It was still too early to wake up the kids for school, the sun still haven’t rise in the sky, and he was glad they got some time alone. Jinyoung peeked a kiss in Shinwoo’s lips, and then another, trying to wake him up slowly just as he liked it, playing with his hair and touching his nose with the point of his finger.

“It’s still dark outside” Shinwoo said, just one eye opened. Jinyoung just kissed him again.

“That means we still have time” he teased.

“What about a shower, baby? Kids can’t find us in there”

“It’d be a pleasure”

Shinwoo liked how Jinyoung always seemed to understand him so well. He was in the need of him that morning, and Jinyoung knew it even before he was even awake. Or maybe the amazing thing was how the both of them were in the need of the other at the same time, and how they both needed a shower when it was still dark outside. It was amazing how they hearts beat as one.

Shinwoo was nervous that day. Morning cannot solve your problems, even if it makes you feel like it could. The surgery had gone as planned. Mrs. Jung was alright, the last few days spent in the hospital with his husband, Jinyoung visiting her daily. Kids were alright: playing with David and practicing for the Happy Prince play. But the day had to come and it had come; Mrs. Jung had to leave the hospital and have some rest.

Meaning that she couldn’t go right back to the countryside.

Meaning she and Mr. Jung had to stay with them.

Meaning the nightmare was going to start all over.

If Shinwoo was nervous himself, he didn’t even want to think about how Jinyoung was feeling at his office. They haven't had anymore fights since the day he took the boys to the park, but he didn’t know if it was because they talked about things, or because Jinyoung’s parents had left the house the day after to go to the hospital. All he knew is that he wanted to be someone who his boy could lean on. Only he didn’t knew how much he could take if they messed up with their children.

He just sighed while making up the bed at the guests room.

 “Maybe we should make a card?”  Junghwan broke the silence while they were coloring in the living room. The sound of Pororo’s opening as background music.

“What for?” asked Baro, who was drawing a soccer match.

“For grandma” Channie said “you know she’s coming out the hospital today”

Baro kept coloring and said nothing, as if he hadn’t heard him. Gongchan gave Sandeul an angry look, like saying it’s your twin, you talk to him.

“Baro-yah” the boy tried, but the twin didn’t look up.

“Baro-yah look at me” he tried again, pinching his shoulder “don’t be a meanie, Baro-yah. Baro-yah”

“What do you want?” he asked, pissed.

“I don’t like her that much either, but when someone comes out from the hospital you have to be nice”

“But she’s bad to us. And to eomma”

“But we’re not bad to people” Junghwan said.

Baro sighed, Junghwan was almost never right, but when he was, he really was. “Okay, let’s make a card. But I won’t do my better drawings”

“You’re great hyung” Gongchan said smiling.

Jinyoung was walking all alone at the cold corridors of the hospital with a bouquet of flowers on his hands, white they were, because it was his mom favorite color. He didn’t know why he cared so much; his mother was mean to his family, his mother was the one who told him to leave the house. But then again, his mother was the one who called him and visited him and cared for him when his father hadn’t. His mother was the one who gave him his first guitar. His mother was the one he composed his first song for. He supposed it was natural to care.

He found the room where his mom was staying and knocked on the door, his father opened it, they gave each other a cold hand and Jinyoung entered the room. His mother was sitting on the hospital bed being checked by the doctor one last time, the suitcase waiting by the wall. She looked tired, but she made some kind of smile when she saw his son.

“She has to come back in a week in order to check her heart” said the doctor to Jinyoung when he was done “But she’s doing fine, more than other patients”

“I’m glad to hear that” he said, and he really was.

“I’ll see you in a week”

“I’ll see you then” Jinyoung said, and as soon as the man left he turned back to hug his mother. “I’m glad you’re doing okay, everyone’s waiting for you at home” it wasn’t exactly true, but a white lie wasn’t that bad.

“I hope you still have the pink cover in your car, because I’m freezing” it’s all that she said, but to Jinyoung, it sounded very sweet.

When the nurse came to take her to the car, his father insisted to push the wheelchair himself –hospital protocol, she could walk- even if Jinyoung wanted to do it. It was a bless anyway, because his phone rang and it was Shinwoo calling.

