Jongin's nervous. Like, really, really nervous. It's the kind of antsiness he feels when he's just a minute away from performing in front of over a hundred thousand pair of eyes. And really, right now, he's only in his sister's café about thirty minutes earlier than he's supposed to be but again, he's too edgy to care about anything else but being punctual.

He reclines a hip against the counter, slouches his shoulders and shrinks himself. He doesn't realize he's fidgeting until his sister gives him a couple pats to his back and he freezes; then, vaguely noticing the sudden halt to his moving body and moving limbs.

"Care to finally explain why you're back here?" She enquires as she pulls him away from discomfort to the nearest two-seater table. Jongin still manages to pull a chair out for her before he takes his own place, though. He wishes there's an interlude to his racing heart when he collapses onto the chair.

"My sister owns a café," Jongin teases. "Am I not allowed to pay a visit to you and this place?" He wiggles his eyebrows, propping his elbows on the cool surface of the table.

She disbelievingly sends him a look before pointing out, "You haven't been here for a month."

He sighs. "I've been practicing hard for my next solo stage," it isn't a lie. And then, like a fallen crème brûlée, Jongin's body retracts as he feels himself resigning from avoiding the question. "I met Baekhyun yesterday... As a different person he can't recognize. I'm meeting him again—soon, and  that's why I'm here. I chose this place because noona, I need moral support."

"I get the part where you're nervous and you require moral support from me but what exactly did you mean you met him as a different person he can't recognize?"

Jongin grimaces, knowing he has to explain what he never bothered to say in the past. He's never told anyone about it, only Taemin and Jongdae but no one else at all. "Baekhyun knows Kim Kai, but Baekhyun doesn't know Kim Jongin," he reiterates slowly, cutting to the chase in the simplest way he knows of. 

His sister's eyes widen.

"You can't be serious," she pauses just to eyeball her dongsaeng. "Oh my God, Jongin ah, you're serious." 

Jongin doesn't maintain eye contact because he doesn't know how to when she's making him feel ashamed for hiding his real identity from Baekhyun.

It's never really crossed his mind to tell Baekhyun his real name because:

1. Only people who are as close to him as Taemin and Jongdae are, know his real name which is only a handful whom he still keeps in touch with and that really means something because Jongin never saves anyone's contact numbers.
2. Jongin prefers people addressing him as Kai, his old nickname back in dance school that he had brought forth to his own school so he didn't think it was a problem.
3. Jongin knows Baekhyun can't be a long term friend because they met when Baekhyun had came to Seoul with his family in Summer, 9 years ago—Jongin was 17 and Baekhyun was 19—so he was sure that it wouldn't be a problem.

And at least it wasn't, until he realized how big of one it actually turned out to be when he'd came face to face with Baekhyun yesterday afternoon.

"It's also not a secret that Baekhyun had gotten into a car crash, causing him to lose his memory a year after he'd left Seoul," and left me. Jongin feels his chest tighten. He'd remember it so clearly the day he'd heard of the news from his mother.

"Umma, why do you look like you're about to cry?" He asks, the moment he steps into the house. He's just gotten back from dance practice and his feet had been hurting the whole way home. He wraps his arm comfortingly around his mother.

"I received a call from Baekhyun's appa," he feels his breathing growing heavier by the second. "Baekhyun's been in an accident and he's awake now, but he's suffering from partial memory loss. When he heard that you needed to be informed about it.... He asked, who's Kai—but Jongin ah, please— Jongin ah!" She yells, tears finally streaming down her face but Jongin doesn't see it.

He's out of the house with his shoes in a hand, and he's running.

He's running away from the call, from what he's just heard. He doesn't believe he could be erased from someone's memory so easily, he doesn't want to believe anything else. How could he be the only one hopelessly in love with Baekhyun, the only one who remembers the memories they had made the year before, the only one who remembers every ing thing about the older boy, only to know he's gone from his memory, just like that, to someone who means so much to him in return?

Jongin's heart wrenches at the familiar feelings of the past resurfacing once again. This is precisely why he can't do this alone even if he wishes to. He regrets refusing to confess to Baekhyun about the way he feels towards him before he'd left Seoul—even after some years he still does but whenever he finds himself thinking of Baekhyun in the last few years, he's glad he didn't.

Because deep down he knows that every thing would hurt twice as much if he'd said a word.

"Jongin ah..." He hears his sister say softly before she caresses his face gently, comfortingly, the way older sisters take care of their younger siblings. "He's here now, he just got his car parked. You're a strong man, Jongin ah, but what you remember, he doesn't. Be careful of your choice of words, I'll be around so loosen up."

And as quickly as his heart thuds in his chest, his sister is back behind the counter helping out with orders from customers.

