4.

The more Suho was thinking about it, the more he was inclined to believe that it would, indeed, be a waste of his efforts if he did not even try to court Irene after what they had already been through together. Half way into their romantic arrangement, he found that he minded less and less her presence and disruption she brought into his life. While he was still annoyed by the majority of her actions, he also had to admit that she was also one of the most reasonable women that he’d had a pleasure of meeting and that in long run, her meddling had been nothing but beneficial.

The conclusion was clear - his companions were indeed right in opening his eyes to the simple fact that this might be his only opportunity to gain a stable, reasonable life partner whom he would not particularly mind having by his side and who would not constantly embarrass him. However, there was just one tiny obstacle to successfully achieving the goal of marrying Irene.

That obstacle was  Irene herself.

The girl had already stated clearly that she had no interest in marrying Suho and for the life of him, he could not figure out why. All the more now, when he himself had suddenly developed an interest in the institution of marriage. Marriage to her, of course. Because although never sincere, he had received a lot of attention from girls who liked his money more than they ever liked him, so to be rejected so unceremoniously by the one person whose affection he now wanted suddenly felt bitter.

Although he had not even thought about the issue before, he’d definitely started minding it now, and hated the idea of not being somebody’s natural first choice. Seriously, was there something wrong with Irene Bae? He wasn’t the most pleasant or charming of men, that much he understood himself, but he had been continuously told he was handsome, dressed well and he was rich, so what was there not to like? Surely, she would not expect to spend much time with him after they got married?

Distressed, he dialled his friend’s number.

‘Hell-‘

‘Would a girl you intend to marry expect to spend a lot of time with you after you actually sign the contract?’ Suho asked, not giving Sehun any time to greet him and not bothering to greet him in return.

Sehun shortly chuckled at the question, taken aback. Suho took a deep breath, preparing himself for yet another one of his lectures.

‘What you need to do first, my friend, is take a deep breath. What you need to do after is remember that you are not signing a contract, but getting married.’

‘Isn’t it the same? Both sides seek understanding and mutual benefits.’

‘…Forget it, how about I just marry Irene instead? She’s a cool lass, I can’t believe she actually approached you first. I know that in her place, I would not.’

‘You are not helping me at all.’ Suho interrupted impatiently. He stood up and started pacing around the room, documents on his desk forgotten, probably for the first time in his life. ‘You are responsible for this mess, you told me it was beneficial to marry her. So now that I’ve thought this through three times already and must hesitantly concur, just tell me how to get married to her.’

‘Suho-yah, unless you drag and kidnap her, you can’t just marry her.’

‘…Is that illegal? Because I think that technically, it can be arranged, can’t it?’ Suho cut in, sounding hopeful. Anything sounded better than actual human interaction.

‘No, absolutely no kidnapping of the lovely Irene. There is only one way of persuading a lady to marry you and that is through courtship. Both of us know perfectly that there is not even an ounce of romanticism or charm in you, my friend, so we will have to teach you what to do. You’re good at memorising, let’s see how well you can act.’

‘You mean…?’ Suho gasped, not believing his own ears. He caught the meaning behind the words right away.

‘Yes, that’s exactly what I mean. She thinks of this as a pure business transaction because you constantly remind her of it. What’s more, she’s having the laugh of her life on your expense, always teasing you and doing what she wants with you. It’s time for you to start behaving like a man. Girls like that.’

‘I don’t like that.’ Suho admitted. Not being a man, mind you, but the things he knew that Sehun implied. ‘Buying flowers and reciting poems is very unproductive and a waste of time.’

‘I completely agree. You will instead ask her to accompany you on a trip, where you will spend a romantic evening drinking wine and feeding her lines that I will teach you. You will start holding her hand and calling her out of the blue. When she is out of her element, wondering why you’ve changed so much and whether Ebola virus has attacked your brain, that’s when we will strike and secure the base.’

‘What base?’ Suho asked, losing plot somewhere along his friend’s long speech.

‘You really need to spend more time with people, who speak a normal language.’ Sehun said only, sighing. ‘She has to at least believe that you have the potential to change your strange habits in order to be impressed by you.’

‘Well then, should I now call her and ask her out to lunch? Is that what you call unpredictable? It’s not on the schedule for today.’ Suho gave up trying to understand all that Sehun said. When he had warmed up to the idea of asking Irene for her hand, he had not imagined that the simple act would have so many rules and implications. Never mind Sehun, he should just ask assistant Do to draw a marriage proposal and mail it as soon as possible.

