Lee Jinki


My heart was racing inside of my chest – I was more nervous than ever. This was going to be the first time in ages that I was gonna see my daughter, Lee Seohyun. She was barely two years old and yet my ex-wife, Kim Taeyeon, had somehow managed to get her to dislike me … but I was gonna change that today.

When I rang the doorbell I forced myself to smile when Taeyeon opened. She looked just like always, her long, blonde hair was tied into a ponytail and hanging over her shoulder. She was beautiful, just like always, but she looked tired, there were dark rings under her eyes.
“Hey.” I said and handed her the flowers I brought. “You look … nice.”

“Oh, shut up.” she said and took the flowers. “You want Seohyun, right?” she closed the door so I wouldn't be able to come inside. However, when she returned, she was holding a bag in dark blue with silver stars on it – I had bought her that bag right after she was born. “Bring her back by tonight, 6pm. She has to sleep early.” right after she had handed me the bag she went back inside and returned with my beautiful little girl in her arms. Seohyun looked at me in surprise, her dummy in . Her hair had grown and went down to her shoulders now, her cheeks were chubby and eyes round and blue.

“Seohyun-ah … hi.” I reached my arms out and gently took her off Taeyeon. She whined a bit but didn't struggle like she did last time. “How's my baby girl, hm?” I smiled at her and bounced her in my arms. When she smiled a bit I felt my heart skip a beat out of happiness. I was just about to tell Taeyeon thanks and that I was gonna bring her back later I was faced with the sight of a closed door – Taeyeon was just difficult like that.

I picked up the bag and walked back to my car with Seohyun in my arms. I had already put the children's seat up in the front and eventually drove off with her sitting next to me. She was playing with her little doll which I had given to her.
I was actually on my way to the children's park to spend time with her when a thought crossed my mind. I had been visiting Taemin at Cute Cups every few days for two weeks now, we had become friends. And when I saw him last Thursday he said he loved children and wanted to have kids of his own as well. Maybe he'd like it if I stopped by with Seohyun and then headed to the kids' park?

I headed to Cute Cups right away then and parked where I always parked, right in front of the entrance … since Taemin rarely ever had any customers it was always an available parking option. I grabbed Seohyun and carried her inside. Taemin was standing at the counter and was busy decorating a piece of cake, but he looked up when I came in. The confused look on his face quickly turned to a happy expression and he smiled. And when he realized that I was carrying my baby daughter his grinned widened.
“Is that your daughter?” he asked and cleaned his hands as he came over. I nodded and he let out a squeal. “She's so cute!” he said excitedly and leaned down so he could look at her closely. “How old is she? Two, right?”

“Yeah. She turned two a few weeks back.”

“Aww …” he continued to stare at her and eventually poked her cheek with his index finger. When she squealed he grinned. Seohyun just giggled when he started to poke and tickle her, she seemed to enjoy it. “I love kids …” Taemin said, his voice a bit sad. “It's too bad I don't have any …”

“You're only 24, you've got time, so relax.” I said with a chuckle and looked at him. He just stuck his tongue out to me and shrugged, saying: “Still. You're, like, 28 and you've got a kid … and such a cute one on top of that.” and with that he went back to playing with Seohyun. I just smiled at him and sat down at the nearest table with him and her. When I asked if he'd like to hold her he seemed to excited that his hands shook for a moment. We both laughed when we noticed and he ended up holding Seohyun for a while – he didn't even want to give her back anymore.
We fooled around for a bit until I had an idea. “Taemin-ah, could you close the shop early today? I … wanted to go to the playground with Seohyun and … you wanna come along?”
His eyes widened and a smile spread on his face. “Yes!” he exclaimed. “Let's go!” he jumped up and ripped his apron off of himself. I could only laugh when he hurried to the back of the shop and started to put everything away. Seohyun was crawling around on the carpet, her little turtle plushie in her hands.

