God has given you one face, and you make yourself another 

~William Shakespeare

During the semester break of my first high school year, Jung Yong Hwa moved out of Seoul, leaving my feelings unconveyed. Since then, 3 years have passed. He still existed within a corner of my heart. And then, I would feel this way..

I want to go back to that time..

"... so, he just asked me to date him for fun. Isn't that crazy?! Yah, Seohyun, are you listening to me?" Jiyeon talked non stop for a while when I unconciously drifted my thoughts, again, to him.

"N-ne? Ah. Yes, Jiyeon, I heard you. And you should not date for fun, you know. It's not appropriate," I faked a laugh.

"As expected of Seohyunnie, the one who is not interested in any of the guys in this campus," Hara teased me and laughed.

Jiyeon and Hara was my current group. I felt a little bit off being with them but it wasn't harming me in any way so it's fine.

"Oh right, thanks for your muffler Seohyun," Jiyeon gave me my muffler back, which I pushed to my already ship-wrecked backpack. They laughed looking at my action.

"Seriously, Seohyunnie, you should be more organized. you are a lady, you know?" Hara commented on my appearance.

My face has barely any make up. I dyed my hair, keeping it long as I remembered he once said he liked my long hair, only to leave it straight or sometimes curl it if I was in the mood. I never wore any girly clothes, and prefer to go with sneakers than high heels.

"Ahahaha.. I just prefer to be this way. It's more comfortable for me," I laughed awkwardly

Even I know that, Jiyeon, Hara. But I have no other options.

"Well, at least Seohyun is better than that girl," Hara said mockingly.

"Yea, right? Seriously, she used her aegyo to attract those guys. She always acts cute whenever the guys are around and ignored us," Jiyeon agreed with Hara.

Yeah, more like YOU ignored her.

The subject of the conversation, Sulli, looked like she was invited to lunch with some guys but she politely rejected them. True, she was cute, but I don't think she meant to be ignored. The other girls were just jealous of her. After all, just look at her, who wouldn't think she was cute? That fair skin, cute outfits, timid smile..

For her to endure such remarks, I really think she had a strong heart. I, above all, knew exactly how she felt and how hard it was for her.

Flashback

It was my second year in high school. As usual I hang aroung Eun Bi and others. It wasn't long before the rumor spread.

"Hey, look at her," I heard some guys gossiping about me. At first I ignored it but it wasn't getting any better.

"Yeah, Seo Joo Hyun. So pretty, right?"

"I think she is really cute and feminine. She is so kind to everyone."

"She is like a dream girl."

"Yeah, but I think she is hard to approach."

"Isn't that making it more interesting?"

"She is totally my type!"

"Hey girls, you should learn from Joo Hyun! Look at how feminine she is!"

And after that, the girls started to avoid me.

"She is just so annoying!" I heard one girl talking about me.

"Yeah, right, who is she anyway? She is acting like she is a queen."

"I bet what she said about her hating boys is just a facade"

"Right? After all she acts cute in front of guys.."

"I hate her."

And not long after, even my groups left me. "Sorry, Joo Hyun. It's not like we hated you or anything." was all they said to me.

I was all alone. I endured it until the end of my third year. It was painful. The only thing that calming my mind was him. The memories of him.

....

And that was why I decided to change myself. Being the ignorant and unattractive person that I was.

I reset myself. I put a persona, Seohyun, not the old Seo Joo Hyun. I wore boyish clothes, jeans, sneakers. I didn't put much make up like any other girls. I let my bags unorganized. I bought a lot of bread during lunch, just to show the guys how unattractive I was. And yes, so far so good.

"Jung Il Woo! I finished my papers!" one of the students shouted, making me snap back to reality hearing the words 'Jung'. I automatically looked at the person.

"Omo, Seohyun. I know that you are not attracted to any guys here, but it seems that you react differently towards Jung Il Woo seonsaengnim~~" Jiyeon noticed me.

"E-Eh?? Anieyo. I just reacted automatically. Maybe because he has the same surname with my first love," I answered.

