Chapter 2

edelweiss

Jungkook anxiously bit his lower lip, putting a piece of paper with a sentence that couldn’t be seen in his pocket.

“I’ll stop, if you, Jeon Jungkook, are going to leave my side like you said.”

Taehyung’s words were rather harsh, yet meaningful. He looked at his best friend, Jungkook, with an aching stare. Not much happened in awhile.

An uncomfortable tear of Jungkook’s slid down his so-called strawberry flavored cheek. It felt somewhat painful to stay by Kim Taehyung’s side. Taehyung was awkwardly waiting for a response that could change his whole fed-up fate. At least now, he thought there was a little bit of possibility in there. Jungkook, on the other hand, was awfully at a loss for words. Just the thought of having to react made him fairly itchy. He simply wanted to run away with no one’s hand in his. He just wanted it to end; now and not later or earlier. Today he just didn’t feel like getting close to anyone but himself. To say goodbye was harder than it seemed, though. Harder than in movies.

“Jungkook,” without further ado, Taehyung wanted an answer to his puzzle that lasted longer than it was supposed to. “You’re really leaving, aren’t you?”

“Stop it!” Jungkook approximately sounded like someone whom brainlessly had been struggling for his whole life. He hadn’t, though. Taehyung used to know that. Taehyung used to say that he knew everything about his best friend. That they hid nothing between each other. Not even a single secret was hidden.

“Just—” he took a deep breath, as his somewhat heart shaped nostrils widened.

“—Just give me a day.”

“Really? Really, Jungkook?” Taehyung was whining all of a sudden. “Will you then stop this act?!”

Hoseok alternatively and impatiently watched them from behind. His slim, feeble thighs could barely survive the noisy situation. At the same time, he couldn’t do anything but look at the way things had turned out. He couldn’t do anything but wait for a solution that’d come by itself. He wasn’t even sure of what they were talking about. He hadn’t been through the same kind of pain, anyway.

Jungkook unexpectedly nodded. Down his cheeks were crystal clear tears that showed the hardships he had been through. Just by his messy, unforgettable strands of hair, you could see how much he had suffered. How much he had gone back and forth. Taehyung didn’t seem to notice that, though. He used to be too selfish to.

“Then—” After quite a long amount of time, Taehyung eventually decided to finish his mired favor. To let him go for a day; but only a day. Not any longer.

“Then go.” Jungkook then picked up his bag by packing it with several memories, and simply left without any trace of evidence that proved the fact that he was getting over his best friend. Fortunately and unfortunately, there were good and bad things about it. Taehyung scarcely believed his own eyes — words. Had he really just ruined the everlasting friendship between two men who used to be one together? Had he, perhaps, turned the joy into sorrow? Was this really the end?

Although he had so many terrifying thoughts in mind, he thought it was impossible:

That Jungkook wasn’t the kind of person to leave his side. That he always gave his word and never let go. That he, Jeon Jungkook, had promised to stay as Kim Taehyung’s best friend. He just had to have some time by himself to turn the things into normal again. As he said once:

He didn’t want to see his best friend — Kim Taehyung — like yesterday nor like today. It would probably be another whole new story if Taehyung continued like this, though. If Taehyung was too naive to let go.

After a minute of Jungkook’s disappearance, Taehyung already began to worry. Hoseok was speechless, not knowing what to do to make him stop. To make Jeon Jungkook disappear from Kim Taehyung’s mind. Taehyung’s expressions and emotions were even affecting him whom absolutely knew nothing about Jungkook. He hadn’t even known the fact that he was living in a tent, so how could he possibly understand? How could he possibly shed the same tears as Taehyung? How could he possibly have the same scars and feel the same pain? It was not possible; it was impossible.

Without any words, Taehyung simply left Hoseok behind in the rain that had appeared out of nowhere.

Taehyung weakly stood up, didn’t even brush the dust off his clothes, nor did he look back at him with those powerless eyes of his that he, proudly, was ashamed of.

With Hoseok behind his back, he went out into the crying weather that neither accepted a situation like this. Even the rain thought it was unacceptable. Even the rain was crying. The rain was shedding more tears compared to Taehyung, though, but it didn’t mean anything. Kim Taehyung — together with Jeon Jungkook — was the one who was suffering the most at the moment. They couldn’t and shouldn’t be compared to anyone on the Earth.

He looked up, then down. Thoughts went through his dumbfounded mind. He suddenly closed his wet eyes, thinking it was all a dream — imagination. As he’d open his eyes, he’d face a bright sky on a usual day underneath the cherry blossoms. It wasn’t like that, though. It was reality.

Hoseok came out behind him. He stared at him for a second. Although Taehyung wanted peace, Hoseok turned that into a chat:

‘Hello, how are you?’ It turned out to be a very usual conversation. At first he thought it was a conversation he could’ve had with every student at school, but it ended up being a conversation with Hoseok only. It couldn’t be anyone else but him.