That would be more efficient and less time consuming.

‘But she’s already out with Minseok, remember?’ Sehun replied.

‘I cannot remember something that I had no previous knowledge of.’ Suho frowned.

‘You two are in a relationship, yet you don’t know what her plans for today are? Did you not talk to her?’

‘Of course I talked to her. I called her last night. She did not mention anything.’ Suho did not like the feeling that started accumulating at the bottom of his stomach. The weird pressure was making him nauseous.

‘Just because she doesn’t say something, doesn’t mean that you should not ask on your own. Let that be the first lesson for you: stop talking about yourself and take interest in her, instead. Whatever you do, she should always be your priority. That’s the first and the most important page of the manual.’

‘Where can I buy the manual?’

 ‘When you do that,’ Sehun did not even bother gracing his friend’s stupidity with a reply ‘you will stop being a freaking child that she has to take care of and will turn into a man that she can rely on.’

‘And we want that.’ Suho summarised, nodding to himself, albeit a bit unsurely.

‘Yes, we want that.’ Sehun confirmed.

‘Where are you?’ After ten minutes of staring at his cell and pretending that he was not a petty person, he grabbed the device and quickly dialled Minseok’s number.

‘I’m having lunch.’ Suho heard his friend taking a sip of his drink.

‘With whom?’ Suho asked again, more demanding.

‘With a friend. What’s with the curiosity?’ Minseok grinned. It was the grin that translated well into his tone of voice because Suho suddenly knew he was being made fun of. Be a man, Sehun said.

‘I know you’re with Irene and I want to know why.’ Was this what Sehun meant? Suho wasn’t sure but he had to say it anyway. He heard Minseok laugh. Suho huffed, irritated. ‘This isn’t funny. She can’t be seen with you if she’s marrying me.’

‘Whoa, hold your horses. I think any other person on the planet has more chances of doing that than you do right now, my friend. With the way you are now, it’s impossible. I would also argue that you cannot make plans regarding two people without asking for the other party’s opinions first. Do you see my point?’

Meeting Irene’s questioning gaze, Minseok merely shrugged and smiled reassuringly. Suho, he mouthed. That served as the best explanation.

‘What are you trying to say? You encouraged me to marry her and now you’re stabbing me in the back?’

‘You’re clearly angry. I’ll stop by your office later so we can discuss this further. Have a nice day.’

‘Wait, you can’t just-‘ But Minseok already hang up.

Suho sat down, realising that he was heaving from the lack of oxygen used for the conversation. He had become agitated and it was completely unnecessary. He started massaging his temples in a vain attempt to calm himself, trying to think of a solution. He did not need any of this. He could just call Irene and announce that he decided to back out of their deal. He could erase her phone number and burn the polo shirt she’d bought him. He would go back to his quiet life and it would be as if the marriage prospect had never entered his life.

He knew he should do that because Irene’s presence and the amount of time he dedicated to either being with her or thinking about her had escalated too quickly. But somehow he could not follow what he regarded as his natural preservation instinct. Just like he did not like the idea of Minseok eating lunch with Irene without telling him about it first.

Or eating with her at all, for that matter. He took a deep breath and picked up the phone again. Irene answered after three rings.

‘Yes?’

‘I don’t want you spending alone time with Minseok. Or any other man.’ Suho just said flatly, not caring if he sounded like a lunatic.

‘I won’t if you give me one good reason why I shouldn’t.’ She replied calmly without missing a bit, choosing not to mock him like he had expected her to. At this point, there was nothing else he could say to that, except the truth.

‘I have discovered I feel sick when you do.’ He said matter-of-factly. Irene dropped her fork, completely taken aback, and leaned on her chair instinctively.

‘…Excuse me?’

‘I fear that because of you, I am developing symptoms of a deadly disease. My pulse is rising and I have this strange sensation at the pit of my stomach, something nauseating. I become agitated without meaning to. Do I have to continue?’

‘No, that’s quite enough.’ She replied quietly. She sighed. Could this be true? Kim Junmyeon … jealous of her, Bae Joohyun? Or was he really just infected with a mad cow disease? She wouldn’t put it past him.  ‘I’ll… I’ll see you at your office in an hour. I’m almost done here.’ She hang up without waiting for his answer.

Minseok observed quietly as his friend put the cell back into her purse and lift the fork again, but without any real intention to go back to eating her steak. He eventually broke the silence.

