This month is filled with sadness but with so much happiness at the same time. I broke up with my Sungjae one week after our first anniversary. I don't love him anymore I don't know why but whatever I do the feelings is not the same anymore. I felt nothing everytime he texts me and talk to me so I ended things with him already. It hurts me because I have loved him so much before and I think I had so much when were together since he's my first love. So cheesy but it's true.

But when there's sadness there's always happiness right after it. That night when I broke up with him I texted Kai. He comforts me very well. He is so mature and very good in giving advice he helped me a lot. Im so lucky I have him as a friend. But Im very much lucky if I have him as my boyfriend.

After that night, Kai is different. He is more caring than usual and he is more sweeter this time. Were kinda close now and we felt so comfortable texting each other. Sometimes he's ringing me but we don't usually talk on the phone that long. When we see each other at school we just smile at each other since were not in the same class and the first term is over so it's holidays. I think it'll take time until we get comfortable with each other in person.

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Enrollment is now going on. I still haven't enroll myself for the second term yet but I will soon. I have to because holidays will be over in 2 weeks.

I want to be in the same class as him. So I can see him everyday and be with him everytime. Shoot! I have a crush on him already. Since when? Well I don't know I never realize that I will like this guy. I mean when you look at him his not that good looking. Well I guess I didn't like a guy because of his looks this time. I liked him because of him. Being him. All about him. Aish! What's happening to me. I never felt this to all of my crushes. I mean it's just a crush. Wait. What? If it's not just a simple crush then maybe... Noooo! Im inlove? Oh gosh. I can't. His my friends ex-boyfriend who she still love until now. I can't help it everytime he text me. I can't stop myself from "kyaaaa-ing" here and there. I can't stop smiling like crazy. He got me tipsy already. I wonder if he feel the same way too.

My second love perhaps?