sin 01
Sins of Perfection
Everything in life is unexpected. Every single actions and moves are unpredictable. We are happy today, we will be sad tomorrow. However, the more you care less about things in your life, the happier you will be. What kids feel, no parents would know. What kids hide, no soul would tell. This is life. This is the ing things about life.
*JANE*
I had spent a good five hours tonight crying myself at the dark corner beside my bed while the pictures of Jongdae had scattered around in front of me messily. The smile on every Jongdae’s picture cut me bit by bit. When the tears finally stopped, my soul was stolen into a dreamland, hoping for peaceful dreams to wash away the pain that was digging into me hard but sadly, the dreams that welcomed me were nightmare. Disjointed images of Jongdae fighting and dying came over and over again like my mind was stuck on repeat. When the first rays of the sun started to peek through the window and filled the small room with orange and striking light, I decided that I had had enough of being tormented in my sleep. Painfully, I opened my eyes forcefully when the brutal headache building at the base of my spine from the lack of rest.
When I had enough energy to look around the room, I found out that everything had been changed. I was no longer sitting beside my bed, instead, I was tucked fitly in my own cover. The pictures were no longer scattered, but they were nicely arranged and placed on the bedside table. For a moment, I wonder if dad had done this, and I totally realized it was definitely him. My flowery curtains had been drawn and the smell of coffee brewing wafting in from the kitchen. I had no desire to wake up or to face him or to live another miserable day. Slowly, I wrapped myself like a baby in the cover and closed my eyes once again, this time hoping that no nightmares or dreams would chase me away.
I stared mindlessly on the television, having no slightest idea what the program was all about. I saw dad walked in and out from his studies with his casual attires on. He had be home since then, since Jongdae’s …. Jongdae’s left me… left the world. I knew he worried about me, but he never talked about that. Sooner or later he would, and when he did, I didn’t know what would be coming.
‘Have you eaten?’ Dad finally asked, placing himself beside me.
‘Hurmm…’ I mumbled through a sore throat.
‘You look thin nowadays.’ He continued.
Feeling like I had to move a bit, I pushed my legs off my arms and sat like a lifeless zombie, still staring at the ridiculous television programme.
‘Jay…’
Oh god. I’m ed. My stomach still in knots I just gulped myself a large cup of black coffee and I didn’t really like what would be coming from his mouth. Yet, I had no strength to do anything.
‘Jay… would you like to move out? I mean we, move out.’ The old man’s voice struck my eardrum like a dream. Move out?
‘Where?’ I asked soullessly, glancing at him just for a second before playing the gold ring on my left finger.
‘Korea.’ He stopped. He waited for my respond but when he learnt I didn’t react at all, he continued. ‘I know it must be hard for you,’ he hugged my shoulder and kissed on the top of my head. ‘But nothing good will come if you continue to be like this… what has gone, will be gone. And we, must move on. It has been a month you are living dead. It hurts me to watch you like this.’ He kissed me again between my hairs.
The tears had started forming in my eye pool. Slowly, they drained like cascading waterfall. I’d began to sob in his arms.
‘I know how precious Jongdae to you as he is to me. But remember, the one that we love would never leave us. They stay…in here.’ Dad put his left hand on his chest, near to his heart. His eyes are red, I knew he wanted to cry but he held it back. Seeing him like that, I’d realized how bad I were to put him in that state. He was such a busy person, but he was willing to stay home to watch over me. He loved this house so much, but he was willing to move out for my sake. He was already old, but I put him in such a difficult situation where he had to choose me over his important things.
My tears ran down my cheeks, more rushing than before. Without a moment wasted, I hugged him close, feeling his warm love spread through his touch. Slowly, my head nodded in agreement.
Galaxy International High School.
All alone in this foreign land makes me feel like a lost lamb. Dad has to go back to California to settle his things at his workplace, leaving me all alone at the first day in this school. It must have been weird to the school residents as I transfer in the middle of semester. The unfortunate thing, or I should consider lucky is I know no one here and i barely care about anything here. However, this school looks international though, well, it does suit its name. There are many types of people can be seen here, all mixed around either Asian, White, a bit dark, or many other types like this is very prestigous and politically-free environment. No wonder dad has paid a large sum of money for me to get enrolled here.
My first destination here is, the office. People keep looking at me as if I am the new weirdo in cardigan and skinny. Their judgmental looks, urgghh… Better to ignore rather than overthink about them. Thank God, most of the signs are written in at 3 languages, which give me a good way to find the office without asking around all those Richie Rich.
After several decent knocks, I invite myself into the office. Colorful and inspiring, the environment is. Upon my amazement of looking around, a quite young lady which named ‘Kim Seo Rim’ on her nametag greets me. ‘You transferred here, right?’
‘Yes…’ I answer shortly after bowing to her.
She smiles and gestures me to follow here. ‘Come here with me.’ She sits herself in her cubicle, in the middle of the office, and asks me with a sweet smile across her face. ‘You brought your forms and files, right?’