‘He sounded mad jealous just now.’ He commented casually. Irene smiled, raising one eye brow in question. He laughed. ‘Well, ok. He sounded as jealous as he could ever be, considering it is Suho we’re talking about.’

‘You call him Suho.’ She noticed. He shrugged.

‘It’s been a few years since he started using this name. I eventually got used to it. Junmyeon is his paternal grandfather’s name. Very old fashioned, just like pretty much everything about my friend.’

‘I did not know that.’ She admitted softly.

‘The real question is, what is going to happen after this charade is over? Did you actually think it through?’ It was her turn to shrug.

‘No, not really. I was surprised to see him again after so long, more so that we happened to clash on the same industrial field. He’d changed his name too… But everything about him remained the same.’ She laughed shortly. ‘You know how much in love I was with him. He was everything a girl can wish for when it comes to her first love. Smart and handsome, and completely unattainable.’ She laughed again, but Minseok did not miss the tone of nostalgia clouding her eyes.

‘I really tried make him notice you back then; I actually thought somebody like you would be a good balance for his obnoxiousness. I guess you were just too good for him.’

‘I still am.’ She smirked. He grinned back. ‘I know he’s already thinking of marrying me.’ She added casually, taking a sip of her coffee that had arrived seconds ago. Black and sugarless, just how she liked it.

Minseok didn’t manage to hide his astonishment at the sentence.

‘What..? How? Has he already talked to you about it? He’s barely had time to come to terms with the whole concept of marriage himself.’

‘Please, of course not. The fax has not arrived yet. As I’m sure that’s his preferable way of a marriage proposal.’ She smiled at the thought but quickly regained her composure. ‘The few weeks I’ve spent with him… Minseok-ah, he’s so easy to read. Not to mention, he hasn’t changed much since I last saw him. His way of thinking and constant striving for excellence is what drew me in, in the first place. He can be incredibly petty but he is also an admirable person, in so many ways.’ Her facial features tightened. ‘When I started this, I merely wanted to know what it felt like to be close to him. I guess I hoped the illusion I had held in my heart for so many years would eventually be shuttered by his brusque and obnoxious attitude.’

‘I’m guessing it did not work out.’ Minseok prompted sympathetically, but also with an amused glint in his eyes. She shook her head, a light smile back on her lips.

‘I wanted to get back at him a little for all the humiliation he had put me through at school. I expected him to resent me and back out of our deal immediately. But the more time I spend with him, the better I understand why he did what he did. In a way, I have got to know the real him only now. He never means to be cruel - he just genuinely doesn’t realise that his words and behaviour can hurt others, probably because he himself feels beyond such matters. His past actions are not on my mind any longer, but if they were, I could not hate him because of what I know about him now.’

‘He does not let people in easily, that’s for sure. I’ve been by his side for so many years, initially because of our parents’ friendship, later because I’ve come to realise that he is a person one can truly rely on. It takes time but once you’re in his life, it’s forever. I think he would be the last person to admit that I’m his friend but it doesn’t change the fact that he would jump into the fire for me. That much I’m certain of.’ Minseok snickered. ‘I think he’s falling in love with you but is taking it in the most painful , oblivious of ways.’

‘He did just tell me I’m making him sick in his stomach.’ Irene shrugged, humour in her eyes. Minseok barked a laugh.

‘He’s jealous.’

‘I did not expect him to be. I expected him to hate me. I was doing everything I could to . But it all escalated so quickly.’

‘What I want to know is whether you are ready to face a relationship with him. Because if you’re not, it’s better if you leave him now. He’s still at that confusing stage where he can hide behind his pride and write you off from his daily routine after a bit of complaining. But if you’re just playing with him, he is going to be really hurt. He will bury the pain and keep it like a thorn in his side, that will wound his flesh every time he as much as turns towards a woman. As his friend, I can’t let you do that. You understand.’

‘I have no intention of hurting him. Teasing him is funny. Playing with his feelings is not at all what I’m after. But you also have to understand that I have to think of myself. I can’t let him in so intimately just based on my rekindled sentiments for him. He has to show me that he sees me as more than just “a reasonable woman who does not happen to embarrass him every chance she gets”.’ She mocked by making a sign of inverted commas in the air. Minseok did not even have to look to know that it was a direct quotation from one of his friend’s many pompous speeches. He had heard it himself too many times.

‘Well, just so you know. From now on, Suho is going to be working really hard to prove it to you.’