“Hello?” he didin’t say baby, so he’ll know he was with his parents.

“Hi baby” Shinwoo said “How’s your mom?”

“She’s doing fine, we’re leaving the hospital right now.”

“Great. Just letting you know that I’m almost done with lunch and that guests room is ready”

“Perfect, you’re the best.” He really wanted to say I love you or something like that, but he really couldn’t near his parents “I’ll see you in half an hour”

“I’ll see you then” and when he was just about to hung up Shinwoo spoke again “And Jin, we’re going to be okay”

“Thank you, baby” he said, meaning that he loved him.

She had noticed how his son had said baby at the end of the phone call when they were leaving the hospital, but she didn’t say anything, because she was tired and just recovering from a heart surgery. Besides, he had brought her white flowers, and after all this time she didn’t think he still remembered it was her favorite colour.

They were in the car back home and Mrs. Jung was sitting in the back seat next to his spouse, covered in soft pink fabric, listening to his son whispering the lyrics to Drunken Confession on the radio. He seemed quite happy, much more relaxed than the last time he drove them to his house, it seemed that this time he wasn’t even going to tell them the rules.

1. Not messing up with the children.
2. Not saying the words , queer, or any of the kind.

She kind of understood the part of the words, but what could she do when the kids were so misbehaved. One of the twins –she couldn’t remember if he was the oldest or not- looked always like a delinquent, and she didn’t understand how his son could ever let him dress up like that. Oh and that glorious rapping. It must have inherited it from that man. His eomma. How could you call eomma a man, for god’s sake. It was somehow sick. His son was somehow sick, even if she hurt herself a little everytime she thought about it.

It was little Gongchan who opened the door, and when she saw his Grandma looking tired and weak, he didn’t hesitate and hugged her tight. Mrs. Jung stood still, not knowing what to do next, when was the last time any of the boys had hugged her? At least she liked Gongchan the most, so she smiled, or tried.

“Grandma, Welcome home!” said Junghwan, and Sunwoo waved a small ‘hello’ by his side. She smiled despite her will. They also said “Welcome home Grandpa” but he didn’t smile.

They sat down for lunch, bibimbap and kimchi stew by Shinwoo for everyone. Jinyoung sat happily next to his spouse, and Mrs. Jung noticed how her own husband was tense at the view. The kids were eating without noticing anything.

“Deullie hyung” Gongchan spoke to his brother who had his cheeks stuffed with food.

“Mmm?”

“Go get the thing we did”

“Why me?” he asked after he swallowed “I’m eating”

“Just go hyung”

“I’m eating, tell Baro”

“Hyung” said Gongchan and gave him a very significant look

“Okay, you ugly kimchi” he said and got up

Shinwoo smiled “hey, hey, where are you going?” he nagged him

“But Channie said…” Junghwan complained

“Is Channie your eomma?”

Junghan gave Gongchan a death glare. He and Sunwoo both laughed. “Can I go get the thing?”

“What thing?”

“A thing” Junghwan urged “Quickly, I’m missing all the food”

“Ask appa” Shinwoo smiled

“asdjhaskjdhaskjdads” Junghwan had a mental breakdown “Appa pleaase? I’m hungry!”

“Just go” he laughed

Mrs. Jung found herself smiling at the scene without noticing, but she came back to a straight face before anyone could notice. Junghwan was kind of cute. He still had kimchi all over his mouth when complaining he was hungry, which was amusing. But of course it wasn’t, and he had to lose weight.

The boy was back in a minute with a piece of paper in his hands, he gave it to his brother and got lost in the food again, thing that made his parents chuckle. Sunwoo just rolled his eyes.

“Jung Grandma” Gongchan said, interrupting lunch “we have something for you, we all made it so we hope you like it”

The old lady grabbed it and found herself looking at a drawing of a big red heart with glitter on it that read “GET WELL SOOON” and at the other face of the paper there was a drawing of her and the three kids, full color and smiles.  She stared at it more time than necessary probably, just because she had never received such thing since Jinyoung was a kid, and she suddenly felt very warm inside. It was a strange feeling, so she just said “thank you kids, it’s really pretty” and returned to eat.

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Short chapter for my house is a chaos now. Hopefully next week will be better. I promise.