‘Yes…’ I answer awkwardly, in Korean but it mixes with my English accent. ‘Here it is.’
‘You said you’ve been living in California since you are young. I didn’t expect you to understand Korean that well.’ She says without looking at me, as she goes through my personal files.
‘I’ve learnt a bit before coming here.’
‘Your transcripts are amazing. Top 10 students 3 years in a row. Second place in English Literacy Competition.’ The teacher eyes me with amazement, and I could feel a rush of blood stamped on my cheek.
‘It’s all in the past.’ I said to sound as low profile as I can.
She finally puts down my files and turns her chair to face me. ‘Anyways, welcome! Guess it would be best if you could change into your school uniform. I don’t need to show you around the school right?’
‘Yes.’
‘So, I’ll meet you in class, then?’
‘Yes.’
After changing into the school uniform, I force my feet to walk towards the 2-A classroom. It sounds like the teacher is in the middle of lesson when I knock the door nervously, making every single pair of eyes fallen upon my holy existence.
‘She’s here. Come in!’ Kim’s teacher voice sound like hummingbird, welcoming me with non-ending smile. I did reply a small smile as a gratitude and walk myself in the foreign world of 2-A.
‘Please introduce yourself to your classmates.’ She instructs me as I settle myself in the middle of the class, with awkwardness and bullness. Damn it, this is so ing embarrassing and everybody else was like judging me whether I’m a holy cow or something.
With uninterested tone, I begin to introduce myself in English. ‘HI. I’m Jane Bass. Nice meeting you.’
Silent.
Meow. Meow. Meow.
Sounds of cat passing across the corridor echo into the classroom.
An awkward laugh fills the place when Kim teacher seems to cover that ‘wonderful’ situation. Some of the students keep staring at me and some of them begins to whisper to their friends. I continue making myself a statue in front of the class until the lady asks me to sit.
‘I guess you have to sit beside Kai. That’s the only place left.’
I look at the only place left in the class. It is placed at the very back, next to a man who is sitting groggily while crossing his arms, staring at me. Well, I have no choice to sit there unless I am allowed to sit on the floor.
I bow to the teacher first before making my way to my seat. Buzzing of whispers starts to strike my eardrum annoyingly.
‘who is she?’ ‘is she new?’ ‘shall we make her our group?’ ‘she’s more like a weirdos’ ‘but she’s kinda cute, isn’t she?’ ‘who the care?’ ‘she is sitting with Kai’ ‘Oh My Lord, my Kai.’
Some of the boys smile cunningly when our eyes meet. But, I don’t give a damn though. I sit myself comfortably beside the guy and he doesn’t even bother about my existence either. Instead, he continues gazing the blackboard as if he is set to. Urghh.. Whatever. With me settle down in my seat, the lesson continues.
I am walking around the school corridor when I hear someone calling me. ‘Hey !’
I halt and find the source of the caller. There are two girls who are wearing like, the shortest skirt of short skirt and they are dolled beautifully yet animatedly, walking towards me. ‘Are you talking to me?’ I ask them, in an uninterested tone. Judging by their look, I don’t think they want to be so-called friend with me.
‘Why? Do you think there’s anyone else here?’ says the girl who are wearing red stiletto with an annoying rich girl tone. The girl beside her smiles arrogantly, probably feeling proud that she has that kind of as a friend.
‘I thought you’re talking yourself.’
‘What?!’ She screams dramatically, which makes some of the passerby eyeing us. Her friend nudges her on her rib, reminding her to behave properly.
‘Huh!’ She rolls her eyes. ‘So, how does it feel to sit beside the U K?’
I don’t know why, but I don’t like these girls. I mean, what’s up with their tone and attitude? They aint Queen Elizabeth’s great great granddaughter so why do they have to behave like this? ‘Excuse me? UK is a nation and nobody can sit beside it.’ I reply back, acting like I’m the dumbest person in the world.
‘, you really know how to make dung, right?’ The second girl finally blows up her stinky words to my face. This time, the first girl pokes her.
Hurmm.. interesting. What a great teameswork!
The first girl asks me, ‘You really don’t know about the U K?’
‘Do I look like I’m interested in it?’
‘OML.’ The second girl shrieks in annoyance, full of drama and the first girl quickly snaps her.
‘Okay, as I realize you’re just as stupid as your face, lemme tell you something. U K is Ullzhang Kings. And Kai, the one that you sit with, is the leader among them.’ She stops. Then the second girl continues, ‘So, don’t you dare to split your dung on them or…’
‘You’re a toast, jijibe.’ They both speak at the same time, staring at me.
So, that's all for the first introduction. It's a bit boring and blabla~ but it introduces the girl. Introduction about the Ullzhang members will be done next!
Do comments and subscribe if you like it. But please don't expect much of my writing. haha^^
THANKS IN ADVANCE!!!
Comments