Lee Taemin


After what happened at the shop last night I was still shaken up. It had been one of the most terrifying experiences of my life – the gross picture in the backroom of my shop was just to top it all off. I hadn't been able to check Cute Cups for any more damage … I had something much more important to do right now.

Jinki had been taken into hospital for the day and I had decided to leave the shop closed for today. According to the doctors the bridge of his nose was severely injured and would take over three weeks to heal completely. His jaw and other parts of his body were bruised as well, so he'd have to take it easy for a while.

I sighed and rested my head on my palm – I felt so guilty.
He shouldn't have come to Cute Cups that early in the first place … but when we were driven to the hospital in the ambulance car he told me he had only come because he had been worried about me.
“Idiot …” I mumbled more to myself than to him, but couldn't stop a soft smile to grow on my face.

I was sitting next to his bed and had taken his hand into mine when he had fallen asleep again. I didn't move and didn't speak to anyone, I only focused on him. Although his eyes were closed and his nose was covered with a bandage, he was still very handsome. While I was just watching him I noticed the defined features of his face, how his eye lashes were long, how his cheekbones were high and how his jaw had a nice shape – he was, to the core, the most handsome person I had ever seen.

As it got closer to night I noticed how I was continuously getting more and more tired. Jinki hadn't moved an inch and yet I never let go of his hand. I tried fighting sleep, but couldn't stop it coming over me after a while. I rested my head on the corner of the bed, my hand still gripping onto his. It didn't even take me more than a second to fall asleep.



*



“Hey.” when I heard Jongin, the heartthrob of the entire University, greet me in the hallway I frowned and dropped all my books. My cheeks were heating up quickly and I hastily crouched down to pick my stuff up. I heard people laughing at me in the hallway but tried hard to ignore them. However, when Jongin knelt down next to me and helped me gather my stuff I dropped the book I was holding all over again.

“Are you alright?” he asked with a smirk. I felt my heart hammering in my chest. “You seem nervous.”

“Y-Yes.” I tried hard to ignore how my voice got at least two octaves higher. “I'm okay.”
Jongin grinned and picked up my other book as well just when I had been reaching out for it – I hummed unconsciously when our hands brushed against each other.
“You're Lee Taemin, right?” he got back up to his feet and offered me his hand. “I always see you in the library.” I blushed a deep shade of red and took his hand, my own one shaking a bit.
“Y-Yeah … I'm … library.” I felt like a complete idiot. “I mean I-I'm always in the library …”

“Nice.” he nodded and tilted his head to the side – although he was a year younger than me he looked much more mature. “Wanna grab some coffee?”
I frowned and stared at him with round eyes. “Uhm …” I blinked and struggled to find the right words. “With … me? You and me?”

“Yes?” he furrowed his brow and I could tell that he was amused to no end. “I'll treat you, promise.”

“O-Okay.” I could tell that I much have looked like a huge goofball with my smile only growing, but when he offered to carry my books for me I only started grinning and walked to the coffee shop on our campus with him by my side.

My crush had just asked me out for coffee … my heart wouldn't stop hammering.



*



I kept waking up in the middle of the night and always had to re-take Jinkis hand. I kept my time going back to sleep – dreaming about Jongin had become a habit, but that didn't mean I liked it … in fact, I hated it.

“Hyung …” I leaned forward so I could take a look at his face. I smiled lightly and brushed his hair out of his forehead. A nurse earlier had brought a wet cloth for his forehead in order to cool down his fever. I got up and got a new one before placing it on him again. “Dream well, okay?” my heart was beating fast, but it wasn't as hard as it had been when we first met. My feelings for him were strong, and I was pretty sure I was crushing on him. “Thanks again.” I leaned down and put my head atop of his hand so that I was resting my cheek against it. I liked the feeling more than anything else and fell asleep with a content smile on my face.