"Omo, uri Seohyunnie had fallen in love before?" Hara asked excitedly. I nodded. "What kind of person is he?"

"Well.. He wasn't that tall.. and quite reserved.. I think?"

"What about his facial features? Does he has any resemblance to anyone?" Now Jiyeon also joined in the conversation.

Now that I think about it.. Jung Il Woo seonsaengnim has the same aura as him... Probably just my imagination, right? It might be because I just think of Jung Yong oppa..

"Ung.. well.." I couldn't really answer their question.

"Hey, hey, don't you think that Seohyun is cute? She is so pretty right?" I startled hearing those words from some random guy that we passed through. Jiyeon and Hara also stopped and looked at me. I knew that their facial expression changed. I saw a bit of jealousy in their eyes. So I guessed, I just had to use my ultimate move. I started to eat my bread hurriedly. I saw the boys was surprised and left immediately.

"Hey, Seohyun, don't you hear those guys just now? I think if you tried to be more feminine, you'll be more popular, you know?" Hara told me.

"Eyy~ no way," I answered jokingly. "Besides, I have you guys, who cares about boy.. Ugh" I bumped into someone and dropped by bread. The guy's refex was better than mine, he catched my bread before it fell to the floor.

Nice catch!

"Thankyou!" I bowed without looking at his face.

He passed through me and I faintly hear him said, "You'll choke if you eat that fast, you know," along with the familiar chuckle.

Wait.

All of a sudden I saw memories flashes through my mind.

It was different, so why did I think of him? His voice is different, even his back is different.

But, just a little, I want to make sure whether it was him or not.

I looked back to his direction, only to find him gone.

"Seohyun? are you okay?" Jiyeon asked me.

I don't want to lose him again. Not this time.

"Sorry, Jiyeon, Hara, please go back without me first!" I ran after him.

Where is he?

I ran through the hallway hoping to catch up with him.

And I saw him, walking out of the door, going to the other building.

"Ju.." I tried calling him

"Kim Yong Hwa!" someone calling behind me. He turned his back and I saw his face. I thought I saw him smiling at me, but he went away with the other guy.

Dugeun.. Dugeun..

Eh? Kim?

Ah, it must be my imagination. He is in Busan, right? Maybe he just have a similar face and name. 

They have a different surname, after all. He even have piercing!

"Aigoo, lucky I didn't called out to him," I sighed in relief. I turned around and saw Sulli eating alone.

"Ah, Sulli-sshi. Isn't it cold eating out here? Why don't you eat in the cafetaria instead?" I approached her.

"Today is quite warm so it's fine sitting here. Thank you, Seohyun-sshi!" She smiled happily answering my question.

"Well.. If you say so. But, please take these heat packs. I have a lot so it's okay," I gave her my heat packs.

We chatted for a while. I was sympathetic towards her, knowing fully well what she went through. Recalling my past as I touched her cute tamama keychain.

"Ah, well, I better go back first, okay? Jiyeon and Hara are waiting for me. Enjoy you lunch, Sulli-sshi!" I waved at her and she flashed her smile to me.

I searched for Jiyeon and Hara at my campus. I asked around and someone told me they were in the toilet.

"Hara, about Seohyun.. It's actually because she was so tomboy-ish that she can hang around us, right?" Jiyeon asked Hara. The question startled me who accidentaly eavesdrop, in a way, their conversation.

"Right! I can't even imagine if she started to act all girly in front of us. I might puke!" Hara laughed.

I knew it. It was right to be this way. At least they will stay as my friend.

"Hey, if you're done, can you please step aside? You are blocking the door, you know," I heard someone else talking and Jiyeon and Hara hurriedly went outside.

"Right! Sorry, Tiffany-sshi... Seohyun?!" Jiyeon realized my presence. "Could you be.. hearing what we said just now?"

I laughed at the question. "Hahaha, it's okay Jiyeon, it's not like I can become feminine anyway."

"Ahaha, right. That's what we like about you!" Hara trying to cheer up the atmosphere before Tiffany-sshi went out of the toilet and looking at us for while before going off her own.

Right, Tiffany-sshi. She is also a lone wolf.