“Wait!” he suddenly exclaimed, causing me to twitch and look back at him. He was suddenly right in front of me again, a plate in his hand. “Could you try this? I wanna put it on the menu and advertise it then … maybe more customers will come that way.”
I looked at the piece of cake and couldn't help but to laugh a bit – it just looked so cute. It appeared to be a cherry-cream piece of tart with chocolate chips on top, which were arranged in a heart shape. “It looks amazing, Taemin-ah. You're really good with this kind of stuff …”

“Try it.” he insisted and pushed the plate into my hand. “I made this in case you were coming by today …” his cheeks turned a fade shade of pink as he said that, but I only smiled. When I took a bite of it his eyes widened and he leaned in closer. “So?” he asked and stared at me. “Is it good?”

“It's amazing.” I replied and grinned at him. “When did you come up with this?”

“Last night.” he replied and leaned down, gently picking up Seohyun from the carpet so she wouldn't crawl off. When she looked at the cake he took a tiny piece of it and fed it to her. “I was just thinking at home … and … I got that idea.”

“Well, it's great. I think you just need to advertise your stuff properly. Maybe I could help?” I watched as he played with Seohyun and smiled a little bit when they seemed to get along well.
“That would be … really nice.” he said with a soft voice and looked at me. “Advertisement … I just … don't have the money for things like that.” his voice died a bit and I realized that money was a soft spot for him. So I changed the subject and we eventually ended up closing his shop for the day. He was continuously holding Seohyun and I didn't mind at all – she seemed to really like him, after all. We ended up driving to the nearest playground where I let Taemin and Seohyun out while I looked for a parking spot. I told Taemin to go already and not wait for me, which he did.

I thought a lot while I was just driving around. I saw so many families with their kids and it made me think back a year, when Taeyeon and I were still together. When Seohyun had turned six months old we had gone to a roofed playground as it had been raining a lot that day. That day had been really nice, we had gone to Taeyeon's favorite restaurant – she's always loved Sushi – and then spent most of the evening with looking at pictures and cheesy things just like that. A smile was on my face whenever I saw families walking around, but I couldn't deny that it hurt me a bit as well – why couldn't my family be like that …?

When I eventually reached the playground I spotted Taemin in the sandbox with my daughter. They didn't have any shovels, cups or other toys, but they seemed to be having fun anyways. I took my time walking over and couldn't help but to feel quite affectionate towards Taemin when I saw how he treated Seohyun. There was always a smile on his face and the way he guided Seohyun's hands and gave her her dummy back whenever she dropped it made my heart flutter – it felt nice to watch him.

“Heya …” I said softly once I had reached them. I had brought the starry bag and put it down next to Taemin. “Are you having fun?” the smile he gave me was probably the most beautiful I had ever seen. He nodded and replied: “Very. She's very smart, you know?”

“She's got it from her Mom.”

“Don't say that.” he furrowed his brow and shook his head. “You're just as smart, I bet. Or even smarter. Don't make yourself down for no reason.” he said it with such an easiness that I just couldn't help but to feel a bit embarrassed – I had meant what I just said.
“Well … alright.” I said with a shrug and watched as Seohyun played with the sand and the toys I brought her. We stayed silent for a long time, not even looking at each other since I felt a bit embarrassed now. However, after a while of just watching and playing with Seohyun Taemin eventually asked: “You know that day we met? When you entered my shop, soaking wet?” I raised my brows and looked up at him. When I nodded he continued: “What the hell happened to you that day?”

