3.

‘This is hilarious.’ Minseok said when he was finally done rolling around, laughing his head off. Suho was not impressed. ‘Did you take any pictures?’

‘As a matter of fact, we did. She kept waving around that long stick that she used to take pictures of herself with her phone-‘

‘…That is a one unnaturally long description of a selca stick that you just had there…’

‘ – and she could not even operate it that well, because it kept landing on my head-‘

‘…are you sure it was just a coincidence?’

‘-and after we were done with walking around, we still had to ride the Ferris wheel. It was nauseating.’

‘You are crazy. Any other guy would be over the moon if a girl like Irene Bae were to drag him around and make him go on dates with her. Seriously, she sounds amazing.’

‘You are the crazy one.’ Suho huffed in disdain and got up from the sofa. ‘Why are you even here? You two can play video games somewhere else just as well.’

‘True, but we knew that you would just go to sleep at 9 o’clock like you usually do on Friday nights, and since getting you out is clearly not an option, we came to see you. Male bonding time, you know. We brought beer.’ Sehun touched the six pack standing next to the spacious love seat with his left foot, both of his hands still occupied with a game remote.

‘You know that I don’t enjoy beer.’ Suho grimaced, but sat back down. It was true; he preferred to be alone and he absolutely hated, when his plans were disrupted by unexpected events. However, having those two stick to him like a piece of a spoilt chewing gum had been mostly advantageous to him and so, he had learnt to tolerate them over the years, having realised that either way, they were not going anywhere.

‘It was really just an excuse to get you to tell us about your new hot girlfriend. She’s hot, right?’ Sehun paused the game and sat up straight, leaning closer. Pretty much anything involving attractive ladies immediately had Sehun on his toes.

‘She looks reasonable. I supposed being seen with her is not entirely embarrassing.’ Suho admitted. The two friends high-fived.

‘She’s hot, alright.’ They laughed. Suho really wanted to condemn his two friends for their childish outburst, but he could not entirely shake off his own amusement, either.

‘Suho-yah, you need to take that stick out of your and live a little. You are young and clearly, that girl is after you. Who knows, maybe she actually likes you despite you being… well, you.’ Minseok finished awkwardly.

‘And that’s more than you can say about the majority of females surrounding you. Face it, you turn people away.’ Sehun added.

‘While I acknowledge your words, I must remind you that it is just a business deal between her and I. She owns the shares that she had promised to sell to me and wants my time in return. It’s a transaction.’

‘You’re a complete moron. ‘ Minseok sighed. ‘Business deal or not, you have to step up the game. Think of it this way – it is your first, and at this rate probably the last, close encounter with the opposite . You are a single male,’ Minseok lifted his index finger ‘and she is a single female,‘ he added the index finger of his right palm ‘and you need each other in order to be useful to the future generations.’ He touched both his fingers and made slurping kissing noises. Suho scowled.

‘Minseok’s right, though. ‘Sehun chipped in. ‘As a heir to the company, you will soon be expected to get married and produce an offspring. You said that you had what you called frequent heart palpitations while spending time with Irene. That is good.’

‘Dying of a heart attack is not good.’ Suho denied matter-of-factly, adjusting the glasses on his nose.

‘You’re not dying, my friend, you like her!’

Suho looked at his companion, blinking. He did not seem to comprehend what had just been said. Seated next to him, Minseok wiped his face with both his hands in utter disbelief at his friend’s naivety.

‘I’ve never liked anyone in my life.’ Suho finally replied.

‘You don’t say.’ Minseok muttered and Sehun snickered at the comment.

‘You’ve been spending time with her for the past two weeks and look at you - you don’t complain about it as much as you used to. That’s a good sign. You’re 27 years old, it’s about time that you finally became a man.’ Sehun winked. Suho frowned, failing to recognise the meaning behind the statement. ‘It’s understandable, you’re been starved for so long and here she is, a woman in her prime. It’s only natural.’

‘I’m not starved, I eat frequently and healthily.’

‘You need a woman!’ Minseok shouted in his face so loudly, that Suho nearly fell of the sofa. ‘And you may not encounter another suitable candidate willing to procreate with you, so if numbers and investments are all you understand, think of all the reasons why you should keep her.’

‘You can count on me, I will guide you through the rocky path of a woman’s heart. I’m a professional.’ Sehun added quickly, shaking Suho in excitement. ‘We’ll call it Operation Romance.’

‘I don’t think-‘

‘We’re gonna play it cool for now and attack slyly when the time is right.’

‘I don’t like violence. Also, I don’t think-‘

‘You have to take her on a romantic trip, too.’ Sehun was in his own world already. Minseok nodded vigorously at the man’s every word. ‘I need to see her. We will decide on the strategy to woo her.’

Suddenly, Suho’s phone started ringing and the three screamed at the unexpected sound of reality around them. Suho’s cell fell out of his hands and he barely caught it before it hit the ground.

‘Hello?’

‘It’s me. Let me in, please.’

