I paced around the house, this was just too much. I can't stop thinking about Kris. Why? Why did this have to happen?

This is all my fault, if only i didn't say i wanted to meet him again, this would have never happened to him. I want to go see him, i want to see how he's doing but i don't want to put them in danger. I am such a useless and pathetic person, this is all my fault.

Zero, Zero will harm them and i don't want that. I just have to stay away from now on, but i still want to go and see kris. I need to see him or else i'd be feeling guilty and worried forever.

It's just for a short while right? Zero won't find out, just one peek at him will do.

"That's right, i'll just go see him for awhile and return, zero won't know, but wait, how in the world am i going to sneak into the castle? God! Why?" i bit my fingernail, why was it so hard?

Wait, i could just disguise myself as a maid and put on the sick mask to hide my face. The changing area for the maids was near the backdoor of the castle that no one knew except the people in the castle. It's not that far, i could sneak in the castle. It was as simple as that.

"Ok! I'll do just that! Just one peek will do!" I said to myself and burst out of the door with a determined face. I used a scarf to hide my face and made my way to the castle.

I looked around warily and sighed in relief when i saw that no one noticed me. This will be the last time i'll be seeing them, i'll stay away after this. It's the only way to ensure their safety.

They'll marry the girls and live their happy lives. They'll be safe and happy. I'll sacrafice my happiness for theirs. I can do that, they are much more important than me and i know that they'll never forgive me, i hurt them too much.

I finally arrived at the backdoor, i looked around just to check that no one was following me.

There was no one here, great. I took a peek through the backdoor, there was no guards, good.

I tried to open the backdoor but it was locked. , i should've known. Why was i so stupid?

Wait, i have the key! I took out the key and smiled. Yes! Thank the heavens that i always carry keys around no matter where i go. I slowly and quietly unlocked the door.

I slowly sneaked in and quickly ran to the changing room which looked like a mini house.

I closed the door and locked it just in case. I quickly found a maid uniform my size. I wore it and pinned my hair up just like how our kingdom's maid have theirs up. I put on the sickness mask that covered half of my face. I dusted my clothing and quickly sneaked into the castle itself.

I looked down, trying to locate myself to Kris' room when i bumped into someone. I looked up, it was the head maid.

"You're new aren't you?"

"Yes madam," i said, changing my voice so that it sounded lower.

"Why are you wearing that ghastly mask?" she asked in an annoyed voice.

I resisted rolling my eyes. Why in the world would wear this other than when i'm sick. Do you have no common sense?

"I'm sick madam and i do not want to miss out a day at work so i am working with this mask on," i answered, looking at her.

She scoffed and rolled her eyes, glaring at me, " Imbecilic fool, soon you would be hoping to get sick often just to skip work."

So this was how she felt about working, i never knew that.

"Get back to work!" she barked at me and i lowered my head, bowing and shuffled away.

I looked up and tried to locate myself to Kris' room. This place brought back so many memories. I then quickly walked into kris' room. I slowly crept into the room and i was so heartbroken to see kris in this state.

I took off my mask

I walked to his side and caressed his face, " i'm sorry," i whispered. Kris was was pale and he looked so weak. His face was pale and he looked like he was on the v