- and suddenly there's nothing. No emotion, nada.

It had always been Yunho's dream to start a family, something he could call his own; but he sacrificed that dream when he fell in love with Changmin. He knew Changmin couldn't offer him what he wanted, regardless, Yunho married the young lad. Changmin was his soul mate -- you know that love depicted in fairy tales, and stories? A love that lasts forever and ever? The one you only experience once? That's what Yunho felt. It was priceless. Butterflies every morning, and kisses every night.

Yunho was irrevocably lost in love -- he still is, things were simply heading in the wrong direction now.

Yunho woke up and caught a glance of the empty space next to him. It was Changmin's spot, but for the last six months they each slept in separate rooms. They didn't cohabitate, and when they did, it felt like two random, drunk, strangers ing their sorrows away.

Yunho blamed Changmin for their child-less lives. He would tell him everyday, and Changmin was getting tired of being accused of something, that by nature, wasn't his fault.

"Aren't I better than a couple of kids Yunho? Aren't I?" Changmin threw down the spatula. They were fighting before dinner, again. Changmin couldn't contain his anger anymore. He had done everything possible to garner more of Yunho's love, but the older man was being resistant, stubborn.

"You could've said no," Changmin's eyes widened at Yunho’s mediocre response. Something stopped inside him. His heart skipped a beat while perspiration decorated his forehead. He was tired of fighting, tired of arguing over the same thing. Changmin didn’t mind a family -- it was true that he wasn’t as affectionate as Yunho, but he didn’t mind; he simply wasn’t ready, especially at the moment.

“Could’ve said no?” Changmin asked in debuffed shock. Yunho was blaming their problems on him again, typical, the young lad thought. “I loved you Yunho!” he yelled, “I would’ve done anything and everything for you, you cannot blame this all on me.”

“You know what,” Yunho got up from the kitchen table and walked towards Changmin, he gazed into Changmin’s eyes. He was indifferent, nothing seemed to matter to the older man anymore. “I’m leaving. I can’t go on like this.”

“You can’t just leave me Yunho,” Changmin mumbled, almost afraid of speaking. His smooth voice was breaking, and it did move something inside Yunho, but he wasn’t going to change his mind. Not now when their problems didn’t have any sort of solutions yet.

Changmin walked up to to a leaving Yunho and wrapped his arms around the older man. The young lad placed his cheek against Yunho’s clothed back. “P-Please,” he croaked, “Don’t leave me -- not when I need you the most.” Yunho could feel the cold tears sink through the material of his shirt, there was a pending knot growing against the walls of his throat; it hurt to breathe, to even swallow and assimilate what was happening.

“I promise I’ll do anything,” Changmin cried, “I’ll go along with adopting a child, just give me some time. I need time.”

Yunho gazed south and shook his head, “I’m sorry Changdoll.”

When Changmin heard his pet name, the cute little symbol of Yunho’s affection towards him, he about lost it. His cries went from something silent to a riveting mess, a calm river to a roaring ocean. It had been weeks, maybe even months since Changmin had last heard that name slip from Yunho’s lips. He missed it. He didn’t even know, but he craved for it.

“It’s not you,” Yunho spoke softly, “It’s me.”

And with that, Yunho broke free from Changmin’s hold and left. He didn’t say goodbye, he had forgotten to give Changmin his goodnight kiss -- the older man had simply given up, and way too soon.

----

One month was odd, but their relationship was odd anyway. They could be together and the house could still feel empty at times. Yunho was calm as water and Changmin was the crackling fire. Two months was inconsiderate. Three was mostly solitude, and four was endless crying. Five meant depression and by the time the couple reached six months, it was beginning to sink in.

Nothing was going to change. Changmin had been silently hoping that Yunho wouldn’t petition for a divorce -- maybe he would, and marry a woman who could provide him with the family he wanted. Changmin prayed that day wouldn’t arrive, and so far it hadn’t. He wished it would stay that way, but time was ticking. Yunho could change his mind.

“You haven’t told him, have you?” Kyuhyun sipped the warm tea Changmin had offered to make the moment he arrived. Kyuhyun had been in love with Changmin since childhood, but he kept that secret to himself. He knew Changmin only saw him as a friend, and it hurt, but nothing hurt more than to see your loved one hurting for another. That bastard, Kyuhyun thought.  

Changmin shook his head and said, no. “What are you waiting for Min? This could save your marriage,” Kyuhyun said.

“Or make it worse.”