‘…What?’ The man asked, stupefied.

‘I’m downstairs, but the concierge says that only you can activate the lift to your floor. Do it, please.’ Irene seemed to be in a good mood. Suho, on the contrary, nearly fell of the sofa himself at the prospect of having her going up to his loft.

‘What are you doing? This is my private space. You can’t be here.’

‘Nonsense. I want to see where you live. I came to visit. What’s the matter?’

‘I won’t let you upstairs. I just can’t. I’m sorry.’

‘What are you- Oh, thanks. Your jokes are not funny, by the way. I’ll be right there.’

‘What? I didn’t do any-‘ He heard Irene hung up and he turned around just in time to see Minseok pushing the button on the videophone. He grinned at his friend.

‘I’m dying to meet her.’ He explained, shrugging. Suho turned to Sehun for help but was only met with an identical grin. He sighed hopelessly.

Suho looked around, trying to think of anything that could catch the girl’s attention and result in the destruction of his apartment, but there was no time for that. Not even a minute passed, when he heard his doorbell ring and Sehun was already ushering Irene in.

She looked casual, in fitted denims and a green polo shirt tucked into her trousers, her usual heels to add height. She was holding a big bottle of whiskey.

‘I didn’t know you had company.’ She smiled at the two new faces. ‘I wasn’t aware you have any friends, actually.’ She added, her mischievous smile quickly turning wider.

‘Who would have guessed, huh?’ Sehun grinned back. ‘Sehun, at your service.’ He made a show of hugging her and looking deeply into her eyes. She laughed.

‘You are not my type, honey, but I’m flattered that you even tried.’

‘…and there she goes, crushing my sincere heart…’ Sehun muttered, but didn’t seem in the least offended.

Irene turned and leaned in to briefly hug the other man that had been looking at her with recognition in his eyes.

‘Are you..?’ She quickly interrupted him.

‘Shhhh.’ She whispered into his ear. ‘Let it be our secret for now. Nice to meet you again after so many years.’ They looked at each other and smiled knowingly.

The fact that Irene Bae turned out to be Bae Joohyun, a former classmate of Suho and Minseok, came out as quite a surprise to the latter, but he soon decided that it made things even more interesting for his friend. Thus, Minseok decided to follow the girl’s lead.

For now.

Neither Suho nor Sehun seemed to have noticed the couple’s quick exchange as they already left for the sofa.

‘Aren’t you going to greet me at all?’ Suho froze mid way, caught off guard. Irene was still standing in the same spot, clearly waiting for something. …For me?

‘…Hi.’ He waved awkwardly. She scoffed and ran up to him, hugging him tightly by the neck. Suho stiffened.

When she took off her shoes, she was even shorter than she already seemed to be, and she somehow felt really fragile against him. It did not look like she was going to let him go any time soon, so he patted her back reluctantly. However, the heart palpitations that he so feared kept increasing with every second and he finally managed to slide out of her arms in what seemed almost like a natural manner.

‘Why don’t you sit down?’ He offered and took his own advice, heavily dropping to the couch. She copied him, opting to sit so close that he felt his personal space being invaded and ended up moving to make space. Nonetheless, she moved closer yet again, so he scooted to the left altogether. It didn’t, however, discourage the girl, who continued chasing the man. By the time they reached the edge of the seat, Suho was so freaked out that he quickly stood up and relocated to the armchair.

Irene winked at his two friends, who immediately grinned back at her.

‘We did not have a dat- an appointment today.’ Suho corrected himself at the last moment. ‘I said I would call as usual, why are you here?’ He frowned.

‘I was bored at home. When your girlfriend is bored, you should do something to entertain her.’ She said matter-of-factly, making Suho think that it was somehow socially expected of a boyfriend to read his partner’s mind, when clearly, it was an absurd assumption.

Any excuse that he might have come up with was, however, unnecessary, because Irene had already found a solution to her own problem.

‘I thought of something that we could do together to get to know each other even better.’

‘You had expressed such desire before so I gave you my written profile. Haven’t you read it?’ Suho’s frown turned even deeper.

‘You gave her… your CV?’ Sehun was now literally rolling on the ground, failing to contain his laughter.

‘Is there a better way to get to know a person? Curriculum Vitae is a condensed file and a very efficient way of analysing somebody’s personality and life achievements.’

‘We are socialising, not applying for Yonsei here.’ Minseok pointed out. ‘Irene brought whiskey. I think you know what that means.’

‘I’ll be here, watching your livers work overtime tonight.’ Suho nodded, feeling bored and frustrated. He should already be in bed, entering his REM phase.

‘No. It’s a drinking game that is meant for you two to become closer.’ Sehun replied impatiently, making a side–pointing move with his head towards Irene. Suho, however, looked as clueless as ever.

‘Well, I wasn’t expecting company, but let’s all have fun tonight. Coaxing even one positive word from your friend always proves to be a difficult task. Maybe you can help me.’ She smiled at the two men and they needed no further encouragement, as they pushed away the table and sat down on the carpet. Irene slid down from her seat as well.

