Prologue

Two weeks had passed and she didn't get her period yet. She's never late, not ever since she turned 16. Sandara had her period monthly. The idea of her being pregnant did make her heart swell in happiness. With her too much excitement. She got on her feet and picked her phone to call Wooyoung the great news. Pregnant or not. She's too happy to share and tell him the possibility. At last. She thought.

"Hey, honey. I'm sorry I'm not yet done boss wants me to stay..." Wooyoung said as soon as he picked up the phone but Sandara said something that made him pause.

"I'm pregnant." She happily said and squealed. If she hadn't saw the calendar on her room she wouldn't have notice. 

The other line had been silent for a moment and later Wooyoung's voice made her sighed in relief, she thought, he hung up on her. "Where are you?" He ask a little breathless. 

Wooyoung had run off from his boss as soon as he heard her. Pregnant. A little life part of him is living inside her womb that Wooyoung didn't care of his boss will fire him the next day. He was excited and the same time nervous about it. 

Sandara chuckled and her heart race. "Home. I don't know yet, hon. I haven't gotten a pregnancy test. I might be or might be not pregnant but I'm late. Two weeks." She explained. 

"I love you, Sandara. You don't know how happy I am. I'll be there. Right away. We will both find out. Pregnant or not. I'll still love you with all my heart." He said those words that made Sandara's heart skip a beat. For almost 6 years of being together, Wooyoung had never let her feel less. Each day he made her feel like she's the only woman in the world. 

A single tear left her eye as a huge smile played on her lips. "I love you too." 

Just as she said those words, Sandara didn't know those were the last few words she'll be able to tell him. That night, Wooyoung had a fatal accident that cause his life. The police and the other who witnessed said he'd been driving fast and because of the heavy rain the road were slippery. His car clashed with the truck he didn't see coming. 

Sandara park her car in front of the hospital and run inside without giving a damn what she looked like. She still wears her grey sweat pants and a white tshirt. She rushed to her car as soon as she received the call about what happened. 

She reach the front desk and ask, she looked like a mess. Her hair was all over her face and tears are still spilling from her swollen eyes. Cheeks flushed and her hands are trembling. "Wooyoung... Jang Wooyoung. " She said. The nurse nodded in understanding. 

"He is still in inside the emergency room, ma'am." The nurse answered after a few seconds she checked from her computer. Sandara didn't wait long and dashed through the emergency room. The air in her lungs left when a doctor come out from the double white door of the emergency room. 

"Miss Park?" The doctor ask. 

Sandara nodded, went dry of crying for almost an hour. "Yes. I'm his fiancée. " the doctor moved beside her and hold her cold and trembling hands. One look to the doctors eyes, she knew what she was about to say. 

"I'm sorry. We did tried everything we could. I'm sorry." 

Sandara pulled her hands from the doctors grasp and shook her head. "No.." She whispered. Her hands covered her face as she sob harder and falling in her knees. "No! No! No!" She screamed. 

"Please.. You can't let him die. I'll... No! Just please.." She begged.

*
*

"Babycakes?" 

Sandara lift her head and smile. "Chullie!" She stood and Heechul spread his arms and hugged his best friend tight. 

"How are ya, babycakes? Didn't drink yourself to oblivion last night are you?" He ask teasingly, his eyes soften and leaned to kiss her hair before releasing her. 

Sandara chuckled and slap his shoulder. "No. It's been 5 years, Chullie. Im still hurting inside but I've got to move on." She smiled. But the sorrow and sadness lingers in her eyes made his heartache every time. 

"I still love him you know. I'll always will." 

"Awwww. Babycakes! Come here! You little! You're making me feel guilty. I'm sorry I wasn't there to comfort you last night. You know, I can't say no to the offer." He said and pulled her into his arms and smiled down at her apologetically. 

Her eyes moisten as she looked straight at his eyes. She smiled. "He was excited. I told him I'm might be pregnant that night." She said and close her eyes as tears fell. Heechul sat and pulled her to his lap and wrap his arms around her, listening. 

She sobbed and he let her. Sandara always got emotional when Wooyoung's death anniversary comes and Heechul felt bad for not being with her last night. "If I didn't tell him and just waited for him to go home and got the pregnancy test first. He wouldn't have..." She sobbed harder and Heechul shook his head and cupped her face with his both hands. 

"Look at me, Miss Sandara Park. I've said this for a millionth time and I won't get tired. It's not your fault and please stop blaming yourself. Just remember he died happy, at least." 

Sandara looked away pulling away from him. "I should have confirmed it first. He died assuming. That made me feel worse. I felt bad about it, every time. " 

Sandara went to bed without even touching the dinner Heechul prepared for her. She didn't felt like eating, the stabbing pain on her heart made even sleeping impossible. She had moved on but she didn't want to forget once in her life, she had Wooyoung and she didn't know if she could ever love again that much. Each year of his anniversary, she hides herself from everyone and mourns his death.