Kyuhyun lined his eyebrows together and set his hand to rest atop Changmin’s. “Why would that make it worse, Yunho has a responsibility towards you. That man should be here -- just like I’m here along your side.”

“I’m sick Kyuhyun -- I doubt Yunho would want to take care of me.”

“The doctors haven’t told you what type of cancer it is?” Changmin remained silent, he didn’t know, he was too afraid to ask. He was terrified of knowing that his lifespan had a deadline. He was scared of many things -- not seeing Yunho again, not kissing him, not telling him how much he truly did love him despite the hell they had been going through.

“I have an appointment Wednesday. I asked them to tell me then. I probably won’t make it,” Changmin added.

“You can’t think like that Min. There are survivors.”

“Look at me!” Changmin pointed at himself, he was close to looking like death. He was but a bundle of bones and skin. His creamy skin turned pale, almost ghostly-like. His lips had no natural moist or color to them. “How do I have a shot at surviving?”

“You just need to keep some faith.”

“I lost all that when Yunho left. I’m nothing without him.”

Kyuhyun sighed -- he was ready to go up to Yunho and beat the older man to the pulp. He could not stand watching his friend wither away into infinite depths of depression while the young lad’s husband was god know’s where. “Don’t worry too much, okay?”

Changmin nodded, what else could he do?

----

“Taeyeon!” Yunho yelled into the office phone, “I thought I told you I didn’t want any visitors.” Taeyeon could visibly see the lines forming on Yunho’s forehead. She could also visualize the way he was gritting his teeth.

“I’m sorry sir, but the man says this is a life or death matter. I didn’t know what to tell him.” Yunho sighed, he was the boss, yet it seemed that at times he didn’t have the last word in anything.

“Fine,” Yunho replied, giving up, “Let him in.” He hung up the phone and sighed; he frothed his temples and tried to think in a positive manner.

Yunho played with a pen while he waited for the supposed stranger that needed to talk to him. The door opened and Yunho turned his wheeled chair to the front in order to face the man who had abruptly threatened his perfect schedule. “Kyuhyun,” Yunho’s eyes slightly widened, but his tone remained indifferent. “What are you doing here? I don’t have time for whatever you have to say, I’m busy.”

“I can see that you pathetic prick.”

Yunho furrowed his eyebrows at the offense and stood up, his hands slamming rapidly against the glass surface of his desk. “What the hell. Get out Kyuhyun. If you came to offend me then I suggest you leave.”

“I came to tell you that you’re a pathetic prick. You’re too busy to even realize what’s going on with Changmin.”

At the mention of Changmin, Yunho relaxed his shoulders. It had been a long time since Yunho and Changmin had spoken -- six months to be concrete. Six months that he spent wallowing his problems in alcohol. Six months that he dreamt of being embraced by Changmin, but his pride wasn’t letting him. Yunho knew he had been wrong for venting out his irrationalized emotions like he had, but he simply didn’t know how to apologize.

“Changmin is fine,” Yunho replied. “I deposit a good amount of money in his account. He shouldn’t have a problem.”

“And here I thought you still had a freakin’ heart, Yunho. Changmin doesn’t need your bloody money, he needs you.”

“I don’t think I’m ready yet Kyuhyun.”

“Well you better man up Yunho, because Changmin is sick. He’s dying.”

“What?” Yunho screeched. His heart began to beat at an uncontrollable pace. His Changmin was dying? No, he thought, he cannot die. “What do you mean he’s dying? I --” Time was ticking, and if Yunho didn't budge, it'd go by pretty quick, like a flash; and every attempt would be too late by then.

“He has cancer. The doctors told him he only has two months to live.”

“Two months?” Oh man, Yunho thought, I ed up. Big time. “Is he taking chemo?”

“He has,” Kyuhyun assured, “But its spread all over his body. He probably won’t make it through the second chemo, he’s that bad.”

Yunho’s world was crashing down, and it was crashing fast. He had spent so much time worrying about his need of a family that he had forgotten that Changmin was his family. The only person that had supported him when everyone else shunned him down -- when everyone else ignored him and left him to die in failure.

Marrying Changmin had been the best decision he had ever taken despite the morals of society. Changmin had been the best thing that had ever happened to him, but along the way that devotion he had once had for the young lad had blurred. Yunho had concentrated so much on wanting something he hadn’t realized Changmin’s feelings.

Yunho would stare in envy at married couples who would play with their children at the parks, or in amusement events. Yunho wanted that, he craved it -- he yearned for it so much he pushed the only source of love he had, Changmin.