*



When Jongin and I started dating it seemed like a mass panic had come up in school. Everyone was freaking out when they saw us – both positively and negatively – and all girls seemed to hate me. They were gossiping about me, wrote my name in the girls' bathroom – an old girlfriend of mine had told me – and played jokes on me. One time a few girls ambushed me when I had been on my way back to the dorm and had thrown eggs at me. One had hit my eye so that I had had to go to the emergency room with Jongin in the middle of the night.
It was getting rougher and rougher each day to be with Jongin, but we made it work somehow.

Jongin was, all together, the perfect boyfriend. He always picked me up from my lectures when he could, we always had dinner together and he often surprised me with small presents or little trips during the weekend. I felt like I was falling for him, and I was falling fast.

And the most amazing thing of all was that he had picked someone like me.

One afternoon, when he picked me up, he decided that we should celebrate our four month anniversary by going to a club. I had never been to one and told him I couldn't handle alcohol well – I tended to black out and not remember anything – but he since he said he'd make sure I was gonna be alright I trusted him and tagged along.

The club was fuller than anywhere I had ever been to before. I felt my eyes widen at all the people grinding against each other, dancing, drinking and jumping to the rhythm of the music. Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves, but I could already tell that this was not going to be my kind of thing.
Without even noticing I gripped onto Jongins jacket and stayed as close as possible as he puled me through the club and to the bar.
I told him I wanted something without alcohol and he respected that wish and got me a non-alcoholic cocktail.

The entire night seemed to go well – well, except for me being horrible when it came to clubbing – until we met one of Jongins friends from Uni. While we had been dancing – or me gripping onto him and jumping a bit – his friend, Sehun, had come up to us and danced with us. He only glanced at me every now and then and kept his focus on Jongin. However, Jongin then decided to go get some me and him another drink and left me with Sehun … which had been the worst idea ever.

Sehun had suddenly become all touchy-feely and tried to pull me closer to him and although I tried to shake him off he hadn't let me. I felt his hands grazing at my bum and gasped, always trying to get him to stop – he didn't though.
When Jongin returned I pretty much jumped into his arms and told him what was going on, but he brushed it off and said Sehun was just fooling around and that he meant no harm. Nevertheless, I told Jongin not to leave me alone with him.

The drink he had gotten for me was non-alcoholic again, but he handed it to Sehun when I tumbled and he had to help me to get back up. I focused on my drink again right away and, if I wasn't mistaken, I thought I had seen Sehun slip something into it. Thus, as he handed it to me, I refused, but was given weird looks by both of them and came to the conclusion that I had probably just imagined it.

Wrong.

Dead wrong.

Just a few moments after I had drunk, I felt myself getting dizzy, my vision started spinning and I felt my consciousness slipping away.



*



The next thing I could remember was laying on one of those hospital beds, my body shaking and covered in dirt. When I coughed I noticed how my breath smelt like vomit and shivered and tried to find something to grip onto.

For a reason I couldn't explain I felt gross.

I was disgusted by myself but couldn't really explain why.

I couldn't remember a single thing from last night. The last thing I knew was that Jongin had brought me to that club and that was it. I thought I would have made sure that I was drinking non-alcoholic cocktails, but apparently I had tried to get drunk … I was an idiot.

When I finally managed to blink my eyes open and sit up I saw that I was still wearing my own clothes. However, my shirt was ripped at the shoulder and I had scratches on my skin. My pants seemed a bit baggy for some reason and I could see both my legs shaking. I looked around and was greeted with a mirror on the wall on my right – what I saw scared me.
My hair was ruffled and sticking out to all directions, there was dirt on my cheeks and a small trace of saliva in both corners of my mouth. There were dark bags under my eyes and my entire face was as white as marble.

I looked like a ghost.

“Up yet?” I jumped a bit and turned my head. I felt relieved when I saw Jongin standing in the door frame. When I smiled a bit and tried to reach out for him he started glaring at me though. He didn't come over as well. “We're through.”
Those words made me freeze and I felt the smile vanishing quickly. I tried to form words, but couldn't. Instead I was paralyzed and couldn't stop him from coming over and grabbing my jaw roughly – it made me twitch. “What were you thinking.” he growled and stared at me in obvious disgust. “You tell me you wanna wait until you're 'ready'” I blinked and stared back at him in shock, “and then you go ahead and with my friend at a club!?” he stayed silent for a while, so I expected he wanted an answer.
“I-I …” I blinked repeatedly – for the first time since I knew him he was frightening me. “… w-what …?”

