Taemin's point of view

Why? Why did I just kiss her? She must think I'm a total jerk to my girlfriend now. But the thing is, I'm not sure if I love Sophie anymore. Well, yes, I did once fall in love with her, but I'm not sure if my feelings towards her are still the same as they were before I left. I have always loved Rosie. Even as a friend I've always loved her. I felt like I needed to protect her from the very beginning. 

Leaving to join the army wasn't the best way to make her happy, but I've always wanted to serve our country. I felt like it's a duty of mine. Well now, everything is over. I'm home now and I can continue to live my life like I did before. 

Anyway, I strolled home, feeling tired from all the ice skating. I had so much fun with Rosie. I really missed these times. Well now we will have a lot more of them. I'm not sure if I took things too far when I   kissed her. I'm really worried of what she might think of me now. I think I'm going to take things more steady with her. Who am I kidding: she will never fall in love with me like I have with her! That's  even ridiculous to think about. 

I don't even understand why I love her. She is my best friend. She is nothing more, nothing less. Or at least it should be like that.  

Well, I should stop thinking about this now. I'm near Sophie's apartment and I think I'll check up on her, see how she's doing. I didn't really tell Rosie the full story of what happened when I visited Sophie. 

Just after I met Rosie I went to Sophie's apartment. I knocked on her door, and when she opened it she was only wearing underwear, her face was covered in heavy makeup, and there were lit candles all over the place with rose petals scattered on the floor. When she first saw me her expression was shocked, like she was expecting someone else. I questioned her about it after I hugged her and she said that it was because she new I was coming. 

That got me very curious because, first of all, she knows I'm Roman Catholic and Roman Catholics believe in marriage before . She knows I would never disobey my religion. And second of all, how did she know I was coming? I didn't tell anyone that I would be coming home. So that got me wondering, how did she know? 

Something very suspicious is happening, and I actually think that she might be cheating on me. I think I'm going to do a little bit more investigating now. She told me not to come, but I have to get some answers from her.

I walk up the stairs to Sophie's apartment and knock on her door once again. She opened up, but this time, it was a guy. The guy looked quite old, at least 40 and you could clearly see that lipstick has been smeared down his neck and slightly around his mouth. He was only wearing boxers. That was enough to send me off like a bomb. 

"How may I help you?" The old guy asked.

"Is Sophie home?" I asked in a sharp tone.

"Yeah, why?"

"May I speak to her?"

"Who are you?"

"Oh, just her boyfriend," the man's expression turned blank.

"She has a boyfriend?"

''Yes she does, and who are you may I ask?"

"I think I'm going to leave now..." the old guy looked frightened, and actually he should be. He tried to walk past me down the stairs but I grabbed his neck and held him to the wall.

"I said, who are you?" I asked again, furious.

"I'm one of her clients,"

"What clients?" Just then I saw Sophie running out of the bedroom half . 

"What's going on here!" She screamed.

"I would like to ask the same question," I said. 

So she was cheating on me. I knew it. I just knew it! It all made sense. I didn't even have to ask her the questions I was wondering from before. It just all added up.

"Well, you see," she unsteady tried to explain. I could see she was trying to make something up but she just couldn't. She didn't have to explain anything. Everything was really easy to work out, even for a stupid person.

"So basically, while I was gone at WAR, for 2 whole years you start a ing ion service?!"

"It's not what it looks like.."

"I think it's exactly what it looks like!"

"But Taemin..."

"Don't even say anything anymore! WERE DONE!" I shouted and exited the apartment.

How could she do this to me! And why would she? Was I really a that bad boyfriend for her? I really don't understand what I did wrong to deserve this. 

I headed back to my own apartment. It has been a long and dramatic day that I couldn't take the pressure anymore. I took out a bottle of red whine and started gulping it down my dry throat. Finally, when I finished drinking the whole bottle, I fell asleep on the couch in the living room.

I dreamt about Rosie and Sophie running down a battle field. I had to choose which one to save. A different man saved Sophie and while I was trying to decide all that time, Rosie got killed. It was a real nightmare. 

I woke up at 11 in the morning feeling terrible from the wine I drank the night before. My head really hurt and I could even move at all. I heard someone mocking at my door and quickly ran up to open it. It was Rosie. What was she doing here?

"Hi."

"Oh, hey Rosie." I tried to sound as cheerful as I possibly could.

"You don't look okay, is everything all right?" I didn't want to bother her with my problems, but I've always talked to her about everything so I shared what happened.

"Not really, do you want to come in?"

"Sure!"

I explained everything that happened yesterday. Sophie, her ion service, the old man and out brake up.

"That's terrible! I never knew about this, I promise! I seriously can't believe that she would do something  like that to you!"

"I believe you, and thank you."

"Why did you not call me over here yesterday? We could of talked about it then."

"I didn't want to bother you," I told her. That was true but the major reason why I didn't call her over was because of the kiss.

"You'll never bother me about things like these." She said in a kind voice. Those words made me more relaxed. I still thought that she was thinking about the kiss, but maybe she already forgot.

"Thanks. Anyway, why did you come over here in the first place?" I asked. I was really curious. Was there a reason why?

"Oh yeah, I was just wondering if you wanted to do something today. My boss gave me a few days off from work since I mentioned you. She's very kind. She understood." Oh yeah! I did ask if she could get a couple of days off. The thing was, I had a horrible headache so I could barely move.

"Actually, I was drinking yesterday, so I have a horrible headache today,"

"Oh my God. How much did you drink?"

"A whole wine bottle..."

"Well, we could just stay at your place all day. I don't mind. I feel kind of lazy today anyway." She said cheerfully. And that's what we did. We sat at home, eating junk food and watching films on Netflix. We both actually had a good time. Slowly my headache started going away, and I was in a much better mood.

We were watching our fifth movie already, and Rosie rested her head on my lap. I'm surprised that she didn't hear my heart beating furiously. I started her head until I she fell asleep completely. Then I gently lifted her fragile body and carried her to the bed room. I pulled a blanket over her and exited back out to the living room to sleep on the couch. I couldn't sleep next to her in the bed even if I really wanted to.

Then I dreamt another dream, this one with only Rosie in it. We were both running across fields of grass, her beautiful silky brown hair blowing in the wind while we both hold hands. Oh how I wish she felt the same way about me, then I would have everything I could ever want in life, and that is her.