“None. I don’t have one.”

The night was bone chilling; every vein on his hands was practically frozen from the exceptional temperature as he braced them bravely. Nothing was stopping Changhyun, not even the traffic, because when it became congested the young man took out his light, folded bicycle and cycled through the whole road seemingly smooth. Passing dozens of cars and making his way back to the station, his eyes were burning, however not by the extreme weather but rather by the determination that was helping him to survive another rough day. 

♦

When he finally did arrive, he left the bike there and rushed inside while ignoring every stare and glare given by all the convicted people that had passed by. He was renowned for a reputation that was incredible and tactical, single-handedly catching every bad guy out in his street. But it was only because he was always in a searching, for Changjo.

He huffed and puffed as he stretched his aching spine, leaning slightly backwards and gulping every last drop of his Americano. His heart however was increasingly restless, the time he had waited for so long, fought so hard for had finally arrived. Changjo had arrived. So, taking the deepest breath possible, he calmed his mind and carefully thought out a plan which, strangely, like always, when it came to the boy he loved dearly, planning was useless. But he had to face it anyway, no, he craved this moment, planning was the least of his problems. There were thousands of questions, hundreds of topics to be discussed, and honestly the only thing roaring inside his mind was how he wanted to say to Changjo that he had missed the boy like crazy.

He missed Changjo like hell. That was all.

But when he was facing Changjo, standing quietly in front of the lock up and looking directly at the person who he once knew and loved so much, his tongue was caught between his teeth and a familiar lump had clogged out his throat.

He wanted to cry, he wanted to laugh, he wanted to smile but Changjo never noticed him. In fact the black haired boy was just staring out the window soullessly, mindlessly blinded from Changhyun. His eyes however was painfully similar, it was blue, deep and enchanting, a view that was intoxicating for Changhyun and so the smaller had stood along, silently cherishing a view that was long lost. Changjo, like Changhyun had changed just as much. His hair was a darker shade, though it had always been black and his skin was way paler, his lips however was tainted deep with crimson and there were these beautiful, brooding shadows around his eyelids, framing those breath-taking blue peepers elegantly. There was a certain aura that had resonated from the boy, a strange stunning aura that felt rather cold and mysterious at the same time. 

Frankly, just by the way his hair was pulled back had made Changjo look and feel like a whole new person. And it scared Changhyun a little. 

But there was no more time to waste, he had waited too long. “Hey.Changjo?”

He held on the bars for dear life as he waited for a response. Changjo turned around, calmly locking eyes with the smaller and a smirk slipped from his tense lips. His eyes were brighter than the moon, neon under the dim surrounding and truthfully, the boy had looked hauntingly monstrous. He was so cold and lifeless that his peaceful expression had struck deep into Changhyun’s spine, giving the latter a shiver down his back. But Changhyun couldn’t deny, Changjo had never looked so stunning, so much that it made his mind swirl into thin air. 

“Excuse me?”

Even his voice was completely different, it sounded the same but deeper, more sensual rather and it made Changhyun so nervous that he had to swallow his spit so that his dry throat would allow him to speak. But before he could,

“Ahjussi, let me out. I want to go home”

“W..what?”

“I said… hmm, you must be new here. Ahjussi, let me out and I’ll give you my number. Heck, you can call me Changjo or whatever, just let me out”

Changhyun’s eyes widened at the statement, not only that Changjo had felt so different, he was agonizingly foreign. “Changjo-yaa… it’s me. What are you talking about… huh?” his voice was broken, scattered and his fingers were trembling as it reached Changjo’s arm, holding on frailly at the smooth cottony fiber. Changjo on the other hand was completely in control, he was in fact staring cunningly into the smaller’s eyes and cutting into Changhyun like butter. And as his lips came dangerously closer between the metal rods, the young, canny man whispered

“I’m not Changjo but I’ll act like him if you want me to. Now. Let. Me. Out.”

Changhyun trembled at the hot air grazing over his neck as his heart crumpled; the world had suddenly bled of color. It was pitch black. 

“Hmm?”