“You know exactly what I'm talking about!” he seemed to get even madder and gripped my jaw tighter, causing me to whimper. “Sehun comes up and the first thing you do is get rid of me and let him you in the bathroom!?” I blinked even faster, my heart was hammering in my chest.

What was he talking about?

I'd never do that.

“What kind of filthy are you!? I really liked you and would have waited for you! And this is what you do to me!?” he got louder with each word until he was yelling at me. I teared up when I saw tears drip down his cheeks. He started yelling insults at me and even though I tried to get out of his grip he wouldn't let me. He said I'd have to sit there and take what I deserved and no matter how often I told him that I couldn't remember a single thing he didn't seem to listen.

“Sehun told me exactly what happened …” he pushed me away so hard that I almost collapsed on the bed and only managed to look up at him with tears streaming down my face. “You put something in his drink … then purposely got rid of me and seduced him …” I widened my eyes and was about to say something when he raised his hand and was about to hit me. I quickly raised my arms over my head and cowered on the bed, preparing to get hit, but he seemed to recollect himself and stopped moving. Instead he looked at me as if I was some animal. “You disgust me.” he said and I saw him gritting his teeth and clenching his fists.

“Please …” I sniffled and rubbed my eyes, my arms shaking. I was feeling more helpless than ever before. “I-I'd never do that …” I cried into my hands and shook my head slowly. My entire body was hurting and I could feel my heart hammering against my chest. “I don't know what happened … please …” I started pleading and looked up at him with sad eyes, but he didn't seem to be interested in what I had to say. Instead he just looked at me pleading and eventually just turned away and left. Without saying another word. Without listening to me.

I just sat there on the bed, my breath hitching and heart beating faster and faster. I blinked as fast as I could, but it didn't stop my vision from spinning. I started panicking. I couldn't breathe anymore, I couldn't see and I felt my entire body aching and screaming for the pain to stop.
When I started crying louder and louder a couple of nurses soon came into the room and took care of me. Eventually, they called my parents to come and take me home.

I would never do something like that … not even if drunk.

What had happened?

… no matter how hard I tried to remember, it just wouldn't come back to me.



*



I woke with a yelp and tears dripping down my cheeks all over again – the memory of what happened always made me cry and desperate.
I breathed flat and quickly and I noticed how my grip on Jinkis hand tightened until my nails were digging into his skin. I looked around in panic and failed to see how Jinki was sitting in bed with a book in his free hand. He looked at me in surprise and quickly put the book away.

“Yah, Taemin-ah.” I heard his voice as if it was coming from a tunnel – he seemed far away … and that scared me even more. I tried to find him within my spinning vision, but I couldn't. So I cried out for him and only relaxed when he had pulled me into a hug. I was shaking in his arms and cried for a while longer, but eventually, and very slowly, I managed to breathe normally again and just rest against his chest. He kept mumbling soothing and calming words and it slowly started to work and I managed to calm down completely.

However, the sadness and the fear from that specific night stuck with me and although he was helping getting rid of it, it didn't quite go away.

“Are you okay now …?” he asked quietly and broke away only lightly in order to look at me. His eyes were full of worry and I saw that he really was concerned for me. “Did you have a bad dream?”

“… I … yeah.” I nodded slowly rubbed my eyes to get rid of all the tears once and for all. “Thanks …”
He hesitated before he asked: “Do you want to talk about it?” this time it was me who hesitated before I said, with a voice that was so full of fear and sadness that it surprised me myself: “I … think I need to tell you something …”

What would he think of me after he heard this part of my story …?



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Longest chapter by now. I decided it was time to uncover the first part of Taemins story. The rest of it will follow shortly. Afterwards you will get to read all about Jinkis story. Maybe there will be surprises, who knows ^^

Thanks for reading (if you did)!!~