“Love is when you look into someone’s eyes and see their hearts.” –Jill Petty

The last month of spring came by. Everything was doing great for the first week. We continued what we were doing for the past month since the day that I wooed her. But the best experienced of all was when we went boating. I saw amazement in Jessica’s eyes, though she was a bit trembling for the fist time she rode it. I still remembered her words when we’re about to step in.

“Just hold me, Donghae. I’m afraid that I might fall off.” She said, her voice was a little shaky.

I didn’t know she was so afraid. So, what I did was holding her until we stepped out of the boat. I heard her inhaling a sighed of relief. Maybe she was thankful that she didn’t fell off the boat.

While we were walking side by side, enjoying the last month of spring, I was in a deep thought while she was talking about I-don’t-know. I couldn’t remember what she was talking that time because I was busy thinking of something inside my head.

“Donghae?” she took my attention by waving her hand in front of my face.

I returned to reality after she did it. “Yes?” I said, didn’t know what to do.

“Are you listening to me?” she queried, her face lost vitality.

“Y—yeah.” I answered stuttering.

“Really? What did I say?” she asked, checking if I was saying the truth.

“Uhm…hmm…”

“See? You’re not listening. Is there something bothering you?” she asked again while she stopped walking.

“I’m just thinking of something. In time, you’ll know.” I replied.

She just nodded and we continued walking.

At that time, I was thinking if I should or not confess to her. Yes, I was wooing her for a couple months but I never tried saying what I really felt inside for her. I never revealed my whole heart to her. I was busily doing stuffs, but what’s it for?

I thought to confess to her before summer season began. But I didn’t know how.

“Jessica?”

“Yes?”

“I’m wooing you for months and so, do you think of going into another level?” I said, feeling a bit shy.

She stopped and sat in a bench under a cherry blossom tree. She eyed me until I took a seat on the other end of the bench.

“I’m not thinking of it at all, not until today that you asked me.” She said as she laid her hands on her lap and looked into the distance.

“Honestly, I didn’t know how to ask you about certain things like this. It’s because I never experienced once before.” I said as I gazed at her while she was still looking away.

“Just feel your heart and every word will just come out of your mouth.”

“I don’t get what you mean.” I said with a furrowed forehead.

“You’ll get what I mean once you’re in that moment.” She said as she turned her eyes to me and smiled.

I didn’t know what she was talking about. So, I continued pondering on it until we parted ways that day. The darkness came and engulfed the surrounding. I was alone in my room, thinking of what she said to me. Sometimes, I have this trouble in understanding someone’s deeper thought. I was confused that’s why I ran to my parents’ room, asked for Mom’s advice.

“Mom, are you there?” I yelled softly as I knocked on the door.

“Yes, Son. Come in.” Mom answered.

When I entered the room, Mom was sitting in a chair, facing the windowpane. She was knitting an I-don’t-know item.

“Can I disturb you for awhile, Mom?” I asked, standing a few inches away from her.

“Of course.”

“I just wanted to clear some things in my head before hitting the bed tonight.” I said, looking our reflections.

“What’s troubling you?” Mom queried as she placed the knitting materials in the basket on the floor.

“I’m planning to confess what I truly feel for Jessica, Mom, but I didn’t know how to start.”

“All you have to do is to reveal what’s inside you. Say it naturally with all your heart and everything will just come out.” Mom said, placing her hand above her chest. It seemed like she was feeling her heart beats.

“You and Jessica says the same, but I don’t get what you really mean.” I said, looking at Mom still looking for answers.

“I mean, let your heart speaks for you. Let your heart’s desires reign and not your mind.” Mom said, trying to make it clear to me. And thanks God that I got what she meant.

“Okay. I get it Mom. Does it need to be ostentatious? Like what I saw in television, Mom?” I queried, kneeling beside Mom’s chair where she was sitting.

“You don’t have to make such day ostentatious, Son. Just make it simply and real. A dinner with candle light is way too romantic for us girls. What matters most is what’s inside your heart.” Mom said as she gently pinched my nose.

“All right! I understand Mom. Thank you.”

“You’re always welcome.” Mom said, ruffling my hair.

I stood up and about to leave the room when Mom called my name. “Donghae” she said softly.

I turned around to face Mom again. She was smiling, her eyes were starry. “Yes, Mom?” I asked.

“Be yourself.” Mom simply said.

I nodded and left the room. After the conversation I was totally relieved. I knew what I have to do.

I was planning to confess to Jessica the next day, but when I arrived into their house, she wasn’t there. Her Mom told me that she was out of the country. Jessica wanted to be alone and breathe some fresh air, that’s why she left.

“Why she did not tell me?” I said as I sat down the couch.

“She knew you will accompany her and she did not want to bother you at work, that’s why she left without bidding goodbye to you.” Her Mom said, handing me a cup of hot green tea.

I wanted to know where she was, but she instructed her mother not to tell anyone even me. I felt like she didn’t want me to be around.

“When she will come back?” I said, as I grip the cup and took a sip.

“Maybe she will be here at the end of the month.”

That was the last question I asked because Aunt was in a rush. I didn’t have the time to ask her where she was going to.

Days passed me by slowly like ticking clock.

I felt alone like I did before. The feeling of missing her was the craziest feeling I’ve ever felt. It was like I was counting the countless stars above the sky. Days seemed like night as I stayed for long hours in work just to entertain myself and forget her for awhile. But when the night came in, her thoughts started to occupy my mind for long hours like I was in work. I didn’t get enough sleep.

Second week of spring came.

Third week of spring came.

And the last week of spring came.

There was no Jessica. I was thinking if she has any plans to return her. And though I was waiting without assurance I was still hoping and praying for her to come back. The seed of hope inside me was undying.

“I’m ready to say what’s inside my heart. I’m ready to say that I want to take care of you and love you for a lifetime. But you’re not here to listen to my shouting heart. I love you. I love you, Jessica.” That was all I could whisper in the air, hoping it would reach her wherever she was.

I bid goodbye to spring

Saying hi alone to summer

Missing you.

>..comments are very much welcome and appreciated..<

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A/N: hello there my lovely subcribers! another added chapter for this story. are y'all wondering where is Jessica? Is she really out of the country? or somewhere in Seoul?

it'll be revealed on the next chapter. so, keep your track on this story.

by the way, follow me on twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/SweetMariangela (if you want a follow back, just mention or PM me, okay?)