He braces himself, counts to 10 but before he reaches 7, he feels soft fingers trailing mindlessly down his arm as Baekhyun's light pants fill his eardrums.

"Jongin-ssi," Baekhyun begins breathlessly; the corners of his lips tugging lightly into a smile. "Nice seeing you again."

Jongin rises from his seat before he even looks to acknowledge Baekhyun, and he's returning the smile Baekhyun has on his face, except, his is a bigger, brighter one. "Hey, I wasn't expecting you to be here so early."

"I'm a punctual person," Baekhyun chuckles softly. 

Jongin almost misses the little gestures Baekhyun makes with his delicate looking hands towards the both of them and very quickly, they're seated with the menus before their faces. 

Baekhyun's the one to speak up again, "What's your favorite drink here?"

Jongin feels his eyes light up at the question, despite it coming rather abruptly. Before he has the chance to compose himself to answer, he hears himself lightheartedly saying, "Chocolate mint kamongccino, I've loved that since forever."

"Really?" Baekhyun lifts an eyebrow. He's still maintaining that small curve of lips and all Jongin wants to do is stretch them a little wider so he shows his teeth because he's able to tell that Baekhyun's being awkward. "I'll try that out, then. I've never had that before." 

Jongin briefly nods, "You won't regret it. I'll take the orders, give me a minute."

He jumps at the opportunity to brush off the additional nerves in his body as he walks towards the empty counter where he sees his sister standing behind the cashier; eyes bright with a wide smile on her face and expecting him. "So, it's barely been one minute but how's it going so far?"

"Two choco mints," he ignores first. "And one still slightly nervous Kim Jongin," right after a deep exhale, Jongin falls forward to balance his weight on the counter top. "Noona, he's being awkward," he complains quietly, cupping his face in his palms. He hears a giggle.

Trust her to laugh at him in situations like that.

"He seems normal enough though," she giggles again. "One thing for sure that I'm aware of? If I were him, I'd stretch my cheeks a little. He won't stop doing that smile thing."

"I know," Jongin sighs. When he drops his hands, two ready chocolate mint drinks are sat side by side before his eyes but when he reaches for the wallet in his back pocket, he's stopped and waved off.

"My treat, for my baby brother and his— and Baekhyun," she ends softly, and Jongin looks past the hint of sympathy in her eyes. It's not needed at a time like that, and he feels his heart sting from what he thinks she was going to say.

But he doesn't let her feel bad. 

"It's not a date, by the way," he chuckles. And then he has his back turned, walking away with the drinks in his hand. He gets back to the table sooner than he thinks and he's glad he doesn't feel as nervous as he'd been initially.

Though he's not sure he can speak for Baekhyun on that part.

He passes Baekhyun his drink before he sits down, taking a sip of his own. He watches Baekhyun curiously, seeing as he reaches out to it and brings the straw to his lips—then, he looks away momentarily. He can't look on, but when he does so again, Baekhyun's set the drink back in place.

"What do you think of it?" Jongin tilts his head to the side reflexively.

"Fantastic," Baekhyun grins. "I may have just fallen in love with something new."

Jongin gulps. His heart might just catch on fire.

"Anyway, I've discussed about your request with my boss and he has no objections. Therefore, Jongin-ssi, I'm looking forward to working with you. I'll do my best for you,"  Baekhyun's eyes glints from the reflecting light above their heads. Jongin notices his all natural smile now and he can't not smile back at the perfect sight.

"That's great, I have zero doubts in your capability." I hope Jongdae didn't tell you I'd actually planned this but perhaps one day, I'll tell you about it. "And please, just call me Jongin. I detest honorifics so I'm hoping I could call you hyung, too."

Baekhyun stares at him. Jongin feels like a massive ball of wrecking nerves.

"That would be really great," Baekhyun breaks out laughing after a while, and even though Jongin's baffled, he discovers himself laughing along anyway. "If I can be honest, I felt like I might explode if we carried on being incredibly formal. I apologize though, because I know we're supposed to be professional but—"

"You never have to be sorry over anything," Jongin interrupts gently. 

And then for the second time so far, Jongin sees the smile he's been wanting on Baekhyun's face, again. His heart is fluttery and warm and he can only think about how captivating Baekhyun is in the time that he's quiet. 

It always used to be like this, anyway. When their families hung out together. The both of them would always sit next to each other; Baekhyun would be the one speaking throughout, always talking, with his lips endlessly moving and Jongin would be the one listening, occasionally throwing in unnecessary commentaries and laughing when he finds something funny. He had adapted to the way Baekhyun is.

He'd had a tough time trying to fill up the void that used to be Baekhyun's voice, Baekhyun's laughter, Baekhyun's everything. And only with the help of dancing. It was that year after they'd met, before he could tell Baekhyun he'd passed an audition to a company, that everything came crashing down. 