“Taehyung,” he took a step forward, grabbing Taehyung’s arm as Taehyung slowly tried to walk away. Taehyung still didn’t look at him — not even once. Hoseok bitterly continued. “I don’t know you even a little, but still.” He was right. They only knew each other’s name that day. Nothing more than that.

Taehyung turned around, drying the tears that almost slid down his cheeks with his sleeve.

“Still what?” His words were so cold. Much more different than from when he talked to Jungkook. It seemed like he had turned into the Taehyung he used to be before Jungkook’s arrival. The Taehyung whom nearly hated everyone but his close friends. The Taehyung who wasn’t afraid of using dangerous words towards his enemies. When he talked to Jungkook, on the other hand, he only used emotional words. Words that were fluttering, lovely, sad, angsty, happy, cheerful and so on. The list of adjectives that described their conversations wouldn’t ever end.

“Can’t you just give me a small chance?” A gentle wind changed Hoseok’s hairstyle completely. From being all wet and soaked up to quite straight and dry. His small, gorgeous lips seemed to say those words perfectly. He was being totally honest. “I guess I just…” he smiled as his cheeks became bigger and redder. He wasn’t the type of guy to blush, though. He looked like someone who’d joke all the time. Every day, every hour, every minute and second.

“I guess I just want to be your friend.”

Taehyung forgot Jungkook for a second without noticing. Just Hoseok’s way of using words — his way of smiling, talking — filled Taehyung with thoughts for a little while. His honesty was surprisingly different from other guys. Fortunately, he wasn’t lying to, eventually, meet the lies, himself, too. Fortunately, he just wanted to be realistic without persuading anyone. At least he knew that lies would hurt in the end.

Yet, Taehyung still had some kind of enormous Demon inside of him. Unfortunately.

“There’s nothing called Friendship anymore. Eventually… eventually we’ll just end up as enemies behind each other’s back, so why even try? There’s no need to feel happiness for a short amount of time, when we’re, afterwards, going to feel the reality we’re living in for the rest of our lives, anyway.”

Hoseok’s expression on his face changed. He was quite surprised with the answer that he had gotten back. It wasn’t something he had expected even a little. Perhaps, he thought that Taehyung would talk the same way he talked to Jungkook. Perhaps, he thought Taehyung wasn’t that bad of a guy.

He shortly thought of an answer. Got it.

“Yeah,” he shrugged. “When you don’t believe in it, there really is no chance.” His voice sounded so cold because of Taehyung’s unfriendliness. He probably wanted Taehyung to feel the same pain as him. That was how it was getting rejected. If you rejected someone, you’d get rejected, too, so why even be so stupid and let those forbidden words out? You’d just regret it.

Taehyung then stared at him. Sweat slid down his fists as if he was having a cold.

“Well, whether the answer would be a yes or a no, I don’t have time for this stupidity.” He turned the opposite way of Hoseok’s destination. A bit of shame could be felt in his somewhat unexpected, surprising words. Because of Hoseok’s way of ruining his mad confidence, it was like he was scared of dumping him by saying the same thing over and over: There’s no need to feel happiness. However, he stayed away from his complaints. He stayed away from any more forbidden words.

“You really only care about him.” Hoseok raised his voice, as Taehyung took a step forward but stopped. “Just like he said.”

Taehyung wanted to go, but couldn’t bare those kind of insults. He thought Hoseok was wrong. That he, Taehyung, was the guy everyone liked. He thought Hoseok was being too naive, expecting him to be obsessed with his best friend. To him, it was wrong to have such thoughts about him — it was disrespectful, too.

He took another step, thinking if he should say anything back.

“Yeah, I probably do.”

He suddenly didn’t care about the fact that he had sounded selfish. He didn’t care if Hoseok was going to make it even worse. He just wanted to wait for the tomorrow where his best friend would come back. The day where they’d reunite as one. His only wish was just for Jung Hoseok’s existence to disappear already.

He took the last — the most difficult — step, as he continued to instantly walk afterwards. Hoseok stayed. He didn’t even look back at Taehyung. It was weird, though. That he had a soft, nice face, but was the sort of person to use harsh words. It was like it was all a lie. That he wasn’t being like this on purpose. Jungkook wouldn’t ever have a Demon-like friend like this or would he? It couldn’t be. Was it, perhaps, just a big misunderstanding? Was it, perhaps, just their foolish minds that didn’t get today’s reality? It had to be. It couldn’t be anything else. What if it was because of Kim Taehyung? What if Hoseok wasn’t trying to ruin the friendship of Jeon Jungkook & Kim Taehyung?

‘Goodbye.’

Today, as well, was a day on the dark streets in Incheon. It had been thirty-five minutes already. Taehyung couldn’t take the distance anymore. It was too difficult. It’d be even harder when everything occurred outside. Especially when it was cold, wet and dark.

He made an airplane out of paper with his bare hands. Then sent it into Hoseok’s embrace. He was sitting several meters away, on the opposite side of the street, not wanting to leave Taehyung all alone. He obviously thought that Kim Taehyung would go home soon. He thought that he’d sleep well. That he’d eat a