The waiting room was full of anticipation after the boys went out. Taehee and the other trainees were sitting by the couch, still sweating from the mad rush earlier, speaking in hushed whispers. JiEun unnie look as if she went mad just now rushing from one member to another, tidying up their hair and fixing their makeup in just 10 minutes that she pranced along the mirrors, muttering, "They'd better win." darkly. Everyone knows how big this award is, not only to the boys but to the whole of South Korea itself. The grandness of the award is parallel to the difficulty of getting it too, and it'll be a real big achievement if they got it after debuting for just 2 years.

  But they have to get it. Everyone witnessed how hard the boys worked for the past 2 years- no, even before they debuted. In Jiyong and Taeyang's case, they'd worked for 8 years.

  "God bless." I whispered anxiously, fingers entwining together before going to help with the packing up.

  The door burst open for the second time and this time, there was no rush, no panic.Time almost froze as we focused on TOP and Seungri, the rest still behind them. We stared at them with anticipation. TOP's eyes looked slightly reddened, which made me more nervous. Why am I like this when it's not even my award?

  Then it happened. He held out the trophy silently. The room held its breath in awe as we tried to absorb what was happening before JiEun unnie lost in and ran towards them, screaming, "YOU DID IT!", pulling the maknae for an embrace as the room exploded into cheers and Taeyang, who had clearly been crying before, came into the room, bowing to everyone and thanking them for their hard work.

  A smile spreaded across my face without realising and I craned my neck, trying to find Jiyong before a pair of strong arms wrapped around me suddenly.

  Daesung, who seems like he's still hicoughing from the tears, squeezes me right before choking out, "We did it, we did it. We got the Daesang. My dad.. My dad's gonna be proud of me.."

  I smiled, reminded of that morning on the roof two years ago. they had really worked hard, I thought as I patted his back gently, smiling, "yeah, you did it, bro. You deserved it."

  From the corner of my eye, Taehee stood a distance away, watching us weirdly, looking as though she's trying to convince herself of something and I immediately pushed Daesung off gently. The awkwardness returned as he rubbed his nose and smiled, staring at the ground.

  "I'm sure Taehee wants to congratulate you too, Daesung. Run along." I said, nodding my head in her direction before Daesung shifted his feet towards her somehow reluctantly. I watched Taehee being all excited as i smiled, thinking how cute they looked together and wishing slightly that it was Taehee he liked.

  A familiar strong grip clamped down upon my wrist and I jumped, reflectively punching whoever that grabbed me in defense. The leader took a step back, a hand on his chest where my fist landed as he glared at me angrily before pulling me out of the now teary and excited room.

  "Yah! What are you-" I shouted outside the hallway, my feet desperately trying to halt to a stop but he only glanced back at me and tugged with another gust of force. I stumbled foward and he dragged me through the corridors to the fire evacuate stairway, and up all the way to the rooftop of the building before he finally released me.

  "What the- Kwon Jiyong!" I screamed, rubbing my wrist furiously, "What the hell is wrong with you?! Look, my wrist is all red! Is this how you treat a girl? Don't I have legs? Must you always pull me?"

  "So you still know you're a girl, huh?" Jiyong shouted, giving a snort of sarcastic laughter as I clenched my fist. What is wrong with him again? "I though you almost forgot! Because I've never seen a girl who'd throw her arms around men so casually!"

  "What?"

  "Am I wrong? Laughing and flirting with men-" He lashed out mercilessly, his eyes that had already been red after winning the award only went redder"Can you at least control yourself to wait until-"

  "WAIT UNTIL WHAT? EXACTLY WHAT, KWON JIYONG?" I snapped, my nails digging into my hands agitatedly. Jiyong rolled his eyes and glared at the wall, pursing his lips together tightly, looking as though he's trying to keep the tears in his eyes while mine had already flowed down pathetically as I lost control.

  "So that's why you have been ignoring me for the past few weeks huh, Jiyong? Because of Daesungie?" I shrieked, flinging my arms exasperated while he just exhaled heavily, rolling his eyes. I raised a hand that's trembling so hard from the anger to wipe away the useless tears that streaked across my face, burning my face.

  "So this is why you chose to into my life, make me attached and then dump me in a freaking fridge? Because my mum threw me away like trash died and daesung saved my head from being crashed by a damn car?!" I yelled, the stupid tears overflowing again and this time, I gave up trying to clean them off. Jiyong looked up at me, his expression surprised and shocked as he blinked.

  "I.. I didn't know.." He began, taking a step towards me looking sorry but I cut him off, backing away.

  "Ofcourse you didn't, you jerk." I whimpered, losing strength gradually as I sniffled, "Is that why you ignored me? I tried every way to make you listen to me. I thought about what I did wrong every nighjt but I couldn't.. I just couldn't.. Do you know how I felt? How many nights of sleep I lost? How freaking miserable I am? You didn't even gave me a chance to talk, Jiyong. Is it fun? Coming into my life and make me trust people then try to leave? Is it fun, making me like you then ignoring me like I'm invisible?"

  "What.. what did you say..?" He blinked, eyes softening immediately as he raised his hand, attempting to touch my face but I knocked it harshly away, snarling at him as tears continued to drop. 

  "I said I hate you."

  "No, seriously, what did you say?" He said, moving so close to me now his chest was inches from mine as he gently lifted my chin up so my eyes was trapped in his.

  "Are you deaf? I said I hate you." I mumbled, trying to maintain my angry glare as I sobbed again, my emotion still stuck in the outburst.

  The corner of his lips stretched upwards and he grinned, showing the gummy smile that I had loved so much before whispering,

  "No, you can't do that, because I think the reason I'm so pissed off with you, is that..."

  I swallowed, trying to move away, my heart thumping crazily as warmth flooded my cheeks. Sensing my movement, he swiftly s his arms behind my back and held me in place before he leaned down.

  "Is that I love you too." he finished and tilted his head so our lips touched.

  But this time, its different. Different from the one in the playground a year ago. This time, I shut my eyes. This time, I decided to believe him. This time, I decided that,

  Maybe it isn't so hard to admit that I fell for a completely annoying jerk that does nothing but rap, write music and bite his nails.

finally.