“How do I even show my face?” Mumbled Yunho. He was afraid Changmin would hate him for simply walking out the door, the young lad had every right to detest the human being Yunho had become.

“Just do it Yunho. Make amends before its too late.”

Kyuhyun walked out the door -- he left behind a saddened Yunho. Kyuhyun didn’t know who to pity more, Changmin or his husband.

Make sure he regrets leaving me, Changmin’s voice echoed inside Kyuhyun’s mind.

“I think I did a pretty good job,” Kyuhyun said to himself as he exited Yunho’s office. "If a guilty conscience is what he has then my job is done." 

----

It was ten in the morning, and instead of being at work, Yunho had been following Changmin since eight. His husband had gone out to what used to be their favorite coffee shop. Tears slipped down Yunho’s cheeks when he caught sight of what remained of his husband. The gray knitted sweater Changmin had on barely hugged his frame. The legs that used to be full of life and charisma were now frail and thin.

“What have I done?” whispered Yunho in between tears. I’ve done this to him, he thought.

If he had stayed he and Changmin would be going through this together, not separately. Maybe if he had stayed Changmin would have a smile etched on his lips -- unlike the saddened expression he was wearing at the current moment.

Yunho waited a little longer, he was hesitating whether or not he wanted to join Changmin inside the coffeehouse. He was procrastinating everything. Yunho decided on not getting out. He would watch Changmin from afar, maybe then he’d gain the courage he needed to actually go talk to his husband.

Everything had been quiet until a stream of people began to run out the Coffee shop. They were wailing for attention -- apparently someone had fainted. “Call an ambulance!” “Help!”

Yunho bolted out of his car and ran across the street. He was wearing a navy blue suit with light coffee shoes. He managed to get inside as fast he could, the permeated air of coffee beans slapped him across the face. He began to search within the crowd, he was hoping that it wasn’t Changmin whom had fainted. He prayed fervently -- for a man who had forgotten how to do such a thing, Yunho recited and recited.

He found his husband laying on the floor, unconscious. Yunho’s heart dropped, he felt every last happy memory flash upon him like a film. He remembered his vows, the moment he proposed, the promise of loving Changmin forever and ever -- he had broken so many of them. “Changdoll,” Yunho murmured as he got on his knees, he took a hold of Changmin’s body and pressed the young lad to his chest, “Please don’t go,” tears torrented down Yunho’s cheeks, he felt his body heat up in anger, in frustration. “Don’t leave me. I’ll be a better man for you -- I’ll take care of you.”

A lady approached him and told him the ambulance would arrive in a minute.

They reached the hospital, and Yunho vowed he wouldn’t let go of Changmin ever again.

----

Changmin opened his eyes two days later, at midnight. His body had been trying to fight off the virus that was spreading quickly within his body. There were plugs connected to places Changmin had no were possible. The doctors had inserted strong medication to kill off the virus. They had even spoken to Yunho about Changmin’s weak condition.

Changmin’s distorted vision cleared up and he was welcomed with a room full of orange blossoms. The white bouquets were beautifully laid out along the perimeter of the room. Changmin’s lips curled into a smile at the present -- he wondered if it had been Kyuhyun who had sent him his favorite flowers.

“I was beginning to worry,” butterflies began to drown Changmin’s stomach, that smooth baritone voice, he had missed its owner so much. Changmin looked up to find a handsome Yunho standing against the frame of the door.

Handsome didn’t define Yunho -- the way his tousled black hair shone with the hospital light, his bow shaped lips, that irresistible mole along his lip that Changmin adored. Yunho seemed ethereal, something unreachable, something impossible.

“What are you doing here?” Changmin asked, he gazed somewhere else other than Yunho. He couldn’t face the man he yearned for so long. “Shouldn’t you be at work? That seemed more important for the past six months.”

“I’m here with you, because you matter most Changdoll -- its just … “ Yunho sighed. He hated being wrong, but he hated not having Changmin with him the most. “I’m so sorry Min-ah, I didn’t mean to hurt you, I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I was stupid and ignorant. I should’ve thought of you rather than myself.”

Changmin’s heart was beating furiously, his breathing had become labored -- he was trying so hard to calm his nerves, to calm himself, but it was all too much. To hear Yunho say something so beautiful as that, it meant the whole world and universe combined. Six months without him -- six months without that gracious face and melodious voice. Six months without the love of his life, it had been hell, and other things combined.