The sound of Changhyun’s fingers scraping off the black, thick sweater was screechy and loud as he abruptly turned away and walked ahead.                                                                           

 “ Too late boy. Changjo that we both had loved… he’s gone. Just like my beloved brother you killed”                                                                                                                                                                       

Those words for once were forgotten by Yoo Changhyun, it had rusted along time and was kept hidden from his conscious mind. But that moment when he was outside the station, holding onto his chest and gritting his teeth, holding onto his crumbling patience and endurance, it had echoed crystal clear inside his head. He wanted to scream and just let loose but he had made a promise, he won’t ever act weak anymore. He would never run away, afraid of the problems that he would face the moment he had found Changjo. Least of all that was the initial plan. However the fact that Changjo didn’t remember him and acted so foreign felt like a catastrophe rather than a puny crisis.  

But he was stronger than before, he whispered. 

“Excuse me, I thought you were going to help me get out” the taller spoke calmly as he glared at Changhyun who passed by silently. But then, the fact that the smaller was going to Hyunsik, carrying a folder written with his name, made the young man a bit more anxious than what he planned. Then as he grabbed onto the metal bars and closed his eyes, he simply focused on Changhyun and slowly the sound of the latter’s heartbeat emerged. Then, as the latter spoke, though he was a few feet away, Changjo would hear every word perfectly clear. 

“Uhm, Sunbae… I’ll take care of this one if you don’t mind.”

“Why? Nah, he’s a minor but the things he did were pretty severe. He deserve at a few years in Juvi and maybe even prison, one man just died in his young hands. Yoon leader is convicting him to homicide, nothing you can do here Changgie. “

“But it was accidental, right? From the report, it says that the man was standing too close to the cliff anyway. The claws marks were, however, non-human right, so this boy is practically innocent! And the fact that there were twelve others that were beaten up, simply mean he’s a great fighter and he defended himself well. Self-defence!!”

“Sunbae… he’s just a boy.”

“Yeah well, that’s kinda true. But I can’t help him without the consent from any of his guardians. And that kid, Changgie, I’ve had him a few times but I never even knew his name up until now. He’s tough as a rock, you can get nothing out of him, I tell you.”

“It’s a waste of your talented tim…”

“I don’t care, I can do it. I wanna help him Sunbae. We both know he’s alright, right?”

Changjo’s opened his eyes and turned away, the passing car lights from his small, lock-up window was a shade of red and slowly, the whole room got darker. He was disturbed, why would a grubby detective work so hard to save him even when, in reality, he did hurt those men, even killed one. But Changhyun was right, everything he did was to protect, all he did was to defend himself. He had no other way but to kill those low-lives so that he would survive. But the way the elder was defending him was not the only thing that haunted the boy’s mind; it was how his heart twitched every moment he looked at the young detective.  He remembered nothing, Changhyun was a stranger but there was a tug in his guts, an uncomfortable, annoying tug.  

♦

“Hey, don’t you get sleepy? It’s … already four ya’know” Changhyun tapped on the bars as he looked back and leaned against them. Facing the cubicles, he spoke again “Aren’t you hungry?” 

“You really should stop caring about me now. I’m not a kid, I’m a killer. I killed a man and he’s dead…and…I’m going to be locked up for a few decades. So it wouldn’t matter, but that aside, no, I’m not sleepy.”

Changhyun smiled as he played with the small, brown button on his navy leather jacket. “So you’re hungry” the smaller retorted, still fiddling with the small, round bud. Changjo, however was getting uncomfortable, the tug inside his gut was getting stronger, in fact his tummy was already in a suffocating knot. But he managed to stay calm as he disregarded the statement and scooted closer to the window and whistled. “Hey…” Changhyun mumbled, as his lips twitched. “Tell me your name…” the frail touch on the button became a desperate grip as he waited for an answer. The whistling stopped. 

“It’s on the file.” He answered, coldly. “I know, but I want to hear it from you. These idiots are so dumb sometimes; they could happily change your name ya’know.” The latter replied as his hands started to tremble gently. “Come on.”

“Choi Jong”