Suho felt his OCD kicking in. Nobody had ever moved that coffee table before. The three of them looked at him expectantly.

‘I don’t think it’s a good idea, I don’t like sitting on the- ahh!’ He felt Irene grabbing his hand and he fell down on his gracelessly.

‘Shut up and drink with us.’ She said good-naturally and he found it weird how he was more embarrassed for his own behaviour, than he was mad at her for hers.

‘So what’s your game about?’ Minseok asked, when he distributed four shot glasses.

‘Oh, it’s really simple. We take turns in naming an activity. If anyone has done it before, they take a shot. It might be more interesting with you guys around, though. I have a feeling that Suho has led a really boring life.’ Irene winked at her boyfriend, who turned even redder than he already was.

‘Why don’t we start with you, Suho?’

‘I have to go first? What am I supposed to say?’ He looked confused but somewhat adorable, at least to Irene. The other two were doing a really bad job at not openly laughing at him.

‘Think of something you have done, a character trait, anything.’

‘Well… ok, then. I… own a company.’ Irene and Minseok drank their fills. Sehun motioned at Suho.

‘Drink, my friend. You drink for every truth.’ So Suho did, but the brown liquid immediately made his throat ache and his legs weaken. He coughed.

‘That was super boring.’ Minseok commented. ‘My turn. I’ve had in a car.’ Sehun drunk his portion. Minseok laughed. ‘Why am I not even surprised?’ Sehun shrugged and grinned at him.

‘I still keep the stuffed toy that I liked as a kid.’ Minseok drank and  Suho reluctantly followed. Irene laughed.

‘I want to see it.’ She turned to him.

‘Mr. Sniffles is sacred.’ He shook his head.

‘I’ve head feelings for somebody that I was not supposed to.’ Irene finally said and took a shot.

It soon became apparent, why Suho rarely enjoyed anything stronger than a glass of wine – he simply could not hold his liquor well. Due to the nature of the questions asked – and the strategy his two friends came up with in order to get him drunk – he drank more often than he did not. At present, he was already out of his mind, taking off his sweater and ing the two first buttons from his shirt. He was giggling to himself, despite the room being mostly silent.

‘I’ve once told my employee to correct an excel sheet twenty times in a row!’ Minseok screamed and started laughing, falling backwards. It was past 3 o’clock and Sehun was already snoring softly on the carpet.

Suho continued giggling, as he took the shot that he definitely deserved to take.

Irene was sitting motionlessly next to him, shoulder to shoulder. She’d long hit her limit, but she was still there, observing the antics of the men present.

Soon, both Minseok and Sehun had fallen asleep on the floor and only Suho remained, against all odds.

‘Hey, Suho, did you really not like your name? Junmyeon? I really liked that name. I kept writing it all over my geography notebook…’ She mumbled. He slugged against her.

‘It sounds… stupid. Suho is a distinguished name fit for a leader.’

‘I liked it, though.’ She just repeated, sinking in an alcohol-induced disappointment.

‘Your name is not Irene, either.’ He observed, his eyes still on his own palm in front of him. He had five fingers. It was fascinating. Humans had ten fingers, how had he not realised this before..?

‘I guess I also needed a fresh start.’ She admitted, much sober than he was. They sat in a amicable silence for some time, when Suho suddenly called her.

‘Hey, Irene.’ She turned to look at him and their faces turned out to be only centimetres away. She held her breath, feeling that for a change, it was Suho who was completely ignoring the concept of a personal space. ‘I have kissed a person that I had a business relationship with.’ He said.

She realised only a moment after that he meant the sentence to be part of the game that they were still playing.

‘I have not.’ She admitted. Without a second to spare, she felt Suho lean decisively and place his lips on hers. He tried to move them, but the angle proved so awkward that their connection lasted mere seconds and he fell over. In the last desperate attempt, he reached for a bottle of wine that they had opened after having drunk all the whiskey, and took a sip.

‘I guess that counts.’ He commented more to himself and passed out immediately after.

xxx

‘You left me with her. When I woke up, you two were gone.’ Suho accused the moment Minseok picked up his phone. The latter grunted into the receiver - it was too early to deal with his friend’s outrage. ‘Her saliva was all over my shoulder.’ Suho added, as if that added weight to the situation.

‘How’s your heart?’ Minseok asked instead. There were more important matters to discuss, after all.

‘Irene and I accidentally locked lips last night and it had been beating fast ever since.’ Suho admitted. Minseok grunted again.

‘Wonderf- Wait, what? You kissed her? You kissed her and your heart was beating really fast?’ Minseok sat up on his bed abruptly, despite the massive hangover still reigning over his body.

‘I suppose so. Am I dying? Just tell me. I can take it.’

‘You idiot, you have a crush on Irene and you just kissed her. Wait until I call Sehun. Operation Romance is so on!’