Yunho approached Changmin and smoothed his lips across Changmin’s forehead. Oh that soft skin, he had craved for it. “Forgive me Min-ah, forgive me. I know I don’t deserve you, but damn, with all this, I realized I would hate myself for losing you. I would never forgive myself.”

Tears ran down Changmin’s face -- he would forgive the man anything. At that point of his life he could redeem anything. Forgive and forget. “Yunho,” Changmin spoke softly and Yunho withdrew just a tad bit in order to face the young lad. “The best thing about tonight’s that we’re not fighting.”

Yunho took a hold of Changmin’s hands and pressed them softly against his lips. He loved the younger lad, they were meant to be, Yunho could feel it. “Why did you tell me you only had two months to live?” he whispered while caressing Changmin’s cheek with the palm of his hand. “That about killed me.”

“I didn’t mean for Kyuhyun to lie to you -- but you about deserved it. Leaving me unattended like you did.”

Yunho elicited a chuckle and nodded, “You’re right baby, I did deserve it. I was stupid. Can you forgive this poor imbecile?”

Changmin wrapped his hand delicately behind Yunho’s neck and drew him in towards his lips. The kiss was slow, and short, and delicate and almost magical. They brushed their lips with one another, and that spark both had swore had died down burst like a ticking bomb. It had just been a question of time.

----

Within six months, the cancerous cells had disappeared from Changmin’s body. He still had a lot of recovery to do, but the couple was more than jovial at Changmin’s rapid recuperation. Yunho especially. He had promised Changmin he would be with him always from then on, and he had kept his word. He would take Changmin to chemotherapy, and help him rest whenever possible. He even learned to cook some new soups for his beloved -- everything for the young lad’s wellbeing. It was the least Yunho could do.

“Babe!” Changmin yelled from their upstairs bedroom, “Do you think you can bring me a cup of water? I need to take my medication before going to sleep?”

There was no answer. Changmin yelled again, but nothing. “Yunho?” he called out, “Are you there?” Changmin stepped out of their bedroom and looked down the staircase. The lights to the kitchen were on. Did he go outside? Changmin thought.

Changmin walked slowly down the stairs. He headed towards the light and called for Yunho whenever he got the chance. The house seemed empty. Changmin stepped forward into the kitchen -- his eyes widened when he caught sight of Yunho down one knee, rose petals decorated the wooden floor like a million wandering bugs. “What’s going on?”

The candles, the roses, and their vows were hung up in portraits in the living room. Changmin was in awe, he had never seen something so elegant and touching as he did then. Yunho had always been the romantic type, but this had exceeded anything in Changmin’s dreams. It was simple, true, but it meant so much for him.

“Marry me Min-ah.”

“But we’re already married,” tittered Changmin with a soft hum. He felt slightly embarrassed at his attire. He was wearing simple clothing, a black v neck and denim jeans. Yunho on the other hand was wearing Changmin’s favorite red cashmere sweater and black slacks.

“I don’t care,” replied Yunho with a smile on his face and a velvet box in his hand. Yunho got up and approached Changmin, he opened the box and flashed a smooth silver band with encrusted diamonds adorning it. “I want to marry you again. I would marry you countless times, in this lifetime and the next.”

Changmin wiped away the tears that brimmed his vision. “Today and always,” Yunho said while slipping the ring on Changmin’s wedding finger, “beyond tomorrow, I need you beside me, always as my best friend, lover, and forever soul mate.”

Tears torrented down Changmin’s face, his tears were warm and moving rapidly against the curve of his cheek. He didn’t know if he was happy or sad, it was all too much to take in. Changmin had thought about setting Yunho free, maybe then if Yunho returned, Changmin would have known that they were inseparable; but giving him up wasn’t the answer, and neither had been the separation. But Changmin was sure of one thing, he couldn’t live without Yunho -- and Yunho … well, he couldn’t live without his Changdoll either.

“Marry me?” asked Yunho once more when he pulled away to look into Changmin’s big doe eyes. They were shimmering, and simply alluring.

“I do.”

A/N: I know this isn't the drabble you were expecting. You guys were probably expecting the continuation of Son's of Eros -- but do not worry. I'm almost done with that. That shall be updated soon, along with another recommendation I have stored for you guys to read. Anywho, yes, this drabble is kind of sad, I think I might be PMS'ing and when that happens I'm just sad sad sad. Thank you so much for the support // ALSO -- if any of you would to like to request a prompt for this collection please send me private message. I would like to expand on my writing <3