“Uhm …” I blinked and looked at him for a bit, pondering about whether I should actually tell him or not. Eventually I just decided to go for it, it wasn't like he out of all people would judge me. “My wife and I divorced about two years ago and she got full custody of Seohyun-ah afterwards. It had been my last year of University, so it threw me off track with my studies a bit. I got on with it though and focused on them instead of my family … might not have been the best decision, now that I think about it.” I paused and blinked at nowhere in particular. My heart was beating all weirdly in my chest, it didn't feel good to talk about this. “Well, anyway, my ex-wife and I don't really talk anymore. It's my fault.” I added that since Taemin gave me a weird look. “I didn't have time for her or for our daughter … after I finished my studies I got into work right away and was hardly ever home …” when Taemin was about to ask something I added that I had been living in a one-room apartment ever since the divorce, and was still living there, to be frank.
I continued telling him how I had been working most of the time after the divorce. It made me feel better that he didn't interrupt me and it somehow felt nice to finally have said all this out loud for a change. “And, then, I was invited to a job interview at a University.” I smiled a bit when I finally got to this point. “I was so excited, just imagine, a University professor at the age of 28 … it would have been amazing.” I found myself grinning to myself and tried not to, but just let it be in the end. “I left my job at the elementary school. If they invited me to a job interview they'd take me, right …? Yeah, well, no.” the smile faded all on its own now and I saw a pout forming on Taemin's lips. Seohyun was sitting on his lap, the small shovel in her hands was filled with sand and making his pants dirty, but he didn't seem to care at all. “Right after the interview they told me they wouldn't take me over as professor … so of course I was upset. Taeyeon had been right all along.” by now Taemin knew that Taeyeon was my ex-wife, so he didn't even question it anymore. “She always said I'd never get to be a professor, she said I would always teach elementary kids … I wasn't good enough for me. And now I know she was rig– ”

“Stop.” Taemin suddenly whined and looked at me with an upset expression. “Hyung, I hate it when people make themselves worse than they actually are. Don't do it, please.” he crossed his arms in front of his face, showing me an X and puffed his cheeks. “Please.”
I just raised my brows and played with the sand in front of me for a while, before nodding. “Fine. When they told me they didn't want me I was upset and just ran outside. I tripped, fell into the puddle, lost my suitcase and had pretty much the worst day of my entire life. And that's when I ended up in your shop, and …” I frowned, I hadn't intended to use the 'and'.

“And?” Taemin looked at me with his head tilted to the side. He was caressing Seohyun's hair as she had eventually stopped playing and was just patting the sand with her tiny hands.
“… it … kinda … saved my day.” I ended with my cheeks burning up. I heard how he chuckled but didn't dare to look at him – hell, this was embarassing to no end … true, but embarrassing.
“I'm glad I could help.” I looked up just in time to see him saluting to me and chuckled a bit myself. “Cute Cups was made to cheer people up.” he added with a cute tone in his voice. He made me smile just by looking at him.
“Say … how did Cute Cups come to be, anyway?” I had just meant to keep the conversation going, but this somehow upset him. Everything that indicated a content mood vanished from his facial expression and he looked at me for a while blankly. I was just about to ask whether I had crossed some sort of line when he suddenly said: “I didn't go to Uni, that's why. There's nothing more I can do.” he picked up Seohyun and sat her next to him. I just watched in confusion as he started putting all the toys back into the starry bag. “I wanna go home now.”

That made my heart ache a bit.

“Did … did I say something wrong?” I asked.
“No. I just wanna go home.” his voice was a bit shaky and even though he was trying to hide it, I was no fool, I heard and saw it all. I saw how his cheeks reddened, how his eyes got teary and how he hurried to put everything away. However, when he didn't say or do anything that wold have kept this conversation alive I decided to let it be and started putting everything away as well. In the end I had the starry bag on my shoulder and Taemin was holding my daughter.

“Should I drive you?” I asked with a soft voice. When he just handed Seohyun to me and zipped up his jacket I took it as a no though.
“No, thanks … I'll take the train. It's not far from here, anyway …”

“Where do you live?”

“Ginpo. Just let me be now …” he mumbled and put his beanie back on. “I … sorry, Hyung.” and with that he just turned away without giving me a second look. He hurried off and soon disappeared behind a corner, leaving me utterly confused.
I looked at Seohyun who seemed tired in my arms and sighed heavily, my heart beating all weirdly again.

“What the hell just happened …” I mumbled and turned away before heading to my car.




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Third chapter done, I feel like I'm on a roll ^3^

Thanks for reading (if you did)!!~