He can't forget that day.

"—don't you think so?"

Jongin snaps back into reality. "Sorry, didn't catch that. What?"

Baekhyun ing sends Jongin the tiniest smirk that makes Jongin feel physical pain in his chest but he hides it and well, due to much practice. "I said, I think it would be nice if I could come here everyday. It's classy and cute, nice and cozy. The first time I came here I didn't think this way."

"Hyung," Jongin deadpans. "It's only because I'm here that your perspective's changed." And then he's smiling like a fool, and he knows it but he doesn't care because Baekhyun is smiling, too, and he wants to think the faint tint of pink on his cheeks is caused by him.

"Yah!" He grumbles, facing away. "Your wishful thinking isn't gonna benefit you in the long run," Baekhyun jokes, taking a mouthful of chocolate mint afterwards. Jongin takes his words lightly because it's Baekhyun. Most times this man knows the limit but other times, he's either blinded or blinded. Either way. 

Jongin still doesn't mind, though.

But he does wonder, if the reason Baekhyun eases into comfort easily around Jongin is because he faintly remembers him. It tempts him to ask Baekhyun about it, but he knows better and all of a sudden, Jongin realizes the importance of not speaking sometimes.

Silent observation is all that's needed during times like that.

He takes another sip of chocolate mint.

"Honestly, though. When was the first time you'd been here?" Jongin arches a brow. He doesn't really remember when this café had been established but he knows he's never came down here with Baekhyun. 

"I came with Jongdae like a year ago, I guess," Baekhyun almost goes on to tell him about who he is, but Jongin nods him to a stop. 

Sometimes he wishes Baekhyun hadn't lost his memory, because he really wants to share about his life with Baekhyun, tell him everything he did with Jongdae when the both of them have got time to spare in the years that Baekhyun was busy directing, filming and producing and completely unaware of Jongin's existence apart from knowing, maybe, The Kim Jongin. He wishes he could tell Baekhyun that he'd met Jongdae when he was on the rise of being a celebrity. 

And that Jongdae knows how Jongin feels about Baekhyun, who doesn't recall anything about him at all. 

"You wanna know something?" Jongin leans forward, bringing his face closer to Baekhyun's who shunned a little bit. He nods though, and Jongin merely chuckles silently as he dips his head to drink again. "My noona runs this café."

"The one by the counter, right?" Baekhyun's lips curve to form a small 'o' as he nods slowly. "She seems really sweet, always smiling. You resemble her a lot."

"Yeah. She's a great person," Jongin smiles. It's more of a smile to himself, rather than Baekhyun, but he doesn't overlook the corners of Baekhyun's mouth tugging higher at his own one. "Are you calling me sweet?"

"You're not sweet, I can tell," Baekhyun chortles. 

His words strikes Jongin's heart but not in the way that hurts him, but in the way that saddens him because for a moment, everything seems fine, like how it used to be based on the way Baekhyun remembers and describes him to be when in reality, Baekhyun still doesn't remember him and he's only saying that as what he perceives.

"Don't you have practice today?"

"I do."

"But you asked me out?" Baekhyun concludes in puzzlement, and Jongin's eyebrows are ready to shoot upward when he sees the older man flushing in embarrassment at his own choice of words. "I meant asked to meet—me for tea."

Jongin's still raises his eyebrows and he eyes Baekhyun, thoroughly amused. He really hasn't changed much, maybe never even did at this aspect about him. It makes Jongin feel tingly on the insides.

"I just wanted to see you," Jongin shrugs his shoulders. 

He doesn't see the point of hiding the truth, he never used to. He admits that things may be going a little too fast for Baekhyun's liking, but he's trying. And even if Baekhyun's reactions may not necessarily go the way he wishfully thinks and mindlessly dreams—at the end of the day, at least he won't be able to say he hadn't tried.

He's nervous again when he notices himself trying to seem casual as he keeps his eyes on level with Baekhyun's. He draws in a silent, deep breath and prays that Baekhyun doesn't hear it wobble weakly in the process. Baekhyun's rolls his lower lip into his mouth and lets out a laugh to Jongin's surprise.

"Did you not want to see me?" Jongin naturally says, lifting an eyebrow and narrowing his eyes.

"You're brusque," Baekhyun shakes his head, regaled with Jongin's words. "But somehow, as much as I want to mind it, I don't."

Jongin smugly flashes Baekhyun his best grin, before he pushes his weight and leans back against the chair, contented. Please remember me soon, Baekhyun hyung, I'll do everything I can in this period to make it possible. 

Baekhyun reciprocates the grin, and Jongin feels their knees brushing lightly against each other beneath the table.