"She is scary, right, Seohyunnie?" Jiyeon asked me

"She has an intimidating presence, huh?" Hara also commented on her.

"Ne.." was the only answer I could manage to came up with.

***

I went home from my campus, listening to my favourite band, CNBLUE, song, Still in Love, while getting immersed in my own thinking.

That's when I noticed him, Kim Yong Hwa, walking in the same direction as me.

"Ah.." I unconciously said. He looked back at me.

What should I do? What should I do? Pabo Seo Joo Hyun, I shouldn't have said anything. Now he must've think I'm a creep.

"I.. It's not like I followed you or anyhting, okay! My house is in the same direction!" I defended myself before he could accuse me of anything

"..." He just stared blankly at me and continued his walk.

Huh? Wait a minute. He lives in the same area.. could it be..?

He stopped in a sudden, standing in front of the old familiar bus stop that wasn't used anymore. He sat there quietly and I followed him, curious about my own conclusion.

This was where we took shelter together..

"A.. are you Jung Yong Hwa?" I asked, unsure about what I did.

"... I'm Kim Yong Hwa, though" he answered like there is nothing wrong.

"Ah.. Ahaha, right. I'm sorry, I think I've mistaken you for someone else," I bowed at him and turned my back. That's when I literally get a shock.

"It's suddenly pouring, huh?"

It was the same line. The same with what he said to me three years ago.

I felt a rush of emotion inside me, I looked back at him and saw him smiling at me.

"I.. Is it really you, Jung Yong oppa?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yes, it's me. But I'm not a Jung anymore. I'm Kim Yong Hwa now," he smiled while looking up. "My parents filed a divorce, so I changed my name. I don't want to be a Jung anymore."

His voice, his back, even his name are different. But it is him. He is in front of me now.

The very first guy that I liked...

"But, still, you really are oblivious towards your surroundings, huh? I was wondering when you'll start noticing me but you didn't until today. I found that quite amusing though," he smiled calmly.

Huh?

"I noticed you even though you've changed so much. I originally thought that you will become more feminine and soft-spoken though. But this you is also interesting," he continued.

"Jung Yong oppa.. You should have just called me then! You've also changed a lot! Look at you, you even have that piercings on your ears" I defended myself.

"I told you I'm no longer a Jung now. It's Kim," He emphazised the last word.

I was utterly shocked with his behaviour. Never did I imagined he would changed so much in a mere three years.

"Well, for now, shall we have a reunion hug?" he asked me.

And my jaw dropped.

"No way, oppa! I don't want such a thing! What's wrong with you?!"

He chuckled,"well, it's true, you've always detests guys even back in the high school, right? It seems that it's still the same now."

It made me quiet. It made me remembered his hurting face when I told that to Ji Hoo-sshi.

"Yeah, it's true.." I should tell him the truth now "But you're different, oppa. Only you are different."

I felt my voice tremble, as I felt like it was just like the good old days.

"Eh..?" I saw his face blushed a bit. "Is that so?" He looks flustered. "I used to like you too"

And his sudden confession make me feel happy inside.

We can go back, right? We can continue from that time...

"But we can no longer go back, right?" and those words shattered my dreams.

"We are totally a different person from back then. I am different, and you, too, are different. That was just a reminisce of our past." He looked at me with that stares I've never seen from him. I saw a different emotion. I saw pain, anger, sadness. I saw them even if he was smiling to me. It was such a cold hearted word.

I guess this is it. He is telling me to forget all about us, right?

I sat down, unable to hold it anymore, a tear escapes my eyes.

"Don't cry, pabo. It was annoying, you know, seeing a girl crying," He ruffled my hair before he walked away. "See you."

After he left, I can't even hold it in anymore. I cried my heart out, alone.

Note:

Please don't kill me for making Yong so mean to Hyun!! Haha.

Sorry, I'm not even sure if there is such thing as changing your surname in Korea but, just went along with it ^^"

Thank you for subscribing to this story! Hahaha.

I ended up posting one more chapter of this story. But now I got to finish my assignments first, so.. see you tomorrow!